I'm really sorry for taking over two months to update! I've been busy with college, you see. Still, rest assured that I will not abandon a story once I start it! Yes, I did start a new One Piece story, which you may read if you wish, but, like I've told you before, I try to give priority to this one if I do have the inspiration to work on it. (That's actually what I've done just now) Dedicated to Saiumi for her sweet review and for favoriting! To all of you, who cheer me with your reviews, thanks a million! I thank you for your patience too! *Bows*
Acceptance
So he had entered the room. Still, he didn't want to be there, but he couldn't leave since S was on the other side of that door. Between the only two females (actually the only beings at all) that had been beyond his understanding, he preferred to deal with the one that was asleep; that should make iher slightly easier to deal with…
Ulquiorra brought his hand to his throat's hole. It ached. He wasn't sure if it was 'the S effect' or something different. If the latter, he had no clue what the cause could be. He really felt like a prisoner. Each time, it was harder to deny he was S's mercy, and sometimes he wondered if she had any mercy at all. That, he couldn't tell; he never could with S.
'I should be able to escape from this grasp yet I can't…' Why did I think that? – Ulquiorra pondered.
Ulquiorra stared at Orihime's resting form. Her forehead was sweaty and her lips dry. For the moment, he recognized S was right about one thing. Their minds had reset for that time travel, but their bodies didn't. It was turning noticeable she was losing weight; that could only happen after having been subject to a poor diet, which was her own doing, after longer than the time she had supposedly been held prisoner.
Some time while he gazed at Orihime, he had forgotten about his previous train of thoughts, until the pain in his neck thumped again. His eyes were then only half open as a grimacing gesture. He brought his hand to his throat's void space.
This damn hole was never meant to be in you. – S's words replayed in his memory, while he stared at his right hand on top of his hole.
What did you mean with that, S?
Then, he looked at Orihime again. Unlike him, a metaphorical prisoner, she had been let known in every possible way she explicitly was a prisoner, someone at the mercy of Aizen's whims and someone who was, most likely, going to be killed once she was no longer of use. If he felt uneasy at the thought of having two masters, how did that far fragiler girl feel?
Did you have a sensation as unpleasant as I? – He asked her telepathically.
He brought the hand on his hole to his temple. What am I doing? First I make unnecessary contact with her, going as far as touching her sweaty brow, filled with all kinds of unclean substances, and now this?
Ulquiorra paused his track right that instant. He recalled S's insinuations of him being Orihime Inoue's prisoner. Was this what she meant?!
That's absurd…! – He tried denying his own realizations, acting irrationally, just like that woman had said. – This is absurd. She's doing no effort to make me her subject. She can't be my captor. She's not defined as one. This human is just like every other trash there is in the Human Realm; there's nothing special about her. She's not strong…
He had to trail off right there. He detected his own lie immediately. Had he not said before she was strong-willed? Had he not admitted before he could not understand her, unlike the other predictable humans? Why was he lying to himself now? That was illogical. He was not being himself; he was being…Human?
All this stubbornness of yours to refuse accepting feelings and emotions as part of you due to 'them being for humans'? – S's words came to him yet again and with even greater force than before.
Ulquiorra sat down on the couch. He was beginning to dread S's appearances. She always made him see what he didn't want to see. He didn't feel he knew himself anymore. He was not sure what or who he was supposed to be. He had been proven to have emotions and to be a prisoner while all his life, as far as he could remember, he considered himself purely logical and someone else's captor, an Arrancar, Espada, non-human; now it seemed the opposite.
What is going on? What does S want from me? I still don't know. What is the renowned favor I supposedly did to her? If she is paying me back for a favor, why is she making feel this way?
Ulquiorra was the one-question-at-a-time type. Each question, he answered orderly. He found having so many questions that he had even lost count of them while barely having any answers aggravating and unpleasant. In truth, the few answers he had gotten were yet to be understood by him. So far, he only knew S wanted him to form some humane-like relationship with the human who lied sick nearby.
His eyes diverted in Orihime's direction once more. Half closing his eyes, he stood up and stood next to her bed and saw her sleeping again.
He canvassed her every feature once more. He could even se her eyelashes were short but curled upwards, her lips very full, her nose small and round and her hair looked red in the darkness. Orihime Inoue was a pretty girl; not even he would question that. Despite her sickly condition, she still shone, though palely. Ulquiorra was not very familiar with sunlight, so he didn't know Orihime looked her best under sunshine.
