Chapter 15 An Education
Warning for lemony fluff at the end.
"How is Maria's orientation year going?" Ludwig asked Gilbert.1 He had asked his brother and Lili to meet with him for dinner during one of the World Meetings. This year, it was taking place in Stockholm. Even though it was the early afternoon, it was also late winter and the sky was dark as they sipped coffee and ate open-faced tea sandwiches at a little café.
"She's doing awesomely, which is to be expected." Gilbert smiled and nudged Lili as he sipped his coffee. "She gets strong reports in English, German, and history with very little effort, and she gets good reports in maths and sciences when she works hard."
"So, where do you think she'll go after her orientation years are over?"
Gilbert shrugged. "She can go to Gesamtschule, graduate, and apprentice with me."
Lili gasped and stared at him. "Nein!" she cried. "She should go to Gymnasium! We discussed this!" She thought they had come to an agreement.
"Ja, Lili, but the more I think about it, the more I think the Gesamtschule would be better," Gilbert admitted. "This way she gets to hang out with a variety of mortals. Not all her mortals are going to be future doctors and engineers; they'll be skilled tradespeople, small business owners, tourism and hospitality workers. She needs to know how to interact with them. She's not going to get that at a Gymnasium. And besides, she's smart, but not brilliant. At a Gymnasium, she'd do nothing but study all day to get decent grades. It would be discouraging."
"All that studying would keep her out of trouble with cute mortal boys," Lili growled. She was hurt at his change in plans, and knew how to unnerve him.
"The first one who tries to kiss her would be called 'fish corpse' and punched in the lips. And that's just what I'll do to him!" Gilbert chuckled, but he saw Lili was still unhappy. "C'mon, Lili, a Gestamtschule is a comprehensive school. She can still take Gymnasium-level classes and the Abitur, if that's what you want2. She might not even want to go to all that effort if she's not going to go to university. She can get her Mittlere Reiffe and start apprenticing with me."
"I want her to get a good education," Lili muttered.
"Mein Gott, she will! She learns more history and economics between the two of us than she would from mortals."
"I have a question." Ludwig looked at the pair. "Why do you assume Maria will apprentice as an entity under you?"
Gilbert looked flustered. "Why not? I've only been a personification in some form of other for at least eight hundred years now. I've been a kingdom, a state, a Communist 'republic' and now a state and region. If I recall," he narrowed his eyes at Ludwig, "I've even raised an empire who became a republic a couple of times."
"I want Maria to go to Gymnasium and to take the Abitur. Even if she doesn't go to university, she should have it available to her." Ludwig took a bite of his shrimp sandwich and chewed slowly, as if the deal were done.
"That's what I want for her also," Lili said firmly. She was happy when Ludwig winked at her and nodded.
"Fine, Gymnasium and Abitur it is," Gilbert sulked. "And she can go study marine biology or ecology or the tourism industry or the genetics of coat colors in Pomeranians if she wishes. But that can happen as a sideline, after she completes her apprenticeship with me."
"I think she should do her apprenticeship with another state." Ludwig sat back.
Gilbert stared at his younger brother, stunned. "Why?" He whispered. "Didn't I just tell you why I'd be a good choice? Don't I have the verdammt experience?" His voice rose. Lili tried to soothe him by stroking his arm but he shook her off, irritated. "Didn't I teach and train you?"
"Ja, you taught me." Ludwig's voice was almost as bitter as the dregs of coffee in Gilbert's cup. Gilbert felt as if a cold-eyed stranger were sitting across the table from him.
"So, look at you now. I did a fine job, ja?" Gilbert's mouth was dry and his heart began to gallop.
"That is a topic for another conversation." Ludwig was in Herr Deutschland mode, and his gaze and tone made it clear he would not be interrupted. "There are a few good reasons for Maria to apprentice with another entity. First, you're her father, her Vati. You're too close emotionally to her. You'll either be too lax because you think she is perfect or too harsh because you'll expect her to be perfect and she won't be able to meet your standards. Second, if she learns from someone else, no one can accuse you of ulterior motives, of teaching her to be your little yes-woman. Third, you could create goodwill by giving someone else the honor and trust of training her. And we all know you can use that."
