Chapter 5
Archer carefully clipped of another strand of singed hair with a pair of traced scissors. Checking the mirror once more, he let out a sigh of relief. With that last cut, his job was finished. He even managed to keep his hair styled as he liked it to boot. "Giiiiii~" The sound of suspicious drew his attention to his master. Rin's head was visible around the edge of the door frame as she studied him. "Giiiii~"
Giving Rin his best smile, Archer played dumb. "Can I help you Rin?" A slight hint of sarcasm in his tone accompanied his shrug.
Undeterred, Rin spoke, "Did you die again?" Her piercing gaze sought any flaw in her servant's charade. She had been informed about what had happened at the shrine, yet she heard no mention of her servant dying. Not even a vague memory of it.
Taking a step back as if struck, Archer replied in his defense, "Me? Die?" His incredulous tone did little to support his statement, "I don't know what you are talking about." He hoped Rin didn't notice the bead of sweat running down his brow. "Now, you should get to bed, its running late." Then, just as he was finishing the barrier around the Emiya residence was broken. "Rin, did you-"
"I felt it." Rin confirmed, forgetting her suspicious. In unison, the two raced to where they knew the intruder would head. Slamming the door aside, Rin was greeted with a dangerous scene. "Shiro!" She cried in alarm. The boy in question was standing opposite Caster, staring at what the witch held. An unconscious Taiga, oblivious to the danger around her.
A smirk splayed out beneath the carrot on caster's face. As she looked between Saber and Shiro. "I just thought of the perfect revenge." Her free hand pointed toward Shiro, "Zap."
In a blur, a shape jumped in front of Shiro at the last second. For an instant Shiro's eyes locked onto Saber's back. Then the instant passed and he was staring at an armored blue newt. "Saber!" He cried in desperation and surprise. His hands reached out to catch the falling lizard, only for an invisible force to whip Saber-Newt back toward Caster.
Caster's grin only widened. "Of course I knew you would be able to dodge Saber. So I just made sure you dodged where I wanted you to. Now, for the rest." Her hand pointed toward Rin. "Zap!" A great flash heralded the release of power, and a strange metal newt fell before Rin. "What?" Caster replied in shock.
It was Archer's turn to smirk. "You use that trick too often. Now that I've seen how it works, I know all I need to do is put something between you and your target." A hundred swords filled the space between Caster and Rin.
"Tch!" Caster spat, realizing she was in danger. "You haven't seen the last of me!" The first sword pierced her, though rather than blood, her body fell apart in chunks. Each blob of caster forming into a duck that quickly flew away into the night.
"Wait... What?" Rin was the first to speak. As a magus she tended to look up to the Caster class. They were basically the greatest magus' ever to exist. Yet, why did this one choose to learn DUCK magic?! "Seriously! Ducks?!"
A hand on Rin's shoulder drew her attention back from her fuming. "We need to go after Saber." Shiro's serious eyes belied his worry for his servant.
Rin nodded and turned to Archer. "Of course. Going after Caster while the advantage is ours only makes sense right?"
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Once again steps echoed in the night as the three raced up the stairs leading to Caster's base. Rin could see Shiro to her right, but she kept her eyes forward and senses alert. Then a fourth form joined them, his blade inches from Rin's neck. The ring of metal on metal rang out as Archer batted away Sir-not-appearing-in-this-film's blade. "Rin! Go!" With a nod of confirmation, Rin charged ahead, leaving her servant behind to deal with Assassin.
The echo of sword on sword assured Rin that her Servant wasn't about to die immediately. Skidding to a stop at the top of the stairs alongside Shiro, Rin laid her eyes on her adversary. Caster was sitting in the middle of the courtyard surrounded by foliage, Saber-Newt suspended before her by vines. Whatever ritual she was preforming, it couldn't be good. Rin's eyes narrowed at the vines that had overrun the temple buildings and the dense grass that had sprung up everywhere. "She's a pagan witch." She explained to Shiro, knowing the novice to have no idea what was going on. "She draws her power from nature."
The boy in question stepped forward, his bokken at the ready. A wave of Caster's hand put an end to that idea as the wooden sword morphed into a snake. "Agh! What!" Shiro stumbled backward as the viper coiled around his arm.
Any inclination Rin had to help Shiro was silenced when Caster uttered her word of power. "Zap!" Rin jumped instinctively to the side and Shiro just kept running around in a panic as his sword turned snake kept trying to bite him.
Crying out as he blocked yet another snake bite, Shiro yelled in frustration. "What the hell! I'm not gonna die to this! I'm not Archer!"
A bead of sweat ran down Rin's brow as her only backup became more and more a comical embarrassment. Still, she could do this on her own. Mind focused, Rin charged forward. "Zap." A step right. "Zap!" A roll left. "Zap!" Leaping far over the word of power, Rin's hand shown with the power of the gem clenched within.