He had first convinced himself he was only doing duty, although he was aware hardly anything he had done recently was because of duty. However, with the minutes and then hours passing off as he still overanalyzed her every feature, it became undeniable he was not bored and that he was doing it for a reason other than duty. What the reason for his actions was was beyond his knowledge.
He finally broke free of his trance when she moaned. She was sweating more than before and the cloth on her forehead that had previously been part of his sleeve was dry at that point. He took it to dip it in the water bowl and again placed it on her hot brow. In the process, he had direct contact with her humanly warm skin. A sudden smile formed on Orihime's exhausted face at the soothing feeling of Ulquiorra's skin, which was about 10 degrees Celsius lower than the average human temperature. Ulquiorra got entranced by the smile her chapped lips formed and kept his hand in place. Once he realized his hand had replaced the cloth, he was doubtful. He wasn't sure why his hand hesitated to move. He took it a way from her burning skin only two seconds before he placed it back. For some reason, his hand had felt strange when he removed it.
This is ridiculous. – He berated himself inwardly. – Why would I do something like this? Why that woman says it's more irrational to avoid doing this laughable is beyond me…
He would not admit it, or even realize it, but he required too much time to just take back his hand. He attempted to move it once more and he could. Four seconds later, Orihime's smile was undone as the source of her relief was gone. His hand itched because of that. It made no sense to him that her merely undoing her somewhat peaceful smile during her sleep could affect him, but one seldom gets affected only by things within his understanding. Another four seconds after that, she moaned unconsciously, as if asking him to put his hand back there. Without even thinking about it, he did so. She didn't smile again, but the peace she felt during relief was present in her sleeping face.
What did I just do? Why did I do that? So this woman wanted me to place my hand in her forehead, which barely makes sense since she obviously doesn't want me close to her while awake. Why would that make me do something like this? (…) Is this what S meant when she said she was my captor and I her prisoner? – He mused again.
He wasn't moving before, so it wasn't easy to tell Ulquiorra froze at that thought. Him wanting to see her smile in her sleep, him having tried so hard to understand her (even though he was practically being forced to do it), him being intrigued by this human girl; what it all mean? Did that mean he really wanted to have a relationship with her? Wasn't that only what S wanted? Unknown to that girl, he was her prisoner. In a different sense too, he was S's prisoner as well. He was a prisoner at the mercy of two women. One expressed it in every possible way, many times humiliating too, and the other one was not even trying. What had happened to him? It was as if emotions and feelings were taking over him… Am I…Turning…Human?
He immediately removed his hand as if her forehead had gotten too hot for his hand all of a sudden. This time, he paid no heed to Orihime's grimacing.
-I can't do this S. – He said out loud. – I refuse to go continue this any further.
He knew she was listening, but he didn't know he'd get an immediate response.
Suddenly, lines began to be drawn magically in the wall before him and eventually took the form of a door. The drawn door opened a real one in the wall through which S entered.
Her expression immediately made Ulquiorra's hand, hot from contact with Orihime, cover his hole as it instantly recalled the pain from their last meeting hours ago. S's blue eyes were not amused. In fact, she looked inspired fear. Ulquiorra could not walk away. Something told him he would not be able to overcome the following moments easily. That was, of course, if his sanity survived yet another blow.
S glanced quickly at Orihime and then proceeded to sit in the same bed by her feet.
Ulquiorra noted her new outfit. She wore scrubs right under a white coat with flat shoes, a stethoscope around her nape and her hair in a ponytail.
Her eyes were fixated on Ulquiorra in such a way that they injected a paralyzing substance to him so he could not escape. In truth, though, that was the S effect on Ulquiorra, the same that explained her being the captor and mind while he was the prisoner and body.
-I have not even said a word yet and you're already trying to run away from what I'll say, Ulquiorra. – Her voice came out softly but with a deadly air to it. – That means you realize what you said was not smart in the least, correct?
Ulquiorra could hardly talk with his void stinging, and that was nonsensical for there was no mass there to sting in the first place.
-S… - He spoke hoarsely and very softly as he tried to get used to the sensation. – I can't do this anymore.
