DISCLAIMER: I have purchased a brand new battleaxe. I am now broke, but happy. That's all I own though, everything else was sold to make way for the aquisition of this marvelous heavy sharp object with which I shall parade around frightening people for very little reason.
(I have returned from my holiday well-rested and minus about ten lesions in my hands - the healing is going well they tell me, and the smell of decaying flesh is lessening day by day so let's hear it for modern medicine! The natty silver rings stay in until there is no more angry red discolouration but they assure me that there is progress so huzzah for moi. Now, I should like to thank those of you who have been there for me during this difficult, creatively frustrating time, to all of you, thank you so very much, I am convinced that your support and in some cases virtual gifts and cookies have been instrumental in my recovery and I cannot thank you enough. Irual, I have been oh-so-good, and therefore I hope you are well, still remember who I am, and will enjoy this platform to greater hilarity. You are a star. Laceylou76, my little angel you've been marvellous so here's some fluffiness and I promise you, there will be epic Romy in the next update. After all, there've been promises, non? ^^ TitansRule, I'm afraid there's no Scooter-bashing in person here but there's a good deal of hatred directed towards him so that'll have to do ^^ I really hope you like this and please tell me if you see any flaws in my French grammar! Dragonfly422, here it is, the long awaited update! I hope you like this too^^ Ashmanda my darlin', here I am, back from the dead, bearing gifts and hoping to the Gods that you still love me because if not I'd just have ta sit my arse down and cry! Hope you're keepin' well sugah, Ah missed you somethin' awful! tfobmv18, here's the update, sorry for the holdup XD rogue-scholar-07 thankies and I hope you like this too! ANON! MY BABY! *attacks you and hugs you senseless then realises this may be embarrassing you* Ehem. I missed you. Is it showing? XD I hope you like this my dear, I tried my best for you... cougarrose47, thank you so very much, aren't you kind?? The answer is yes, yes you are, and I hope you enjoy this. Finally, my dear LadyMageLuna, thank you for being there through all this and for being so kind. To you all, a fond thank you and my undying gratitude and highest esteem.)
~ Scarlet Letter ~
Everything That Can Go Wrong...
~****************************************************************~
She felt so warm and heavy that for a moment she considered whether or not she was unwell. And then she remembered. The shock of the realisation jerked her into a sitting position and, half-blind, she felt arms settle around her and panicked. Her fear was roaring in her ears so loudly that it took a few seconds of struggling before she heard the soft voice in her ear.
"... Wanda... Shhh... It's okay. I promise, you're alrigh'..." Turning her head she looked into eyes as blue and unpredictable as the seas, and saw innumerable treasures hidden there. Yet more realisation hit her, and she moved herself around to embrace him, her arms throbbing but less important than feeling him within their circle, and he held her in return, the fear dissipating.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she said breathlessly, and he chuckled a little and kissed her cheek.
"Wanda luv, I already told ya. There ain' nothin' ya can do that'll ever hurt me," he said calmly, and she drew back from their hug to kiss him, needing to see if what she remembered from the night before held true still. When he broke it after what seemed an age, the fire coursing through her veins was all the proof she needed that it held.
"What's wrong, luv?" he asked quietly, stroking back her hair, and she shrugged, kissing him again.
"I just... needed to see if it still felt the same..?" she said, her tone questioning, and her eyes uncertain, and he gathered her closer to him and kissed her again, the gesture almost seeming an invasion of her soul but without being one. Invasion wasn't generally something you welcomed and enjoyed like nothing you had ever felt before.
"Doesn't it?" he asked, and she nodded.
"It does... How about you?" He smiled, stifling a laugh, and pressed a kiss to her forehead.
"Darlin', if I said I reckoned it wouldn' ever stop feelin' like this, would that rate as creepy?" She shook her head and giggled.
"No, I'd say it had better feel that way and if that scares you then you just need to deal!" His grin was all the answer she needed.
"John?"
"Yes luv?"
"Do you want to tell the others yet or..?" she was biting her lip and he kissed her again to make her stop.
"Darlin' – Wanda – if you'd let me announce it on national television and put a huge bloody statement in all the papers about it, it still wouldn't be enough. Damn it woman, the whole world oughta know what a lucky bastard I am!" he was laughing now, and it was entirely infectious for all she disapproved of such notions of publicising their relationship.
"Well, could we maybe tell the guys first? And Kitty and Rogue? I think they're really our main priorities, and Pietro might be upset if he had to find out by seeing us on TV, don't you think?" John sighed dramatically and swept her into his arms, rising from the bed and kissing her yet again.
"Wanda, whatever makes you happy, that's what'll happen. But ya better believe I'm not gonna be anythin' less than completely obvious about how much I love ya," he said seriously, and she giggled at him.
