Disclaimer: See all other chapters. I don't own Harry Potter.
A/N: This is the first chapter I've actually written in a while. All the others were written several months ago, and I've just been rereading and revising and planning out things. This chapters was kind of a big roadblock for me, because I really do want Harry to make it to Hogwarts at some point soon…like next chapter…but there's a lot going on for him right now. I mean, he had all of August at Grimmauld Place. I just didn't want to gloss over all of it. By the way, I'll respond to reviewers in chapter 20. I just want to get this finished and posted sometime. –Miss Laine
0000000000 Chapter 19: More (or less) Visions and More Potions 0000000000000
Snape didn't even look at him that evening, when he arrived just after dinner. Harry went on with cleaning up the table by hand, so bored with having to lounge around Grimmauld Place all day that he was willing to do just about anything to avoid sitting around reading. Especially if the only thing he had to read was his backlog of letters.
Harry forced himself to keep the small smile off of his face. For once, he couldn't wait for the impending Occlumency lesson. He knew the secret now. He knew how to keep his mind his own.
And Snape was going to find that out.
Again, he had to force the half-smirk off of his face.
"Want a hand there, Harry?" Remus asked. Harry looked up and smiled briefly, feeling much more at ease with Remus now that they had really sat down and talked.
"Sure," he said, and the dishes in his hands disappeared. Remus grinned.
"Magic makes chores a lot easier, don't you think?"
"Only if you are allowed to do magic," he pointed out. Remus smiled.
"Well, that's what I'm here for," he said easily. "Flick of the wand, and then there's no chores to do."
Harry opened his mouth to respond, happy to be involved in a rather pointless conversation, but an irritated Snape cut in.
"Enough!" he said. "Let's get this blasted lesson over!"
Remus's eyes narrowed, but Harry shook his head, hoping Remus understood. The werewolf didn't say anything, so Harry supposed that he had. "All right," he said aloud. "In the den, as usual?" he asked.
Snape just growled slightly in reply, and Harry shrugged and followed after the billowing black robes, Remus just behind him.
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Harry barely made it in the door before Snape whirled on him. "Legillimens!" he snapped.
But Harry was ready. He felt alive and strong, safe in the knowledge that he had Remus and his friends on his side, no matter what, and he had already focused all of energy not on making his mind blank, but rather on filling it up with everything else.
He felt the spell connect, but it seemed to have less impact than usual. A memory started to replay vaguely…it looked like Dudley punching him, perhaps…but it was out of focus.
Harry thought hard on how if he'd grown up with parents, he would have never had to live like that, and the pain and grief that he felt for his dead parents seemed to swell within his heart, forming a painful ache deep in his chest.
And he stood, facing Snape, and smiled. "Was that any better?" he asked.
Snape's eyes narrowed. "What did you do?" he demanded. Harry smiled.
"Did it work like it was supposed to?" he countered. Snape looked ready to shout at him, but the man swallowed once and took a step back.
"It was better," Snape grudgingly admitted. Harry smiled broader, enjoying this.
"Better, as in it worked, or better as in it worked really well?" he pressed. Harry could see Snape's jaw clench.
"It was better, Potter, and you had better leave it at that!" Snape snapped. Harry nodded, grin fading.
"Good," he said. "I wouldn't want to find out that I'm going to have to do this over and over for the rest of the summer, just because you won't admit that I've figured Occlumency out."
Snape glared at him, but Harry stared back, unafraid.
Well, almost completely unafraid. Somewhere in the back of his mind, there was a little worry, a seed of doubt. A fear that Snape might see fit to uncover a few of his less than pleasant memories in front of others, just to get back at him. But he felt hopeful that Snape wouldn't do that.
After all, he'd never told Ron or Hermione about what he'd seen in Snape's penseive. Snape knew that. Snape had no right to use anything he'd seen against Harry.
"Legillimens," Snape said coldly.
Harry braced, forcing his thoughts onto Remus and the night that Remus had let him cry on the floor and had comforted him as only a parent could.
He didn't even see what Snape was looking for. It was as if the memories could not even be pulled from his mind anymore, and he stared at Snape defiantly, sure a small smirk was on his face.
"I will test you again tomorrow," Snape snapped at him, and Harry smiled a little more. Snape had had to admit defeat. He couldn't break into Harry's mind any more.
"All right," Harry said levelly, trying not to instigate a full-blown fight with Snape. "Now what?"
"I have a different version of the potion to administer," Snape said, and Harry wanted to laugh at the anger evident in the greasy man's voice. "You have ten minutes."
Harry nodded. "Just so you know, professor, your last potion really didn't work out too well," he commented, and then left before Snape could respond.
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"Like I said," Harry said, feeling exasperated, "There's just this really big stone castle thing, and every time I'm either walking around alone until I wake up, or I'm getting chased by a huge snake."
Remus regarded him with half-worry and half-confusion. "I thought Severus's potion blocked visions," he said. Harry shook his head.