Gilbert was still stuck on Ludwig's coldness towards him. Didn't he do a good job? Didn't he take the weak, aimless, frustrated German Confederation and turn him into a strong, unified, focused Empire? Ja, maybe he hadn't been as helpful as he could have been during the Weimar Republic, but he had laid the groundwork for Ludwig to rise from that mess. Granted, it was as a monster, but a beautiful, efficient, powerful monster, nonetheless. And even after his defeat, and the Allies had worked him over, he had come back even more successfully, all because of the good habits and traits he had instilled in Ludwig. The diligence, conscientiousness, ambition: they were what he had given Ludwig as much as they had been there within him. "Why are you being like this?"
Ludwig shrugged, a confident being in control of a situation. "Because I am thinking about what's best for Maria, my youngest state. Gymnasium, Abitur, apprenticeship with Saxony."
Gilbert inhaled sharply. "Gisil? He hates my verdammt guts! You talk about me turning her into a yes-woman? He'll poison her against me!" Lili patted his shoulder and tried to soothe him as the Swedish mortals began to stare at the silver-haired man raising his voice. "Mein Gott, why not Monika? Or Holstein or Schleswig? Saxony-Anhalt?!"
"Lower your voice," Ludwig growled. "She should apprentice with an Eastern German state, since she would share the region's peculiar history and challenges." Gilbert curled his lip at the use of the word 'peculiar' but he kept silent. "Saxony is a great success story and he's very good at educating younger entities; he trained Günther, ja? He takes the job seriously, he's firm, fair, and she'll learn a lot from him. Really, he'd be pleased to train her and it could definitely go a long way towards you two getting over your dislike of each other."
"You promise me that he won't take out any of his dislike or resentment of me on her," Gilbert muttered. "If I hear that he is bullying her or mistreating her, I'll—"
"That won't happen. It won't serve anyone if he does that, least of all me," Ludwig said. He gestured for the mortal to bring the check. "So, I think we've agreed on a plan for the future of Mecklenburg-Vorpommern, ja?" Lili nodded and Gilbert grunted after she nudged him.
As they got into their coats, Gilbert turned to Lili. "Lili, I need to talk to Ludwig a little more in private. We'll walk you back to the hotel, but then I'm going out with him for a drink. Is that all right, meine Dame?"
Lili noted the anxious red light in Gilbert's eyes. She could feel his body's energy whirring on the edge of control. She really wanted to hold him and soothe him, but she sensed he needed to clear some things with his brother before he could really relax. "Ja," she said. "I'll go visit with Austria and Hungary for a little bit and you can call me about dinner plans."
Gilbert and Ludwig saw Lili off to the hotel and then Gilbert told his brother he needed to talk to him. The two walked over to a nearby bar and ordered beers. They sipped in silence, trying to look engrossed in a hockey game on the widescreen television. Finally, Gilbert spoke.
"Was I really that bad to you?" He turned to look at his brother, still studying the hockey game. I mean, Mein Gott, everyone whipped their children back then. England, France, Spain, the United States—"
"—I get that." Ludwig's pale blue eyes shone in the reflective light from the television. "That's not the problem."
"Then why did you become colder than Sweden himself when we started talking about Maria's education?"
Ludwig finally turned to look at him. "Because I want her to have that Abitur, Gil. I want her to be able to go to university if she chooses to do so." His eyes were shimmering.
Gilbert shook his head. "But she doesn't need to, Ludi. She's going to represent a state, she needs to…" He stopped, watching his brother's expression move from annoyance to resignation as he turned away. "This isn't about what you want for Maria," he said slowly. "This is about you."
