-1Give Guidance or Counsel

Cats

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist

This is it! This is it! This is it! *is having a fit* Oh my Diana! This is the chapter! After all this hype you're gunna be like 'This is it? It's crap!' but I'm so excited! Eek! Arrogant as it is, I love this chapter so much that my heart is thumping in my ears. XD Please review.

Chapter 16 - In an Adult Way

Saturday the 20th of February… Still.

They walked down path after path in silence. Ed had looked for Roy to confront him, but now they were together again, Ed had no clue as to where to begin. Roy was shivering, being in only his normal attire of a shirt and slacks, but despite Ed suggesting he should go get something warmer to wear, Roy had opted to just start walking. Ed himself was relatively toasty in his black jeans and the white shirt and beige v-neck jumper he'd borrowed from Al. He'd wanted to dress up and look smart and adult when he told Roy he was no longer a child, so it okay to trust him. Still, they walked on in silence though, as Ed didn't have the courage to start a conversation, and Roy seemed somewhat as if he wished Ed wasn't there at all. Ed took a deep breath and took in as much cold winter air as he could.

"What's on your mind?" he eventually asked, having heard it so many times from Roy himself during group meetings. He heard the elder man give a slightly bitter laugh, but didn't look at him. Perhaps Roy was like himself and didn't like to be looked at when he was 'sharing' something personal.

"You really want to know?" the elder asked, and Ed nodded his head - 'hmming'. Roy sighed. "Sorry to be blunt, but you never really get it any other way, this… it doesn't concern you."

Ed heard the words, but didn't register them until he felt the tears prick at the edge of his eyes. He gulped them back. He wouldn't cry. He wouldn't even get angry - because he was an adult. He had to show Roy that what was upsetting him did concern him, but he had to do it in an adult way.

"Maybe it doesn't." he agreed, and saw out of the corner of his eyes that Roy was taken aback. Roy had expected a tantrum. "Will you keep walking with me anyway? We can talk about something else." his tone was clipped in a way that suggested he was trying very hard, and Roy noticed this. He wasn't going to say anything because an Ed that agreed with him was much easier to handle.

"How's school?" he asked, shoving his hands in his pockets and beginning the usual fiddling with his lighter. He'd been using that lighter a lot more recently. Ed scuffed his shoes.

"You'd know if you'd been there." he snapped, then blushed. "I mean, it's been good I guess… although, I wish you'd been there."

Roy smiled lightly.

"I'll be back soon, stuff has been going on recently."

Ed nodded, though it seemed like it took a lot of effort.

"With your family."

"Yeah, it's all a little complicated." Roy agreed. "So, what about Winry and Al? Feel's like it's been ages since I've seen them."

Ed bit back the same retort as last time. If Roy hadn't been running away then he'd know how Al and Winry were. Instead, he said:

"They've been well."

Roy nodded, and they fell back into an awkward silence. They slowed their pace and came to a stop. It was then they realised they had come to a stop right in front of the gates to the school. It was closed and locked because it was Saturday, but Ed happened to look round and see Roy giving them a mischievous grin.

"Wanna go in?" the man asked, and Ed, in a effort to keep mature, rose an eyebrow in the exact way Roy was prone to doing. Roy grinned some more. "C'mon, I bet you've always wanted to know what School's like on a weekend."

Ed shrugged.

"Not really, it'll just be deserted, and I've already seen the school deserted minus you and I." he explained. Roy frowned. There went that plan to get Ed to lose his fake maturity. While Ed was certainly more agreeable this way, it wasn't his Ed. His Ed was an immature brat who cried a lot and hated being called short, not this… this adult! Roy took a few steps back, ran forward and scaled the gate. He landed on the other side with all the grace of a cat.

"You can crawl under again." he grinned, hoping to spark a reaction. The blonde glanced up at the top of the gate, took five long steps back, and copied what Roy had done. He landed next to the dark haired man with little more grace then a grounded whale. He promptly fell on his behind with a hiss of pain, and heard Roy laugh from somewhere above him. A hand shot into his vision and he took his groggily. "It takes practise." Roy sympathised.

"How many times have you had to climb it?" Ed asked, trying to keep the pain out of his voice. He was sure he could have done that if he hadn't been so tired from not eating. Roy laughed lightly.

