Crazy Happenings
Chapter 15: Day 3, Nighttime Part 1!
Stepping into the bathtub with a low grunt, Vaida turned on the shower and closed her eyes. She sighed. It was a hot day. And she was hungry, too. Better not take too long in the shower; she remembered that dinner would commence soon.
Fifteen minutes later, she stepped out slowly, her hand reaching out for a nearby towel. Wrapping it around herself, she proceeded to take another smaller one and dry her hair.
When she was about to look into the mirror, she immediately felt something wrong.
Very wrong. Ominously wrong.
Looking into the mirror, her sharp eyes widened.
She screamed, a war cry-like sound.
"Okay, this is SOO not working..."
Erk paced up and down agitatedly, muttering polite-sounding curses under his breath. His hands raked through his hair irritably. He stopped in his steps in a swift motion and looked to the other end of the room, where a certain assassin stood with a passive look. "Okay, turn around again. Let's have another look," he instructed.
Jaffar turned around and faced the mage, but only succeeded in making Erk slap his face in desperation with both hands with a loud groan. The Angel of Death shook his head, looking down at his body.
He didn't think wearing Erk's clothes would make Nino come back to him, either.
In fact, based on the reaction of the usually unmoved mage, he almost dreaded looking at his reflection in the mirror. How would he look like in red, when he was always dressed in black?
Previously, the Angel of Death had tried his very best at being the 'Angel of Light', which is something any reader would puke at already. He even couldn't bring himself to mouth out the words "Nino, you're a good girl" for a good five minutes of tremendous difficulty, and when he DID finally say it, it was all in stammers and hesitation that was VERY unlike the cold-hearted assassin.
And to top it off, it was the most forced, artificial statement anyone could ever make.
Then Erk had tried a different method by asking Jaffar to say something else that did not concern Nino. But Jaffar couldn't even say "Please, lower your voice, Serra" (which Erk considered was quite a popular thing he said everyday) without changing into his own words, "Shut the hell up, you female dog" murderously in his raspy voice while grasping his Killer Edges instinctively.
Pleases and excuses most definitely did not fit him, not even a small inch.
"It's not working," Jaffar stated unhelpfully in a monotone.
"Yeah, like I don't know that," Erk snapped back, but stopped himself from saying further. He sighed heavily and sat down on a nearby chair. "Look, I'm sorry for being snappy and not myself, but I can't seriously find a way to help you to be like me. You can't impersonate someone, Jaffar! It's impossible for you and me. Just compare our body size first! I'm not surprised my clothes haven't torn off yet; they're starting to feel a little tight on myself, what say you?"
If there was anything Jaffar absolutely failed in, it was in terms of the everyday life loaded with trivial matters. And the psychology of the female sex.
The assassin clothed in Erk's daily clothes (which Nino claimed to like so much somehow) only stared back.
Obviously Erk didn't find that helpful in the least. Probably even more irritating. He tried speaking in calmer terms.
"Look, there are too many differences between you and me. For one thing, even if you can wear my clothes and somehow look like me (which I think is definitely unnatural), you can't 'forge' my hair, right? And how about your voice? Frankly speaking, yours is raspy and whispery, and mine is—well, it's like that. You see what I'm getting at, don't you?"
Even though he had to admit that, Jaffar still stuck to the fact that there must be a way. "...I do, but that's not helping," he again stated, his tones calm but inside there was one BIG tornado. Big enough to make the great stolid Jaffar worry.
Erk flung his arms up in despair. "This 'teaching you how to be cute' won't work! Not any teacher I know has even attempted to teach someone how to be 'cute'! Logically, there isn't even any such thing!" he half-yelled.
"..."
"But well, I've tried, and it doesn't work! In the first place, I don't know how in the world Nino finds me 'cute', so you can't expect me to make you 'cute' as well, right? I'm just being victimized by you!" he firmly stated. "You think I wanted to be Nino's obsession?"