"HA!" She cried, launching a torrent of magical energy downward. Foliage sprang to life around the woman and lanced upward like a sea of lances. Foliage met magic in a clash of power. Rin did not stop however; she continued her arc straight into the cloud of debris and landed before caster in the smoke. Fist clenched, once more light signaled the power of the gem within. This was it!
Then a hand grabbed Rin's wrist. Turning in surprise, she locked eyes with an unknown man. Caster's Master! She realized her folly as the man's other fist impacted her side, launching her away. Her cry of pain turned to fear when she landed on her back as rather than the sky above her, she saw only Caster's Master, launching a strike downward to take her life.
The blow did not come though. This time it was the man's turn to be launched back by an unknown force. Barely bringing up his arms to block in time, a blur impacted the man and sent him skidding away. Staring up in disbelief, Rin gaped at Shiro standing over her and the weapon in his hand. A rather surprised looking snake stood ridged lengthwise, practically glowing from the mana reinforcing it into a solid, improvised sword. "Wait, what?" Rin uttered, completely flabbergasted by the sight.
"Snake-Sword." Shiro smiled and gave Rin a thumbs-up with his free hand.
Oh God. Rin realized. Shiro was becoming as crazy as everyone else! Struggling to her feet, Rin was unable to thank Shiro for being saved in such a ridiculous fashion. "J-just take care of Caster's Master." She ground out, thoroughly embarrassed.
With a nod, Shiro charged forward to meet Kuzuki-Sensei. Snake-sword met fist in a martial dance of death. Surprisingly, the snake-sword was holding up far better than Shiro would even think his bokken would. Alternative weapons did have their place apparently. "Kuzuki-Sensei. Why are you with Caster?" It wasn't so much an accusation, as Shiro truly wished not to think of his Sensei as an enemy.
Scratching his nose, Kuzuki-Sensei coughed. "Carrots are cute..."
"Eh?" Shiro stuttered. T-that was something. Shaking his head, Shiro decided to accept the explanation as the fist lancing toward his shoulder was a bit more pressing. With a parry and a step, Shiro launched his own strike.
Kuzuki-Sensei narrowly avoided a thrust of the Snake-Sword. Poison gleamed off the Snake-Sword's fangs as it opened to take a bite of the man. Then he stepped in and launched a jab at Shiro's face, only for the Snake-Sword to bend sideways and block the blow. Skidding back a few feet, Shiro locked eyes with his Snake-Sword in surprise. A grin of comradeship greeted him. "Snake-Sword!" he cried, manly tears in his eyes.
"Aye, Partna!" The snake sword replied; its Scottish accent thick, "Lets dae thes!"
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Rin mutely pretended not to notice Shiro talk to himself. And kept her attention on closing the distance between her and Caster. The woman, no longer underestimating Rin, used the foliage to constantly grab and try to pin down Rin. With every step she had to dodge the foliage around her, grabbing to pin her down. All the while Caster continued to unleash her word of power. However, this would not stop Rin. Something drove her to win. It wasn't her pride as a magus. Nor was it her desire to survive. No, the all-consuming drive that forced her to win was the realization that she was the last sane one left. Sanity had to prevail over this insanity!
Once again, Rin jumped forward and danced into Caster's guard. This time surely! Instinct screamed at Rin and she headed it, jumping backward and away from the blade that passed through where her neck would have been. Sir-not-appearing-in-this-film drew his blade back up and rested it on his shoulder, placing himself between Rin and Caster. "Rin!" Shiro, called out his attention drawn away. His opponent capitalized on this and sidestepped Shiro's guard."Aaggh!" Shiro cried as he flew across the courtyard, skidding to a halt next to Rin.
All of a sudden things looked rather grim. Three on two. "You took care of the pest?" Caster remarked with sadistic glee.
"Of course." Sir-not-appearing-in-this-film's deep voiced joined her in evil joy. "Framed for ten counts of murder. He'll never see the light of day again."
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Elsewhere:
"I'm telling you I was set up!" Archer protested from his position bent over the police car, his hands cuffed behind his back.
"Yeah, yeah. Tell it to the judge!" The unfazed officer replied, Forcing the counter guardian into the back of his cruiser.
Rin tensed, realizing there was no hope of success. Shiro rose to his feet beside her, realizing the same. They both could sense it. Running now would only mean Sir-not-appearing-in-this-film's blade in their backs. Shiro dropped his Snake-Sword. Or rather, it dropped of its own accord. "Gie it ay haur." It spoke over his shoulder. "Ah will hauld them aff."
Shiro clenched his fist to his chest, once again manly tears threatened to be shed. "Snake-Sword..." He muttered, not noticing the confused look that Rin was giving him. "You can't-"
"Fa th' heel dae ye thin Ah am!" Snake-Sword shouted, his booming voice silencing Shiro's protests.
Nodding, Shiro grabbed Rin's hand and turned to run. The sounds of a great Snake-Sword's last battle chased him away as tears trailed in the night air.
