The Bad Touch Trio & the Goblet of Hilarity

Disclaimer: Muse wishes but does not own Harry Potter or Hetalia or Nyotalia and now, to add to the disclaimer, Supernatural is not mine. No, I do not own Castiel, Chibi, Hufflepuff or otherwise (but he'd be so loved and full of HUGS if he was mine...)

It's Tough being Hufflepuff!

~.~

Leon Kennedy, to the core, was Hufflepuff. This did not bother him. He was quite content for being known as a loyal and hard working person. Besides, sometimes he could even appreciate being easily ignored-especially the Gryffindors' who were notorious for getting into all sorts of trouble (he bore witness to the Weasley twins latest escapades due to sheer boredom and still twitched whenever he looked at the Giant Squid).

But today, of all days Leon Scott Kennedy hated the fact that he was Hufflepuff, and the reason why really came down to this-because he was small and unassuming and sporting the yellow and gold, the notorious Slytherin three (having once leaned on Draco Malfoy as its leader but apparently not anymore) composing of Blaise Zabini with his ridiculously pursed lips and Crabbe and Goyle (who need no introduction they are, as Leon has come to know, your standard cliche school bullies, big and stupid and burly) had deccided that screwing with Hufflepuff's was their job.

Joy.

Castiel Singer, a fellow Hufflepuff even smaller than Leon, tilted his head cutely to the side and stared up at the Idiotic Three in mild curiosity before his impossibly large blue eyes slid towards Leon in silent question; "What is this," (a right bullying) "who are they" (three self important idiots) "What is that smell" (Crabbe and Goyle's stench or Zabini's pungent after shave?).

"May we help you?" Castiel, still with head cutely tilted, asked in an impossibly adorable voice (as adorable as deadpan can be).

Blaise sneered at them with all the distaste that Leon had in his mouth after testing potions in Snape's class. "Loitering round the corridors like bloody walking targets. Stupid Hufflepuff's."

"Targets are mostly, from what I have seen, circular and usually red and white. I am afraid you are mistaken." Castiel righted his head, dark mop of messy black hair to fall into his large eyes as he spoke.

Leon bit his lip to hold a laugh. Castiel might have seemed sarcastic might have been sarcastic had he been someone else, which made it all the more hilarious because he was completely and totally sincere.

The look on Zabini's face reminded Leon of what one may look like after swallowing Goblin piss and Leon would know (he'd pranked Francis and Weasley similarly not too long ago-both had been sick to their stomachs the moment they'd tried to eat or drink anything. Their mouths cursed to taste nothing but troll droppings for an entire month. A wild success in Leon and Draco's opinion who had the brilliant idea to begin with.)

"Oh, think you're so smart, do you Singer?"

"Yes. In fact, I am very intelligent." Castiel answered.

Leon chuckled, earning himself a dark glare from Blaise while Crabbe and Goyle simply stared off into the distance probably imagining supper and what they would eat when the time came. Leon coughed into his fist and straightened himself, trying to look Blaise in the eye (but Leon wasn't tall enough only meeting eye to collarbone).

"Just walking to the library. Didn't know we were bothering anyone by being easy targets...and by the way, easy targets for you usually constitute as first years and Castiel and I aren't first years so-"

"Are you patronizing me, Kennedy?"

"Making a point. Just a point." Leon shrugged.

Blaise right hand twitched, his wand hand, Leon noted with some form of nervousness. He didn't want to draw wands unless he had to, and usually without an audience. Castiel didn't need to see Leon hex anyone (and boy, could Leon do a lot of damage when he was put in a corner) so, while Blaise hand twitched Leon stepped back, grabbed Catiels' wrist and turned his back on the trio. A stupid move maybe, if Blaise decided to strike at Leon and Castiel's back, but then he might not coming to the conclusion that Leon and Castiel were cowards-Blaise was stupid that way. Everyone, Blaise imagined, was a coward if they didn't stand up to him.

"Walking away, Duffer?" Blaise voice rang down the hall. "Afraid of the big bad Slytherin? Coward!"

