Chapter 9: Locket

She flipped Lydia's old letter indifferently in her fingers, though the contents of it were of great importance not to her only, but to her entire family.

She did not know what to do.

Mary inspected it with an odd look as if it had some strange disease cast upon it. After a while she left it be and went to sit in her small stool, near the window.

Can Lydia be more confusing? Such a puzzling being… Why did she choose to tell me of Wickham and Prowler? Why…No, she must have decided to tell Kitty or someone from the family, no matter who…it just so happened that that person was me.

Yet why did she want to let someone know? She knew that Prowler would stop helping them if she spilled the beans. Then again, she sent the letter after the incident so she probably saw it fit to tell me since she had broken ties with that man.

But why has she not told everything to mama? Or papa...or even Kitty…why did she decide to bury it for good?

Such thoughts troubled Mary as she leaned her head on the blue curtains.

Lydia's letter lay on her bedside table and she dared not pick it up again.

'Should I let them know?'

Her gaze settled on a sparrow which was flying happily through the garden outside. She followed the bird's trail until she saw a carriage approaching the house.

And what about Kitty? She tells me she wants a man to pay attentions to one woman only and then proclaims that she would not refuse the Colonel's advances, even if married. Such a paradoxical being! Then again, my entire family is like that…there is always a shade of grey in every one of their words.

Her gaze fell upon the carriage and she noticed a man coming out of it.

'The Colonel!' she said shortly and rose to go and meet him.

The entrance Hall seemed deserted, but for the solitary servant who was probably going up to announce Mr. Bingley of the arrival of his guest.

Mary glided down the stairs and arrived at the oak doors just when the gentleman stepped inside, followed by two servants of the house.

She stopped dead.

'Miss Bennet, how lovely to see you so soon,' a deep voice rang in her ears as Mr. Fowler bowed.

'Mr. Fowler,' she said breathlessly and curtseyed.

How could I confuse things so? she wondered as she tried to regain her composure.

'I am equally pleased,' she added at length.

He smiled and remained quiet until Mr. Bingley came down to receive him.

They did not seem the best of friends, but they treated each other amiably enough. Charles welcomed him happily and was delighted to see Mary was already there to meet the guest.

She found out soon enough that he had been invited to dinner and to a game of bridge with Charles and perhaps a game of chess with Mr. Darcy.

Both gentlemen retired to Mr. Bingley's office, thus Mary found excuse to retire as well.

Georgiana was excited to find out about the coming of the neighbour and asked Mary a load of questions concerning the mentioned gentleman, but she couldn't satisfy her with interesting information for she knew not much of him either.

Kitty was scandalized to know he had been invited and Lydia showed an eager interest to meet him as Lizzie had mentioned the words "bachelor" and "good fortune" when the sisters were talking in the drawing room about the coming guests.

Catherine seemed the only young lady displeased, but she was joined by Mr. Prowler in her prattle since neither liked him very much.

That afternoon James opened the stables and led the horses near the river across the domain to let them have a bit of sport. The weather was cold, but the sun glazed the grey grass soothingly as small clouds tumbled across the darkened sky. It did not seem to be any danger of rain and the river floated happily, as if playing a flute number from Mozart.

This picturesque scenery did not go with the rattle of hoofs and long bones as the slender animals grazed what they could find and stumbled upon rocks and quarries, but it served well to impress a young lady like Kitty.

They both descended the hills as each stood by a black horse with brown eyes. The difference was that James' had a white spot near his jaw.

'So beautiful indeed…' she murmured.

'Mm…majestic,' he added.

'Well then, mount old Bonther, he is quite harmless,' he said pointing at her horse.

'I can't…I don't know how and I do not wish to ride now.'

'But you have not gone off learning how to ride, have you?'

'Not one bit, but it's too nostalgic an afternoon, I can only look at the dying nature,' she said nervously

'Dying nature? Surely, I believe it is truly alive, now when about to be torn apart, it rebels against the fury of the winds.'

'Do you mean to say you like the cold seasons, Sir?' Kitty asked incredulous.