-What would 'this' be, Ulquiorra? Establishing communication with Orihime Inoue? Facing your own emotions and feelings? You realized you're not whom you thought and you can't handle the pain? Just what, Ulquiorra?! – Her voice tone, contrastingly to his, was ascending uniformly.
-Everything you said and more. – Ulquiorra answered. – I do not want to become who you want me to be, S.
S stood up abruptly, taking him aback. She glared at him. Was she going to hold him by the throat again?
-You do not even know who you are in truth, Ulquiorra Schiffer. You lost all your memories from your life before being an Espada, a pet beast of Aizen Shosuke. You don't have a single memory as an actual hollow before being shinigaminized by the cursed Hogyoku. Other than the mask you're wearing now and that damn hole in your throat, you have nothing else to be sure you ever were a Hollow! – S shouted, miraculously not waking up Orihime in the process.
Her eyes suddenly changed. She closed them to calm down before looking at Ulquiorra again. Ulquiorra was stunned, not sure of what to think not only concerning her words, but her unpredictable burst. She brought a hand to her temple. She had been pushing her patience's limits for quite a while already. She took a deep breath and recovered part of her cool.
For some reason, Ulquiorra found it hard to believe a woman like her could act that way. Like him, S could resemble a human too.
-It is not whom I'm trying to turn you into. You are yourself, Ulquiorra, and I cannot change who you are; I'm not God. The you of now is still you; it has always been and it will always be.
S obviously shrugged off her previous outrage. He had no choice but to play along…For now.
-I feel human, S.
-Hadn't we already gone through that, Ulquiorra?
-S, I am not asking your permission. – Ulquiorra mustered will to say that. – I am letting you know the truth. I doubt I would find any mythological happiness this way.
-Mythological happiness… – S sighed, exhausted already. – OK, I don't have the energy to cover that topic right now, so moving on… Compared to the image you have of whom you should be thanks to your cursed hole, how are humans any worse than that? Compared to someone who lives a dull life as a disposable puppet, has no knowledge of something as basic and important as emotions and reactions, is unable to aim to anything in life because he's not even alive, has no reason to exist other than serving, cannot even dream of experiencing a glimpse of 'mythological happiness' and undergoes constant insecurity about who or what he really is and always getting a void as an answer, any worse than being human, Ulquiorra Schiffer, Cuarta Espada?
Ulquiorra could not speak back, like it happened most of the times S talked to him with direct words he could not escape from for the life of him. He was supposed to be dead, though.
No… I can't just be a captive soul… I am not!
Ulquiorra could see through S's eyes. He knew she had heard his thoughts but she would still not say anything. She was still expecting an answer from him, or rather demanding it. The seconds flew out of the barred window while the two of them stood next to Orihime's bed and she would not fold.
-You said it yourself, S. I'm not supposed to exist anymore as I was defeated by that human shinigami. You won't tell me where I will go either. S, why are you insisting in me changing now that I've met my end? What will change in the end, S? I might no longer be a Hollow if we speak technically, but my mask fragment and the hole under my throat you despise are still here. – He proceeded to point to his hole to make an emphasis he knew beforehand S would not appreciate. – S, I won't pull through this anymore. I won't ever understand this woman. Apparently I cannot even understand myself. I'll just resign myself…
Ulquiorra was forced to stop talking when S's hand slapped his left cheek. This was the difference between her and Inoue Orihime. Both Inoue Orihime and S could land a hand on him because of two different spells. One spellbinded him with her eyes and strong will and the other one with her overpowering words, mystery and her previously explained authority as his capturer.
S had finally lost it. Orihime's fragile hands couldn't be compared to the far greater force of S's hand. S managed to make him take not one but two steps back and leaned his torso just above Orihime. Ulquiorra closed his left eye in a grimacing gesture and the one he kept open had nowhere to look but in the way to the sleeping sick beauty.
He was about to straighten himself, turn to S and face her with courage he didn't know he had. He was going to tell her he would not listen to her anymore, even if that meant she herself would kill him…But it was S's words themselves what stopped him. It only took four words, her four words and no one else's.
-How disappointingly pathetic, Ulquiorra.
Her voice had emerged so cold, deadly, disappointed, angered and sad Ulquiorra dared not move to look at her. If her voice sounded like that, he didn't want to venture imagining what she looked like, what her hurt big deep blue eyes would look at him like.