Jaffar frowned. "Obsession?"
"Yeah, obsession," Erk replied, sighing. Letting off steam was what he needed. He still hadn't gotten over the fact that Jaffar beat him up to such humiliation a few days ago. Why he was even helping him was already a wonder.
"I don't think she really 'likes' me, it's just probably just some childish obsession that the dumb potion gave her. Why can't you just wait until tomorrow? Less than 24 hours and you'll have her clinging back to you already!"
"...I want her cured as soon as possible."
"Well, I hate to break the news to you, but you'll just have to wait until the effects are gone. If the others are already cured, then yours is a special case. I'm sure Nino will apologise when she realises what she has done the past few days," he said, gaining his usual sarcastic composure.
Erk had no idea what Jaffar would have said in response, for the bell for dinner rang just then. He quickly walked towards the door, avoiding contact.
"Ah, good timing. I was just wondering when the bell would ring. I doubt their time is accurate." Turning back to Jaffar, he nodded his head. "Well, I'll be frank with you. I'm sorry for not being able to help you, but I have no powers in any attraction-teaching whatsoever. And leave my clothes on the chair, will you? I'll collect them later."
Jaffar nodded silently.
Before exiting his room, Erk faced him again with a dead-serious face. "And as a man to man, do not ever make me succumb to such heavy humiliation in front of the mass public ever again. Next time," his eyes narrowed, "I won't be so careless as to let myself lose to you."
As soon as he had closed the door from outside, he heaved a sigh of relief.
"Whew... that wasn't so hard. Wearing my clothes did quite make him look more... 'docile' than with those black spooky clothes after all. I'd be insulting him too much if I told him that he looked like the most ridiculous imitator I had ever seen, I suppose."
He chuckled heartily to himself at his little joke.
"Mmm, this is real good food. You eat meals like this everyday, Matthew?" Legault asked, scooping food hungrily into his mouth.
"Yeah. That's why I need extra workouts everyday. Otherwise I'd just be a fat piggy-wiggy, waddling along trying to steal from the enemies," Matthew replied with a grin.
"Half of the meals were prepared by me, you know!" Serra cut in, beaming. "Did you like them as well, Lord Hector?" she asked the marquess of Ostia.
Knowing the 'dear Serra of Ostia' so well, he refrained from making a comment and just grunted. Such things were nothing compared to his fear of Farina (now crowned with the infamous title 'devil demonress'). He involuntarily shuddered at the thought. The three Ilian Pegasus Knights sisters were sure going wacko this last few days... no, wait, Fiora was still sane, wasn't she? She was still plain sailing. Lucky Kent.
Speaking of the sisters, Florina was sure becoming a real problem... he could only hope that the old Florina would be back tomorrow. He had questioned Hannah closely (with difficulty) and found out that it was an unexpected side effect. Still, he could hardly believe that the REAL Florina was, in plain fact, as cool as cucumber.
Then again, Hannah had told him that she once met the mildest, shyest, quietest girl you'd have known that hardly spoke with the softest voice to have said "You're so dead" and "What the hell" to no one in particular. He hardly believed her words, but he was always one for respecting his elders even though they were cranky, and so he was forced to believe such almost-impossible facts.
He hardly knew whether the current Florina still had any feelings for him. That left him nettled. It was always a pleasant feeling to know that he was deeply admired even though he could be as good as any uncontrolled, frenzied barbarian in certain anonymous cases. It made his arrogance satisfied.
But speaking about frenzy, Florina was so... ruthless. True, it was Farina who started the quarrel among them, and it was Farina who showed her claws first.
What else could Florina do other than protect herself, right? She wasn't at fault. And at least she put Farina out until tomorrow morning, and by then, she should already snap out from that potion effects, so I shouldn't be seeing anything of her, thank Elimine.
Still, it was such a pity that Florina had gone... rather barbaric. She just had to respond to the fight readily.
Without mercy. He was even scared, afraid.