'Well, I enjoy winter, but I must say I have a soft spot for autumn.'

'Ah, you are just like Mary and papa, why would you like autumn, Sir?'

'Because, Miss Catherine, the rain is the purest in autumn,' he said silently.

The walked on, talking of trifles and admiring the vast lands opening in front of them.

'Will you be attending the Ball, Mr. Prowler?' she asked suddenly.

'Well, if all goes well and I am not somehow called back to London, I think so.'

'I would be very distraught if you missed it, Sir,' she said sternly

'I share your feelings, for I do not wish to miss your dance, Miss Catherine.'

'Ah, you said so last time as well, but left in such a hurry.'

'I had important business, urgent quite, in London for which I must apologise.'

'I have forgiven you if that is what you seek to know.'

'Indeed, I am now at peace.'

James stopped at length exclaiming with surprise.

'An apple tree! How beautiful and solitary it looks, does it not Miss Catherine?'

Kitty stopped and squinted pensively at it.

'Indeed,' she said looking at her muddy shoes.

'Let us rest a bit by its side,' he proposed.

'No!' she added immediately, 'it's far too late, we must return I think.'

James gave her an odd look but nodded and took her hand to lead her back.

'You are not very fond of apples, I suppose?'

Kitty looked up. 'Oh, I very much enjoy them, but I do not like apple trees.'

The china was shining elegantly in the golden light of the chandelier and the murmur of words floated across the room as everyone came down to dine.

The dining room had taken the role of a festive Hall, Mary believed, for three days now since she had been there, she had not seen so much mirth and enjoyment as in that particular room.

The hierarchy of seats was mind-boggling and confusing as it took a good ten minutes for everyone to be settled, but at last Mary found herself between Georgiana and Lydia.

Mr. Fowler was seated far away from her, next to Mr. Darcy and Lizzie and the only thing she could hear was her mother's booming voice as she sat in her proximity.

From time to time, she would sneak a peek at the gentleman, but he not once looked at her. It was then that Mary returned to her plate, not noticing that in those moments Mr. Fowler glanced fleetingly at her. This odd game continued throughout the dinner, neither noticing the mirth of it.

Georgiana was not talkative and a bit bored as she played with her fork, whilst Lydia was very attentive at every movement around her and asked many things of Mr. Fowler, smiling seductively whenever he chanced to look in her way, for, since she caught every look he would send to Mary, she believed those glances were directed at her.

Mr. Prowler was eating silently in Kitty's proximity, casting odd looks at Mr. Fowler and smiling softy at the young lady next to him.

'I do not trust him,' he murmured when Kitty whispered to him how the man was so pretentious and full of himself.

'And you have no reason to, insolent man,' she replied, infuriated that the entire day Mr. Fowler had not addressed her two words.

Caroline, who sat opposite Mary, decided to speak in order to console the young widow.

'I'm afraid there is not much pleasure, for us, pained ones,' she said.

Lydia looked at her amused.

'Oh, it's been hard, but I do not suppose you could know what it feels like, Miss Bingley, after all, you have not lost a dearly, beloved husband,' she replied emphasising more the fact that she was single, rather than that she knew not the sufferance of a mourner.

Mary managed to refrain from smiling, but Georgiana was not strong enough.

'Oh, Miss Darcy, it is a sad business, nothing happy by nature, I assure you. It may seem pleasant to be alone again, free to pursue some other intricate love, but the pain of losing the first cannot make up for it,' Caroline remarked, eyeing the girl austerely.

Georgiana bit her lips to stop her laughter, but Mary quickly intervened.

'How right you are, Miss Bingley, I am sure Lydia feels very lucky to have your understanding of the matter.'

This reply did not calm Georgiana's mirth, as she was about to burst, when the butler suddenly entered the room.

'Sir, Colonel Fitzwilliam has arrived.'

Mrs. Bennet stopped ranting and looked up at Mr. Darcy and Lizzie as the guests moved uncomfortably in their seats.

