Chapter II: Starting Over

A/N: Sorry if this is short and/or sloppy. I rushed it because I will be busy for awhile so I wanted to get this posted beforehand. I'll clean it up and maybe lengthen it when I get the time.

(General POV)

Ben had quickly told Margaret that he would get his driver to run Amy and him to get John and then meet her at the hospital, Margaret thanked them and left quickly while still on the phone with Sanjay. Amy had to be led to the car by Ben; she was almost in shock as she sat there quietly trying to wrap her head around the news.

Ben was calling his father to tell him the news and turned to Amy "should you call your parents and tell them?"

Amy just nodded dumbly pulling out her cellphone, her mother picked up on the third ring "Hello Amy" her mother's annoyed voice came "I'm kind of busy at work, did you need something."

Amy didn't know the right way to tell her mother about Ricky so it spewed out all at once "Ricky didn't pick up John, I got a phone call from the daycare but Ricky's foster mom was over at the house talking to me and she got a phone call that he's in the hospital."

Anne stayed quiet for a long time then coughed lightly "Ricky's in the hospital? Slow down what happened!"

Amy's eyes began to moisten with unshed tears "I don't know… His mom came over to talk to me and said he's been working a lot and hasn't had any sleep, but I don't know what happened yet."

(Margaret POV)

I have been through a lot in my life, I started taking in foster kids when I found I couldn't have children of my own, which was a sad experience in of itself. But news of Ricky being in the hospital was one of the worst experiences of my life.

I stood with my husband quietly waiting news on my 'son', ever since I got to the hospital things were a whirlwind of activity. No one seemed to be able to be able to tell me how Ricky was doing, the only thing we knew is that he was in a car accident and was in the TICU.

It wasn't until half an hour later that one of the doctors came out to tell us they were still working on him, he gave us a brief overview of what Ricky's injuries were. He told is he had friction burns from the airbags, lacerations from the glass and twisted metal, a broken left leg and fractured left arm, and head trauma. They were currently checking for internal injuries and keeping him stabilized. He asked a few questions about Ricky's condition recently commenting on the fact he looked to have slight malnutrition and sleep deprivation.

I told him what I could and as he walked away, I fell back into the seat beside me as the tears came heavily. I should have helped him more, I should have been able to talk him out of working so hard, I felt so guilty even though I knew I wasn't at fault.

Amy came about twenty minutes later holding John tearfully; her boyfriend, Ben I believe, had his arm around her trying to comfort her but she didn't seem to notice. It wasn't long before more people began arriving, in the back of my head I was wondering how the news traveled so fast.

I was brought out of my thoughts when Grace Bowman came up to me glancing at my name tag, I guess to make sure she got my name right "I'm sorry to hear about Ricky, Mrs. Shakur, I'll be praying for him."

I nodded numbly as more well-wishers came up offering their support; Sanjay saw I didn't want to talk so he did the talking for me.

(Adrian POV)

My heart was heavy as I ran into the waiting room, Ricky and I were in a dry spell right now but I still loved him. We were just taking a break from the constant fighting. But now I regretted it, what if he died? I should have stuck by his side and helped him instead of fighting about sex but I was so stubborn. When I rounded the corner and saw his foster mom crying so much it made it seem so much worse.

I felt the tears prick my eyes, I couldn't lose Ricky, I just couldn't.

Grace spotted me and walked up pulling me into a hug knowingly, her own eyes had unshed tears and as her warm arms encircled me I couldn't hold it any longer and sobbed into her shoulder.

"It's ok let it out Adrian" she said to me rubbing my back "we're all praying for him."

Through my bleary eyes I saw Amy sitting in a chair rocking herself while she held John; she stared into space with a dead look in her eyes.

"Have you heard anything?" I asked grace after I was able to compose myself.

She shook her head "not much I talked to Ricky's foster dad and he said it was a car accident and he's in the TICU right now."

I nodded sadly and Grace produced a tissue from her pocket which I accepted easily.

My father showed up soon afterwards, my mother was away at work, I latched onto him when he arrived "daddy!" I cried pitifully feeling like a little girl.

(General POV)

About forty-five minutes later an older doctor came into the room, looking at his clip bored he looked back up "Mr. and Mrs. Shakur?"

Everyone in the room looked up at that, Amy's parents had arrived along with her and Ben's friends. Margaret and Sanjay stood hopefully "yes?"

When they moved closer the doctor smiled slightly "Ricky is out of critical condition, he'll live."

The room all let out a breath of relief, letting smiles grace their saddened faces. The doctor sighed "he's still unconscious but in a few minutes after he's moved into a new room he'll be allowed visitors."

Margaret was crying as she hugged Sanjay tightly "thank god!"

"As soon as he regains consciousness we'll give him a checkup, try to keep the visitors to two or three at a time" he then pulled some papers off his clipboard "I'll need you to fill out some more paperwork, and I'll have a nurse come show you to his room when it's ready."

"Thank you, thank you so much" Sanjay said shaking the man's hand vigorously.

When the doctor was gone, Amy approached Margaret cautiously still hugging John "c-could I… I mean when you go in… John I mean…"

Margaret nodded "you can come in with us, I'm sure Ricky would want his son to see he's ok."

Amy still couldn't smile first everything she learned earlier had just turned her life upside down, and then almost losing Ricky, she was barely keeping it together. She had to see him.

