Chapter 5

Ulquiorra opened his eyes, slowly realizing that he was still in her room and in her bed. As the last of his drowsiness wore off, he sat up and looked out of the window seeing that it was almost dawn. What would she say to him when she woke up? Would she smile modestly and thank him for the time they spent together? Would she continue pretending that he was with Rei and treat him like an acquaintance? Unacceptable. He was not her escape route from depression and the memories of Hueco Mundo. He would not allow her to think of him as nothing more than that. Ulquiorra did not want her gratitude and the pseudo friendship she was offering. He did not want her sympathy and understanding that he suffered too. He wanted Inoue Orihime to love him, to need him, to want him. Just like he loved, needed, and wanted her.

He ran a hand through his hair in frustration letting it drop on his bent knee. Realizing his feelings wasn't the worst part of it; he could've still ignored them and moved on with his life. He was always good at pretending. But, realizing what he actually wanted out of this mess made his hair stand on edge. Pining after a woman and acting like a lovesick fool was not for him, especially if that woman had no desire to love him back. Still, here he was, a former Espada, what a joke, ready to hand himself over to her for the sake of an emotion. He knew that coming to her apartment was a mistake; he knew that she would suck him in and he would not be able to resist it. And he was already getting edgy as he saw her coming out of her bedroom wearing those outrageous garments, and making him stand rooted in place as his reason and emotions waged an unseen war. Then she said that nonsense about love and how she would feel it for some fool, or the right person as she skillfully worded it, and something snapped. Was the woman completely blind to everything around her? Yes, he wanted to know about this love, to understand the limit to this insanity that completely pulled him in without so much as a warning, but what he did not want was for her talking about loving another. Yes, he was selfish. He was always selfish, even when he watched her in Hueco Mundo casting sad looks and telling him about hearts and friends and how they came to save her. Nobody could save her from him and he did his worst to prove it to her. And he was also selfish when he drew his sword at Kurosaki Ichigo after he broke through the floor. And he was selfish now because he wanted to share her with no one.

But the woman was strong. Despite everything that he told her, she was still bold enough to grab him and pull him into a kiss. That's when he felt his control slipping, yet it also made everything clear and he finally understood what he wanted from her. But, there was also the bitter truth that these feelings were only his and she might never return them. If that happened, then maybe, for the sake of keeping his sanity, one day his love would be able to subside, but, right now he wanted her, all of her, without holding back, without reservations. He wanted it all and he would never settle for less, not with her.

Ulquiorra turned his head looking at Orihime's sleeping figure. She had her back to him with her hair spread on the pillow and a thin sheet barely covering her curves. Inconceivable. Even in her sleep the woman had the capacity to arouse him. He closed his eyes remembering the events of just a few hours ago when he twisted his fingers through those locks pulling on them and watching tiny drops of sweat making them cling to her skin. Just a few hours ago he traced his mouth down her neck never stopping there, and she looked at him with longing and desire, and moaned his name as soon as he gently bit her soft skin. Last night she offered herself to him and gave him something that nobody else would ever have and he snatched it like it was his for the taking. Perhaps, another man would've been reluctant to do this, he would've been more sensitive and understanding of a girl with so little experience, but Ulquiorra wasn't that man. He wasn't a gentleman and he wasn't kind. He knew what he wanted and he wanted her, never looking back, regretting nothing.

But Orihime did not feel the same, and he understood it cursing her for having so much power over him, yet, she still gave him the one thing that no other man would ever possess. And Ulquiorra felt a strange sense of pride by taking it from her. It was probably petty of him to gloat, she still wasn't his, but it gave him certain satisfaction hearing her groan in pain as he pushed himself inside of her for the very first time. He hurt her, but then the pain was gone followed by slow and steady rhythms making her grab on to him, digging her nails into his skin, and whispering his name as he increased his pace. She arched and sighed squeezing her legs tighter around him, and he kept thrusting and kissing and touching her until she begged him for release. For just that one precious moment he was the only thing she saw and clung to. For just one instant, he was her god, her savior, her everything.