"Leon?" Castiel asked as Leon's grip tightened on his wrist. Castiel, for his part, seemed remarkably calm for someone who knew second hand about Leon's vile and often deadly temper (Dean, a Gryffindor fourth year, had waxed poetically all the ways Leon had transfigured Ronald Weasley's bedding into a cornucopia of horrors for a week.)

"Its fine Castiel. I don't feel like fighting them its beneath us. Lets just go-"

"Are you running to Bonnefoy? Didn't he dump you for a Weasley!"

"..."

Castiel isn't sure exactly how it happened. One minute Leon is telling him that fighting is beneath him and the next moment, Blaise Zabini is squealing like a frightened woman, turned upside down sans trousers wearing ridiculously feminine undergarments (later Lovina Vargas- a fellow Hufflepuff who seemed patient enough with Castiel to explain things to him that no one is willing to even breech-will explain why thongs on men are just plain wrong, especially with floral unicorn prints) while Leon is shrieking what sounds like;

"HE DID NOT DUMP ME!"

Followed by awkward silence before Leon says;

"WE ARE NOT A COUPLE!"

"Lord in Heaven," Castiel mumbles. "-it is tough being Hufflepuff."

Leon, with wand pointed at a now yellow and black Zabini, growls in agreement.

~.~

Dean Winchester strolled into the hospital wing sporting a broken nose, a bruised cheek and possibly a few broken bones, having had the misfortune to step in and attempt to stop Antonio Fernandez and Ivan Braginski from murdering each other. In retrospect, he should have known better. He was fourth year and puny in comparison to Antonio with his springy muscle and Ivan's bulging biceps, but hey, they were interrupting Dean's lunch and worse yet, had destroyed Dean's cherry pie (let it be mourned, Dean had nearly wept at its demise by Antonio's head being slammed onto the plate) so Dean had exacted revenge.

Sort of.

With his face, apparently.

Madam Pomfrey took one look at him, clucked her tongue in distaste as she pointed towards one of the opened beds. He winked at the matron. "Well hello to you too Poppy. How are we this fine Friday afternoon?"

Pomfrey's eyes narrowed into shrewd black slits, the beginning of a headache blooming.

Dean did this.

Every. Single. Time.

"Not a word! Go, sit down and wait for treatment!"

"Not a word, then hows about a song? Anything." Dean smiled in what he must have thought was seductive (he had all the appearance of someone with bad gas though, but its the thought that counts and woe to Poppy when he grows into that insufferable smirk). "I hear I got the voice of an angel."

The glare Pomfrey granted was, this time, enough to get Dean to stop his flirting-for now. He put his hand up, palm facing outward in surrender as he took to pro offered cot. Across his cot, Dean caught sight of Weasley red hair and freckles. Took him a moment to figure out that it was Ginny-she'd been spelled to look fat apparently and the glower she'd granted Dean made her jaw turn stubborn reminding him of her older twin brothers.

He looked away, stifling laughter at Ginny's sour expression, taking the image of her to be laughed at and teased with merciless pleasure later. His gaze came upon Feliciana Vargas, a Hufflepuff with large doe eyes and the cutest face he had ever seen. Dean, ever the ladies man (and despite his horrible injuries) sauntered towards her, sat on the chair beside her cot and smiled (despite missing a tooth).

"Ve~ oh Dean, what happened! Are you okay? You don't look okay you look really hurt! What happened, ve~?" Feliciana's voice pierced Dean's ears making them ring. Despite the large bruise on her forehead and the the bandaged wrist, she seemed well enough to grasp at Dean's shirt front and lightly shake him.

"Hey! Whoa Feli! Relax!" His hands landed on hers, loosening their hold on him. "Chill, its cool! Just got in a fight is all. No permanent damage." He grinned. "What about you? You okay?"

"Ve~..." Her eyes shifted to the side a blush gracing her adorable face. Dean always did like her best, out of the two Vargas girls. "well, Ivan and Tonio were fighting so-"

"Aw Feli, you got in the middle?" Dean asked so shocked that the flirtatious till to his voice was lost and replaced by profound concern. Feli just did that to people. "Not you too."

"Ve~ you to? You tried to stop them from hurting each other?"