And for Hector of Ostia to think that, well, let's just say that even phantoms wouldn't give him the chills. Because ghosts wouldn't even bother to waste their time by trying to get him buckled and to end up failing most shamefully.
-Flashback, 20 minutes ago-
The whole crew was at the landing leading to the stairs to descend to the dining room when it all happened suddenly.
"What's all this I've been hearing about you and Lord Hector, huh Florina?" Farina pushed her sister roughly. Her eyes were still a little woozy-looking ever since she heartlessly strained her own eyes in her successful search for her—er, object of desire in the 'concealed places' of the unlighted stables.
The meek Florina would have shrunk sizes smaller, but the NEW Florina stood firmly on her ground. "Oh really? I'm afraid I have no idea of what you're talking about, sister," she calmly replied, her eyebrow raised.
Obviously Farina had never seen this side of her submissive sister before. Taking an effort to hide her bewilderment, she snapped: "Don't pretend. I know everything. Everything."
"Ah, and kindly inform me of this 'everything', my dear sister?"
"Sucking up to him, of course! Sneaking out with him behind my back!"
Florina stared back at Farina for a moment before burst out laughing. By this time, everyone else had well noticed the commotion. Interested parties had stayed back, watching with anticipation while the uninterested parties continued their way down the stairs, the thought of dinner apparently much more inducing than a two-sisters quarrel.
"Oooo..." Being the usual curious child she was, Nino breathed excitedly. "Are they going to go at each other, Erk?"
Erk merely rolled his eyes. "I've no interest in trivial girl matters, if you wish to know. And if you could just let go of my cloak for the last millionth time? You're welcome to stay here and be part of the audience, but I'd rather fill my empty stomach and get moving," he replied coldly, hoping to detach him from her hold. For the thousandth time he wondered at her will to do what she wanted, and get it.
Truly unimaginable for a child like her to possess such an iron grip on her hands until he, an adult, could not pull free.
"No way!" she cried. "I'll never let go until you promise to be with me everyday, every hour, every minute, every second, every millisecond, and uh..." she paused uncertainly. "What's after millisecond again?" she asked innocently.
He slapped his forehead in exasperation. It looked already bad enough parading around with a child tagging behind him who wanted to know simply too much for her own good (and not to mention SOMEONE who kept glaring daggers at him). And now he was forced to watch a catfight about to commence, and to be deprived—yes, deprived, of his meal! Good lord, what had he done wrong to deserve this?
"Ah, you've decided to be part of the spectators too?" Matthew joked, who received a 'shut-up' glare from Erk in return.
Back to the two sisters...
"What's so funny?" Farina snapped angrily at Florina. "You think it's so funny, huh? I suppose it's really hilarious to be on the upper side and laugh down at me, isn't it? I suppose it gives you a sense of superiority above your sister, huh?" She took a step forward menacingly.
Letting herself relax on the banister coolly, Florina shrugged her shoulders casually. "Well, in normal circumstances I would say that what you're saying is absolutely nonsense, but since you're so eager on your point, then I'll just say yes and agree pleasantly with you," she answered with a smirk.
Those spectators immediately shivered when they saw the smirk plastered on Florina's face.
"Second time," Legault whispered to an equally goosebumped Matthew.
Farina's eyes widened, not believing her ears. In her normal condition she would check herself and wonder at the outrageous characteristics that her sister displayed, but she only saw red all over. She forgot about the commotion she was making, forgot she was in public, forgot everything other than her inscrutable sister and red.
Bright, dark, bloody, sticky gooey red. Uh oh.
Balling her fists at her sides, she hissed like an angry snake. "Are you threatening me?" Her voice was quiet but filled with cold steel.
A glint entered Florina's eyes. She was still enjoying her new-founded character.
And turns out to be that the new Florina enjoyed a good fight.
