Casanova Klink: Part II

Gertrude had spent most of the morning attempting to organize the office. Unfamiliar with the last secretary's filing method, she had to create one for herself. After completing the filing, she set up a tickler system for when various forms and reports were due. As she hunkered down to work, she took special care to note "interesting" items that were crossing her desk. Prior to accepting this job, she had no idea how much information unrelated to running the camp filtered through a Stalag.

Occasionally she would look up from her work and catch Klink looking at her from his slightly opened door. When he noticed she had noticed him, he would quickly shut the door without comment. It was starting to get on her nerves. If he has something to say, he should just say it instead of hiding in his office and peeping at me as if I was a featured exhibit in a sideshow and he was a twelve-year-old boy.

Around mid-morning, Schultz came to the Kommandantur to give Klink the morning briefing. This consisted mostly of a list of prisoners and guards who had were on report for various infractions of the rules, a list of those on sick call, requests for supplies and various other items that helped the Klink manage the camp's day-to-day activities. On his way out Schultz stopped at her desk and smiled. He had such an open smile; Gertrude could not help but instantly like the rotund guard. He reminded her of the Steiff bear Lotte carried everywhere with her as a child. Of course, Schultz did not have the trademark hump but he was just as cuddlesome.

"Excuse me Frau Linkmeyer," Schultz began, "Kommandant Klink has said that you have done enough work and it is alright if you took the rest of the day off."

"If he is unhappy with my work and wants me to go home, he should have the decency to tell me himself."

"Oh no Gnädige Frau, you are doing an excellent job," Schultz replied in a hurried manner.

"Then why does he want me to leave?"

"Er…why? Why? The Kommandant has asked me to get Colonel Hogan," Schultz said changing the subject as he backed away from her penetrating stare. Schultz hurried out the door, tripping over the doorsill. Luckily, he was able to catch himself by grabbing the doorframe before he fell, face first, onto the porch. He gave her an abashed look before quickly closing the door behind him. She looked nonplussed at where Schultz had just been. Hogan spends more time with the Kommandant that he does with his own men. Why is he so dependent on the enemy? Certainly, he must have confidences within his staff or men of similar rank.

Gertrude did not have to wait long before Hogan came strutting into the Kommandantur as if he owned it. He gave her a brief smirk before letting himself into the Kommandant's office, unannounced. She had the urge to get up and listen at the door but decided against it. She would be mortified if caught and how would she even begin to explain it. No, she needed other ways to determine what was going on around her. Perhaps she would ask Odie his advice on the matter next time she saw him.

The ringing of the phone startled her out of her ruminations. Realizing it was Klink's private line, she hurried to answer it. She listened as he invited her out to dinner. This day just gets stranger and stranger, she thought to herself. It was on her lips to decline his invitation but she thought better of it. No use giving him more reason to act like an ass. Reluctantly she accepted. He told her he would pick her up in his staff car at 1700 hours giving her enough time to change her clothes and freshen up after work.

Gertrude was pleasantly surprised to find Klink was as punctual as she would expect from a man of his rank and responsibilities. She had thought they were going to the Hofbräu, which is where all the soldiers liked to frequent. Instead, he had chosen Die Blaue Taube, which boasted a spectacular view of the Fränkische Saale River. She was impressed with his choice and told him so. His face broke into a wide smile and he preened with effervescent joy. In that moment, she caught a glimpse of the real Klink. What she saw was not the man who was her brother's toady or Hogan's cat's-paw, but the real man behind the monocle, and she liked what she saw.

He escorted her into the gracious interior of the restaurant. She smiled as he pulled the chair out for her so she could sit down. For a moment, it was if she had been pulled back in time and it was Otto, not Klink, sitting across the table. She forced such fanciful thoughts from her mind. Klink was not Otto and she needed to take care not to confuse the two. Besides the inherit danger in doing so, it was not fair to Klink. Her assessment of him needed to be on his own merits. Not compared to someone, who in Gertrude's mind, he could never match.