"I wanted to go to university," Ludwig muttered into his beer. "Friedrich III went and he told me it changed his life.3 Gisil told me what his mortals were studying in his universities and it sounded amazing. When Feliks stayed with us in Berlin, he told me about the Polish and German students studying together, singing songs and going on hikes, planning the future in the Ratskellars." Gilbert noted with pity and horror the tears rolling down Ludwig's cheeks. "I wanted that."
"Come on," he teased, "We drank, sang and chased girls in the army also, ja?" He reached over to bop Ludwig's arm, but his brother drew away from him. The longing in his eyes turned to resentment.
"I wanted to learn," he growled. "All these great thinkers in the different states' universities, all these amazing ideas in the 1830s and 1840s, and I wanted to read and listen and debate and understand. And you kept me from them, saying that I wasn't going to be a minister, lawyer or doctor, so why should I bother?"
"We had libraries in the palaces in Berlin and Potsdam," Gilbert snapped. "No one was keeping you from reading the latest books there."
Ludwig shook his head. "I wanted to discuss what I read with others, to ask questions and answer them. I wanted to discuss ideas, Gilbert, and you only cared about plans and goals. Your plans, your goals."
Gilbert slammed his beer mug down. Again, even the mostly drunk Swedish male clientele at the bar looked appalled. "I made you great because of those verdammt plans and goals, you little ingrate!" He hissed. "Blood and iron, remember? Not fancy-ass dreams and theories! You think Gisil could have done the same? You think the love festival with Feliks and his mortals would have continued with no one waking up and say, 'Hey, what are the borders between us?'" Ludwig glowered at him.
"I tried to save you from that," Gilbert insisted. "And if it meant you didn't get to sit in a lecture hall and hear Hegel mumble into his notes, I'm sorry, ja? Now, you can go on the internet and hear the world's greatest Hegel scholar talk about him for free!" He pulled out some Swedish kroner and threw them on the bar counter. "So go ahead, dictate my daughter's future, send her to my enemy to learn everything she needs to know , and let her go to university to learn something useless to make you feel better. Go on, Herr Deutschland, I can't stop you. I'm just the humble state of Brandenburg who raised you from nothing!" He turned on his heel and stalked out of the bar.
The cold air felt good; he liked seeing his angry exhalations appear like storm clouds, he liked feeling the knives stab his throat and lungs as he inhaled. He liked the sting of the cold in his eyes as he stalked through Stockholm's old town. He even liked how numb his cheeks and lips felt. But finally, the anger left and the hurt remained. He turned and headed back to the one place where he knew warmth and understanding lived.
Lili had returned from an early dinner with Austria and Hungary and was checking her email when she heard the hotel room's door unlock. She got up and saw Gilbert standing there. It always surprised her how he could look forlorn and defiant at the same time.
"You want to talk?" she asked. He shook his head as he entered the hotel room. She put her arms around him; he was cold as he rested his chin in her hair. "Tell me what you need, Schatz," she whispered.
"Did I really screw up that badly?" he murmured. "Am I really so terrible at raising entities?"
"Nein," Lili said. She had felt some secret resentment from Ludwig towards Gilbert, but she wasn't sure what it was. And as for Maria, she was impressed by his patience and love for her. "But tell me what you need, Gilbert."
He mumbled something about being loved, about feeling sicher und warm.4 Lili took his hands in hers and breathed on them. She could feel the warmth waking up in his palms. She tilted her head up for a kiss, and his cold lips sent little goosebumps along her flesh. But soon their mouths were warm, his hungry, hers sweet.
"Let's warm you up," she said, and they went to the bed and undressed. When she rubbed his arms and sides, he laughed when she exclaimed how cold he was. After awhile, as she kneaded and massaged him, he thawed and began purring like a cat. Soon they were under the covers, huddling skin to skin, rubbing noses. Gilbert now massaged her, his strong sure fingers gently but firmly squeezing her shoulders, lower back and behind. Lili could feel the stress from the week of meetings dissolving. She moved his hands up to her breasts.