"I think they'll catch on when they see you toting me around like in some Shakespearian play," she replied, and he raised an eyebrow and lowered her to the floor so that she was standing before tilting her backwards in a dramatic swooping motion worthy of the silver screen and intoning in a deeply melodramatic voice,
"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn..."
~**********************************************************~
Remy and Rogue – despite not being morning people – had settled on leaving the mansion to go and check on Wanda – despite it being merely an excuse to get away from the X-kids on Remy's part, and it being an excuse to ask Wanda the deal with John on Rogue's part – and so they pulled up in the Brotherhood driveway at approximately ten to eleven that morning, thoroughly expecting the boys to be still abed. Remy gallantly opened the locked door for his Rogue to avoid having to wake anyone up, although the disparaging look she gave him at his unorthodox entry-gaining methods put a slight damper on his already dim morning spirits.
"Why can't ya jus' knock like a normal person y' damn thief?" she grumbled, and he closed the door behind them and slung his arm around her shoulders, ignoring her less than sunny disposition the best he could.
"Don' wanna wake dem dat shouldn' be woken, chere," he said patiently, leading her through to the kitchen and opening the door for her again, his reasoning being that more coffee was the solution to his situation. Rogue's gasp alerted him to the reality that a great deal more coffee would be needed than he had first assumed. Ducking around her, he couldn't contain an overly smug grin at the sight of Wanda hastily detaching herself from a certain Australian and step away, arms wrapping around her waist in that odd position insecure women favoured.
"Gods, Rogue, what the hell?!" Wanda mumbled, still managing to make the words cut through the room like knives, and Rogue held up her hands to appease her embarrassed friend.
"Wanda, Ah am so sorry!" she said, and the other girl just shook her head, refusing to look her in the eyes.
"Whatever..." she said, her tone harder than Remy believed she wanted it to be, and he glaced at John who nodded and put a subtle hand on Wanda's elbow, smiling at Remy and Rogue.
"Aw, come off it luv," he said good-naturedly,
"Ya can' be like that this early in the mornin' – it's not even twelve yet!" and, miraculously, Wanda turned her head to look at him and broke into a stunning smile before making her way over to Rogue and giving her a hug.
"I know, I'm sorry honey, okay? I just keep thinking – I mean, I'm sick of feeling like I can't do whatever I want in my own house without worrying about being barged in on and all of this and you know – you know?" Rogue just laughed and hugged her back, and while they were embracing John jerked his head at Remy and the two former Acolytes made themselves scarce.
Once in the hallway, they migrated from there to the living room, Remy waiting until they were both seated on opposing armchairs before he broke into a wide, hardly pre-noon grin that spoke of many years of rising to the occasion.
"So, Johnny-boy – finally got t'rough t' de petit belle friponne, hein?" he asked with a suggestively raised eyebrow, and John raised his own in a rather less positively charged gesture.
"Oh, mon ami, y' don' tink Remy – non! I didn' mean – "
"Come off it mate, wouldn' tell ya even if I had done y' daft bastard!" John snorted, and Remy shrugged and sipped his coffee, then turned a less ostentatious version of the grin on his friend again.
"But y' did talk t' de femme, non? Even though y' weren' doin' s' much talkin' when we got 'ere," he asked, and John smiled, the first truly contented smile Remy thought he had ever seen on the Aussie's face.
"Yeah... we talked about it. Ev'rythin'. Hell, she knows things now even you don'," John laughed a little, shaking his head, and Remy scooted a little on his chair, gazing intently at the Australian.
"An' it's all good now? She understands?" he asked, needing to be able to assure Rogue of the success of the thing later on when questioned.
"She does. She understands. Don' even think she holds it agains' me, which is some kind o' relief fer me, I gotta tell ya!" Remy smiled, relieved, as John stared off into the distance somewhere over Remy's head, eyes soft and warm.
"She's a good woman, Johnny-boy. Y' damn lucky. Long as y' good t' her, don' see why y' can' ride off into de sunset t'gether yet," the Cajun said sincerely, and his friend focused on him once again.
"I reckon you haven' done s' bad f' yerself either, eh mate?" Remy chuckled into his coffe, warming his ungloved hands on the mug which read 'How Do I Like It? Blacker Than The Blackest Black Times Infinity'.
"Yeah, Rogue be de only ting in de worl' could make me go an' stay wit' de X-Men mon ami... I swear, dey be de mos' annoyin' bunch o' people – de kids won' shut up an' de adults won' leave y' alone f' ten seconds – it be worse dan prison!" he complained, and John grimaced.
"Leas' they bathe regularly down your end mate – an' y' get three square meals a day f' nothin'. Ev'rythin' that gets done round 'ere only gets done because Wanda either does it or says she wants it done. I didn' know what squalor mean' before I ended up here!" Remy shook his head sadly.
"Ma Tante would cry if she saw dis place, mon ami... An' den she would kill dem," he said wryly, and John laughed.