Klink ordered a nice bottle of Riesling for them and a Butterbrot with Handkäse and Ham for himself, while she ordered a hearty bowl of Lumpen und Fleeh. The Kommandant presented his rationed book and waited while the waiter clipped the required coupons. She became nervous at the amount clipped from the book and appreciated how much this meal was costing him.

After they finished eating, they chatted amicably together as they finished of the rest of the wine. She was impressed that when he was by himself and not attempting to impress anyone by blowing his own horn, he was almost charming.

They continued to chat on their way back to the camp and Klink even walked her to her door and said good night. Overall, it was a delightful experience. So when he called her the next day, again after Hogan disappeared into his office, and asked her out for another meal, she became alarmed and suspicious. She felt it was time to nip it in the bud before her brother began looking for a minister.

Gertrude made sure this dinner would put moral fear in Klink's heart. She began to call him Wilhelm and assumed a familiarity that did not exist between the two of them. She cooed and purred at him, taking care to stroke his hand while they were traveling in the car. At dinner, she sat closer to him than was proper and began discussing the weddings that she had been to. He looked like a rabbit at a bobcat family reunion. She felt sorry for the poor guy and hated to do it to him but this was every man, or woman, for himself. By the end of the night, the he was a quivering bowl of jelly. For a moment, she thought he was going to collapse in her arms and start bawling.

When she returned to her quarters, it was as she had feared. Albert telephoned to say he had heard about her nightly activities and thought it would be nice to invite Klink home for a home cooked meal. At first, she refused but later she rethought her position. It might be just the thing to send him crying to Hogan; if anyone could extract them from this mess it would be the one who got them in it in the first place.

That morning everything fell into place, exactly as she wanted. She wore the ugliest dress she had in her closet. She would have burned it long ago but it was a present from Berta and Albert might be offended if she did not wear it occasionally. She flattered and sweet-talked him until the poor man could not stand it any longer and called for Hogan. She gave them a few minutes alone to come up with a plan and then made an excuse to come into his office. Fifteen minutes later she had her bags packed and was being driven home in the Kommandant's staff car.

Looking up at the blue fall sky, Gertrude could not help but think today was a good day and immediately began to plan her next visit to the Stalag. There were just too many interesting things going on there for her not to return. She smiled and the thought, leaned back in the seat and began to enjoy the ride home.

Next: The Unfair Exchange

A/n:

Die Blaue Taube: The Blue Dove is my creation. To my knowledge, there is no such restaurant in Hammelburg or anywhere else.

Riesling is a type of white wine produced in the Rhine region of Germany from grapes of the same name.

Butterbrot with Handkäse and Ham is an open-faced sandwich eaten with a knife and fork.

Lumpen und Fleeh (Rags and Fleas) is a type of one pot stew similar to Irish stew.

Rationing: Ration stamps, issued to all civilians, were color-coded and included rations for: sugar (white stamps), meat (blue stamps), fruits and nuts (purple stamps), dairy (yellow stamps), eggs (green stamps), cooking oil, grains, bread, jelly/jam, Kaffee-ersatz (imitation coffee made from roasted barley, oats, and chicory mixed with chemicals from coal oil tar). Citrus fruits were unavailable during the war. During the time this story takes place, rations were, 8000 grams of bread (about a half loaf a day), 120 grams of meat (less than a 10th of lb. of meat per day), 600 grams of general foods, 130 grams of sugar. Food coupons were used to buy groceries but they were also used at restaurants. If you went to a restaurant, you had to take your stamps with you. In addition to taking your money, the waiter would have removed all of the stamps needed to produce the meal. Having the required stamps did not equate to you getting the item you wanted. The store, baker, butcher had to have the item first before he could sell it. Counterfeiting ration books weas a problem during the war and punishable by placement in a labor camp. Towards the end of the war, to counterfeit or use counterfeit coupons was punishable by death. I am not sure if Klink, being in the military, would have ration coupons but since the series has shown him in restaurants and purchasing food for one of LeBeau's meals, I am winking at history.

For German's at that time, the big meal of the day was lunch with the evening meal being smaller, almost like a light American lunch.