Kitty let go of Mr. Prowler's hand for a moment and looked at his face.

'Mr. Fitzwilliam,' she said silently. 'Well, then, our party is getting bigger.'

'Indeed,' James said good-humouredly, but Kitty looked away, pretending to search for her glass of wine.

'You look well, Colonel,' Mary said politely as they sat down in the drawing room where the entire party had retired.

Fitzwilliam looked prim and proper as always, with a lovely handkerchief to guard his chest and sporting snowy lapels. He sat in his chair by the window across Mary who was joined by Georgiana.

Mr. Darcy sat crouched at a chess table opposite Mr. Fowler, both men very much engaged in their game, though Lizzie and Mary would look at them curiously once in a while.

'My brother will surely win, he is not beaten easily,' Georgiana said sweetly as she smiled at Mary.

'Quite right Miss Darcy, I believe no one can beat Darcy easily and he professes to be an amateur only!' the Colonel agreed looking out the window.

Mary knew he was trying to avoid looking at Catherine who was talking across the room with James, Lizzie and Jane, gathered round a cards table. Mr. and Mrs. Bennet had gone to bed earlier than usual, taking Lydia with them who needed rest for the baby and Charles was dozing off by the fireside. This she noticed by surveying the room silently. She too saw how Kitty whispered some amusing trifles in James' ear from time to time and how he played with the ring on her middle finger.

She did not see, however, that Catherine would glance, once in a while in her direction to observe any change in the Colonel. She smiled whenever he shook his head bitterly, looking out into the darkness.

'It seems the winner shall come out soon,' the Colonel said trying to seem highly interested in the game.

And indeed, Mr. Fowler won. Georgiana looked down baffled as Mary only glanced at him in awe.

'Well, a fair win I must say, Sir,' Mr. Darcy said shaking hands with him.

His voice woke Charles from his sleepy reverie and he would have fallen asleep again, had it not been for Jane's hand on his shoulder.

'You look tired, dear, perhaps it's time for bed,' she said sweetly.

'Perhaps,' he admitted smiling.

'Such happy couple I've never seen,' the Colonel said looking at them with a small smile on his face.

Just then his look met Kitty's and they both stood still glancing at each other across the room as Jane and Charles passed them silently, bidding goodnight and wishes of pleasant dreams to everyone.

Their soft steps echoed on the Persian rugs and the spell was broken as Catherine looked away, cutting the invisible strings that tied her to his eyes.

Mary had been watching them amazed and was just about to address the Colonel a few words regarding her sister, when she suddenly heard Lizzie's voice.

'Oh, but you should…I assure you, Mr Fowler, my sister Mary is one of the best players in all Hertfordshire. I believe she would be a most worthy chess opponent.'

Mr. Fowler looked up at her and smirked.

'Is it really so? Well then, I should see for myself if the rumours are true,' he replied eyeing her curiously.

Mary tried not to blush but failed miserably.

Mr. Fowler approached her and bowed at Georgiana.

'It is good to have you here, Sir,' the Colonel responded.

'I am equally pleased,' he added looking at Mary.

'Well then, one of these days you must pay me a visit Miss Bennet. I do not wish to lose an opportunity of having a good opponent.'

He proceeded to talk a bit to Miss Darcy and inquire of her health, but he soon bowed again and left the party as he exited the drawing room with no sign of wanting to say goodbye to anyone.

'That's quite odd. Didn't he already invite Charles and Darcy to join him at his estate tomorrow with the ladies?' the Colonel asked.

'He did,' Georgiana assured him.

Mary remained silent.

Georgiana was brushing her hair at her dressing table as Mary sat on her bed, gazing silently at the late Mrs. Darcy, her nightgown reaching the floor.

'Well, that was a pleasant evening, was it not?'

'Quite so.'

'Oh, come, you seem disturbed.'

'Not even a bit, but this book is rather tedious,' she replied and set it aside.

'Fifteen century writers are all rather dull,' Georgiana remarked eyeing the volume.

'Well I have it from your well stocked library,' Mary replied sarcastically.