"I tell ya mate, I'm glad as hell I don' 'ave a family sometimes. Ain' nothin' I hate more than Sheilas in aprons tellin' a bloke ta clean up." Remy's face shifted into nostalgic folds, and John raised an eyebrow.
"Please, Rem'. No anecdotes before noon. I can' take it," he pleaded, and the Cajun scowled at him.
"Fine! Have y' way den!" The Aussie just shook his head, chuckling.
"Don' take it out on me mate," he said pointedly,
"It ain' my faul' ya hate that bloody place and it ain' my faul' ya scared o' losin' Rogue ta them." Remy's eyes widened as his mouth worked, brain undecided as yet as to whether protest, insult, or just yelling was the proper response to John's accusation. The sudden change in tone of their formerly lighthearted chat wasn't easy to get around either.
"Merde! Y' tink I – merde, Johnny! 'M not – "
"Don' gimme that ya goddamn liar. Takes one ta know one mate an' it's written all over you," John said tartly, and Remy jolted back as if he'd been struck.
"I..."
"You're afraid o' losin' her ta them. You're still afraid she'll decide ya don' belong an' throw you out on your arse. Ya didn' think pas' gettin' in and now you're in ya don' 'ave a clue, do ya?" Remy closed his eyes and threw back his head, sighing deeply.
"I hate y', homme. How d' y' know dat? Y' don' know shit." John just shrugged.
"I know y' not as happy as y' pretendin' ta be. Y' keep fergettin' I 'ad ta bloody live with ya all that time you were sighin' after the Sheila! I know ya. So don' pull all that crap wi' me. I'll know." Remy slitted his eyes and glared at his friend.
"Still hate y'... But y' righ'. I don' tink I knew what I was walkin' int' when I signed up f' dis. I t'ought... I don' know. Y' tell me, since y' know ev'ry'tin," he said, more than a tad disgruntled, and John mulled it over for a moment, stalling by hiding behind his tea.
"Y' thought y' could jus' waltz in, win fair lady's 'eart an' it'd be a done deal," John said finally, and Remy snorted.
"Yeah, 'cause 'm a fool, righ'?" he asked sarcastically, and John nodded.
"That, an' y' were too caught up in how ya fel' abou' the Sheila. Ya weren' plannin' ahead. An' now y' don' know where it goes from the winnin' poin' an' let me tell ya mate, you 'ave ta have this shit planned or you'll find y'self alone in the end. Let's face it – she ain' the most resilien' Sheila in the world now is she? Ya can' put any o' this on her. It's your show, mate. There ain' no swannin' off inta no sunset jus' because she can stand ya company."
"How de hell d' y' know dis?" Remy asked, his tone bordering on the insulting, and John just grinned.
"You migh' be great at what ya do, mate – but I've been dwellin' on it longer." Remy had to admit, John had a point. For all the Cajun was good at – as John put it – winning hearts, he was nothing to the analytic way the pyromaniac worked. It was one of the qualities Magneto had always praised in him, the ability to lay out any situation or strategy with a total lack of emotion and involvement to work out the best plan of action, or the outcome of a mission, whereas Remy was much more in tune with the facts and the likelihoods given his experience. He'd often wondered if the analysing was a by-product of all the shit going on in John all the time – maybe that was the only way he could make anything stick together and work in his head.
"How long, mon ami?" John shrugged again.
"I know you, an' I know what she's like. It's jus' a matter o' pullin' up y' issues an' strengths ta see what'll happen in the end. And ya did great, but now ya gotta be consistent. An' y' can' let 'er get bored or start thinkin'. An' let's face it, lastin' relationships aren' y' strongest suit, Rem'." The Cajun nodded defeat.
"I admit t' dat," he sighed.
"If ya gonna be with this Sheila for a while, ya gotta be what I believe they call boyfriend material. Meanin' she can still back out if ya don' live up t' the picture of what she wants in a bloke. Ask Rocky, he'll tell ya. He's out with the little Sheila up ta four nights a week, takes er anywhere an' everywhere she wants ta go, spends bloody hours on the phone with her, an' never complains. An' Wanda an' your Rogue both think he's doin' a bloody fantastic job of it from what I've gathered. Apparently, it's called commitment." Remy raised both eyebrows, but then had to shake his head in assent. He knew that now that things were in place Rogue would expect him to be the stick-around kind of guy – but he'd never been that guy a day of his life. He didn't know how. John was absolutely right, when it came to commitment, the only kind the Cajun knew about at all was the commitment you made to a client in a business arrangement, and even then the code ran that any higher bidder made other offers void. So all in all he knew more about bending the concept of commitment than anything else.
"'M goin' down wit' dis ship, non?" he asked sadly, and John smiled.
"Not a chance mate. If Rocky can do it, there ain' no way you can' handle it. I mean c'mon – y' jus' have ta deal with the Sheila's family – "
"I like Rogue's brot'er," Remy interrupted, sounding optimistic, but John just nodded absently and continued, his obvious lack of enthusiasm drowning Remy's spark completely.