The sun finally rose sending faint rays of light to illuminate the room. It was his cue to leave and Ulquiorra quietly got up picking up his clothes scattered on the floor. Undoubtedly, she would think of him when she woke up but he would not be here for her convenience. Despite his fears and doubts, and the creeping thoughts that told him to stay and to make sure that she knew whom she belonged to, the woman had to make the decision on her own. He couldn't force her even if he wanted to. She had to come to him willingly wanting and longing even if it was a fraction of what he felt. Would she regret it or seek him out even more? Would her feelings change? He did not know. If somehow she still refused him even after what transpired between them tonight, then he would release his hold on her. Despite his passions, he had no intention of forcing her, although the possibility of rejection was infuriating. But if Orihime decided she wanted to continue for the reasons he very much desired, she knew where to find him. And when she did, he would lay out his terms leaving no more room for speculation.

Waking up in an empty bed certainly did not fix the feeling of anxiety when she found out that he was gone. And they only kept piling up as days and night followed without so much as a phone call or a ring on the door. But what did she expect? A warm reception? Kissing and snuggling after the night that culminated the loss of her innocence would've been nice, and something like that would've probably happened with a normal guy. But Ulquiorra wasn't normal and neither was he nice. He made her hot and cold, shiver with pleasure, beg for mercy, and experience something that she could not explain with words. Despite his usual distant attitude, last night she saw the kind of fire that he had never shown her before. And he knew exactly where to touch her. And touch her he did, and kiss her and…. Oh lord. Orihime covered her face with her hands feeling the familiar sensation rise in her stomach.

That night at her apartment, Orihime wanted to ask him a lot of things, make everything clear between them so there would be no more misunderstandings, yet her resolve gave out the moment he came to stand behind her, having her feel his breath on her neck, sending strange sensations down her spine. And when she turned around, he stared at her with those pools of green that she wasn't able to look away from. There was something strange in the way he looked at her. She couldn't quite tell whether it was anger or lust, but it made her shiver with anticipation wanting to reach out for more.

Yet, there was also something that she couldn't quite explain. He hated her and loved her with enough vehemence to leave a trace of doubt that there might've been something that she missed, something that she should've seen from the start. That, perhaps, his guise of coldness and resentment meant to send her a different message. It was difficult to conceive that his hatred would lead him to her door and allow him to touch and kiss her with such fervor. All kinds of thoughts started to find their way into her head, speculations of a mystery that she had yet to solve. Could it be that he actually...?

"Hey you!" she spun around seeing Rei walking into her direction.

"Long time no see!" the brunette said cheerfully, "How have you been?"

Orihime felt a pang in her chest, the feeling of guilt that was bound to happen after the cobwebs blew away and she started thinking clearly again. This was her friend and she betrayed her, she was the other woman, the traitor, someone that she never thought she would ever become. What if Rei found out about what happened with Ulquiorra? What if he told her everything? He wasn't the one to beat around the bush and Orihime dreaded the idea that he would decide to come forward with this. There was no plausible explanation to excuse any of it and she had no idea how to justify herself, but Rei didn't seem angry and just stood there grinning at her.

"I am ok." Orihime tried to put up a smile.

"You look kind of out of it. Want to do something after class?"

"No, I can't. Finals are coming up so I need to study."

"Don't you know how to have any fun?"

"Hey! I have fun. I just don't want my grades to drop. And you should do the same."

"Meeh, you're such a spoilsport." Rei said opening her cell phone. "Let's see if Ulqi—" but changed her mind and put it back into her pocket.

"What's the matter?" Orihime asked.

"Forget him, I'm gonna ask someone else."

"Won't Ulquiorra get angry?"

"Yeah, whatever."

Orihime gave her a puzzled look.

"He barely calls me. I haven't heard from him in over a week. I don't know what he does and where he goes. This is getting ridiculous."

"I'm sorry." Orihime's voice was close to a whisper. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't know." Rei shook her head, "The guy is hot and everything, but I just don't think there is anything here." she placed her hand on her chest. "Maybe he just went out with me on a whim, to see what happens."

"But you still like him, don't you?"

"Hm…" Rei looked at her curiously, "You are asking an awful lot of questions, what's with you?"

"Nothing," Orihime shook her head with more excitement than she had hoped to show, "You're my friend and I'm just worried about you."

"Well, that's cute. But there is nothing to worry about. I'm still not sure what I'd do about that jerk, but if this continues I might just…" she trailed off looking into the distance. "Hey, gotta go!"

