Hope you guys like this chappie! I'm sorry that its a bit long. I got a bit carried away 3 pages! ooops! Anyway ENJOY!

Nothing into something

These last few years being now 23. I have been alive but dead since my Edward… died. It has been 5 years and they have been years of hell. Of course I took into account that he might be alive but when I saw how it had crashed on the news with Alice and Emmett all my hope shattered leaving me and Alice crying all over each other while Emmett held us trying not to cry himself.

They somehow tried and managed to move on with their lives always berating me to do the same and get another boyfriend at that point I had snapped and screamed at them. How could I get a new boyfriend when all my love is still with Edward? How was I supposed to get on with my live when Edward was my life? Of course I apologised rapidly to my friends but they understood and forgave me.

I would act happy for my friends but since Rosalie lived with Emmett and Alice lived with Jasper in their apartments I was left alone in Me and Edwards apartment and though all of them asked me all the time to live with them I couldn't. First I didn't want to spoil their love nests and secondly watching them be together 24/7 happily in love would make my heart hurt and split in half. It was bad enough in the daytime when Alice took us on ENDLESS shopping trips.

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"BELLA! GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED WE NEED TO GO!" Alice shouted in my ear. For a pixie she had A LOT stored. I tried to swat her but she flitted away. I groggily looked up at her through my lashes

"Alice!" I groaned "Not again!"

"Yes again. I found cute red top that would look GREAT on you it will"- I blanked out after that and made my way to the bathroom. I don't know why I gave Alice the spare key!

I was finally able to get over… him. I couldn't say his name it would hurt so much. Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie were practically beaming when they noticed the change in me and no move to do ANYTHING that would remind me of him.

I had a steaming hot shower to wake me up and I used my favourite strawberry body wash. He liked the smell. It was the only thing that reminded me of him and I couldn't give it up.

I brushed my teeth quickly and I walked back into my bedroom in my bath robe. Alice had laid a sky blue strapless dress on my bed. I slipped it on and fitted the white belt on my waist. I shrugged on the white half cardigan and slipped on blue flats that matched my dress. Thank you Alice. With my klutziness I would've died within 2 minutes of even wearing the tiniest heels.

I walked over to my bedroom door and knocked twice. It was a signal for Alice to say that it was safe to come in. Not to my surprise Alice and Rosalie came in gaping at how I looked.

"OMG THAT OUTFIT LOOKS SOOOO CUTE ON YOU!" They both screamed in unison as they came and hugged me.

When they let go of me they looked at me expectantly. I sighed and went to sit down in the makeup chair. As soon as I sat down Alice started on my makeup and Rosalie plugged in the straightener.

When they were finally done I looked at myself and gasped as I always did. My hair had been straightened perfectly, bouncing on my shoulders. My lips had a light pink gloss and my eyes were more outlined and defined with eyeliner and mascara and my eye shadow was a light grey making my eyes look slightly smoky. I squealed and jumped into my best friends arms. "Thank you guys SO much!"

When I turned around I saw Rosalie with a face of mock seriousness "I know you look gorgeous Bella so don't try anything funny with my Emmett 'kay?" We all laughed but I became jealous of the way she could say my Emmett. I wish I could say my Edward…

I took a large gulp and linked arms with Alice and Rosalie and together we walked down to the garage. Jasper and Emmett were waiting for us at the mall. I can't believe Alice managed to rope them into our shopping trip.

Emmett enveloped me in a bone crushing hug and then moved to Alice but she screamed and hid behind Jasper making us all chuckle.

Alice managed to drag us through 10 different stores before she let us have lunch. I had a constant blush on my face. Half the articles Alice had bought were for me and I hate it when people spend money on me. And because I have probably fell at least 5 times.

I poked and prodded my burger, not in the mood for eating. Normally at this time me and Edward would've escaped Alice and we would be at home watching a movie but now…

I turned around staring longingly at the exit when I saw my lovely bronze haired green eyed Edward. My Edward. I wanted to scream his name but I couldn't find my voice. I nudged Alice and made her turn around her eyes grew wide and grin broke out on her face like mine. We both turned around,

"WE FOUND HIM! EDWARD! WE FOUND EDWARD AND HE IS RIGHT OVER THERE!" We shouted at them. They all stood bolt upright and looked to where we were pointing. They all grinned and started running to him. I did too but I feel short. Hanging on his arm was a girl who looked like a supermodel; she had strawberry blonde hair and unfriendly blue eyes that said "If you come near him you'll be sorry." My heart sunk. He has another girlfriend? I could feel the tears well up in my eyes threatening to spill. I used all my effort to keep them at bay. I then slowly walked towards the others.

Alice jumped on his back and Rosalie fell into his chest. Emmett and Jasper hugged them all together and I saw blondie gap in surprise. When they broke apart my Edward was beaming and hugging them all individually explaining to her that this was his family.

I stopped just behind Alice. She saw me and put her arm around me. I didn't feel any better though.

"And who are you?" I heard a velvety voice asked me. I nearly gasped. It really was my Edward although he wasn't really mine now he was this girl's. I felt my heart shatter at the thought.

Alice nudged me back into reality. "Uh… I'm Bella." I whispered quietly making sure not to look in his eyes as I always got lost in them.

We all then turned to stare at blondie she blushed lightly. Nothing like how my blush was burning. Edward saw us staring and tightly wound his arm around her… like he used to do to me.

"This is Tanya. She is my girlfriend. We just moved here. We live next to Oxford. We just got enrolled." He announced proudly. He bent down and kissed… Tanya on the cheek. She closed her eyes and snuggled into him. The shards of my heart shattered again leaving it barely there. My heart ached uncontrollably. I wished I was the girl under Edwards protective arm.

Alice squealed. "We go to Oxford too! Including Bella!" She said hastily including me. Edward didn't seem to take much interest in me. I slowly snuck out of the crowd. Alice held her car keys to the Porsche and I took them. I would have to thank her later.

I ran to the car, falling twice and drove out. I fought tears all the way. I parked the car badly and ran to my apartment feeling lucky that I was in the same building as Alice and Rose. I fumbled with the key to my apartment the tears already starting to flow making my hands shake. I dropped the key twice but finally managed to wrench the door open. I stumbled in slamming the door. I collapsed on my bed letting the tears rake through me like they had on that fateful day. I curled into a ball feeling so broken that I thought my body would fall apart.

I was still crying when Alice and Rose came in. They wound their arms around me like I had to Rose in the airport when she lost her little sister and was still a flight attendant trying to pay for college like me. They didn't say anything. They let me cry and cry. I was spoiling their new tops but they didn't care. I didn't think I would ever stop. I was in an endless pain that would never be cured.

The man I loved and still did didn't love me. My Edward didn't love me anymore. He wouldn't even look at me.

He's got someone else to love.

Awwwww! Poor Bells! Tell me wot you guys think. It would be much apreciateded! (I think I spelt that wrong! ooooops!)

BigBlackEyes

XOXOXOXOXOX