"Her friends – "
"De petit chat doesn' hate me, an' y' petite belle friponne don' eit'er, does she?" John frowned a moment, considering the matter.
"She accepts you because ya make 'er mate a happier Sheila. An' because I told 'er I'd string you up if ya made 'er unhappy." The look on his friend's face gave reason for the added,
"Course I 'ave nothin' but faith in you, mate, nothin' but faith. Y' can do this no problem, I jus' gotta keep me own woman 'appy, it ain' personal!" Remy's eybrows knitted in a way that spoke of distinct lack of faith in John's convictions but he said nothing, just nodded for the Aussie to continue.
"That Professor, how's he feel about ya?" he asked, and Remy shrugged.
"No idea, mon ami. He wants Remy t' help Rogue wit' her powers but Remy don' know how dat'll work yet – we have a session dis evening – je pense ma chere be nervous about dat..." John grinned.
"Trus' me, mate – speakin' as someone who's an expert on therapy, I know jus' how importan' it is ta do it with someone ya trust, an' if Xavier thinks you can 'elp y' Sheila, he's probably onta somethin'. He ain' no fool that man," he said seriously, and Remy tipped his head in the direction of the door.
"Rogue don' tink it's such a great idea," he said with a grimace, and John shrugged.
"She'll come round. Whether or not y' can 'elp, she needs someone there who won' see her diff'rently afterwards, an' knowin' you mate, you'll love 'er more f' bein' part o' helpin' 'er. Don' worry about that. Those kids givin ya grief?" Remy shook his head.
"Non. De petite femmes be annoyin', de petit hommes be aggravatin'. De real problem is dat red-eyed piece a shit an' his mission t' destroy Remy's chances wit' de ot'ers..." John narrowed his eyes and flexed his fingers.
"What I wouldn' give ta be the one ta put him out o' commission for a bit," he said, longing evident in his darkened tone and Remy nodded, more than sympathetic to his friend's desires.
"De wors' part is, Rogue use' t' be real int' de bastard," he said angrily and John raised a disbelieving eyebrow.
"Seriously? Talk about a lapse in judgemen'! 'Ow bad was it?" Remy gritted his teeth.
"Plenty bad. She spen' a lot o' time wit' 'im tryin' t' fit in f' his sake – damn but dat was heartbreakin' t' watch... Ma chere reduced t' dat by some pansy ass piece o' white boy scout trash..." John shuddered at the visuals he was getting and took a fortifying sip of tea.
"Bloody 'ell mate. I can' even imagine 'ow bad that must a' been for ya. But ya can' think he's got any sway wth 'er now, can ya? The way she talks he an' his Disney Princess are frontrunners of the Devil 'imself! She hates them about as much as Wanda does an' if there's one thing my Wanda does well, it's hate," John said, sounding sickened and incredulous at the idea that Scott might have any persuasive powers where Rogue was concerned. Remy shook his head sadly.
"I don' know, mon ami. I jus' don' know. I love ma chere an' I hate dat spec-wearin' do-gooder but I promised Rogue I'd try t' get along wit' 'er friends an' not cause trouble so even if he is plannin' sometin' I can' do notin' t' stop 'im..." John scowled.
"Tell me about it... I promised Wanda I'd be civil to that damn brother o' hers an' really all I wanna do is beat him ta death with his own legs," the Aussie lamented, and Remy smiled. The mental image was priceless.
"He don' know y' an' de petite friponne be un couple d'amoureux? What is he, blind?" Remy asked the question with a smile on his lips but John's glare wiped it off as surely as if it had been an illusion.
"May I remind you that nothin' was official until las' nigh' an' as far as we know none o' them 'ave even seen me an' Wanda yet? Hell, they're all still asleep as far as we know! When exactly would he have 'ad the time ta catch his dear sister an' the residen' freakshow at it?" John asked with crushing patronisation in his voice, and Remy snorted.
"Johnny, de boy would have t' be blind t' not know dere was sometin' between de two of y' before now! Ce fut le coup de foudre! An' wasn' he de one who caught y' dat day in de bathroom t'get'er? Y' can' tell me dere wasn' sometin' goin' on dere, it was so obvious, even if Speedy was exaggeratin'. Y' had de look in y' eyes so don' try t' deny it!" John rolled his eyes at that.
"Yeah, I already told ya, I kissed 'er, but 'er brother wasn' jus' exaggeratin' mate, he migh' as well 'ave been lyin' outright!" he protested, but Remy waved a scornful hand across the argument.
"De point is y' been dancin' aroun' dis f' so long now it wouldn' surprise me if y' announced y' goddamn engagement an' all y' got was a nod an' a 'Get outta de way, y' blockin' de TV'," the Cajun said drily, and John sighed.
