Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. The rights to those characters and to the show belong to the creators of the show, to CBS, The Sullivan Company and to A&E.

The Places to Love

Chapter Sixteen

A pale sliver of moon appeared in the sky, shining weakly in the windows above their bed. Sully's breathing was still erratic as he clutched Michaela tightly to his chest. He had no clue why she had been quite so aggressive tonight, practically dragging him to bed as soon as dinner was over. Of course he didn't mind and he needed her close right now, needed to feel her love deeply. Raising her head, she placed her chin against his chest to look up at him. "How was that?" she asked coyly flipping her hair to the other side of her head.

Sully's hands wandered down her back settling against her bottom. "I've…. You've…." He simply smiled when it seemed he couldn't put a coherent sentence together.

"I'm going to take speechless as a good sign."

"Very good," he managed loosening his grip so that she could move to the side. "I'll be right back." He stood and disappeared into the bathroom but was back within a moment. "How long do we need to wait still before we can stop being careful?"

"One more cycle," she said with a smile as she patted the bed inviting him back nonverbally.

Sully was only too happy to snuggle up beside her. "So what was that all about?"

Michaela kept her eyes cast downward. "Why does it have to be about something? Can't I make love to my husband?"

"I'm not complaining but you were rather…" He fumbled for the right word, not wanting to embarrass her. "Possessed."

A light sigh escaped her mouth as she hooked her leg over his, laying her head on his chest. Sully had told her all about Max during dinner but Michaela had yet to tell him about the hospital. "I had a hard day as well," she whispered, letting her fingers tangle in the hair on his chest.

Sully's hands which were gently stroking her back now gripped her. "Why didn't you tell me?" She shrugged, unsure why she hadn't said something before now. Pressing a kiss to her hairline, he spoke. "Tell me."

"We have a baby in the NICU who is two months early with severe complications."

"Mmm-hmm." Sully made the slight noise to let her know he was listening. So far this wasn't that unusual.

"Her mother is an addict…. The baby's complications are because of her mother's drug use."

"You've dealt with that before."

"I know but this time, this time I just can't. I can't face the mother. I'm so angry at her. She should have protected her baby." Sully could hear the emotion in her voice and he tried to soothe her. It all made sense now. He hadn't even considered that the miscarriage would have repercussions like this but he should have.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as Michaela lifted her head to look up at him.

"I just keep thinking what if I can never have a child… it's not fair."

"It's not," Sully agreed.

"How can God let that be so?"

Sully knew she was struggling and he wanted to help but it was a hard question to answer. "We got free will Michaela. He let's us make our own decisions. Don't ya think? I mean would ya want it any other way?" Michaela shook her head no and laid her cheek back against Sully's chest. "Sides we only been married for a little while. I don't think we need to worry yet about you not getting pregnant. I mean the first time it happened rather quickly."

"True," she acquiesced but felt unable to shake the fear inside of her.

Sensing that she was still worried, Sully gently rubbed her back as he spoke. "And if we can't have our own, we'll adopt."

"You wouldn't be … disappointed?" She turned her head slightly to see his face in the shadow of the moon.

"Disappointed?" Sully chuckled. "'Chaela you aren't going to disappoint me. I never expected to find love again and now…" He took a deep breath unsure how to even begin to tell her what he felt inside.

"But I know how much you want a family."

Sully pulled her up and then framed her face with his hands, looking deep into her eyes. "You are my family, anyone else is just a bonus." A smile, weak at first but growing, spread over Michaela's face. Sully loosened his hold and she bent to kiss his lips. "Next time ya feel this way, I want ya to tell me right off."

Michaela nodded as she moved to lie back against him. "So you don't want me to just attack you?"

"Oh you can still do that." They both laughed but then quieted, each thinking about the particular situations they faced. After a few moments had passed, Sully stirred a little. "What are you thinking about?"

"How I'm going to talk to that mother. I just don't feel any compassion."

Sully nodded. "I know what you mean. Sometimes I feel horrible for Kat and sometimes I wish she'd never come back into my life."

"I don't understand it… I mean we are both usually so compassionate."

"Yeah, but these situations cut close to home for both of us. Lot of hurt involved no matter how ya look at it. I figure it ain't gone though. Kind of like when a shadow falls over the moon – you know it's still there even if it's hidden for awhile."

"I hope the shadow passes soon," Michaela whispered closing her eyes and yawning.

Sully slid down to be on her level. "It will," he assured her telling her good night with one last kiss.

Slipping down the corridor toward Michaela's office, Sully nodded to a few of the doctors he recognized. The house had passed its final inspection and he had the cleaning crew in now, readying their house for habitation. With everything that had occurred the night before, Sully had neglected to tell her this bit of good news. Somehow the bad had overshadowed it. Yet he thought this bit of news might be just the thing to lift her spirits. He stopped and knocked on her office door and then tried the handle only to find it locked.

Looking around the hall, he wondered where she was; knowing she normally took lunch time during this time. He decided to try the NICU, assuming he would be able to look through the nursery glass and see her. With a hurried pace, he made his way back to the elevators and then down to the third floor. He stood at the edge of the glass, watching her for a moment. In her arms, she held a baby hooked to several machines and for a moment Sully flashed back to the first time he held Hannah. A nervous looking young woman stood nearby, her eyes swollen from crying. Michaela spoke to her and she sat down in the rocking chair. Within another minute, Michaela placed the child in her arms, speaking words of instruction.

Sully had a good idea that this was the woman she'd spoken of last night and he knew this was a big step for her. A man nearby looked over at him. "Which one is yours?"

With a light chuckle, he pointed through the regular nursery to the NICU. "The big one beside the rocking chair." For a moment the man looked confused but Sully quickly amended his previous statement. "I'm waiting for my wife. She's the doctor."

"Oh, Dr. Quinn?" Sully nodded. "That is who I am waiting for as well. I'm Dr. Burke – Dr. William Burke. We were in medical school together."

Sully offered him his hand. "Nice to meet ya. Michaela never said anything…"

"She didn't know," William interrupted. "I am here on vacation and remembered that she worked somewhere in Colorado Springs. After making a few calls, I located her this morning and asked if she would be free for lunch."

At that moment, Michaela arrived in the hall and both men turned to look at her. "Sully," she said with a wide grin. "What are you doing here?"

"Just thought I'd surprise my wife."

She looked over at William and laughed. "Seems like the day for surprises." Sully followed her gaze, slightly unnerved by what he saw in William's eyes. He knew that look and the feeling that accompanied it. It was the same faraway look he'd had for the time they'd been only friends while he secretly wished for so much more. Sully did not have to read his thoughts - he knew just by looking at him that Dr. William Burke was in love with his wife.