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Shiro and Rin found themselves lost within the night, resting against each other's backs. Any praise Rin might have given Shiro was squelched by two things. First, she didn't want to encourage whatever insanity was being born within Shiro. Two, he was in a terrible mood. He hadn't talked. She knew it was hard for him, leaving Saber behind like that. Also something about his snake sword. Whatever, refer to the first reason why she wasn't going to get into the 'Snake-Sword.'
"Hey, Toshaka."
Rin turned her head slightly, "Eh?" She was surprised at the lightness of his tone. "We should go ask Illya for help." He stood up, causing her to fall off balance both from lack of support and surprise.
"Are you kidding!?" Rin exclaimed. "That bunny will bite our heads clean off! You must be crazy!"
Rather than rise to her energetic level, Shiro clenched his fist and looked at it. "Crazy ideas seem to be working really well." Snake-Sword... I won't let your sacrifice be in vain. "Besides, we don't know unless we try." He gave his best smile to Rin, charming into going along with his idea.
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The sounds of battle emanated from within the Einzbern manner, ushering Shiro and Rin to hurry. When the two exited the hallway and hid behind the railing, their eyes found a truly breath stealing scene. Berserker, The Rabbit of Caerbannog, danced around in a blur. Dodging attack after attack, missile after missile. Knocking away any stray projectile that even approached Illya.
"Oh-hoh! You father was a sloth! And you mother was a turtle!" The assailant drew Shiro's attention. Opposite Illya and her defender stood a man in chainmail and a skullcap. His twirly mustache and accent belied him as French. With a wave of his hand an illusionary rampart formed just below him. Above and behind him, objects of all types materialized. Pots, pans, rocks, buckets, a bicycle and a shrine gong, even a few chickens and other fowl. Dropping his hand, the projectiles shot forward, once again pressing into Berserker's defense.
"Berserker!" Illya cried in fear, sensing her servant grow ever more tired.
Another annoying laugh sounded from the Frenchman. "Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh! German muck-hauler! My fort holds all projectiles! Despair you nit witted, prepubescent, smelly, rather dull baby!" Only one object materialized this time. The sphere spoke danger to Shiro. Incomprehensible danger. The cross atop the sphere was pulled by an invisible force. "One, two, five! I mean three!" The sphere shot toward Illya, only for the rabbit to intercept it.
Shiro covered his ears in pain as the earth-shattering explosion deafened everyone in the room. Ears ringing, Shiro could barely find his balance as he watched the Frenchman take a step toward the cowering Illya.
Always, I seek the quest.
Words were felt on the edge of Shiro's consciousness. Who?
Forever perusing that distant dream.
The Frenchman was but a few steps from Illya, the girl fighting back tears.
Selfishly, I seek to save.
Illya's arm was trapped by the man who took her protector's life.
Yet never have I saved one.
His free hand reared back, his fingers straightening into a lance.
My hands are stained with blood.
Illya stared into the eyes of the Frenchman, finding pools of depth as time stretched out.
Yet I continue.
The hand lanced downward toward Illya's heart.
Dramatic Maiden Rescue!
The world changed. No longer were they in the Einzbern manner, but in a floating hall of windows. One of which shattered as Lancer flew through, holding a vine that was attached to... nothing. Swooping in, he swiped the Frenchman's prize at the last minute, continuing to swing up and away before landing on a railing that was totally there a second ago.
"Ha ha!" Lancelot cheered, stepping off the railing. "Wherever a (plot significant) maiden is threatened! I will be there!" His sword was drawn and pointed toward the fiendish Frenchman. His other arm held Illya close.
"English pig-dog! Your stupidity is below that of a pile of feces! Did your master not forbid you?!" The Frenchman was actually rather angry.
Smirking, "Of course! Even his command seals wouldn't stop me from dramatic rescue! I see now it is you who are the fiends! You'll not be taking the heart of this fair maiden!"
Yet rather than more anger, the Frenchman began laughing once again. "Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh. Truly, my master, the sniveling choir boy that he is would fail like this! But you are wrong!" The Frenchman removed his skullcap, locks of hair falling around him like the noble hair of a lion. "I'm French! Love is second nature to mua!" Then he smiles as the air glittered around him. To call the man pretty would be such an understatement the fabric of the universe would tear itself apart to correct the mistake. "I've already stolen her heart." Then he winked at Illya.
Quirking an eyebrow, Lancelot turned oblivious to Illya. "What!" he cried in surprise, finding her blushing and staring longingly toward the Frenchman. "You have got to be kidding me!"
With that, the Frenchman turned to walk away. It was best to transplant the grail soon. Young love waned fast after all.
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Elsewhere:
"Guilty!" The gavel echoed throughout the courtroom, sealing archer's fate. "Your sentence: DEATH PENALTY!"
"NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Archer's cries were drowned out as he was dragged off toward the gas chamber.