And here she was, entering the prospects of one! She could hardly remember the last time she got to fight a heated one-on-one battle without Lyn or anyone else butting in with worries of her health. She just only realised how she was craving for a good, bloodied battle, shall we say. None of their lances were here, but oh well; she guessed hand-to-hand combat would do.
It would remind her of her good, old days as a pegasus knight in training, where they were forced to fight against their teammates with their purposely-grown-long nails. Their theme was 'imitation of a cat', of course.
"Depends on how you choose to interpret it," she replied with a challenging smile.
The crowd shrunk back involuntarily as Farina lunged with a snarl. The snarl said, "You're dead."
Florina smiled again. "Try me."
Hector shuddered at the thought. Florina had refused to dine with the rest of the crew after the fight, but told the maids to bring her tray up to her room while she had a thorough bath with a pleased air of satisfaction.
With due respect, the crew all voted that the world—or, to be more precise, Castle Ostia and its inhabitants—would be safer that night without Florina's fearsome extravagancies. Sleeping powder was carefully induced into her tea.
So absorbed he was in thinking that he choked on his food. The food tasted good, but it sucked in his mouth. His saliva probably wasn't functioning properly. Still, what a pity all of the sleeping draughts had been exhausted, he thought. He would have certainly made good use of them like Florina.
"Well, aren't you guys gonna announce the Sain ordeal outcome or something?" Eliwood impatiently asked.
"Yeah, we're all eating our hearts out," Serra chimed in.
"I'm dying to tell you guys about it, but I think you people had better finish your dinner first. What we will tell you might just affect your stomach." The 'Seven Hunters' grinned evilly (with the exception of Kent).
"Oh, just how bad can it be?" Oswin laughed.
Erk shrugged his shoulders. "Alright, then how about if I say it has to do with hungry, maniacal chickens—"
He hardly finished his sentence when Serra screamed shrilly, and our poor, poor Erk suffered a LOT of pain to his exhausted eardrums.
"Stop it!! I'm not hearing another word about it, and risk my fragile stomach getting upset until I've at least finished my meal!!"
"But—" everyone else chorused.
"I insist!" she exclaimed. "And I'm going to keep on screaming the whole way if you people insist on upsetting my tummy." She prepared to scream.
The purple-haired mage hurriedly raised his hands in surrender. "Oh, for Elimine's sake, let's just do as she say, alright? I'm already half-deaf as it is." He looked imploringly at Lyn.
Lyn merely shrugged. "As you like. I don't think anyone else in this room loves Serra's screams more than you do as it is."
"Why—" Serra jumped up.
Erk pulled her down. "Just sit down and accept the fact as it is."
"Meanie you, Erk. Be glad that I'm too hungry to shout at you."
"You know, I rather pity the poor Sain. It's rather pitiful for him to be kept captive in his bedroom with a 'guard' twenty-four hours. Food and everything's still given, yes, but aren't we being a bit too harsh on him, Pent honey dear?" Louise half-purred, dabbing her mouth with her napkin. The incoming results of the punishment to be awarded to Sain, Florina's new 'character', and the side effects of the concocted potion were the hot topics of the moment.
Raven immediately cut in. "That little damn skunk needs no sympathy!" he heatedly said.
"You are too soft, as always, Lady Louise," Rath added.
Louise laughed. "Well, perhaps I am. After all, I cannot say much, since the potion did not affect me adversely. What do you say, Pent dear?"
"Hmm? Yes, it is rather so. But considering what he has done, I cannot say that he did not deserve the punishment. You are pregnant, Louise," Pent replied rather seriously. "What would happen if somehow the side effects took a bad turn on the baby? You may be due in a few months time, remember."
"Oh, it's so sweet of you to think of that, dear. Though I wonder why isn't my stomach growing bigger yet... unique, isn't it?" she beamed brightly. A little too brightly, perhaps.
"She might just be addressing 'Uncle Pent' as her 'dear honey love sweetie pie' if she's not careful with her honeyed tongue," teased Matthew as he nudged Legault beside him. "He might just get a little confused, the poor guy." He was awarded a snicker from the other thief.