"We can' tell them until Wanda feels up to it. I promised. She ain' exactly feelin' 'er best these days an' I don' wanna get 'er all riled up over this when she should be concentratin' on gettin' better again," he explained, adding,
"Bes' I can manage is ta carry on bein' so damn obvious you'd 'ave ta be deaf, blind an' plain stupid not ta see it. Leastways she hasn' vetoed that one yet," he complained, and Remy grinned.
"De tings we do f' love, non?" he asked with twinkling eyes, and John groaned.
"I tell ya though, if that whiny streak o' piss she calls 'er twin says one word I ain' responsible f' what I'll do to 'im," he warned, and Remy chuckled.
"Sounds fair, mon ami..."
~****************************************************************~
"So... y'all worked things out, huh?" Rogue asked awkwardly, and Wanda shrugged.
"Yeah... yeah, we did..." Rogue looked at her friend's face, the slightly flushed cheeks, the tired eyes, and her tone softened and morphed into concern. She'd been through hell in the space of a week and it was showing.
"Are ya sure ya wanna be doin' this after all you've been through lately sugah? Ah mean, it ain' lahke he'll be goin' anywhere if you just wanna wait an' see," she asked tentatively, and Wanda smiled sadly.
"You're wrong. He was planning on leaving. He actually planned on getting out before any of this but he got involved and then it was too late," she said, sounding tired, and Rogue's eyes widened.
"Sugah, if he was gonna leave ya then you don' owe him a thing! Tell me ya ain' jus' doin' this ta keep him around!" Wanda's head snapped up and her eyes filled with disgust at the suggestion, her voice mirroring the emotion they displayed.
"No! Of course I'm not! I wouldn't do that – what do you take me for? Do I look that sad and desperate to you?!" Anger was peeking through and Rogue shook her head, attempting to calm her friend before she was prompted to use her powers again when she should be resting.
"No, no, sugah that ain' what Ah'm sayin' at all! Ah jus' worry about you, okay? Ah know that if Remy up an' tol' meh he were plannin' on leavin' meh Ah'd do just about anythang ta keep him here, Ah jus' wanna make sure you're comfortable goin' into this the way you two have!" Wanda's disbelieving snort almost hurt.
"If I didn't want to be doing this then I wouldn't be doing it Rogue! We talked about everything, he told me everything. I know why he did what he did – and I don't care! None of that stuff matters to me, not the issues, not what he went through with my father, none of it matters to me. John was honest with me and he told me he'd been planning to leave so that I wouldn't have to face him after what we'd been through together. He didn't want me to have to deal with another person who'd betrayed my trust like that. Then when I broke down it was too late and do you know something? When I woke up in that awful godforsaken place you people call a medical bay the first thing I saw was him and I thought he was dead! And do you know what I felt? I wasn't angry, I didn't hate him, I wasn't happy he was gone. I felt like I had wasted the chance to be happy, let it slip through my fingers and lost it forever because I thought I'd lost him..." Rogue was completely speechless and so she did not comment and Wanda continued talking, the hurt in her eyes turning to pain unimaginable and then to something Rogue had never seen in Wanda before.
"I realised that I felt something for him that I didn't know how to explain and it was so scary... I always thought that the fairytales had it right and it scared me when I realised it was all a bunch of crap and that in the real world love is just a confused mess," Wanda said with the hint of a smile in her voice.
"I was afraid to tell him what I thought I was feeling because I wasn't sure and I didn't want to find out that it was a lie or a dream... I wanted... I don't know what I wanted," she didn't seem to notice the tears that were making their way down her cheeks but Rogue reached out and wiped them away gently, knowing that what Wanda was trying to describe was the feeling of needing another person, the way Rogue was beginning to suspect she needed Remy. That feeling that as long as they were close to you, everything would be alright...
"You wanted him to know, sugah... Maybe tell you what you were really feelin'?" she asked, and Wanda nodded, smiling through the tears that weren't done falling yet.
"I guess... Rogue... He makes me feel alive..." she whispered, and the other Goth couldn't contain her own tears anymore and wrapped Wanda in a tight hug, stroking her hair as they cried together.
"Ah know, honeypie, Ah know... Ah'm so sorry for everythang that's happened, Ah'm so sorry Ah haven't been around for you more... You're in love with him, aren't you?" the Southerner asked, and Wanda raised her head from the other girl's shoulder and bit her lip before saying,
"I think I am... I really think I am..."
"Oh, honeypie... Ah knew it... An' what does he say to all this? He knows, raght? Ah mean, you told him?" Wanda nodded, taking a deep breath and saying,
"He loves me too..." There was a moment of complete silence as Rogue processed this information and then the Southern Gothic gave the only appropriate response one could give in any situation where a girl's best friend tells her that the man of her dreams is equally in love with her and it is officially on. She screamed.
~*****************************************************************~
In the other room, John and Remy leapt up as a joint unit and raced each other to the kitchen to see what the cause of all the screaming was and found an ecstatic pair of jumping, hugging Goths in the middle of the floor crying and squealing their elation to high heaven.