'Yes, did I mention my father loved to read such dreary things?' she said amused.

Mary smiled softly.

'Odd fellow this Mr. Fowler, don't you think?' she said out of the blue. 'Was he like this when you met him in summer?'

'Odd? I do not know him to judge but I dare say he has not changed.'

'You seem to be on good terms.'

'Barely…' she murmured.

'You loathe each other then?'

'Of course not. I do not suppose he has something against me,' Mary said. 'But we can hardly be called acquaintances.'

'He seems to have an interest in you.'

'Nonsense,' Mary said as she yawned abruptly, trying to keep her eyes open.

'Still, it was only a stroke of luck that he managed to beat my brother at chess. Lady Catherine praised him greatly for his wit at this game and I dare say that is the only thing we ever agreed on.'

She put her comb aside and tied her hook and eye at the back of her petticoat.

When she turned around she saw Mary sprawled on her bed, fast asleep.

'Ah, poor child,' she said amused. Blowing the candles she crept silently in Mary's room and went to sleep in her bed.

The next morning found Mary strolling peacefully through the garden as the icy air bit her cheeks and played with the hem of her dress.

She was looking over the large poplars into the dull sky and across the reddened hills, imagining she could travel as far as America by picturing herself there, in the middle of the western deserts.

I would like to see those cactuses…

Just then she saw another figure approaching her.

'Kitty, what are you doing here?' she asked.

'Am I not allowed to join you?' she asked coming up to her.

'Certainly, but where is Lydia?'

'Sleeping…poor woman is so listless what with that child in her womb.'

Trust Kitty to be rudely direct about things.

'It can be no easy business…'

'Ah you sound like Caroline.'

'So, you've listened to her anecdotes as well,' Mary said sarcastically.

'More than enough…'

They walked on in silence.

'I came to you last night, but I found Miss Georgiana sleeping in your bed…most disturbing,' she said suddenly.

Mary blushed. 'That is because I had fallen asleep in her room and well…it was my fault for causing such inconvenience.'

Kitty chuckled.

'Well, I am glad you found a friend, Mary, for surely you must get along with her.'

'We are on good terms indeed.'

'That is not to say the Darcy name has anything to do with it…' Kitty continued coldly.

'Why did you come to my room?' Mary asked.

'Oh, nothing…mere trifles,' she said looking away.

'Come now, Catherine…there must have been a reason.'

Kitty looked across the garden, inspecting if there was any unwanted company. At length she spoke.

'I simply wanted to know how you had spent your night.'

Mary smirked. 'That was all?'

'Yes…I had seen you talking to Miss Darcy and Mr. Fowler and…the Colonel as well, quite a chat you had.'

'And you are curious to know what was said?'

Kitty nodded nonchalantly.

'Oh, nothing much, the Colonel seemed to regret having broken off the engagement to Maria, he was out of sorts, probably missed the poor thing,' Mary added slyly.

'Ha! He misses the poor thing…he'll probably find her in a convent…or rather in an asylum where she belongs, mad woman. If he regrets it so he should run off to her immediately.'

'I don't suppose he can do much about it now.'

'So that is why he looked so down in the mouth,' she added angrily.

'What other reason could there be? Could it be because he was vehemently ignored by the likes of you?'

Kitty turned around.

'He loathes me, I can tell.'

'Oh, silly Catherine, you have two men at your knees, begging your encouragement and you play with them both.'

Kitty scowled and said no more.

They were soon joined by Mr. Prowler who was taking out his horse again and Mary was about to leave when Kitty suddenly took hold of her arm and kept her still. Mary gave her a questioning look but she just smiled in his direction.

'Miss Catherine, Miss Bennet,' he bowed politely.

'Mr. Prowler, out with the horse so early?' Catherine inquired.

'It is the best time for him to warm up his stiffened legs. And you ladies, out on an early walk?'

'Quite so, I joined my sister as soon as I saw her strolling around here,' Kitty added shyly loosening her grip on Mary's hand but not letting it go completely.

