Disclaimer: Nope. They're not mine.
Sam was very slowly losing his mind. Almost anyone who had ever spent nearly an hour in the car with Anthony DiNozzo Jr could pretty much understand his mind set. Sam had been getting a non-stop analysis of pretty much every spy movie ever made while Ziva tried repeatedly to shut him up but it wasn't going to well. Jesse had barely said a word for the entire trip and Maddy had been buisy entertaining Charlie.
"And then Clooney had this great line-"
"Tony!" Ziva shouted, finally succeeding in shutting Tony up. "Shut up! Charlie has finally gotten to sleep and I will be damned if you wake him up!" She shout whispered.
"Oh come on! I'm not going to wake the kid up with a plot summary of Ocean's 11!" Tony argued back.
He was almost immediately disproved by the tired three year old letting out several more quite cries.
"Shh shh." Mady soothed.
The little boy refused to be calmed and started to cry again. "Maybe he's hungry?" Tony suggested.
Madeline smiled at him and privately decided to get a little pay back. "Wonderful idea!" she complimented before handing Charlie to Tony. "Hold him while I get the food."
Tony held the child awkwardly and he immediately began to cry more loudly. "I don't think he likes you." Ziva commented.
"Well then, Miss All-Children-Love-Me, why don't you hold the bundle of joy?" he suggested bitingly.
Ziva glared at him from her seat by the window before holding out her arms to take Charlie. Tony looked slightly doubtful before handing Charlie to her. "Hi Charlie. I'm Ziva," she cooed to the crying infant. "Can you say that? ZeeVa." Charlie stopped crying and gulped several times before he sniffed loudly, stuck a thumb into his mouth, and buried his face in Ziva's hair.
Tony gaped for several minutes, and made his very best impersonation of a fish. Ziva continued talking softly to Charlie as the sniffs and gulps slowed down. Sam and Jesse let out twin sighs of relief at the momentary silence.
Mady straightened up with a container of dry cheerios in her hand and smiled at Ziva, "I think he likes you. Do you have children?"
Tony almost chocked on the mouth full of water he had just swallowed.
Ziva spared another moment to glare at him before answering Madeline's question with a warm smile. "No, but I had a sister Tali. My mother died giving birth to her and I was nine years old at the time. My father was almost never at home so I took care of her."
Mady nodded. "Would you like to feed him? I was going to, but he looks so comfortable I don't want to wake him up."
Ziva nodded and took the Cheerios from Madeline. She proceeded to feed them to Charlie until he yawned widely, and slipped off to sleep on Ziva's lap.
Tony had been watching the process with a distant but happy expression, when he spoke again it was in a quieter voice. "Now that's something I never thought I would get the chance to see." he said with a grin,"Maternal Ziva."
Ziva Gibbs slapped him sharply.
"Ow! Jesus David it was a compliment!" he protested.
"Really?" Ziva questioned. " Well, in that case, thank you Tony."
"No problem," Tony mumbled rubbing his soar head.
Madeline grinned at the display. They were a lot like Michael and Fi a few years ago. Speaking of which, she had to do some more poking at those two, something was definently shifty with their behavior.
Meanwhile, the pair in question were about to receive a lovely tour of The Jeffersonian Medical Legal Lab. Michael supposed that it was a very beautiful building for anyone who wasn't like him. They probably saw a series of swooping beautiful windows, but all he saw were several prime openings for a sniper with limited tactical cover. And that roof? That roof was definently not safe.
He mapped out the exits (4 of them). And possible weapons (26 visible). That were possibly available to him and Fiona if they had to run for it. He wasn't necessarily planning on having to run, but it was just an automatic response. He could tell by Fi's shifting gaze that she was doing the same thing.
Cam walked up to them, "You must be Michael Westen and Fiona Glennane. I'm Doctor Camille Saroyan the head of this lab. It's very nice to meet you." She held out her hand to be shaken. Michael regarded the hand and the women attached to it before ruling that neither one was a threat in the current situation. He shook her hand. Fiona followed suite.
Angela and Hodgins approached, bringing the sounds of bickering with them. "I'm just saying Angie, that their is defanently evidence for the second shooter theory!" Hodgins argued.