"Merde, Rogue, y' gave me a heart attack dere, I t'ought sometin' was wrong!" the Cajun said angrily, more from the fact that they were indeed safe and sound and that he had been frightened beyond what he had assumed he would be at hearing his chere screech like that.
"Bloody hell darlin' don' ever do that again! I damn near died when you lot started with the yellin'," John snapped, and the two girls just stopped jumping and laughed at the consternation of their respective men.
"We're fine, were just happy," Wanda said with a smile that knocked John's perception of beauty to next Thursday and set entirely new standards for others to measure up to. Impossibly high ones. Rogue just giggled and somehow flowed towards Remy and twined herself around him, managing to simultaneously turn him into a puddle of lovesick goo and rocket him to heaven.
"Calm down sugah, we're jus' celebratin' the good news," she purred, and out of the corner of her eye saw John look questioningly at Wanda who nodded, beaming, before being treated to the Aussie's undivided and clearly thrilled attentions as they kissed. Remy chuckled and kissed her cheek.
"Whatever ma chere says..." he smiled, leaning in for a kiss of their own. She closed her eyes but it never came and when she opened them to ask what the hell was taking so long she saw why. Lance was standing in the doorway with a joyous Kitty wrapped around him wearing a lacy pink thing that no doubt was part of the reason for Lance's rather self-satisfied grin. It was now officially a couples kitchen. Wanda looked torn for a moment and didn't seem to be able to decide between moving closer to John for support or pulling away from him to mask their actions but it was hardly worth it because the dawning look on Kitty's face said it all.
"Like, Oh. My. God," the diminutive Valley Girl breathed before literally launching herself into the room and catching Rogue about the throat with a one-armed hug that tore her away from Remy and towards Wanda who was enveloped in Kitty's unrelenting other arm and they were treated to a forced group hug which they embellished with more jumping and squealing. Lance settled for a manly nod in John's direction, who graciously accepted the gesture with a nod in return and Remy, exempt from the manliness for the time being, simply grinned like a fool at the girls' unbridled display of, well, girliness.
"Like, Lance, what are you guys like, still doing here?" a flushed and excited Kitty asked her boyfriend, who looked vaguely puzzled by the question until Remy took over by approaching Rogue and giving her the kiss they'd missed out on a few minutes before.
"Have fun, ma belle chere," he said huskily, his tone more than implying that he's be counting the seconds until their reunion, and she blushed and fluttered her eyelashes in her embarrassment. Lance smiled proudy at Kitty and leaned in to hug his girl who giggled faintly and pecked him on the cheek before ushering him out with shooing motions of her little hands that were really quite funny. Wanda shook her head imperceptibly at John who nodded and bowed out as gracefully as he could manage, and the boys left. Kitty turned to Wanda with a wrinkled nose and suspicion in her eyes.
"As Remy would say, why did you have to like, wound him, baby?" she asked, partly mocking the Cajun, part deadly serious, and the fear in Wanda's eyes told her all she needed to know.
"I – how? What are you talking about Kit?" Wanda asked shakily, and Rogue put her arm over her shoulder and faced Kitty, warnings in her heavily lined eyes.
"Kitty, we just got done with the crying," she said quietly, and Kitty put her hands on her hips and squared up for a fight.
"Crying is fixable, this might not be. Wanda, what was that just now with Pyro?" she asked sternly, and Wanda bit her lip and widened her eyes in an attempt at innocence.
"I don't – "
"First we walk in and you two are like, so cute together, then you pretty much, like, confirm that you two are an item now with all the happiness, and just now you were totally cold with him! What's going on here?" Kitty asked, her expression one that spoke of deep frustration, and Wanda shrugged helplessly.
"I didn't know who was coming in, we only just told Rogue and Remy and I don't want to have to deal with the guys knowing for a while yet and I'm not comfortable with all the public stuff and – and I just – I'm a little freaked out right now, okay? We haven't even been officially together for twenty-four hours and already four people know and it's like it's today's headline or something! It's all a litle bit overwhelming right now!" Wanda may have started out as sounding rightly overwhelmed and breathless but now she was just openly angry and upset about the whole subject, and Rogue rubbing her back soothingly wasn't helping the kitchen appliances that were taking turns glowing blue. Kitty took action.
"Oh, honey... I am so sorry... Of course, I get it, it's okay, you don't have to stress this, I totally get it, I just didn't think... Calm down, okay? Let's just talk about this..." Kitty's tone and the hug she gave the trembling witch seemed to indeed have the desired calming effect and they led Wanda to a chair and made her sit down, Rogue leaning on the counter next to her, Kitty seating herself next to her on the other side.
"I was just so happy for you and then you seemed, like, totally happy too, and Rogue, and I just thought... Well..." Wanda nodded slowly, and Kitty's somewhat messy apology trailed off.