-I won't let you lie to me, trying to sound so noble with your 'I won't ever understand this woman' crap. 'What will change in the end, S?' Bullshit.
Ulquiorra could not believe S knew how to be foulmouthed. He must have upsetted her greatly… Yes, that was what had happened. It wasn't just that time; all along as this 'trial' had been lasting, he had constantly aimed at her patience and reasons… Of course she had snapped.
-I'll spell it for you if you haven't figured it out, which is the most likely thing! You are not resigning yourself; you're submitting to fear! You're being a coward, Ulquiorra Schiffer, and fear is the worst captor for any prisoner to have. You can understand this girl, you can, but that is just not going to happen so long as you keep denying your true feelings! You thought what you were doing was laughable, and yes, it certainly was and I won't say I didn't laugh. So what? People get laughed at often, and only the weak give up for that. Being subject to fear is worse than laughable, it's pitiable, pathetic. 'What will change in the end?' is in fact something else. What you said in reality was 'I am afraid of changing'. 'I won't ever understand this woman' means 'The closer I am to understanding her, the more I see of myself that changes the concept I had of who I am.' 'My mask fragment and the hole under my throat you despise are still here' translates to 'I need to emphasize I am a Hollow, I'll even point at my hole; I'll do it as long as that means I can't be human'.
S paused to let her words sink into Ulquiorra. Like she had said, he definitely hadn't figured that out. Ulquiorra wanted to shake his head but couldn't. His own body was begging him to stop lying. He kept looking at Orihime with S's voice resonating in his head. It was he who had been slapped but it sounded heartbreaking, as if he had been the one to crush her hopes and glee.
-S… - Ulquiorra spoke huskily while still not fixing his posture, not daring to, not wanting to see her.
Why does it ache?
-My question still stands, Ulquiorra. Compared to who you have been, compared to living like this, afraid of so much, even of who you might be, and having to suppress that fear behind a hole and mask, how is being human any worse?
-…I…
-Look at me, Ulquiorra. – S's voice softened radically.
Ulquiorra turned to S, finally seeing what he had done. He was incapable of lying now that those blue eyes were on him; he could hardly breathe.
-I… - Ulquiorra whispered hoarsely, still trying to say something he inwardly knew was not true, lying, much like a human.
Their looks entwined. Ulquiorra's words trailed away. S would not let him look another way but to her. Ulquiorra then realized S was doing nothing; it was he who could not turn away from her.
-I am not going to let you put all your effort to waste, Ulquiorra. – She narrowed her eyes determined. – Especially because you are not thinking straight; you cannot even utter a proper sentence.
-I haven't been able to think straight since the very beginning of this whole incoherent madness!
-'Incoherent madness'? Is that what you call this, Ulquiorra?
If Ulquiorra didn't know her, he would say she sounded almost resentful.
Why do I have this unpleasant sensation that I did wrong to her when I was the one physically affected?
-Fine, call it whatever you please. It doesn't change the fact that this is a trial. I warned you it was not going to be easy. You have thought all these hours that I did not give you another choice but to comply with this all…But, Ulquiorra, I am only returning the favor to you Ulquiorra. You are just afraid.
-I am not afraid. – Ulquiorra lied, and he knew it was a lie.
-There's nothing wrong with being afraid. You have not realized, have you? When I said that something different from Soul Society and Hell awaits you, I meant it. You have not made the connection, have you, Ulquiorra? And you're supposed to be smart…
Even when she tells me something this serious she is mocking me. - Ulquiorra thought. – She enjoys it but yet she isn't lying about doing this for me either…
He could hardly believe it, but it wasn't as if he could easily accept anything S had done so far…
-Ulquiorra, you won't die after this trial is over. – S continued. - As I've repeated to you before and will again, whatever awaits you after this depends on this. That is the favor I am paying for you, the best thing I could think of, the only thing I could do for you that is remotely close to what you did for me.
Ulquiorra felt himself slowly being pushed towards S, as if there were an attraction field around her. He was being absorbed and he was falling for it again. Those eyes looked sincere enough. Even if he told her he could not believe her, he truly believed those blue orbs and could not even muster enough shamelessness as to question whether she was just acting. S was a cosplayer, not an actress…Was she?