Through observation, Louise was found to attach herself to Pent more often with honey languages, Rebecca was found dressing more... er, shall we say attractively?, while Priscilla kept attempting half-murder on her brother Raven (and therefore had to be greatly restrained), Karla squealed at the sign of blood, and Serra was chattering non-stop with extra vigour, though Erk seriously wondered whether it WAS really a side effect. But what was the biggest change of all was...
"Look!" Ninian gasped, pointing a finger upwards.
Everyone in the dining room followed the direction of her finger, and gasped when they saw an unknown beauty walking down the spiral staircase. She wasn't wearing a nice dress, nor did she walk with poise, but it was her face. Lovely facial features, smooth creamy fair skin, luscious hair, slim-cut features, and everything else a girl could dream of. Exclamations arose.
"Who's that?"
"Never seen her before!"
"What a beauty! Look at her hair! So long and wavy!"
"Is she an alien?"
"You know, maybe she's Nergal's wife, coming for revenge..."
"Oh don't be silly. Who would ever marry such a fugly, idiotic one-eyed guy?"
"How did she ever come here?"
"Car? ...No wait, we haven't cars yet at our time. Must be the author putting ideas into my head again."
"Is she an angel? Looks like it!"
"Her wings must have broken down, or got splattered into pieces when she fell onto Elibe!"
"Have you people gone nuts?"
"She looks oddly familiar, really... who IS she?"
The blonde reached the end of the staircase, her long hair reaching past her waist. She scowled at them heavily, especially to the male species. "What the hell are you looking at?" she snapped roughly, a sultry voice, an accusing but slim finger at the males. "Never seen a woman before?"
A few males started drooling, but immediately got sharp pokes from the females. The females were probably the only ones who could think sanely at that moment.
"That pose... where did I ever see it before?" Karla wondered.
"I think I've seen her somewhere before..." Nino poked in.
The blonde stamped her foot in irritation. "God, do I look so bloody different? For heaven's sake, is the name Vaida still registered in your useless brains?"
No one caught the hint. The beauty was still processing in their brains.
"Oh, I AM VAIDA, dammit!"
NOW it was clear. Loud gasps.
"VAIDA??!!"
"What in the world..."
"But Vaida's exactly opposite!"
"No wonder I thought she looks oddly familiar..."
"Aw, no angel after all..."
"It's not an April Fool's joke, right?"
"Haha, so not funny. It's not even April yet."
"Is it one of the side-effects of the potion?"
"Must be. I really wonder what old Hannah mixed to form the potion... wouldn't surprise me if she dumped facial and skin cream as one of the ingredients."
"Then what about MY skin?"
The 'unknown beauty' now known as Vaida the most-possibly-ugliest-female-in-the-group interrupted heavily with a death glare. "YES, I AM Vaida, and if anyone says ANYTHING more about how I look like, I swear that I'll cut off your head with my spear and feed it to Umbriel! And when I do lay my eyes on that bloody lousy, conniving little pinch of a knight, I swear to myself that I'll—"
"But you look so beautiful now, Vaida! What a transformation of the side-effects!"
"Yeah, just look at the guys now... better lock Vaida up someplace where the guys won't keep drooling, otherwise they're all gonna be single tomorrow without the girls." A barked laughter.
"You shouldn't be angry of how you look like now! Any other woman would assuredly die to even have half of what you have right now!"
"Yeah, I'm really starting to feel envious..."
"Feel free to say jealous. I'd give up almost everything to have her looks!"
"Though, honestly speaking, I never thought she could look so pretty..."
"I guess we never did take a real good look."
"Nooo! The angel is gone!! She must have eaten the angel!"
