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Elena woke with a start. She blinked, dazed before remembering where she was. The room was still dark, but she could make out the shape of things. So she was still in her room. Rolling over, she found Damon was still beside her. She sighed, sinking back down on the bed. That had been a horrible dream. Losing Jeremy, Damon not remembering, Bonnie and Caroline's horrified faces. She shook it off before turning on the bed. Only to see something that ended her world all over again. Her clothes were still in a pile on the floor. Jeans, jacket...not a dress. No, it had to be a dream!
Before she could help herself, she'd gotten up and flown out of the room across the hall. The movement woke Damon up, who was a little disgruntled before realizing something was wrong.
Elena opened the door to one of the smaller bedrooms and found it empty, full of boxes. She hit her knees.
Damon found her that way, kneeling on the floor, arms around her middle, holding herself as she rocked back and forth, crying in earnest. Wordlessly, he picked her up, carrying her downstairs. Again, he held her as she cried, and poured her a glass of his best burbon once she settled down. She took it willingly and drank from the cup several times before taking a deep breath and sinking back into the couch. Damon touched her knee.
"I'll be okay," she assured him, "I think it just hit me all over again."
"You want to talk about it?" He asked, not wanting to push her, but also giving her the option to let everything out.
She shrugged. "I don't know. It hurts to think about. But I feel alone in this, and your the only thing I still have from that life...well, kind of."
Damon smiled a little, "Well, then tell me about us."
She hesitated for a moment, then agreed. "You were my best friend. We had a home and a beautiful life. It was kind of shaky at first, but we made it our own. We loved each other, the way two people are meant to love each other. We had a beautiful baby, and I was pregnant again. We had a real family. You wanted the baby I carried to be a boy, you said that you couldn't have imagined your life without Stefan, and wanted the same feeling for your son, but you'd agreed that a girl would be nice too." Elena laughed a little, and Damon smiled, "And even before then, even before the moment our first son was born, there was no doubt in my mind that I'd made the right choice in staying."
"You were given a choice?" He asked curiously. She nodded.
"I think there might be more to Katherine than any of us knew, and I don't think she's as lost as she likes to pretend. She offered to let me go home. It wouldn't have affected her in anyway at this point, so I guess she just pitied me, I don't know. But it was on our wedding day, when she made the offer. I thought about the life I had here, and the one I'd made there, and I chose you. I meant what I said that night, about liking you the way you are now, but I also meant that I liked you in 1864. The two of you aren't as seperate as you think, Damon. I fell in love with you. Not a version of you, or a different you. Just you. I know you think that I want you to be the exact replica of yourself in the 1800's but that's not true," she reached for his hand before continuing, "I was just able to see a different part of you then, one that I've caught glimpses of here, and I know that you've changed Damon, but I also know that while there are somethings just to accept about you, there are also some things that are still apart of you that you hide with this bad ass, rebel, vampire attitude. But I don't care anymore Damon. Because I know you. The real you, and I know that while you can be a sarcastic pained psycho killer, you also love, Damon. And when you do, it's real, and more powerful than anything."
The vampire in question, just tilted his head to the side, staring at this beautiful creature, telling him that she could accept the monster inside him, telling him that he wasn't lost, and that he could maybe deserve something as good as her, and he wanted so much to believe her.
"Damon. I love you. And right now, I don't need jackass Damon. I need the part of you that you've kept hidden for far to long. I need the husband I remember, the man I know you are. And I'm not asking you to change, believe me. I just know that you are capable of being the stubborn, hardheaded, kind, loving, beautiful man that I gave my heart to. And right now, I need you. Because as much as I love my son, my life in the 1800's, and as much as I pray I'm wrong, I doubt Bonnie will be able to do much to change things back. And it would be selfish of me to want that, it would change too many things here in the present."
Damon nodded, squeezing her hand. "So what do you want to do?"
"Talk to Bonnie," Elena decided, "See all of the options, if there are any at all. I'm guessing you told her what's going on?"
"I texted her a brief summary last night," he answered, "she'll look for something today."
Elena exhaled, laying her head on Damon's shoulder. "I guess we should get back to bed?"
He chuckled a little. "Well it's going on six. Not too early, if you'd rather not go back to sleep."
She raised her eyebrows at him, before allowing her gaze to travel down his still shirtless body, noting that she too was also still in her underwear. "Are you offering an alternative?"