Why do I feel that I have seen those eyes many times before when I haven't? Why do I feel like this is a déjà vu? Just who is S and what used to be my relationship with her? What is this favor she always talks about?
Still, even after that, Ulquiorra didn't want to admit she was right, to accept he was afraid, not of changing, but of having been human all along.
-There's no need to be afraid. – S continued, recovering her usual countenance. – You are not a bad person, Ulquiorra; you've never been.
Ulquiorra was at last set free from the spell that imprisoned his body like iron and turned his head. Any direction was fine for him as long as S was not in sight. He turned to his right to once again see Orihime. It was unconscious and unplanned. He didn't feel like seeing her either…But that gave him an idea.
-S. – He called.
S narrowed her eyes. She knew what was coming, what his mind was thinking.
-You had never before appeared with this woman present.
-And you continue calling her 'woman'. – S interrupted.
Unexpectedly, Ulquiorra paid no mind to her words. S sighed inwardly. She had hoped she'd deviate his thoughts but he was set on speaking his mind… So be it. – She thought.
-Shouldn't you be the one fearing for her to see you? She could wake up suddenly and I might tell her what this is all about. I might tell her this is a repetition of events, that her friends came and got hurt, that she never stood a chance to fight, that Kurosaki Ichigo has changed as he wears a Hollow mask. I might tell her any of those or all of them.
Interesting employment of 'might', Ulquiorra. – S mused, grinning inside, already seeing a way to 'put him in his place' one more time… - Let's see if you can say that again…
S chuckled.
-She's asleep, Ulquiorra.
-I might wake her up.
There it is again. – S smiled discreetly, knowing Ulquiorra had just handed her victory unknowingly…And this time, her victory would be on a major battle that could determine the result of the war.
S let her smile be noticed by him, which confused him. He didn't see how his words had had the opposite effect of the desired one. How had he made her grin and laugh when he was threatening to end her game called 'trial'?
-And she's supposed to believe you? She doesn't even seem to be able to open her eyes yet and I doubt her thinking faculties are at their peak, Ulquiorra… - She paused a second; she was about to 'check' him. – I find it interesting that you are using 'might' instead of 'will'. Do you not, Ulquiorra?
Ulquiorra could say no more. S's grin became even more evident.
-You can't move. That is because you know what that means, don't you? You are aware what the lack of confidence in future actions indicates.
-It is just a word, S. – Ulquiorra weakly and futilely tried to dissent.
-Words mean everything, Ulquiorra Schiffer! – She exclaimed. – It is because of that little word that we know you unconsciously acknowledge it's your inner desire to understand Orihime Inoue! You've accepted your true feelings already, Ulquiorra Schiffer.
Ulquiorra was yet to understand how his legs could still support his weight. Every one of his cells paralyzed.
I…
-Your own bodily reactions which you find strange are in fact pleas you are making to yourself to admit the truth and lift this unnecessary burden off you already! This is no longer this evil witch's plan. You, Ulquiorra Schiffer, do want to understand the girl in this bed; it has always been a desire of your own, and, at this point, you just cannot live on denying it…
Her voice talked graver than he had heard before; her staring eyes were bewitching, profound, and their victory was imminent.
-So admit it, Ulquiorra. – She stated simply.
Ulquiorra took a forced deep breath. He wanted to break free…
-How do I know it is not your doing? – He questioned. – You've made use of nothing but words so far; your own words. You could have manipulated me just now, or all along, for me to act this way; it wouldn't have been a challenge to you…
S curled one side of her mouth upwards in a smirk.
-You used to pride yourself in being a submissive servant of Aizen, but you actually like being rebellious, Ulquiorra.
All of a sudden, S closed the distance between them with just a couple of steps and slightly leaned her frame taller than his although she wore no heals. Her eyes were then at the same level as his and only centimeters away. He wasn't able of escaping before that. Now, he was literally her prisoner.
-Maybe. – S answered his question simpering. – That is an interesting hypothesis. Unfortunately for your nerves, it is false. I cannot manipulate feelings, Ulquiorra. As you said, words are my tools. All I've done is influence you to see the desire you couldn't before, which you neglected until your very end. That's all.
Ulquiorra's heart skipped a beat. S had read his mind when he died? She knew exactly what his thoughts had been? Who is S?
-The mission this 'incoherent madness' has given you is your own wish. That's a fact at this point.