"SHUT THE HELL UP!" interrupted Vaida again, looking oh-so-positively angry. "I HATE it! I hate this frail 'white' skin, I hate my distracting hair, and I hate my skinny body! I want my short hair back, my supple muscles, my deep-tanned skin, and I WANT MY SCAR BACK! My DEEP, LOVELY SCAR!" she half-screamed, stamping her foot over and over again.
NOW the guys weren't so starry-eyed.
"...What a weirdo she really is."
"I'd cry for my whole life if I ever had such an obvious scar wound on my cheek and leg."
"You know, if you're so longing for your scar, you can always take a marker and draw one ugly one. Gahaha."
"She really doesn't know what beauty means, eh?"
"I'm starting to think that she honestly sees hideousness as beauty."
"That kind of side-effect is really wasted on her."
"Why couldn't it have happened to me? Oh why, why, WHY?"
"Well... if you're so hateful of your own looks, just bear with it for another 12 hours or so, Vaida! The effects should be gone by then, right?"
Vaida snapped back. "It better be, otherwise..." She sighed in frustration. "Bah, no way in hell am I going to sit and eat like normal while you're all staring so damn rudely! Send my dinner up to my room, girl!" she barked to a cowering but admiring servant standing a few feet away.
Everyone watched with wonder and stupefaction as a lovely blonde stomped up the staircase bad-temperedly in a very unladylike manner.
"...What in Elimine was that all about...?"
"...I've no idea."
"My angel has perished!! Noooo!"
"Oh shut up! You and your angel!"
Sain rubbed his wrists gently with a grimace. Every part of him hurt like supreme hell. His head was throbbing painfully, his muscles were cramped, his knees felt wobbly, his arms felt rickety, and goodness knows what else. Never in his life had he been tied up so tightly! Even Wallace's worst punishments were hardly comparable.
He never knew getting tied up to a tree with bees above his head and having agonizing punishments vibrating in his eardrums the whole time could bring about such disastrous results. Terrible, horrifying, a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y ghastly.
"You asked for it," his inner mind stated unfeelingly.
"Thank you so much for telling me that," he replied sarcastically.
"Always welcome, buddy."
He sighed. Letting himself fall onto the bed lightly, he once again marveled at the softness of the bed. What a haven it felt! To feel the soft draperies and the comfortable sponge mattress lying underneath after feeling solid hard rock belonging to an old tree infested by queen killer bees!
What a long day it had been. The scariest day he had ever had in his whole entire life. Then again, he knew that it wouldn't be the scariest day once he went through all his... list of punishments. He had completely NO ideas on how to live through them and still come out alive and well.
"Well, at least they didn't keep me locked up and without food, thank Elimine," he muttered tiredly. "Gotta be thankful for that."
He looked at the silver tray placed on a small table earlier by a shy, cute maid of sweet sixteen (or so his expert eyes judged) that fled in a flustered manner when he gave his Sain-trademark; 'The Wink'. That girl was probably the hundred thousandth one he had honoured with his so-called 'Irresistible Wink of the Women Connoisseur'. Or perhaps going to the millionth.
With so many on his list, undoubtedly he had lost count a long time ago. How unfortunate it all was—
He cut his own thoughts short when his eyes went through the food served.
"If one even calls it food..." he muttered, sighing.
He never knew his comrades had such resourceful dark talents in torturing.
"Oh, c'mon Wil... don't you find me pretty?" she inquired sweetly with those big puppy-eyes staring at the male archer.
On the other side of the table, an excited Rebecca was pestering an embarrassed Wil sitting beside her. He wasn't particularly excited to sit next to her for dinner, but if he didn't, then she would have burst into tears at that moment, and everyone would blame him and say that he's "such a bully", "insensitive jerk" and what-not, so he'd to put up with her... er, sexy attitude for the evening.
He found it hard to resist looking at her soulful green eyes. But he had concluded long-time that the side effects on Rebecca had it pros and cons, and after some hard thinking, he finally put it to that the cons weighed slightly, just a tiny little bit more than the pros. "Uh... yeah, I do."