"Sweety, you promised to drop that." Angela reminded him.
"No I promised to drop it in front of Booth." he looked around. "I see no Booth."
"Ahem." Cam coughed for attention but they ignored her. She was used to that habit by now.
Angela was getting more frustrated. She looked for a helper in the conversation. She spotted one in the form of Wendell Gray. "Hey Wendel!" the blonde intern looked up. "Get over here!" she called.
Wendell hurried over. "What's up?"
"Tell Hodgins there was no second shooter!" She commanded.
Wendell hesitated and tried to decide between telling the truth and possibly taking a beating, or abandoning some principles and staying safe. He threw caution to the winds. "Actually based on recent studies in field conditions the second shooter theory-"
Cam let out a shrill whistle and the others stopped talking. "People people! We have some company who are former CIA so why don't we pretend that we aren't overgrown high school students?" She was greeted with more silence. "Good, now this is Dr. Jack Hodgins, he has degrees in entomology and particulates. Ms. Angela Montenegro is our artist, and she takes care of most of our computer functions. Mr. Wendell Gray is Dr. Brennans assistant.
Michael and Fiona summed up the group and decided to proceed with introductions. "I'm Michael Westen, and this is Fiona Glennan." Michael told the scientists.
Angela grinned. "Oh so your Michael Westen." she looked him up and down. "I have to say your government ID photo does not come anywhere near doing you justice."
Michael's only reaction was to blink at her and wrap one arm around Fiona.
Hodgins decided that the conversation wasn't worth it anymore and decided to take advantage of the CIA background. "So you see Wendell agrees with me. Now I'm asking you did the government cover up the second-"
"I will kill you with this pen." Angela interrupted before dragging Wendell away with her to help with a skull reconstruction.
Cam gave up on the fight for decency with her employees and leaned back against the wall. Hodgins waited until Angela was out of earshot before leaning in and asking, "Could she actually kill me with her pen?"
"Yes." Michael answered flatly.
"Really?" Hodgins asked uncertainly.
"Oh yeah. At least 12 ways if she put her mind to it." Fiona answered. A thought occurred to her suddenly, "Michael did I ever tell you about the time when I posed as a secretary to take out a Russian mob boss?"
"I was there Fi," he reminded her.
"Oh," she stopped. "Well it's a good story any way," Fiona launched into the story while Cam and Hodgins listened in amazement. Michael listened quietly and added in the occasional detail when it was needed. A few minutes later Booth and Brennan returned and joined the audience for the story. After a few minutes the pair had the entire lab listening with rapt attention as they worked.
The doors swooshed open and everyone's attention immediately shifted.
The first people through were Sam and Jesse followed immediately by Tony. Madeline followed with Ziva who held Charlie on her hip. Gibbs noted that Tony was lugging Ziva's gear along with his own and couldn't help but smile.
Michael ran a quick damage assessment of his team that Booth recognized was military procedure. Then he asked. "Did you have any trouble getting here?"
"Well if you count a crying baby, breaking every speed limit imaginable, and getting a word for word analysis of all 3 Ocean's movies as trouble." Jesse answered before doping the bag he was carrying.
"So it went okay then." Michael concluded.
"Michael, you should say hi to your nephew." Maddy prompted when she saw Michael edging slightly farther away from the baby. Michael had never been completely comfortable taking care of children even though he was good at it, but Madeline had decided that that habit would be changing.
Anyone who knew Michael watched him carefully as he shifted forward and held his arms out in a rough cradle to take Charlie. They had all learned that Michael could take out a cartel with no trouble, but he still looked uncomfortable with his nephew.
Charlie however, was perfectly comfortable being held by Michael. After a few minutes of everyone watching Michael they couldn't help smiling at the picture.
Charlie rolled over sleepily and looked up at Michael. He considered him for a moment with big dark eyes before burbling, "Dada?" before going back to sleep.
Michael's face boar a remarkable resemblance to the expression of someone who had been hit with a low grade tazer.
A/N: Hey! So what do you think? Tell me in reviews!