"So are you and Pyro really..? Or were we happy about something else?" Kitty asked, both of the Goths well aware that this was not a fun, rhetorical question meant to break the ice. This was Kitty being serious. Kitty didn't joke about prospective milestones on the gossip highway.
"Yes..." Wanda's voice was scratchy and still smacked of tears.
"Yes what? Because I totally need to know now or else I am going to look totally dumb in a few minutes," Kitty said with a careful smile that Wanda acknowledged but didn't reciprocate in kind.
"We're together," she clarified, and Kitty's smile grew until it nigh eclipsed the rest of her face as she lunged at Wanda, trilling ecstatically.
"I like, totally knew it! You guys are, like, such an awesome couple and I like, totally hoped you'd work things out in the end!!" she sang, and Wanda ecstricated herself gently from the smaller girl and smiled a little. Kitty's enthusiasm was lightening her previously dim view of she and John's potential future together.
"So when did all this happen? Last night, right? When you ended up in his room and you didn't come out? I totally told Lance it was okay, he wanted to go in and, like, check up on you guys but I told him to leave you alone," Kitty said in her imperial-highness voice, and Wanda smiled a little more.
"Thank you. We needed to talk about things and I don't think being interrupted would have helped much," she said honestly, and Kitty looked at her slyly.
"So, is he a good kisser?" she asked, ignoring Rogue's scandalised look and Wanda's slight flinch.
"I... I... We're not really... We haven't really done anything, Kitty. It's been a tough week," she slithered around the question and the phaser nodded with an expression that suggested she possessed infinite wisdom.
"I so understand that girl. I am right there with you. And he's okay with not telling Pietro yet?" Rogue decided it was time to step in.
"Pyro's okay with anything Wanda says," she said firmly, and Kitty shared a look with her that was more an agreement to ease up on the topic.
"I hope he is,"Wanda mumbled.
"I'm really nervous about all of this," she confessed, and Kitty smiled warmly.
"Baby I'm gonna tell you what I told Rogue; that boy is so in love with you that if you ever get a phone call from his '1001 Ways In Which I Love Wanda Maximoff' seminar wondering where their guru is getting to, don't be surprised," she said with a lighthearted wink, and Wanda shrugged.
"I believe him, I'm just... All this relationship stuff... I don't really know how it works," she said, and Rogue laughed out loud.
"Honeypie, mah boy stalked meh for almost a year an' then went on some insane crusade to prove to himself that he was worthy of meh – then he came back ta meh an' didn't have the balls ta go for it! An' let's not forget the fact that Ah am countin' the days til he gets tahred o' waitin' aroun' for some gal he can' even touch for more than two consecutive minutes," she scoffed, and Wanda nodded.
"Good point. How many countries is Remy wanted in anyway?" she asked, and Rogue shrugged.
"Ah don' wanna know," she sad honestly, and the Scarlet Witch smiled.
"I'll have to ask John who holds the record," she mused, and Kitty narrowed her eyes.
"Hold on there baby; Pyro's a wanted man?" Wanda looked at her with something akin to total and complete shock on her face but quickly tempered it to mildness again, although it was more than likely just too tiring to keep it up.
"Sure. You didn't know that?" Rogue asked, and Kitty shook her head.
"I had no idea. I mean, it's totally not a big deal that he is – Remy probably is too – but I just – I guess you, like, forget it when you spend time with them, you know? I mean, they're both really great guys!" Kitty said, smiling.
"Remy's a great cook and he's always so sweet, and Pyro is like something out of one of those movies – or one of those novels you guys read! All freaky and gentlemanly and whatnot," she giggled, and Wanda raised an eyebrow.
"Whatnot? Honey you need to spend some time away from Lance and the guys, you're starting to sound like them," she said, sounding a little worried, and Kitty tossed her ponytail.
"Well you've been using Pyro-words ever since he moved in here," she retorted, and Rogue nodded, grinning. Wanda's protests were never spoken however, because they were interrupted by a sleep-tousled, zombie version of Pietro who trudged – not generally something the illustrious Quicksilver would be seen doing but nevertheless, he trudged – into the kitchen. Closely followed by a curly silvery hodgepodge that seemed to be attached to his head.
"Morning Wanda," he mumbled, leaning in over Kitty to plant a kiss on Wanda's head and shuffling over to the coffee pot where he dumped an odd, almost syrupy half and half sugar-coffee mixture into a mug and drank deeply from it.
"Pietro, please don't leave that somewhere around the house again, if Todd gets into it we'll have to unstick his tongue from the carpet again," Wanda said absently, and her brother nodded his assent and exited the kitchen as slowly and listlessly as he had entered it.
"I give you, Pietro in the morning," she said sarcastically, breaking the spell over Rogue and Kitty who were still staring at the door in shock.
"That's Pietro in the morning?" Kitty asked, and Wanda nodded.
