Merlin proceeded from room to room, looking all over each of them, but invariably, nothing. He had decided to search all of the castle's rooms one by one for Morgana, with no success until now. He had gone around the whole castle twice already, including the catacombs.

He had even visited the dragon's cave, in case Morgana had found it by chance while looking for a place where she could be on her own. But all he had found there was the dragon mocking his vain efforts, insisting on how he had warned him not to get involved in the first place.

He reached Morgana's chambers once more, but they were still empty. He sighed, disheartened. He'd been searching the whole castle for over two hours now, but was still empty handed.

Where could she be? Where would she have gone to hide? What had she heard of his conversation with Gaius and what had she concluded from it? Since she obviously didn't want to be found, should he assume the worse: that she had guessed the role she had played in the curse?

Merlin continued to the King's chambers, where Gaius was taking care of him. Uther was still in his bed and in an awful state. The sickness had progressed to the point nearly all of his body had turned to wood. He looked worse than Gwen had at the peak of her contamination, right before they had healed her.

"How is he doing?" Merlin asked, even though he already knew the answer.

"Not well," Gaius confirmed. "His situation is becoming more and more preoccupying by the minute. I'm not sure he'll survive more than another hour or two..." He paused for a second. "Did you find Morgana?"

Merlin shook his head. He had told Gaius about his discovery regarding Morgana's role before going after her, and his tutor had agreed she was part of the key to the cure.

"What about Arthur? Is he back yet?"

Merlin shook his head again. "Is there anything else we could do? Is there really no other way to heal him? Not even a potion or a spell? Even just something to slow down the curse's progression, in order to give Arthur more time to come back?"

"I'm afraid there isn't. I'm already doing everything in my power."

"But maybe I could -"

"I know you'd like to be more useful, but you don't have that sort of magic, Merlin," Gaius interrupted. "You just have to accept it."

Merlin sighed. "I should keep looking for Morgana. If I still haven't found her when Arthur returns with Livia, I'll heal Uther by sharing my magic with her, like we did to heal Gwen."

"Be careful with Morgana when you find her," Gaius advised. "If she understood she was involved in casting the curse, she must be extremely upset right now."

Merlin decided to continue his search down in the city. Morgana was nowhere to be found in the castle, so maybe she had sought refuge elsewhere. Though he hoped she hadn't left the city itself...

But to be honest, he didn't even know where to begin. Looking for one single person in an entire city was like looking for a needle in a haystack. While roaming around, he stumbled upon Gwen, taking care of some sick villagers.

"Gwen! Have you seen Morgana recently?" he asked immediately.

"Not since her breakfast this morning. Why, is there something wrong?"

Merlin shrugged. "No, everything is fine," he assured, hoping he sounded convincing. He didn't want to frighten Gwen uselessly.

"Merlin, there is something, I can tell. You look worried. I saw Arthur this morning. He was distracted and he seemed worried too. Come on, tell me, what's going on?"

Merlin shrugged again. "Nothing..."

Gwen sighed. "What are you both keeping from me? And why are you looking for Morgana? Is she in any danger?"

"No... No, she isn't... I... I don't know, I hope not," Merlin finally admitted.

"Do you need some help looking for her?"

"I suppose. Apparently she's not in the castle, and the city is too big to -" As he mentioned it, Merlin absent-mindedly glanced towards the castle.

And then, in that one glance, he knew. He knew where Morgana was. The one place he hadn't checked.

"Merlin?"

Without even thinking about it, he started running back towards the castle. There was no time, he had to hurry.

Behind him, he barely heard Gwen call: "Merlin!"

He was running like mad, bumping into some villagers on his way. Once in the castle, he rushed up the stairs, four at a time. When he reached the top of the tower, out of breath, he was relieved to see Morgana was still there. She was standing close to the edge, staring idly at the city down below.

"Morgana, don't do this," Merlin begged, panting, fearing about her intentions.

She didn't move. She didn't even turn to face him, and remained with her back to him.

"Morgana?" Merlin called again.