-It is not. – Ulquiorra contradicted.
Ulquiorra attempted to gaze down, not wishing to bear the sight of those eyes to which, for some reason, he just could not lie to. Furthermore, he felt incapable of hurting those eyes again; he didn't want to, even though he himself was placed in this situation by those very same eyes. The reason why was beyond him.
-Yes it is.
As her voice talked, S used her hand to lift Ulquiorra's face from the chin, causing his eyes to look straight at her once again.
-If that were not true, you would have not come this far, you wouldn't be feeling this way and you would not be so stubborn in denying it since you wouldn't feel threatened or even care about this… Moreover, you are yet to deny it, Ulquiorra.
-I have denied almost everything you've cornered me into, S. – Ulquiorra spoke bluntly under her powerful hypnotization.
-You have denied a lot of things during this trial; we both know that all too well, Ulquiorra Schiffer, but not once have you said you did not want to understand her.
-Yes I have.
-No, you haven't.
Silence was the next reply. While Ulquiorra was enraptured almost against his will, S could see a lot of things happening in Ulquiorra's green eyes too. For several hours in Hueco Mundo's perpetual night, S had seen those eyes judge her, question her, accuse her, look at her with confusion, denial, pain, shock, disbelief, curiosity and, mostly, uncertainty.
-I dare you to say it, then, this very instant. – S defied.
-I do not… - Ulquiorra began when his eyes tried to look an angle below.
-Say it while looking at me in the eyes, Ulquiorra. – S's tone went up a pitch. – I told you I do not like lies. Don't you dare lie to me, for I'll know when you do, and you are perfectly aware of that.
Ulquiorra turned to her. He remained quiet for an entire minute. With his eyes, he admitted defeat.
S's eyes softened and backed away to give him some space. Her hand holding his chin, however, turned him in Orihime's directions for him to look at her next.
Ulquiorra's eyes undergoing pain and confusion softened too at the sight of Orihime. His entire visage changed in seconds. Orihime was a healer; sometimes, just her sight was enough to cure affliction.
S let go of his chin and then walked behind him, leaning slowly to his ear and whispered softly.
-Give in, Ulquiorra. Stop fighting a war even more useless than those of countries and armies. While doing the right thing is not always wise, a stubborn soul is not admirable when fighting a cause that isn't just lost, but also purposeless; that is not just unwise, but also deadly. You're doing no good to yourself. There are things that are within our power to avoid, but this is not one of them. Surrender to the sweet and tempting tranquility. Once you accept this as your own wish, I guarantee you'll feel calmer, less frustrated, less pain. Only then will you have any chance of success in achieving this trial's mission. Admitting…Accepting your own feelings seems like the rational thing do to in this case, doesn't it, Ulquiorra?
Ulquiorra turned to S. His eyes had too much shock to contain, so he let his whole face express it.
S grinned amused and gleeful.
She proceeded to walk to the couch in the room. S looked somewhat tired, and that was very understandable; needless to say why. Nonetheless, she smiled and seemed to be humming a tune softly. She closed her eyelids to rest her eyes. Perhaps he wasn't the only one who felt worn out for exchanging glances in that particular manner. S looked peaceful, somehow.
Unbelievable…Well, that'd be an appropriate word for most people when displaying thus a lax attitude after having spoken so intensely, with so much power. Nevertheless, it was S Ulquiorra was thinking about. Deeply, he knew he should not be surprised.
An odd image came to his mind at the sight of her, like a long lost memory, a déjà vu. This is the first time I see her this way. Why would I feel like I've seen S like this before?
She suddenly took off her shoes and put her legs up in the couch. Much to his surprise, her toenails were black like his own nails were. He shouldn't be surprised about her personality, but about that, he certainly could be.
-S. – Ulquiorra called.
S opened her eyes immediately and turned to him with an inquiring hum and a friendly grin.
-Who are you? – He enquired. – Or rather, who were you?
He was sure her grin would fade and she'd roll her eyes at him, tell him 'For the umpteenth time, I cannot tell you that, Ulquiorra Schiffer' or something akin to that. Belike, she'd also accompany her reply with a sly comment to mock him, which she seemed to enjoy doing and he would just let her since his mind would be too confused and messed up and he'd get a headache if he had yet another argument with her without a break after their prior one…But Ulquiorra was proved wrong. Instead, S kept her grin on. She slowly closed her eyelids again. Rather than looking at him as if he were helpless (and he could certainly be most of the time, so had she proven), she looked sad for not being able to answer him. Were Ulquiorra's eyes so exhausted they were playing tricks on him?
