Chapter III: Salvaging Life

A/N: Got random inspiration to write this chapter on my laptop while i was out and about. so here you go, hope you like.

(Ricky POV)

The confusion set in ten times worse after I shook my head… what was my name? The girl who had stood next to me had called out Ricky when I woke up. I could remember how to talk, but not how I learned to. I knew about writing and could probably do so, but not how or where I learned it. I knew I could do all sorts of things, simple things, everyday things… but so much more eluded me.

The doctor had left to call my parents… I just wish I knew who they were. The girl who was here before was standing by the window; she seemed to be crying as she talked quietly on the phone.

Who was she? A sister, a friend, a girlfriend? It was all too confusing.

The doctor was taking too long to come back, giving me time to think, and the more I thought the more stressed I became.

When the doctor came back in he had another man with him, and they began to ask questions.

(General POV)

Margaret and Sanjay had arrived as quickly as they could after the call, the doctor had stopped them outside Ricky's room though "Mr. and Mrs. Shakur, before you see Ricky… I have some important news."

The pair braced themselves as the doctor sighed "Ricky has awoken and is currently talking with a Neurologist who has dealt with amnesia…"

"Amnesia!" Sanjay said worriedly.

The doctor nodded "so far after a checkup and a few questions from myself and the Neurologist, Ricky seems to have a form of amnesia."

The parents digested the information slowly; the doctor gave them a minute before continuing "so far it seems to be retrograde amnesia… he doesn't remember anything before the accident. To him his entire life started today."

Margaret began to cry as Sanjay stood firm "will he remember us… I mean regain his memories of us?"

Before the doctor could respond a younger man stepped from Ricky's room, the doctor nodded to him and he remained stoic "Mr. and Mrs. Shakur I'm Dr. Dennis Tramo, Neurology Specialist. I specialize mostly in Behavioral Neurology/Dementia, Aphasia, and Memory Disorders. From the preliminary tests and questions, it seems Ricky has retrograde amnesia which is a form of amnesia where someone is unable to recall events that occurred before the development of the amnesia. The term is used to categorize patterns of symptoms, rather than to indicate a particular cause or etiology."

He pushed his glasses up his nose "A person who has suffered this injury will often feel as if the time (1–4 hours) before the injury were a dream. If someone informs the injured person of the events just before the trauma, they will most likely recollect some of the happenings."

The Shakur's remained silent as he continued "The memory loss may just affect specific "classes" of memory. For example, the victim, a concert pianist before, may still remember what a piano is after the onset of retrograde amnesia, but may forget how to play. The relearning rate for often used skills such as typing and math is typically faster than if they had never learned it before. While there is no cure for retrograde amnesia, "jogging" the victim's memory by exposing them to significant articles from their past will speed the rate of recall."

"So, we should try and jog his memory? Show him photos and tell him of his life" Margaret asked through misty eyes.

Dr. Tramo sighed softly "The victim of retrograde amnesia may feel embarrassed or stressed that they no longer remember key people and significant events. Typically the victim may be overwhelmed by the rush of well-wishers who seek to reacquaint themselves. It is important to let the amnesic go at his or her 'own pace,' so they are not overly stressed. Forgotten relations forget that they are effectively meeting the victim for the "first time" and may make the victim uncomfortable through displays of friendship such as kissing or slapping on the back that, while appropriate for longtime relationships, are not appropriate for "first time" meetings."

Dr. Tramo wasn't known for his people skills as he gave them text book definitions and explanations, but the Shakur's took it in stride, opening his clipboard he nodded to himself "it says here Ricky is already seeing a psychiatrist it would probably be best to let him know of this and for Ricky to continue to see him after he has eased back into his life. And for now immediate family should reacquaint themselves slowly."

Amy seemed to materialize out of nowhere "I took a taxi and got here as soon as I heard. Can I see him?"

Margaret looked at her and John "Amy we need to talk first before we go in."

(Ricky's POV)

The girl by the window had been asked to leave when I began talking to Dr. Tramo alone. After questioning and relearning my name, I was left alone with my thoughts but I could hear murmurs in the hallway.

The good doctor had told me of my condition and how I got to be here, and had prepped me for meeting my family members… whoever they were.

I don't know how long I was thinking but was brought out of it by a soft woman's voice calling my name "Ricky?"

I looked up seeing a gentle looking, dark skinned woman smiling sadly at me. I wasn't sure who she was or what to say yet so remained quiet.