"It's me, isn't it? I'm the one who cursed all these people?" she finally said, barely audible.

So she had guessed...

"It's not your fault..." Merlin assured with a calm voice. He began to take small steps towards her, slowly, afraid she might jump.

"Yes it is. I almost killed Gwen..." Morgana insisted, her voice strangled by a sob. Her hand flew to her mouth.

"You didn't do it on purpose," Merlin continued. "You just need to learn to control your magic."

Morgana didn't seem to be listening to him. Instead, she kept on ranting. "I can't heal them... I can't... They're all going to die, because of me... Every single one of them... The children, the babies... It's my fault, it's all my fault..."

Her thorough distress was beginning to affect Merlin, but he tried to set it aside. "Arthur has gone after Livia. He'll bring her back, and then, with her around, you'll be able to heal them. We need to be patient and wait for them."

He continued walking forward. He was so close now he could almost grab her arm.

"I don't want to be like this... I don't want these powers... I don't want to be different..."

"I know, and I understand completely. Believe me, I understand more than you can imagine," Merlin assured her.

He extended his arm slowly in an attempt to catch her arm, but he had barely brushed against it when Morgana pushed him away roughly.

"Don't touch me!" she exclaimed as she turned to him at last. Her cheeks were soaking wet with tears, but the harshness in her eyes made Merlin take a step backwards.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be intrusive," he apologised.

"Of course you didn't. I mean, you understand completely, don't you? Maybe you even went through this as well. Because you're a sorcerer yourself," Morgana finished on an accusative tone.

Merlin couldn't help but notice it wasn't a question.

"Oh, please, don't look so surprised. You may have managed to fool Arthur and Gwen about the magic book, but not me, though I still had doubts until I heard you and Gaius talk. The book is yours, not Livia's. I saw her mutter a spell back in Gwen's house, but I didn't understand immediately it was only meant to convince Arthur it was hers."

She knew. She really knew. It was no use denying it now.

"I wish you found out differently," he finally muttered.

"Yes, me too," Morgana concluded and turned away from him once more.

While Merlin still found her dangerously close to the edge, he also noticed the strong resentment in her voice. "Morgana, please, move away from the edge," he requested.

"How long have you known that I was the one responsible for the curse?" she asked coldly, entirely ignoring his plea.

"I only found out last night," Merlin assured. "I swear I had absolutely no idea until I discovered you had healed Gwen's neighbour."

"So you already knew this morning, when you asked me to heal Uther?"

"Yes, I did," he admitted in a whisper.

"Go away, Merlin," Morgana demanded.

"No."

"I mean it. Leave."

She sounded so angry at him...

"I'm not leaving you here alone."

"Why not? That wouldn't be too different from what you've always done."

"I don't -"

"All this time, you knew about me!" Morgana interrupted while she turned to face him again. "You knew I had magic! But you never said anything about yourself!"

"Morgana, you know how it's like! How we have to hide and -"

"No, no more excuses! You've had a hundred opportunities. I even gave you another one this morning in Uther's chambers! But you never cared to mention it!" She paused and stared at him. "You're a hypocrite and a liar. You claim to be a friend, but you're nothing more than an opportunist! All you do is only what suits you the best!"

"No, I am your friend!" Merlin protested. "Don't imagine for a second that I -"

"Shut up!" Morgana exclaimed as she burst into tears again. She continued with a trembling voice and an accusative tone: "I was lonely, and I was scared! And you knew it! You saw me come to Gaius nearly every night because of my nightmares! But still, you said nothing! Nothing!" She paused between two sobs. "Go away Merlin. You disgust me, I don't want to see you again."

Merlin was now on the verge of tears himself. Morgana's words were very harsh, but they hurt so much only because he could find truth in them. Had there really always been obstacles preventing him from revealing his powers to her, or had he just always been too much of a coward to say anything?

"Morgana..."

"I said go away!"

In the split seconds that followed Morgana's shout, some invisible force sent Merlin back to knock against a wall at least thirty feet behind him. He stood up with difficulty, a little concussed, only to see Morgana still staring at him angrily.