Orihime watched her run off and join another group of people, then playfully smack some guy on the shoulder. Perhaps Rei was starting to give up on Ulquiorra and move on, and maybe she wouldn't be completely heartbroken if she found out that her friend betrayed her. Orihime contemplated about all sorts of possibilities in hopes that her relationship with Rei would remain unspoiled, yet she was still unsure about what to do with Ulquiorra. Her emotions were pulling her into many different directions. She wanted to confront him, yet she wanted to keep her dignity and not come across as clingy and needy, turning herself into someone he would despise. But his silence hurt her, adding to her insecurities and the idea that he had forgotten her.

Argh!

She had to snap out of it. There was probably an explanation for all of this. Maybe it would clear out later, at a better time. Right now she needed to concentrate on school and her studies and passing this term. Ulquiorra wasn't her captor anymore, so there wasn't a reason for her to feel nervous, yet...

Orihime clutched the strap of her school bag as she slowly approached the classroom, then, after finally releasing a shaky sigh, walked in expecting a pair of icy green eyes to meet hers. But, he wasn't there. More students poured in and another ten minutes passed, and there was still no sign of Ulquiorra.

"Have you seen the guy who sits next to me?" she asked one of her classmates.

"You mean Schiffer? Yeah, I heard he was in the science department."

"But we have a paper due today!"

"Maybe he turned it in early?"

Orihime shook her head in exasperation remembering herself fret all day over facing him again, and thinking of what to say to him, and he wasn't even here. Great.

The entire class was spent looking at her watch, impatiently tapping her foot, and doing anything but paying attention. It was a review session and she should've been more productive, but Orihime couldn't take her mind off of him. And worst of all, she really wanted an excuse to go see him.

Finally, the professor announced an early dismissal and passed out the review sheets. Mechanically, Orihime took two and gave the rest of the pile to the next student. Surely Ulquiorra needed to know what was going to be on the test, right? Then, she quickly stuffed her things into the bag and walked out of the classroom.

The science buildings were not very far away and with every reluctant step Orihime felt her resolve crumbling. Was she trying to get the truth out or to impose herself on him? What if the answer was already there after he hasn't contacted her since that night? When guys did it, that usually meant trouble, didn't it? But Ulquiorra wasn't like any of the other guys, was he?

"You are skipping class."

Thump.

Orihime stopped and turned her head to the side noticing Ulquiorra standing several feet away from her. That is what you get for not paying attention to what goes on around of you.

"I am not, the class ended early." she said trying to hide her shock, "And, look, I have a review sheet to give you for the final." she clumsily reached into her bag getting out a semi crumpled paper.

Ulquiorra started walking towards her with slow purposeful steps finally coming to stand in front of her as she held her breath watching him close the distance. Orihime felt giddy, excited, nervous, and worried altogether. Everything that she wanted to tell him suddenly evaporated leaving her mind completely blank, and she wasn't even upset anymore, just happy to see him. Yet, he did not seem pleased at all.

Ulquiorra took the paper from her. "Is this all?"

"Yes… I mean no. Is everything alright? Do you want to…ah….talk?" she asked in a jittery voice.

Woman, do you honestly believe everything is alright?

He looked at her with his usual scowl then turned around and started walking. "Come with me." He ordered over his shoulder.

"What's going on? Where are we going?"

"You said you wanted to talk."

"I know! But where are you taking me?"

"To a more private place. I do not want to be interrupted."

"We are at school. There isn't a lot of privacy here."

"Most of the classes have been dismissed early. The rooms will be empty for the rest of the day."

Without another word she followed him into the building only to see him stop at the first door and loudly open it for her. There was something strange about his behavior, he looked almost agitated and Orihime decided not to say anything and walked in only to hear him slam the door behind them. He threw his school bag on the nearest desk and looked at her putting his hands into his pockets.

Orihime ran a nervous hand through her hair then put her bag down as well. Ulquiorra did not move, but continued looking at her as if expecting an explanation to some unseen problem. What in the world was the matter with him?

"What were you doing in the science department?" she asked trying to keep her voice steady.

"Researching different majors."

"Oh, really? Are you thinking of changing yours?"

"Perhaps, I haven't decided yet."

"You always had a knack for complicated subjects. I'm sure you will do great."

"Are you quite finished with the small talk?" he asked taking a step forward.

Orihime caught her breath. There was something definitely off about him. Despite his normal cool demeanor, she noticed it in his eyes. There was no indifference in them, no coldness, but a strange spark of silent fury.