'But I thought Miss Bennet could not walk two miles,' he said amusedly.

Kitty instantly blushed as Mary gave her a puzzled look.

'I said she could not run two miles, Sir,' she ventured to say, embarrassed.

'I see you have been…praising my outdoor aptitudes,' Mary said ironically.

'Surely, you were not offended Miss Bennet?'

'Not in the least, gathering that it's all very true. It is not the kind of thing I am proud of, but then again I wouldn't be ashamed of it either.'

James smiled sadly at her.

'One of these days you and your sister must join me out for a ride,' he added cheerfully.

'We shall be honoured,' Kitty replied smiling, but Mary only glared at her sister.

'Miss Bennet does not seem happy at the prospect of it,' he said.

Mary looked up.

'But it cannot be helped,' he added eyeing her defiantly.

He soon left them to their solitude, disappearing in the morning mist.

'What was that all about, Kitty?' Mary asked.

'Nothing, I just did not feel up to walking with him alone.'

'And you think with me you're better off?'

'Much better, in fact…' she continued smiling.

'Do not even think about it,' Mary interrupted her bluntly.

'Oh come now, Mary, do it for your dear younger sister who treasures you deeply.'

Mary barely refrained from laughing.

'I shall not ride a horse.'

'I am not asking you to do it, but you must come with me. Mr. Prowler invited both of us.'

'Out of common politeness Kitty, it is obvious he wants to occupy your time only.'

'He will occupy us both, come now, please?'

Mary turned to reflect.

'I would be tempted to go if…'

'Yes?'

'If you changed your attitude towards the Colonel.'

'My attitude? I have no attitude towards…'

'Then why do not you want to be alone with Mr. Prowler?'

'Ah, it is of no importance to you…but very well, I shall be amiable...' she said gloomily.

'Good, then I suppose we have a deal.'

Georgiana watched the two girls from her bedroom window. They would always be good sisters, always have each other, she thought. She did not have a sister. Her brother, whilst kind and gentle to her could not replace one. Mary was her friend, but Kitty seemed to count more and it was rather normal, she considered.

She grasped the locket around her neck. Inside there were two faded yet considerably new pictures; one being a perfect likeness of herself and the other of her brother. He was so handsome, while she was so much plainer.

But the fair Georgiana was wrong. Like any girl of her age, with such fortunes and good situation, she saw herself less than she was, her shyness helping her create an image of mediocrity and dullness around her. The truth was that Miss Darcy was utterly beautiful.

It was not a beauty of appearance necessarily. It was beauty that radiated from inside her and gave her features that tender softening that make Greek goddesses seem human. Her brother had rough featured that, combined with the rest of his stature made him as handsome as ever, but she was a delicate primrose that did not shine blazingly, blinding the admirers, but glowed shyly, waiting to be noticed.

Of course, she never remarked that at herself. Right now her eyes were resting on Mary's dress which was laid on her bed neatly. Mary had forgotten it there last night when she had come in her nightgown with the dress under her arm after that gruelling soiree.

'Pretty dress, but plain…like me,' she said.

'Miss Darcy?'

She looked up to find the maid at the door.

'Mr. Darcy wishes to see you,' she said stiffly.

Georgiana nodded and exited the room.

Mary and Kitty discovered breakfast had been served long ago and had to content themselves with cold eggs and toast, but that did not dampen their spirits, at least not Mary's, since Charles reminded them again that they were to call upon Mr. Fowler, later in the evening.

They ate in silence until Lydia arrived, taking Catherine away with her to help her with her dresses. She seemed tired, but excited at the prospect of visiting the "mysterious gentleman" as she called him. She wanted to look her best and seem as fresh and fair as Jane, for she knew not when such a good match would come her way again.

Mary was a bit put out by all this, but she made sure no one noticed.

'I simply must get rid of these dark circles!' Lydia moaned as she dragged Kitty up the stairs.

Seeing herself alone, Mary went in search for Georgiana, but she could not find her anywhere in the house and her room was locked.