She looked down for a second then back at me "this is so hard… I guess I should introduce myself" I saw her holding back her tears "my name is Margaret Shakur, your foster mother."

She cautiously placed her hand on mine; I swallowed a lump of frustration that I couldn't remember the emotional woman before me "hello" I said quietly.

I listened as she asked me how I was doing, how I felt and if I remembered anything. After noticing her questions were not helping my mood she showed me a few pictures of her, her husband and I.

Her husband came in and introduced himself as Sanjay my foster father and told Margaret the doctor wanted to talk to them again.

I thought I was going to have time to rest but after they left a young skinny girl with long brown hair entered holding an infant in her arms "Hello Ricky."

I could tell she had been crying and my mind ached with trying to recall her but it was to no avail, she wiped her eyes "your mom and dad told me about you… not remembering…"

She stepped closer to me and looked at the baby "do… do you remember him?"

I thought for a second before shaking my head sadly, and then felt frustrated and guilty as she began crying again.

I felt her free hand take mine "my name is Amy, Amy Juergens…" she squeezed my hand and choked back a sob "this is John Juergens" pausing for a brief second she then added "Underwood. Our son."

My emotions, which were already taking a toll on me, flooded me with a sadness that was new and completely unwelcome "I can't remember my own son…" I whispered.

I didn't notice the tears sliding down my face as I looked at Amy and our son, she was crying too and I didn't know how to react to my emotions or hers.

(Adrian POV)

I sighed to myself as I drove back to my house after being asked to leave the hospital for a while, I should have at least tried to talk to Ricky. But now I had to wait until 'immediate family' visited him and he was deemed fit enough to receive friends.

I gripped my steering wheel tightly at the thought that Amy was probably gonna be able to see him because of John. I growled to myself for my stupidity.

Jealousy at a time like this? When Ricky can't even remember me let alone probably Amy… and John. Now I felt depressed again, I needed to talk to someone before I did something stupid like start a fight with Amy next time I saw her.

Flipping open my phone I dialed Grace's number "Hey Adrian, sorry I couldn't make it to the hospital today. Everything ok there?"

I sighed "Grace… Ricky woke up…"

"That's great!" she exclaimed "I'll come over as soon as I can."

"No there's no point, only immediate family can see him… I got kicked out" I felt the tears I thought were all dried up return "Grace… R-Ricky uh he… he has amnesia."

"Amnesia!" she asked "how?"

"I don't know" I said, did she think I was a doctor? "I just learned of it and called and told my dad before they made me leave."

"Did you want to come over?" she asked me softly and I kind of did, but I wanted to talk to my dad, besides I was almost home.

"Grace can I maybe come by later?" I asked "I want to talk to my dad first."

"Sure, I'm here whenever you need me."

"Thanks, I call you later bye."

"Bye."

As I pulled up to my house I saw Ben's driver parked in front of Amy's house, while the sausage prince himself was knocking on her door. I cut off my engine after parking and get out before cutting across my lawn towards the Juergens "She's probably not there" I say making him jump.

He turns and sees me "What do you mean?"

"Ricky woke up" I stated simply and watched the obvious emotions play out across his face before he calmed down.

"So what are you doing home?" he asked.

"Only immediate family can see him" I stated sadly "She goes there every day so I'm sure she's there with John after the call went out that Ricky was awake."

Ben glanced at the driveway noticing Amy's parent's cars were gone, and no one had answered the door since he had been knocking the last couple of minutes before I got there. He looked back at me and I sighed knowing he was going to go to the hospital anyway; I didn't care the more time he was with Amy the less time she would be with Ricky…

Ugh stupid jealousy.

(Amy POV)

I didn't know how to categorize all the emotions I was feeling as I cried and held Ricky's hand, I had been told not to overwhelm him with Information. But he had looked so sad after he didn't recognize John I just wanted to make him remember but I knew I couldn't, looking at John nestled in the crook of my arm and back to Ricky I swallowed and pulled my hand back "d-do you want to uh hold him?"

His tear streaked cheeks curved slightly as he tried to smile and nodded slowly, carefully handing him his son I had to choke back yet another sob as I saw him look at our son with the same love he had the first time he held him.

"How old is he?" he asked me still looking at John.

"He'll be six months old in two days" I responded.

Ricky was finally able to smile fully as John cooed softly and tried to grab his finger, and that made me smile. I was so caught up in the moment that I had tried to hug Ricky lopsidedly, I don't know what made me do that, but he had turned at my movement and our lips connected.