"Hell no!"

"Ve~?"

"It was revenge." Dean squirmed at the curious look on Feli's face after he'd said this. "They murdered my pie. Squashed it during a fight. I don't care about people fighting if it has nothing to do with Sammy or Cas-not Jo cause she can kick ass all by herself so I don't gotta worry- most times I like to watch fighting. They just got my pie, and I was really looking forward to that pie, just came outta potions and Snape rid my ass straight to hell and back. That pie woulda made my day a helluva lot better but they squished it and then...they deserved to die."

It might have been the fact that he'd said this with a straight face, all serious not a bit of joking tone in his voice. Or maybe it was because he'd looked her right in the eye, holding her hands like a sort of proclamation of feelings (if you stood far away enough that's what it looked like, a glorified confession at least that's what Ginny would later say). Whatever it was or however it was, Feliciana giggled, loudly and Dean, having heard his own words, replaying them, groaned. He'd never felt like such a tool.

For pie.

"Its not funny."

"It is a little funny."

Dean's lower lip jutted outward (he did not pout, he will deny it till the day he dies). He made a grunting sound and glowered, dark green eyes shifting towards the ground, freckles sprinkled across his nose lost in the flush that overtook them. Feli rolled her eyes, Dean was just too cute sometimes (though never cuter then Ludwig when he got like this. Ludwig was the cutest boy Feliciana had ever met).

"If that pie meant so much to you...I can always bake you a new one."

Heaven, Dean thought, this has got to be Heaven!

"Seriously? You would do that?"

"Ve~ of course!" Feliciana smiled brightly.

"Awesome!" The grin that spread on Dean's face seemed impossibly huge. "Are you sure?

Feliciana giggled again, happy to make someone else happy. She was certain that her baking skills were good enough to make a simple cherry pie. Francis could help too, he was good at everything in the kitchen.

So excited by her plans of baking and making another person happy Feliciana interrupted Dean as he had begun to speak ("hey listen, you wanna go on a date sometime, cuz you're awesome and I kinda like you-").

Then, she uttered the five dreaded words no boy ever wants to hear essentially stopping Dean in his tracks.

"You're such a great friend."

Dean stared back at Feliciana with gobsmacked expression and even Ginny winced. Rejection was not pretty, ever (plus Ginny was shocked. Who in their right mind in fourth year would reject Dean Winchester?)

Suddenly all was not well in the hospital wing, pies were forgotten and Ludwig Beilschmidt felt a cold and silent chill run up his spine from across the castle.

He looked around for any sign of his sister, or her friends or the Weasley twins (terrifyingly enough, they are the lesser of all evils). Seeing none he returned to his studies. Later he would realize that the sudden eerie chill had been because a new love rival had appeared.

Poor Ludwig.

~.~

-
"Awesome feels a disturbance in the force!"

"Bloody hell...not the force."

"Don't gotta be so sarcastic, Coco. What's the map say?"

"He's just stepped out-why are you so interested in the headmaster?"

"Not Dumbles, per say...just what's in his office."

"...and what is in his office?"

"A sum amount of stuff that we could use to prank a certain house with."

"...to which house are we going to infiltrate?"

"All of them, Coco. All of them."

~.~

-
Muse: ...So hey there! Been an age and a half. Just had some time to update real quick. Inspired by Ask Super Magic Kids tumblr-its all that tumblrs fault, I mean it. But you gotta admit, Mini Huffle Castiel makes Hufflepuff seem all that more cool right? Anyway, this was mostly to set up the next chapter which will have some Luddy, Feli and Dean love trianlgy cuteness, a huge prank on the whole of Hogwarts by Draco and Gillian and of course the conclusion to the Lovi arc. I apologize about Gilly and Draco's part, which was nothing but dialog but I imagined it in a dark broom cupboard while they plotted. *shrugs shoulders*. Meh.

Oh! And I have not forgotten about the Harry and Natalia bit. That...will be an arm all its own starting after the Lovi Arc. BTW, I've never written Dean or Cas, I've never written for the Supernatural fandom so bear with me if they were portrayed badly. I'll try harder.

~.~