Gilbert stroked and pressed them, tracing his thumbs around her nipples. She could feel a warmth rise within her as she breathed deeply, circulating the energy within herself. Then she felt him pause. "Is it just me, or have these gotten bigger?" He whispered.
Lili leaned in and whispered conspiratorily in his ear. "I've gone up a bra size over the past year."
"Nice," he murmured, caressing her. "All that pastry, ja?"
"Nein," she laughed, biting his ear lobe. "All the energy circulation through breathing and conscious loving we've done over the years."
He studied her, intrigued; Lili felt both mischievous and proud that she was still able to surprise him after a dozen years together. "So it's all that chi you've got in you," he said. "What have you been doing?"
"Meditating, practicing my breathing and imagining it as a wave of energy circulating throughout my body. I got some DVDs and watched videos about tai chi, and I've been talking to China about it. I've been doing my own tai chi every morning for a year now." She said proudly.
"Here, I want to show you something," she continued. Lili removed one of Gilbert's hands from one breast. "Just be still and pay attention," she whispered. She began to inhale and exhale, pressing her tongue to the roof of her mouth. Gilbert's other hand rested on her breast. She felt the energy begin to circulate throughout her body and she imagined it as a little golden ball that she gradually drew toward her breast. It floated there, pulsing and radiating warmth.
She watched Gilbert's expression change from curiosity to puzzlement to awe. "Mein Gott, I can feel it! It's like you have a little heating unit under there." He moved his hand over to the other breast, which felt significantly cooler. "This is awesome," he whispered. He leaned down to kiss the energized breast, and she laughed at how she could feel the warmth diffuse into a little cloud that floated from her body to his. When he looked up at her, she was relieved to see the purple and glimmers of ruby in his irises.
"Care to move some of that good stuff down south?" He whispered and she nodded. He lay next to her, caressing her stomach and thighs, breathing in time to her, as Lili imagined the golden ball traveling back to her hips. It spread gently, relaxing her muscles. She lightly squeezed his erection and guided him in.
It felt exquisite to have him in her, to kiss and look into his eyes and see the hurt mend into peace and confidence again. "Ich liebe dich," she whispered, as he pulsed within her, his own energy growing and meeting hers.
"Ich liebe dich, Lili." He kissed her tenderly. "You're so good to me, Liebling, so good."
Outside, the cold Swedish winter night painted frost on windows and chased mortals into their houses and beds, where they longed for warmth and light. But as they held each other, Lili and Gilbert felt warm and renewed, as if in a perpetual spring.
For the next few chapters, I have only one word for you: POLAND!
1 In the state of Mecklenburg-Vorpommern, years 5 and 6 of a child's education (the equivalent of 5th and 6th grade in the United States) are called "orientation years," when children take courses an an "independent-type" school either affiliated with a comprehensive school or elementary school (Grundschule). These are the years, children are assessed and recommended for the next academic track, which in Maria's state ranges from college-prep (Gymnasium) to comprehensive school (Gesamtschule) with tracks in technical, vocational or apprentice-style education.
2 Final exams taken in the thirteenth year of the German educational system. To American readers, these are the equivalent of taking Advanced Placement exams or the International Baccalaureate courses and exams. An Abitur is a combination high-school diploma and university-entrance exam. Students who pass the Abitur are able to go directly to university. More and more professions that used to work with an apprenticeship-style educational approach, like banking, are requiring the Abitur instead of a Mittlere Reiffe (school-completion certificate awarded if a student leaves the 10th year in good standing).
3 Friedrich III (1831-1888) was the second German Emperor. His mother, Auguste of Saxe-Weimar, held liberal political views and wanted her son to have a classical education as well as the traditional Prussian military training (she was a mortal from one of Saxony and Thuringia's kids, after all). Friedrich attended the University of Bonn and was a very good student; he was the first Prussian monarch to attend a university.
4 German: safe and warm