"He's usually up before anyone else and then he drinks that awful sugary mess and goes to fix his hair and then when he's done with the hair he's normal again," she explained, and Rogue grimaced.
"Ah don' know what's worse – the hair or that birdsnest on his head just now!" she said with distaste, and the girls dissolved into laughter.
~**************************************************************~
"You guys are not saying what I think you're saying?" Remys hateful scowl and John's rather more genial grimace rammed it home to him and Lance looked at them in shock before laughing raucously and wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.
"You're actually asking me about something like this? What happened to being the Cajun Casanova or whatever the hell you call yourself? And you, what happened to all that romance novel bull you were spewing the other day?" he asked increduously, the last part adressed to the firestarter, and John shrugged.
"Life ain' a bloody novel mate. It's why they sell so great," he explained patiently, and Remy gritted his teeth.
"An' it's de Ragin' Cajun, if y' don' mind, Rocky," he growled. John rolled his eyes.
"Don' make it worse than it is, mate. It's already embarrassin' enough havin' t' ask a bloody novice about somethin' like this," he said sharply, and Remy glared at him.
"Not in front of l'enfant," he grated, and John crossed his arms over his chest and huffed.
"So let me get this straight; you two are asking me where to take the girls out?" Lance asked, barely containing the desire to snicker violently at the two older, more experienced guys who were apparently totally inequipped to do any actual dating beyond the pick-up stage.
"Your superior knowledge of the area an' the fact that the little Sheila is on your side makes you the best candidate for this particular job. Now give us answers or prepare to die horribly," John said in as pleasant a tone as he could manage, and Lance's gaze slid to Remy who nodded, looking overly reasonable.
"He's bein' serious, mon ami," he confirmed, and John smiled, a hint of his alter-ego Insane Man showing. Personally Lance had thought Insane Man was a bit too unoriginal but it was all they'd had time to come up with – once they knew him a little better they could tailor the nickname to the issues.
"Yesh, I could apologise for it but I'm runnin' on three hours of sleep and my undying love for Wanda so forgive me if I'm a little testy, will you?" the Aussie asked with a distinctly sinister note to his voice. Lance decided not to tempt fate. Love in itself was a treacherous fuel in a man – love and sleep-deprivation was if possible even worse.
"Well seeing as I've been with Kitten a while now I've pretty much got the dating thing down – she insisted," he added, to excuse the potential sappiness of his extensive knowledge of dating, and the former Acolytes nodded their understanding. Kitty did seem the type who'd enjoy conventional dating.
"So all you guys have to do is outline what kind of thing you're looking for and I'll fill you in on where to go," Lance said, trying to sound as helpful as possible and ignore the light in Pyro's eyes as he fiddled with his Zippo.
"And if I'm not sure I can ask Kitten for you, you know, make it sound like I want to refresh good old times with her and get details... She's really good at that stuff!" Remy nodded, a pensive look on his face, and John snapped shut the lighter and stood up.
"Righty ho then Rocky – I'm gonna go drown my homicidal tendencies in hot water an' you an' Pokerface there draw up a battleplan," he said decisively, leaving Lance alone with Remy and more than a little confused.
"Is he..?"
"Gonna take a shower, mon ami, and no, he ain' really homicidal – he's been takin' de pills," Remy told the younger mutant, who breathed a not-so-covert sigh of pure relief.
"Ease up dere, boy, what's de problem?" Remy asked, a little too pleased to see Avalanche sweat after he'd been forced to ask the younger man for help with his rather pressing problem.
"I don't know man, he just freaks me out sometimes. That whole weird thing... Like Fred says, you don't know what he's going to do," Lance tried to explain, but Remy just shrugged, grinning.
"He's a good guy, mon ami. Relax. We all get a little high strung when we don' sleep enough, hein?" Lance smiled, reassured.
"I guess. Now, what are you guys going for?" Remy smiled, a slow, warm smile that spread quickly and mercilessly and swept Lance up in it's glowing, destructive path.
"Can y' do epic, boy?"
My Shameless Pimping List:
My dearest Anon Goddess and I decided long ago that pimping out good fiction is something we should all be doing, so without further ado get thine arse to her splendiferous profile, pick out anything that grabs your fancy and read, damn your eyes, read! Especially Daughter Of Destruction, her ongoing Jonda fiction which is a work of absolute art. I shall hear no argument to gainsay this statement.
Then, thou should get thine jollies at AshmandaLC's Olde Fictione Emporiumme, where her Unstoppable fiction muct be read or else. For it is fantastic, and she is a stand up dame, whom I am greatly fond of.
No, this is not my equivalent of a personal ad, although if it were, I wholly agree, I am indeed lucky to know such lovely people and at the risk of sounding morally stunted, yes it does seem that I am casting a wide net when in fact I am merely very fond of them both and they are both unquestionably fine writers.
Yours, the finally returned Valkyrien.