Ashley sat in the corner by her father and mother, the two talked in respite after hearing the good news and held hands. Ashley didn't feel good though, sure she was glad Ricky was ok, but she felt horrible as a friend.

She and Ricky texted each other all the time, but she never checked if he was ok she always thought he would tell her when he was ready if he needed. But then something like this happens and shows you maybe you can't always wait for the other person, sometimes you have to act first.

Everyone was talking quietly amongst themselves when a small nurse probably near her fifties walked into the room and looked around "Underwood?" everyone nodded and the nurse smiled "well I can take three of you to see him at a time."

Margaret practically pulled Sanjay forward as Amy came up next to them "We'll go first and his son, I hope you don't mind."

The nurse looked at the baby slightly surprised but remained smiling "that's fine, follow me."

The walk to his room was quiet and the nurse stopped at the door after opening letting them to go in to be alone with their family.

(Amy POV)

I don't know what I was expecting when I was coming in but it wasn't what I saw.

My poor, poor Ricky.

He looked so horrible. His leg was in a cast raised slightly from the bed, it smelled like they just put it on a few minutes ago. His face was bandaged mostly on the left side, as was his head. His left arm was bandaged or in a cast I couldn't tell from where I stood. A sob escaped my throat as I looked at his thin body and dark circles under his right eye, the left was covered.

His face was slightly swollen and he had bandaged on his right arm and he had tubes running out of his body in various places. He looked so small and fragile in that bed.

Tears came to my eyes as I cradled my infant son carefully, the soft beeping of machines seemed to be lulling John to sleep and I was glad he wasn't old enough to understand what was happening.

Margaret and her husband stood at the foot of the bed hugging and talking to Ricky and thanking god, but I… I just felt guilt like none other I had before. I had heard Sanjay talking to my dad and Ruben earlier "so he's been working that hard?" my father had asked.

Sanjay nodded and told them about Ricky's three jobs and how hard he was pushing himself lately "I just feel like it's partially my fault, I should have tried harder to talk him out of workings so much, but he was so adamant about it I let him continue…"

They had all talked about the accident and Ruben said he had a friend who had studied the effects of sleep deprivation "… no it's called Microsleeps… they occur when a person has a significant sleep deprivation. The brain automatically shuts down, falling into a sleep state for a period that can last 10 to 60 seconds. The person mentally falls asleep no matter what activity he or she is engaged in. Microsleeps are similar to blackouts and a person experiencing them is not consciously aware that they are occurring."

I had heard more but that part stuck in my head the most; he was so sleep deprived providing for our son that his brain had forced itself to shut down. All I could think of was all the times I spent doing nothing all day with Ben but sitting on the couch watching TV, and sleeping peacefully at night after checking on John.

I walked up to his bed side and carefully put my hand on his as the tears streamed down my face "Ricky… oh Ricky I'm so sorry…"

I didn't notice Margaret nod to Sanjay to leave so I could have a moment with Ricky alone; I swallowed the lump in my throat "I'm such a horrible person. I had no idea what you were going through, and I didn't care enough about anything but what I was going to do for fun with my friends… I just know you must blame me, if I had kept my job and helped you, you wouldn't have worked three jobs…"

I tightened my hand on his "…once your better I'll help more often, I'll be good mother to John… I can't lose you."

(General POV)

Everyone visited the sleeping boy and Adrian had refused to leave the boys side and after much debating her father let her stay.

It had been one week now and the doctors had informed them Ricky was in a mild coma induced by the head trauma most likely. Amy came with John every day and apologized and talked to him about all the things she had took for granted. She was taking care of John full time and was realizing how hard it was and she didn't have a job let alone three.

Leo had told the Shakur's he would help with medical expenses or anything else they needed and Ben had offered to take over Ricky's job at the butcher shop to help out Amy and John. Things were rough, John seemed to know Ricky was gone and Amy had trouble getting him to sleep or stop fussing. She often found herself begging for Ricky to wake up and help her, to no avail.

Adrian was at Ricky's side every day after school along with Grace, the blonde Christian prayed for Ricky and Adrian found herself silently doing the same. Ben only came when he was with Amy, hating the fact that Amy was so distraught but feeling guilty about it because of Ricky's current state.

The end of the week came and the nurse had come in to get Adrian to leave because visiting hours were over, only for the girl to ignore her when the boy in the hospital bed coughed and tried to open his eyes "Ricky!" she cried.

The nurse called for the doctor as Ricky was awakening, he coughed again as his eyes adjusted and opened fully. Adrian was holding his hand when the doctor came in, checking his vitals then looking at him "can you hear me?"

Ricky tried to say something but just coughed so he nodded while Adrian began pouring him some water, the doctor smiled "how are you feeling?"

"Like I was run over" he said after taking a drink.

Adrian didn't miss the glances Ricky was sending her way but she couldn't make out what the look he was giving her.

The doctor nodded and pulled out his pen light checking Ricky's eyes then asking him to follow the light "that's very good."

Ricky finally spoke again "Where am I?"

The doctor told him was in the hospital "what's the last thing you remember?"

"I don't know" Ricky said.

The doctor stopped "what do you mean?"

Ricky looked like he was thinking "I can't remember anything… just a dream I had…"

The doctor looked concerned "do you know your name?"

Ricky racked his brain again and Adrian felt tears in her eyes as he shook his head no, she recognized the look he had given her, he didn't know her… at all.