She kept her stare on him. "... Anything else?"
He sighed. This was probably the tenth time he had said this the whole day. "You look positively great."
"Yay!" she squealed. She was silent for a few moments (thank god, thought Wil), but came up with another question. "... My room is all in a heap right now, and there isn't enough time to spring-clean it, so—"
"No!" came Wil's immediate reply. He rolled his eyes; like he'd never guessed this was coming! "NO sharing! Yesterday was already bad enough," he firmly said.
But the one naughty part of himself said inwardly, "Oh no, you know you liked it, you big fat liar," with a knowing smirk. He shrugged it off.
Rebecca remained silent for a few moments before turning back to him meekly. "...Really?"
Wil could feel her breaking his wall of resistance slowly but persistently. He gulped nervously, his rebelling emotions desperately struggling with his personal moral ethics.
Whether it should be considered fortunately or otherwise, his emotions went bang to the wall.
"No!" He forced himself to tear away from her irresistible face. "I'd be going against my own rules. Uh... sorry, Rebecca," he paused hesitatingly, choosing his words carefully. He was skating on thin ice now. "But I'm sure that, uh... you'll, er... agree with me, uh... tomorrow?" he ended weakly.
She burst into a flood of tears and pushed her chair backwards as she half-ran from the room. He sighed and concluded that he was either a failure in preventing sensitive-mode Rebecca from crying multiple times or that she loved to turn on the tap whenever he disagreed with her.
He noticed majority of the crew staring at him with all sorts of faces. Puzzled, accusing, smiling and knowing faces. He ignored the accusing faces and gratefully took the sympathetic ones.
"Don't worry, people. False alarm," he declared.
"Oh, false alarm. Couldn't you have said so earlier, Wil?" Marcus reprimanded. "I was just about to whistle for my horse when I heard about the commotion."
To everyone's REAL alarm he suddenly produced a very sharp and shiny spear and a shield by his side, which almost toppled the table over.
Louise lightly touched the old cavalier beside her. "But the only commotion was dear Rebecca crying, General Marcus," she gently said, the tone she always used for The Old, Senile and Harmless People.
"Oh?" Marcus looked blankly. "But when women cry, it's either because monsters are approaching them, or there are snakes on the grass!"
"Yeah, try see if any of us are Dopplegangers, or if any grass spurts out from the hard cement floor," Harken muttered.
"Don't they scream instead of cry?" Nino asked innocently to Ninian.
"You know, General Marcus," Louise replied, "nowadays, women don't cry because of that. The era has changed," she said darkly.
Everyone gazed at Louise's new, never-heard-of tone. "Louise, are you all right?" Pent asked concernedly. Maybe slight changes were to come along with pregnancy, he thought. He himself was no expert on such a delicate subject; the baby to him would be just an ideal experiment on how much an extent an infant could be resistant to anima magic. In fact, it could hold out quite some promising prospects...
Louise smiled her usual angelic smile, but now oddly tinted with... something else. "Oh of course, my Lord Pent, why should I not be?" she said sweetly. "Now, to go back to what I was saying, the reason why we women cry is mainly because of three reasons; one, because they don't get to spend a lot of time with their husbands, who are more interested in other things." She looked even more sweetly at the gray-haired man beside her.
For the first time, Lord Pent looked sheepish. He cleared his throat self-consciously.
Marcus looked even more blankly at her. "...This is all news to me!"
"Oh yes, I'm sure it is, General," Louise reassured smilingly.
"And then?" he urged her.
"Two, because their individual spouse doesn't notice that she is pregnant with a baby, nor notice the symptoms of pregnancy until she herself tells him," she continued.
Pent looked even more sheepish. More than a sheep could be.
"Preg—pregnan—cy?" Wild, uneducated Bartre repeated. "Bartre not understand this new word," he shook his head dolefully.
"Shh, Bartre," Lucius tapped his knee, his eyes still on the 'show'. "You can have your English lesson afterwards."