Thinking she should give up and search outside, she stumbled upon Mr. Darcy's study which led to his private chamber. The room was ambiguously sober and elegant, with different collectable items of art and history, but only documents and legal articles adorned the desks.

She blushed deeply and meant to leave immediately, but a high pitched voice which erupted from the chamber made her stop.

It was as if someone was yelling silently, if such a thing was possible. A weak voice that tried to seem powerfully daring.

She knew she shouldn't, but she could not help eavesdropping at the door, for she was certain she knew the voice.

'It is of no importance in any case…Why do you wish to know?'

'I am only asking for your own sake. I am responsible of your welfare and you are but a child,' Mr. Darcy spoke.

'A child older than a pregnant woman. Listen to your words, brother…they deceive you. I…' she went on trying to defeat her fright and timidity.

'I cannot invent something that would please you. I spoke the truth.'

'Then tell me the…'

'I cannot for I do not know it.'

'But surely you would…'

'You suppose wrong.'

'The connection…'

'There is nothing of the kind.'

'Let me speak, Georgiana. You must tell me all you know. This is not a safe business. Do you want to have to go through all the torments you underwent when you were but fifteen?'

'Do not speak of it!' she shrieked shortly.

'How can I not?'

A sob was heard and a small chink that sounded as if something had clasped.

Mary barely had time to recover herself when the door flung open and Georgiana exited furiously, yet still delicately as a primrose.

It was lucky for her that she was hidden behind the door, the young Miss Darcy not having noticed her.

Mr. Darcy sighed sadly and closed the door behind her, locking himself up in his chamber and muttering odd laments.

Mary did not wait for an invitation, but left immediately, following Georgiana.

She eventually found her in the garden sitting on her swing.

'My brother ordered it shortly after the marriage…for the children that would come,' she spoke sadly lifting her forehead to meet Mary's gaze.

'Where have you been?'

'In my room,' she lied.

'Oh, I've been out on a walk with Catherine.'

'Yes I saw.'

'Are you alright Georgiana?'

'I'm quite well, thank you.'

'You seem distressed.'

'Oh, it must be the weather. I never really got along with winter all that much.'

'Yet it's not quite winter. It's December, but the weather is very kind.'

'I never really got along with autumn either.'

Mary chuckled.

'What will you wear tonight?' Georgiana asked curiously.

'A dress I suppose. Showing up stark naked would be my ticket to the asylum.'

Georgiana laughed.

'It is obvious you think nothing of your apparel,' she said getting up. 'Come, let us see what you shall wear.'

Mr. Darcy exited his study as he walked slowly down the hall. He had never meant to upset his sister like this, but he knew he was right. She was very young and naïve…and had taken off the necklace he had given her. The locket lay heavy in his palm as he looked at her likeness and his. The way she had thrown it at the floor pained him deeply. Admittedly, he shouldn't have mentioned Wickham, he knew, but it couldn't be helped.

Reaching her chamber he took out a small key and entered it silently. He guessed well that she would not return to her room.

On her bed lay Mary's dress and Mr. Darcy placed the locket inside the pocket of the gown, folding it carefully.

'She shall find it when she gets dressed,' he mumbled to himself and left the room hurriedly, locking it again.

Mary and Georgiana soon came upstairs and retired to their rooms to rest for a while, but as Miss Darcy wanted to practice on her pianoforte and Mary much wanted to hear her play, Georgiana quickly selected a pretty dress for Miss Bennet to wear that evening.

'It is too elegant for such an occasion,' Mary had insisted, but she wouldn't hear anything of it.

'It is white and blue, quite perfect, I think, now come let us to go my music room.'

Mary took a book with her and was ready to leave when Georgiana's head appeared at the secret door.

'Oh, Mary you left your green dress in my room. It's right here on the bed,' Georgiana added picking it up and handing it to her friend.

'Oh, thank you, I had forgotten all about it indeed. I did mention I was sorry for the inconveniences caused last night, didn't I?'

'This is the tenth time,' she replied but her tone was sad.

Mary wanted to question her more, but she was rushed to the music room.