"Snape's potion blocks all visions, I'm sure of it," Harry said. "But this isn't a vision, Remus," Harry insisted again. "It's something else…it's like I'm really there or something. Like that time when Petunia knocked me out in the floo."
Harry saw a frown pass over Remus's face for a fleeting moment. "You saw this…castle…then?"
"Yeah, but I just thought I was having a strange dream or something," he explained. "But it's been going on every now and then these past few weeks." He rubbed his forehead, but stopped when he saw Remus's eyes on his hand.
"Is your scar…?"
"No, it's not hurting," Harry assured Remus. "I'm just confused about this. I mean, I don't ever have visions with Voldemort now, but I see this stupid castle all the time. And that snake only ever tells me that I shouldn't be there yet, because I don't have the 'key,' whatever that is."
"Should I tell Albus?" Remus asked. Harry sighed. "Probably. Bad things tend to happen when I don't tell him everything odd that happens to me. Which is a lot of things."
"That's true," Remus agreed quietly.
Harry knew at that moment that they were both thinking about Sirius.
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Harry spent the last few weeks he had before heading back to Hogwarts doing homework and practicing his Apparating. Kingsley came by once to help, and the only other time he got to practice his Apparating, Remus helped him. He still couldn't do more than a few apparations without exhausting himself, but he was getting better.
The hope was that he'd get good enough to get his license when he had time, and Harry had already decided he'd have to sneak off Hogwarts grounds every few weekends in order to work on that skill. He didn't care too much if he licensed or not, but Apparating could come in very handy if he needed it.
Remus had given him several books on animagi to read over, but hadn't been able to give him an actual practical lesson in becoming an animagi. Harry hoped that he'd be able to have a chance to learn over the winter holiday, but he didn't want to push Remus to do things for him. He knew that Remus was busy and didn't always have time to help him.
The potion that Snape had developed arrived in a larger quantity several days after Harry had begun using it, and Harry had wordlessly placed the several large flasks and half-dozen vials in his new-old trunk as he packed his things away the day before he was to head back to Hogwarts. He had not had an Occlumency lesson in more than two weeks, when he had proven for the third night in a row that he'd learned the secret to fighting a Legillimency attack, and in, what he felt, was ample reward, he had not seen Snape at all since then.
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Harry waited nervously in the front room, trunk and owl by his side. Remus and Tonks were supposed to have been ready to go more than ten minutes earlier, but they had yet to make their appearances.
A crash from somewhere upstairs told him that Tonks was in a hurry. She wasn't half as clumsy as she had been when he first met her, but she still tended to knock things over when she was nervous or rushing. Since she was probably both right now, he figured they'd be lucky if they made it out of the house without it falling down around their ears.
"Come on!" he heard Tonks shout laughingly, and after another small crash she came tripping down the stairs. "Wotcher, Harry!"
Harry grinned. "Good morning," he said, his excitement coming through in his voice. "Is Remus coming?" he asked. Tonks grinned.
"Someone didn't wake up on time," she said. "I heard something about dozing off as he dashed across the hall to the bathroom."
Harry grinned again, feeling good. He hadn't dreamed of anything but Quidditch the night before, and he felt quite invigorated as he hadn't for over a year. The dark fortress had disappeared from his nights, and he felt as if a huge weight had lifted from him with its loss.
"Are we going to make it to the train on time?" Harry asked. Tonks nodded.
"Sure," she said. "It's not far from here, you know."
Harry nodded and turned to check that his trunk was packed with everything he needed, and he felt a little thrill of something nice as he realized that he had been able to leave many of his belongings in his room…his room.
That was it, he realized. For the first time in his life, he had a space that was his and his alone.
A sudden torrent of sound brought him out of his realizations, and he saw Remus come almost running down the stairs. "Ready," Remus announced. "Let's get going."
"Great," Harry said happily. He went to heave his trunk up, but Tonks stopped him.
"Let me get that, Harry," she said. She waved her wand and the trunk floated into the air, followed quickly by Hedwig in her cage. Harry hesitated, to be sure that his belongings would be all right, and then followed Remus out the door.
The three went quickly to the car waiting directly out front of the house, and Harry took the backseat next to Tonks while Remus slid behind the wheel. "You know how to drive?" Harry asked, surprised. Remus nodded.
"It's good to know Muggle methods of things," he commented. "Sometimes things come in handy, Harry."
"Yeah," Harry agreed, thinking of how George and Fred had picked the lock on the cupboard under the stairs before second year. "It can be pretty useful."
"I'll have to teach you to drive sometime," Remus mused aloud. Harry smiled. That would be something, he decided. He'd have to take Remus up on that offer sometime.
"I've never been through this much of London before," Harry commented, looking around at the rows of buildings. "Are there a lot of wizards living in London?"
"A fair number," Remus agreed, "but most like to live in more rural areas, so they can be more secluded."