"And three..." Louise paused.
"Yes, yes," Marcus impatiently said, "go on."
"Three, because their husbands don't apologise as soon as they point out his mistakes in front of a crowd, but instead to choose to behave like a guilty child looking like a silent sheep," she said serenely, looking directly at Pent. "Don't you just know what I mean, dear?"
Pent stared at her speechless, his mature, handsome face—kyaaa, Pent fans, go you!!!—looking bashful and ashamed.
"Aha, are we going to be witnesses of the first ever controversy between this always-sweet, loving couple?" Matthew whispered to Legault, snickering.
"L—Louise..." Pent stammered.
"Nah, I think more likely a cheesy scene, if my thief instincts serve me right," Legault replied with a smirk.
"Is this our next bet?" Matthew asked.
"Maybe."
Summoning all the magical charm that he possessed during his youth and even at his present age, Pent stretched his hand out to hers gently. "My dear, darling Louise, I really do apologise... from the deepest recess of my heart—for all the recent time I've abandoned you, how much I've left you alone—I—" he paused, his serious, captivating eyes locked into hers.
(Pent fans: all in a dead hysterical faint, the author following suit)
Louise shook her pretty head slowly. "For once, I think I shall be a little harder and not fall into your lovely charm, my dear husband," she replied, smiling.
"Does that mean she can actually avoid his charm?" Priscilla whispered. "No one's done that before, you know!"
"I guess that just shows what matrimony does to you," Guy answered, shrugging his shoulders casually.
Pent realised that just charm was not enough to win his beautiful wife back. He had to do more than just words, he thought as he inserted a mouthful of chicken soup into his mouth.
And then...
Everyone at the table gasped as real-time sound effects as Pent suddenly pulled Louise into a deep kiss with an arm around her, indifferent to their surroundings and audience.
The next sound effects were a good deal of 'Oooooooh' and whistles.
"Cancel the bet; I just won," Legault arrogantly declared.
"Without any money placed on the bet in the first place, yes," Matthew reminded with a smirk.
When the couple finally pulled away, Louise was smiling happily like a sixteen-year-old girl. "Why, Pent, it's been so dreadfully long since you fed food into my mouth through yours!" she exclaimed.
"...What?" Everyone chorused.
The now-happy woman nodded. "You know, I believe the last time we ever did that was during our marriage ceremony... it reminds me of those wonderful days," said she absently. "When we were so young, and flourishing..."
"So... the, ahem, kiss meant nothing?" Isadora asked, bewildered.
Louise rolled her eyes. "Oh, of course not! I could have taken as many as I could at any time, really—though I really shouldn't be saying all this, I'll be embarrassing us both." She laughed girlishly.
"Whatever you say, my dear," Pent assented graciously. "So...you forgive me now?" he asked hopefully.
"I think I shall just say 'for the meantime'," she replied cheerily, "so you might just want to think of something else creative, my dear."
Raven shuddered. "Bewitched I am, if I ever marry," said he to Lucius, the latter fiddling with his hair.
"Damn!"
"Huh? What's the matter, Lucius?"
"Oh, nothing really, Lord Raymond. I think I just pulled my hair a bit too hard," Lucius explained with a fake smile, the palm of his hand showing strands of blond hair.
Author's Note: Needless to say, I really am sorry for the terrible update interval this time, since Crazy Happenings hasn't actually been updated for the past one year. Hopefully my ideas haven't become crappy after the rust! And I'll try not to write too much in a chapter until it becomes too long and too much of a bore to read.
I hope past readers still remember this story, though :P Thank you so, so much to all reviewers so far! They really do inspire me on so much. Any advice, comments, suggestions and ideas are most welcome! And if you readers might want any special bit inserted into the story, just let me know, and I'll see what I can do.
Stay in tuned for the next chapter, where Sain's punishments will be related to the rest of the crew, and see a detailed version of how they'll take it. XD