"Not this particular one very many times, but when I was a kid I was always running away over walls and gates."

Ed smiled, imagining the image.

"Running from what?" he asked. Roy chuckled, musing his hair and averting his eyes.

"My teacher."

Ed shivered, thinking of his own ex-teacher. Izumi could be scary when angry. He nodded sympathetically as they made their way deeper into the school and towards the psychology block. They dawdled up the stairs in silence and Roy produced his keys from his pocket, unlocking the door to his office. Had he planned that they'd end up here? They stepped inside and Roy instantly went to lean against his desk. Ed opted for staying close to the door, his hand securely on the door handle. Being there again was comforting; having Roy in his office again. But he still hadn't made Roy realise that it was okay to trust him.

"Roy… I… Whatever's happening right now, I… I'm here."

Roy sighed.

"It's just family stuff." he repeated.

"Bollocks it's family stuff!" Ed shouted. "I know for a fact you're no longer in contact with your family!"

"I thought you were being an adult." Roy murmured. "What have you been doing? Checking up on me?"

Ed seethed, and Roy took his cigarettes from his back pocked, plucked one out and lit it with his lighter.

"I've been worried!" Ed all but screamed. "You take off for days and the next time I see you you're in a whole new neighbourhood, slowly killing yourself with these!" he grabbed the cigarette right out of the older mans mouth and crushed it in his Automail hand.

"So what?" The elder grumbled. Ed had to stop himself from hitting the man - with his Automail fist.

"What are you doing?" he asked, voice shaking. "I never thought you were this stupid."

"It's my choice what I do." Roy stated. "What the hell you do you care anyway?"

Ed shook his head.

"Stop trying to keep me in the dark! All this shit about family events like I'm some little kid who's upset because you can't make it to my birthday party. It's all a bunch of bull! I'm tired of being treated like a child!" The blonde eventually snapped, grabbing the material of Roy's shirt and balling it up in his fist. The threatening nature of the action was lost by Ed's weak grip, and the croak in his voice which betrayed he was holding back tears. "You of all people should know that I can handle it. Haven't I been through enough? Yet you're jumping about the bush and never getting to the god-damn point!"

Roy prised Ed's fingers off his shirt and sighed.

"What do you-"

"Don't you dare! … Don't you ever even dare think that I don't care, or worry. I worry about you all the time because you're not reassuring me. You're… You're scaring me Roy… Why won't you tell me the truth?" The boy found his was back to clenching the material of Roy's shirt, but this time it was a lighter, more desperate gesture, and Roy made no move to stop him. He carried on in a small voice. "I'm the one in counselling, but something I feel like you're the one that needs it. You never talk. Not to me, or Hughes, or anyone… don't you trust us? I wish you'd stop thinking of me as a little kid - 'Cause I get it, I've been there! So raked with guilt you're hanging on the edge; all it takes is one puff of wind to knock you either way…. If I can do all I did, come out with a fake arm and leg, and a lifelong debt to my brother, and I'm still willing to give this a chance, why wont you? I thought you were the adult. I'm so fed up of you telling me it doesn't matter, or I don't care, because you can't tell what I'm feeling, and I do care. I can't stand to see you doing to this to yourself." He grabbed the packet of cigarettes that were sitting innocently on the table and threw them across the room.

"I know I'm a brat sometimes." He carried on, "and it's hard to keep up with you since you move so fast. And yeah, I've made some stupid mistakes, and chanced are tomorrow Russell will go to the police and I'll never be able to see you again. But that… that sucks! I don't want to think about it! I want to think about you, and only you. And I want you to think about me, and only me… maybe that's selfish but I… I love you. I wish you'd tell me things; anything, everything! I wanna be there for you because I'm so god-damn in love with you! But you keep running away from me… Roy please… just trust me."

There was pause in which it felt like time had stopped in the room. A deafening silence swept over them, broken only by the sounds of Ed's breathing. Only Ed's breathing, the blonde realised, Roy wasn't breathing. Roy couldn't breathe, he was too awed by the beauty in front of him, eventually, he took a large breath, almost as if trying breath Ed in.

"Marry me."