He couldn't believe he'd let Denmark talk him into this. It sounded so right after all they had been through together. Sort of proof of how close they were. Then, he mentioned all the pros and none of the cons, and he didn't ask what they were. That was the first sign. The second was that he didn't mention who would be joining them. Of course, it was a woman, but he didn't know which. It might have been some high class whore, or maybe one of their fellow nations. He didn't really care, except that Denmark said that she was beautiful, sweet and great in bed. Wrong again to not question it.

It was even worse when he was told up to show up at Denmark's house dressed nice and with flowers. They were all going out to dinner first. Classy, then they could get to business after. A pale navy and black striped suit and a light blue tie, along with a bouquet of flowers for her, even. He brought orchids and some small white flowers he couldn't remember the name of. He knocked and waited. As the door opened, he gulped and held out the bouquet at whoever was opening the door.

"Oh, flowers!" The bouquet was snatched away from him. "You shouldn't have Norge! But you know my national flower's the marguerite daisy, ja?"

He growled at swatted at the Dane.

"They're not for you, idiot."

"But you held them out to me!" He put a hand to his heart in mock pain. "I thought you were nice!"

Before he could retort, Denmark laughed and pulled him in. He stumbled over to the couch and sat while Denmark closed the door and messed with the flowers.

"Jeez, how much did these costs? They look top kroner."

"Well…" he crossed his legs, smoothing out his pants. "They weren't cheap."

"Nor, you don't even know who you're meeting and you get everything all nice and set up! Suck up at its finest, huh?"

"So the girl isn't as nice as I picture her to be? I shouldn't treat her like a lady?"

"I'm just saying," He continued, "that I might have set us up with an ungrateful top class whore who just wants a free dinner and a shower, and you're buying her expensive flowers."

"A top class whore would want money, not a meal and a shower, Danmark."

"Talking from experience?" He waggled his eyebrows at the other, only to be hit square in the face by a pillow. "Okay, okay. I gotcha."

He sank into an armchair, smelling the flowers boredly. Time seemed to tick by slowly as they various positions on the armchair in his boredom, leaving the bouquet abandoned on a nearby coffee table. By the time the doorbell rang, he was upside down in the armchair, each leg resting over an armrest.

"I'll get it!" He struggled to get to his feet, fussing with his suit (no tie) and dress shirt.

Svein simply ignored him and got up, opening the door quickly and quietly.

"Hallo—" He gaped, or at least that's what it would have looked like if he had opened his mouth.

Standing there was a brunette; hair in a sort of intricate bun on the back of her head, clutching a small black purse in front of her lace accentuated black dress. She rocked slightly in her silver flats, until she finally noticed his presence. She smiled. He felt himself sweat.

"S-Shetland."

"Svein, it's so good to see you."

She captured him in a quick, tight hug, having the advantage of being a good foot or so taller. When she let go, Denmark appeared at the door.

"Hej, Cait." He let the 'e' take on a life of its own, extending it and letting it drawl out.

"Niko." She poked his cheek hard. "So you ready to be a gentleman for once in your life, or what?"

"Gentleman! I am such a gentleman that I've got that British bitch beat!"

"I'll believe it when I see it."

"Mhm." He kissed her cheek. "And Nor can vouch for me."

"Svein doesn't tell lies, dumbass."

His head perked up at her mentioning his name.

"And Danmark is full of lies," he added on.

She nodded, smiling. "Are we ready to go now?"

"Just a minute." He ran back to the living room and grabbed up his bouquet, returning to the front door in a few seconds.

Just as Denmark was leaning over her and about to kiss her, he thrust his bouquet in front of her. She took it from him gently as Denmark sputtered. She sniffed them and sighed happily.

"They're beautiful! Thank you, Svein."

"You're welcome." He felt a slight heat rise to his cheeks. "Let's get going, ja?"

"I'll get the car!"Denmarkshouted and ran out the door to bring said vehicle around to the front.

Shetland chuckled and stroked the petals of the flowers lovingly. He stared at her for a minute before talking.

"How did he get you to go along with this?" he asked.

"It wasn't easy," she said. "But, he made a deal with me. That during our 'business' tonight, he'd be a perfect gentleman. That and he'd get me a new car."

"A new car?" His eyes widened. That was big, even for Danmark. "What model?"

"An Alfa Romeo Giulietta. In etna black."

"Etna black?"

"It's a sort of brownish black."

He nodded. He could see Denmark was going all out for this.

"That's really great of him, I suppose."

"Great?" She snorted. "He just wants a threesome, plain and simple. And he knows I'm not as vulgar as he is, so he does all this to win us over."

"Us?"

"Yes, he did something for you to do this, right?"

He thought back. After telling him the details, there was nothing extra Denmark actually had to do for him to agree. Nothing at all.

"Er…a bit." He lied. "Just a few things here and there." He didn't want her to know he was just in it for the possibility of a good looking woman to fuck. No, then he would be grouped with Denmark for sure.

"See? He knows how to bargain for what he really wants, even if it costs him a few shiny kroner."

He simply nodded again, cringing as a car honked its horn obnoxiously loud. They looked to the street. Denmark waved them over and they crossed once there were no cars coming.

…

"No, no!" She giggled, clutching Denmark's shoulders. "You sit! You're wiggling all around!"

"Cait, you're pretty drunk…"

"I'm not…I'm…not drunk! My God. I thought you were a gentleman, Mr. Danish King!"

Norway held his head in his hands as he saw Denmark smirk and pick her up, carrying her to the car. Dinner had gone well, and then they had headed to the restaurant's bar. Of course, with her weak alcohol tolerance, she had gotten drunk first. And badly at that. They decided it was time to go home and start a little earlier than expected when she had tried to tip the bartender with breath mints and gum.

"Niko! We need Svein! Svein, you're so far away!" She cried as Denmark buckled her into the back seat. "I need you!"

"Svein…"Denmark motioned to her with her thumb. "Ya got to keep her preoccupied while I drive or she'll be flailing and shit all over the place."

"Fine."Norway sighed and buckled himself in beside her, taking hold of her hand.

Shetland latched herself onto Norway, snuggling him. He turned red and stroked her hair, murmuring words of comfort in Norwegian. While Denmark drove, she calmed and her alcohol level went down. She was a bit sleepy by the time they arrived back at Denmark's house. Denmark parked and carried her into the house while Norway locked up the car, then locked the front door of the house behind him. He followed the sound of their voices upstairs and into the master bedroom ,or as Denmark liked to call it, "The King's Chambers."

When he opened the door, he found her to be splayed on the bed while the Dane busied himself with undressing. He rolled his eyes and sat by the woman. She smiled up at him through pink tinted lips and pulled him down for a kiss. The Dane complained until she yanked him down by the arm, uniting all three in a mess of kisses that were almost bruising.

Norway didn't know when he started to loose his clothes, nor did he care. He also didn't know when she had started taking control and had reduced them to sweating, teary eyed, pretty boys.

And he frankly didn't care.