Regard the previous drabble for disclaimers and warnings.
Atomic Number One: H is for Hidan
Kakuzu sighed and started over, "Hydrogen has the atomic number of one. Not carbon. Do you understand?"
Hidan nodded, "Yeah, yeah. Hydrogen's the first one. Got it." He leaned over the table to stare at the sheet of paper. Kakuzu's tanned fingers traced over the rows and columns, explaining the significance.
"It only has one proton therefore it it the first on the periodic table. If you get this one wrong, I need you to get tested."
The silver menace scowled, "I won't, I fuckin' swear-"
"Everyone knows you swear."
He raised a fist which caused the employee to actually look up before resuming his game of Temple Run, "-to Jashin! Don't cut me off, you heathen! Some of us have priorities-"
"And one of mine happens to be stopping your insanity from growing." he interrupted once more while leaning on his fist unsympathetically.
"Ugh, whatever! But y'know, this whole hydrogen gots one proton shit, how am I gonna remember that?" Kakuzu raised his left eyebrow uncaringly, "I just need a little saying to remember it!"
"What, daresay, do you mean by that?"
"Like, that Columbus one: "In 1662, Columbus sailed the ocean blue."" Hidan recited incorrectly and proudly.
"1492, Hidan."
"Oh! It even sounds better! See, now I'm gonna remember that worthless shit for the rest of my life." Hidan gave a thumbs up even though it looked like he couldn't care less.
Kakuzu couldn't help but sigh, "But it's hydrogen. Hydrogen is the first one! What else is hydrogen going to be?" He even pulled up his sheet of paper to exaggerate. He pointed at H and practically shoved it in Hidan's face.
"It could be like seven or whatever number heads those dragon monsters have." Hidan whined.
Kakuzu groaned at the reference. Was he testing his patience? "What?"
Hidan flailed around, his arms impersonating snakes with turrets, "Hydras! Yeah, those! What if I confuse the two?"
"Then don't mix them up! Honestly, what idiot mixes up the two?" he yelled, glad they were the only customers in the small smoothie shop. He's been kicked out of establishments in the past when he had lost his "cool."
However Hidan, the usual cause of this aggresion, continued unnerved, "C'mon, just a clue for me? If I forget the first one, it'll be your fault!"
"Fine! If it stops your whine, hydrogen is in water. And water happens to be in nearly every living thing. Therefore hydrogen is number one." the tanned teen snarled, "Hydrogen is number fucking one."
"Like me."
"... What?" he stared incredulously at the cheeky teen. His moment of rage was dying quickly, almost as fast as it came.
"Hydrogen. You said it was number fucking one and I'm the fucking best. So technically, H is for Hidan." Hidan nodded to himself approvingly.
"If you're planning to do this for every element, I will kill you. I will hang you and cut your head off in case you come back to life." Kakuzu threatened sounding completely serious. And one can never really know with his temper...
However, Hidan doesn't really give a crap. "I'm being serious, seriously. If a equals b and b equals c, c must equal a. Therefore H equals Hidan."
Kakuzu literally face-palmed, "I'm about to tie the noose."
"But you can't, seriously."
"If you annoy me any further, I'm sure anything is possible."
"No because then you'd be killing a part of yourself. And then you'd die or some shit because you wouldn't have the vital Hidan within yourself."
"I'm sure I'll find more." Kakuzu shrugged nonchalantly but Hidan 'tsked' and waved his finger.
"But you see, you wouldn't be able to because even though I'm in everything, you're my everything. 'Cuz your the only guy I'm willing to fucking bond with." Hidan paused before smiling lecherously, "And I don't mean covalent bonding, if ya' know what I mean."
"If you're trying woo me, you have a better chance at running me over."
A/N: Gosh, I adore those cliche feel-good movies! Y'know: The Blind Side, October Sky, Stand and Deliver, and just the other day, A Smile as Big as the Moon!
Edit: I don't even know how this chapter turned out all bold... Why didn't anyone tell me? *sob* jk! But obvy fixed, so yeahh.