-I'm afraid the time for you to know that has not yet come. – S replied.
She immediately afterwards opened her eyes and looked his way again. A shiver traveled down his back. S let out a soft brief laugh. Maybe she was more tired than her outward appearance would let him know.
-Was that your way of asking about my black toenails, Ulquiorra? – Her voice sounded teasing.
Ulquiorra didn't reply.
S turned away, not letting him see her face. However, he could sense her smile was gone. She placed on the couch's arm support her arms and then her head on top of them with her face pointing right. All he could see was the white coat over her back.
-You seemed to be so stubbornly refusing to accept the remnants of your humanity, clinging so hard to your ideal Hollow image… - S's voice was so soft her words sounded more like a mumble. – You just don't realize how lucky you are to have humanity in you…You don't know what awaits you, Ulquiorra… However, it is not the same for me. I happen to be closer to that concept you have of Hollows. I happen to be bound to this place called Hueco Mundo for eternity or until my life meets its end, whichever happens first. If I had the humane essence you have, I'd be happy, you know?
S went quiet. Ulquiorra was immobile again. His mouth's lips parted but no words did. What was he supposed to say? He didn't even have a clue as to how to react.
S… Something saddens her? She's not happy? But how could she if she gives the feeling she's happy and amused all the time?
S only grew more mysterious with time. Ulquiorra had 1000% more chances of getting to understand Orihime Inoue before getting a clue about who S really was and what was inside of her. He wanted to see inside of her too, like she could see through him without censorship.
He needed to sit. So he sat in Orihime's bed and turned to her. She still slept. She was sweaty and still had a fever, but she still seemed tranquil, immune to the effect the conversation that took place in that cell room. How enviable.
He damped the cloth and replaced it on her forehead before sensing a pair of eyes looking at his back.
He slowly turned to the woman in the couch. She had moved to the opposite end of the couch and sat with one leg crossed, her chin propped up by her right arm with her elbow on top of the couch's side, her ponytail over her left shoulder and a smile one wouldn't guess could be possible in someone who minutes ago seemed as down as her.
Ulquiorra wanted to enquire about that, but thought better not to. He didn't want to see S like that again. He didn't know why, but he knew he didn't like that sight.
-Why are you dressed like a physician? – He asked belatedly.
-Because I'm in front of Orihime – San, who's sick. Hence, it's more appropriate to look like a doctor than a nurse. – She responded.
Ulquiorra, uncharacteristically, arched an eyebrow, truthfully expressing his dissatisfaction with her answer.
S chortled at Ulquiorra; that was more like her.
-You have no sense of humor, Ulquiorra. – She at last gave him a mean comment; it took her a while to do that. – Oh well, I can't say you ever had that much humor to begin with. I'm not trying to change who you really were and still are down there, so I guess that's just alright.
He didn't know what to reply to that.
S put on her shoes again and turned to look at him without any apparent resent for anything that he had accused her of in that while.
-Do remember to laugh every now and then, though. – She commented.
-S, why do you cosplay at all? – Ulquiorra asked bluntly; he had been wondering about that for a good deal of time by then.
S turned to him and all she did was send him a smile wearing her enigmatic eyes which he could not decipher yet despite seeing them so closely, more closely than he was comfortable with.
Without saying another word, she left using the magic door she had used to enter before.
He never knew how long she had been in that cell room.
Is she going to avoid answering that question too? – Ulquiorra pondered.
I hope this made up for my delay. If you ask me, this is the most intense chapter I've written for this story so far. I bet you're glad you didn't lose faith in me! I'm happy you all like S. S quickly gained my own heart. I love her and have plans for her to appear in KISA too. I see some of you did try to guess the character that inspired me in creating S. The closest guess was C.C. from Code Geass. In fact, I did base something about S taking C.C. in consideration, but not her attitude. The character I'm challenging you to disclose is that who I used as a model for S's personality. Is anyone willing to try? You may try again if you wish. This is your last chance. Next chapter, I'll be revealing the answer… I feel like a TV host of some sort of show! *Laughs*