"Are you going to be at Hogwarts this year?" Harry asked abruptly. He'd been wondering just who was going to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts this year, and he'd been thinking that perhaps Remus would be taking the job again.
Remus glanced at him in the rearview mirror. "What gave you that idea?"
"Well, someone's got to teach DADA," Harry said slowly. Remus sighed.
"I can't," he said. "First of all, I'm a werewolf, and second, you know I have a lot to do with the Order. I can't be at Hogwarts all year teaching."
"Oh," Harry said, disappointed but trying not to sound childish about it.
"I can tell you that Albus has done the best he can to find someone that won't try to kill you this year. Hopefully, they're somewhat competent as well," Remus went on. Harry smiled.
"You're the only DADA teacher we've had so far that was any good," he said. Remus smiled at him as he glanced back quickly.
"It isn't saying much when a sickly werewolf is the best professor to be had," he said wryly. Harry laughed.
"Everyone says the job's cursed," Harry agreed. Remus laughed.
"Everyone's right," he admitted. Harry's eyebrows raised.
"Really? Who did it?" he asked.
"Word is your granddaddy Potter did," Tonks cut in. "He was a retired auror—probably taught that class for ten years."
"What happened to my grandparents?" Harry asked.
"Killed," Remus said quietly. "Voldemort."
"Oh," Harry said softly, and somehow felt that the conversation had reached its end. He stared out the window of the car and they drove in silence the rest of the way to the station.
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"HARRY!"
He heard the shout from across the platform, almost as soon as he had stepped across the barrier. Tonks was still with him, but Remus had had to return the car and get back to Dumbledore.
He barely had a chance to set down Hedwig's cage before he was engulfed in Hermione's arms as she leaped at him in a strong bear hug. She wasn't able to bowl him over, as she could have before, and he hugged her tightly. "Hello, 'Mione," Harry said, amused.
"We've been worried sick about you!" Hermione exclaimed, backing up and grinning happily. "Ron's probably still loading our trunks, and I'm sure he can't wait to see you too!"
"I've been fine," Harry assured her. "The potion works, and look, I've even fattened up."
Hermione smiled at him with a very motherly expression. "Good," she said, sounding satisfied. She turned to Tonks. "Does he eat enough?" she asked. Harry reddened, but didn't say anything.
He'd just seen a very familiar red head coming through the crowds. Ron grinned over the tops of just about everyone else's heads and waved. "Harry!"
"Hallo, Ron!" Harry called back. "Good to see you, mate!"
Ron pushed through the crowds and managed to get close. "You look better, Harry," he commented, and they stood awkwardly a moment, unsure of how to greet each other. Hermione must have seen because she huffed.
"Oh, honestly," she said, rolling her eyes. "Hug each other! You've been best friends five and a half years now!"
Ron and Harry grinned at each other, feeling stupid, and then hugged. "Only Hermione can make us look like idiots," Ron said as he stepped back. Hermione batted at her boyfriend's arm with a slight blush on her face.
Ron just laughed, though.
"Five minutes," Tonks commented, then accidentally stepped on someone's foot.
"Watch it!" the wizard she's stomped on snapped.
Tonks reddened. "Whoops, sorry."
"Let's get a compartment," Hermione suggested. "I don't want to have to spend the train ride in the same compartment as Malfoy."
"We won't," Harry said. Ron and Hermione looked at him, and Harry hastily added, "I'll tell you on the train," he promised. His friends nodded and Harry turned to Tonks.
She smiled at him. "Take care, Harry," she said. Harry smiled.
"Thanks for everything," he told her sincerely. She laughed and then suddenly hugged him. Harry stiffened a moment, surprised, then relaxed.
"See you at the holidays," she said. "You're coming home for them, you know."
Harry really did stiffen this time. Tonks stepped back to look at him. "What's wrong?" she asked.
"Home," he echoed. "Going…home," he said slowly, and then smiled again. Tonks looked at him a little confusedly, but then her eyes cleared.
"It's terrible what those relatives of yours did to your life, Harry," she said softly. Harry shrugged.
"Hey, but I'm going home this year!" Harry said, too happy to even think about the Dursleys at all. "Let's go," he suggested. "See ya," he added. Tonks waved them off, and Harry led Ron and Hermione towards the train.
He was more than ready to return to Hogwarts for his sixth year of school. Big things were going to happen this year, he knew, and he was eager to do all he could to prepare for them.
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A/N: This chapter was hard to write. It was such a transitional chapter that I had difficulty just trying to figure out how to make it move from summer to heading back to Hogwarts without being overly rushed. As it is, it ended up short and choppy, but I guess it works. There's a lot more to come for Harry now, and things are certainly just heating up. Please, please review, because if I don't get reviews, I don't feel that motivated to write. –Miss Laine
PS: responses to reviewers will be at the end of the next chapter, after I write it.
PPS: the next chapter will be up in a week to a week and a half. I have nothing written past this point, but I have it planned. So hang in there for me, and there will be an update soon. Thanks!