He laughed a little louder at that. "No, Elena, not like this. Believe me, under any other circumstance, I would have had you last night, but I will not take advantage of you like that."
She smiled a little at him. "See, you're already showing your soft side."
He rolled his eyes, before standing up and kissing her forehead, "Come on, lets go get you dressed."
She nodded her agreement, letting him pull her off the couch and started up the stairs.
By lunch time, Bonnie had called, and they'd agreed to meet at the Mystic Grill.
"I'm sorry, Elena, but nothing's coming up," Bonnie told her when she arrived, "I've check everything I can find, but Emily's spell was the only one even remotely close to what you're wanting, but the past has already been set straight. Even if I could draw enough power to perform the spell, it'll just send you back to the same scenario that you arrived in the first time. You'd have to start you're life there all over again."
Elena deliberated, while playing with the burger Damon had bought for her while they waited.
"Then that's it. It's over."
Damon frowed at her defeated tone. "Are you sure that's what you want, Elena."
"It has to be, Damon. I can't risk changing the future here. Who knows what would happen? I can't alter everything, just so I can have what I want. I'm not Katherine."
"I know," He assured her, "I just want you to be happy."
Elena sighed, "I've lost people before, it takes time, but I'll move on." She stood, walking away from the table and heading out the door, probably just to clear her head. Damon moved to follow her, but Bonnie grabbed his arm.
"What?" he asked, almost annoyed.
"There is something else," she added, "Something I'm not sure if Elena should know or not."
I found a spell of Emily's, one she'd hidden from Katherine by writing all of the instructions in some dead language. Fortunately, we have the internet, where they didn't when Emily lived, so I was able to decode it."
He looked out the window, and seeing that Elena had settled on a bench outside, turned his full attention to the witch.
"Okay," he sat down, "What is it?"
"Well, if I were to send Elena back, and she was to marry you all over again, and have children again, they would be the same as before, even though, technically they are different children, the timing and genetic make up would ensure that. Now, I agree with Elena, sending her back is a bad idea, but this particular spell allows time to, well overlap, so to speak, where, when performed, a vampire can be connected with their human selves."
Damon's face settled on confusion. "What are you getting at witch."
Bonnie sighed, "Maybe Elena can't go back to her children, but if she wants, she can still have them...with you."
"Vampire's can't procreate, you know that." He insisted, but highly interested in what she was saying.
"No usually, but with this spell, I can bind you to your human self, you'd be fully human, fully vampire, residing in the same body. If I can get the timing perfect, the same children would be born."
"Here? Without any consequences?"
Bonnie shrugged, "I only know what the book says. But it seems so. The spell with fade, you will lose the connection with your humanity, go back to being yourself, but if Elena gets pregnant before then, the baby can remain in existance."
"How is that possible?"
"How is any of this possible?" She retaliated, "But there are stipulations."
He smirked, "It's a Bennett witch's spell, of course there are."
She rolled her eyes, ignoring the jab. "It's a powerful spell, therefore, I'll need to draw off a full moon to create it. You'd have to have vervain in your system, to hold the vampire side at bay while your humanity is bonded with your body, and finally, as with most things around here it seems, it'll only work with a Petrova Doppelganger."
"You have been busy, haven't you?" Damon, sighed, looking back out at Elena. "So you're saying, I have to sleep with her?"
Bonnie scoffed, "Like that'll be a problem for you."
"Well, believe it or not, I do care about her, and I'm not going to use her for pleasure, simply because the situation has made her all vulnerable and willing."
"Look," Bonnie addressed him, "I already feel shrewed about it. But yes, I do believe that you care about her, which is why I left this up to you. I don't like the idea of Elena with you, or any vampire for that matter, but I will not see her unhappy if I can do anything about this."
Damon nodded, knowing the feeling. "So when do you want to do this witch? Next full moon?" She dropped her head a moment, deciding. "We can, if you really think that this is what Elena would want, It last twenty-four hours, so all you'll have is the day after the full moon. If you tell Elena or not, that's your call, but if it doesn't work, I don't want her having her hopes up, also," She stared him right in the eyes, "You need to really think this through, Damon. You're a vampire, she's human, and with this spell, she'll be able to have human children, but they will still be yours. I don't want to see Elena hurt, and eighteen is young to have a family, especially if your going to be the father of whatever children she has. REALLY think this through, Damon, because once it's done, there's no changing it."
He nodded again, "I'll talk to her first." Then he got up to join the beautiful girl outside.
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