I froze in shock, it wasn't a super-mind-blowing-instantly-in-love kind of kiss, it was awkward and I pulled back slowly. I didn't even think to tell him we weren't together; I didn't know if I should… he had so much on his shoulders already.

I then noticed he was blushing, actually blushing. Never thought I would see the day.

Then I realized that was his first kiss… well not technically but the first he could remember.

He smiled up at me shyly "sorry" he murmured and I couldn't help my own blush or shy smile.

It had been over a year since I had kissed him, and all though that was awkward I was glad that it happened. Ben.

Dammit I just had to think of Ben.

I shook my head getting that thought out of there for the moment and grabbed Ricky's hand "its ok."

He shook his head his smile dropping "no it's not… I can't remember anything, it's so frustrating… you and John must be so important to me but I can't remember."

I knew I was being stupid, sure I had always liked Ricky and this might be taking advantage of the situation, but I couldn't stop myself from acting.

I leaned in and kissed him again this time he kissed back, probably hoping it would help him remember but I didn't care. I was just glad he kissed back. When we pulled back I smiled "I'm here for you, I'll always be here for you."

"Thank you" he said. I felt slightly guilty not correcting his assumption on our relationship but he was so nice now, it was the Ricky I had always wanted him to be.

I took John back just as the door was opening "Amy" I turned to see Margaret "Ben is here for you."

Crap. Can't let Ricky know about him yet, turning to Ricky I smiled "that's my ride; I'll come see you tomorrow."

"Ok" he said to me and smiled, making me notice he hadn't smirked once since I had been there, he had been smiling truly and that made me smile as I waved goodbye.

Walking out into the hall and toward the waiting room I saw Ben pacing and of course I felt reality set in, I was with Ben not Ricky. I couldn't break up with him, he had been so good to me, and I did like him… just not as much as I had Ricky. Now with Ricky's new attitude I thought there might be a chance for us to be together… but I couldn't hurt Ben, so I wasn't sure what to do.

"Hi Ben" I said catching his attention.

"Amy" he said smiling at me.

"Why are you here?" I asked curiously.

"I heard Ricky was up" he said and left it at that.

I knew why he was really here he was jealous of Ricky, because I had sex and had a kid with the drummer. I just wasn't ready to have sex with Ben, that didn't mean he didn't try. But that left a rift between us when it came to Ricky; he always thought he had to compete with Ricky.

Sadly the thought crossed my mind to have sex with Ben and break up with him, like a consolation prize? I shook my head, there was no way I would do that, besides it might make Ben more attached to me and I was trying to think of ways of breaking it off with him without hurting him.

"Yeah but it's only immediate family that can see him, I took John in already, want to give me a ride?" I asked trying to avoid talk of Ricky for now.

"Sure come on" he said kissing my cheek and taking my hand after grabbing the car seat and diaper bag next to Sanjay who was filling out more papers.

(General POV)

Ashley lay on her bed in the garage glaring angrily at her phone, like it was at fault for her seemingly failed friendship with Ricky. Throwing her phone into her pillows she stared up at the ceiling. She had just started high school and had a total of two friends. Griffin and Ricky.

She had only talked to Ricky over the phone, or texted him. She had noticed his absence from school but said nothing to anyone or to the boy himself. His texts and calls became less frequent and she had assumed he would tell her when he was ready and had gone on with her life.

Holding back tears, she rolled over and picked her phone back up.

She wasn't at fault, but it felt like that. She had been close to him. They had stayed up late into the night talking, and he had told her things which he said he didn't even tell his therapist. She flipped her phone open after a few moments and quickly began texting.

I'm Sorry.

She was about to close her phone when it vibrated she almost thought she got a text back but then saw the screen "Message Not Received."

A tear escaped her eye but she wiped it quickly when her phone vibrated again, with Amy's name appearing on the screen.

She answered and put it to her ear "yeah?"

She listened as her sister told her Ricky was awake, and Ashley felt her heart lighten. But Amy still sounded somber and Ashley figured it out as Amy explained what was wrong with Ricky making her heart drop to the pit of her stomach.

Ashley pulled the phone from her ear and threw it across the room this time making contact with a wall where the phone broke "Amnesia!" she cried, it was like losing her friend for a second time "he can't remember me…"

She didn't even know why she felt as strongly as she did, at least not yet. She rolled over into the pillows to muffle her cries.