Emma didn't know what to do the first time she saw Regina cry. She didn't even know someone as icy as the mayor was capable of such emotion. Her hands moved to Regina's back, rubbing it, trying to comfort her, but not really knowing how. Emma wasn't sure why her girlfriend was so upset, every time she tried to explain it, she couldn't get her words together past her hiccuping.
"You know you can tell me," the blonde whispered, her breath soothing on Regina's ear. She moved her fingers to the mayor's beautiful brown hair, running her fingers through it and playing with just a few strands. Emma wasn't one for soothing people, she was always the one that was making sure their lives were miserable, but since her and Regina started seeing each other, she couldn't not care.
"I- I just.. I f-feel so..," the other murmured, reaching up and wiping her nose with the back of her hand, "I feel so awful for what I did to everyone." She sat up a little straighter, making sure Emma's hand stayed on her back. Regina always felt better being alone, but right now, she just needed to be held.
Emma blinked a few times. Regina feeling bad? That was something new. She never thought the brunette was one to apologize for anything, no matter how bad it all came out. Regina was the evil queen, for God's sake. Her whole existence was just to ruin people's lives, but it seemed to Emma that she never really saw it that way. Maybe it was just a title that was given to her by the people she screwed over. Emma didn't really understand what had happened in the past, mostly because Regina never wanted to talk about it. She always shook her head and walked away when the blonde even opened her mouth.
"But everything is all better now," she slid her hand around her girlfriend's waist, pulling her as close as she could, "Everyone remembers who they are; fences are mended."
"Everyone hates me for what I did. Don't you see that, Emma? They hate me. They want to kill me. What am I supposed to do? I can't even leave," Regina whimpered. She hated being so vulnerable, so exposed to criticism for her tears. Tears were weak, showing everyone your inner self was week, or so her mother would say. She could never cry around her unless she wanted to be humiliated.
Emma didn't know what to say. She knew how irate everyone was; they even came to her house in an angry mob, threatening her until the sheriff got there to save the day. The townspeople were still angry, still sending anonymous letters to the house, though sometimes Emma could tell who they were from from the person's handwriting. Regina did do wrong. She did take people from their lives in the fairytale world & moved them somewhere where they couldn't even remember their own family members, but why would she cry over this if she wasn't sorry?
"Maybe you should tell them that you are sorry?"
"I can't," the brunette wiped her eyes.
"Why not?" Her girlfriend asked, placing a hand on Regina's chin and moving her head so that they were seeing eye-to-eye. "Why can't you just apologize and be done with it?"
"Because that means I'm weak.." And with that, the tears stopped as fast as they started; she pulled herself together, running her own fingers through her hair, pulling away from Emma. She was certain that that breakdown wasn't going to happen again. Regina could only hear her own mother's voice in her head. She only heard the things that were drilled in her mind throughout her childhood. She couldn't let anyone see that she could be dominated in a split second, she couldn't be submissive. "& I'm not weak."