Shakily, I sat down on the step I'd been standing on. I could only remember vaguely what had happened, it's like everything happened so fast, it was a blur. I remembered turning to see Erik after getting ready for the finale and singing with him, what had we sung again? Erik hadn't sung anything with Christine when it was them. Wait. Fuck. It was me. I was going to be Aminta and Christine wasn't.
The story had blown so far off track that now everything was a mess. It was all my fault; somehow, I'd messed up the greatest love-tragedy ever written. I felt goosebumps run up and down my arms and shivers rack my body. God, what just happened? All I wanted to was to go to sleep and wake up back at home with my brothers. I needed to go back to a world that made sense, not this crazy one. Erik loves Christine, Christine loves Raoul, Erik tried to kill Raoul, but lets them both go. That's it, the end. I was never supposed to be in this story to begin with.
It was chaos around me; everyone was running out of the building and getting as far away from here as they possibly could. The managers were in a tizzy, they were barking orders at the staff for them to call the cops. Of course, they had the right idea, leaving the way they did. I just couldn't... bring myself to get up and move
"Danielle, are you okay?!" Christine shook me by the shoulders. I blinked through my confusion and tried to shake the goosebumps away.
"Christine, I don't know." I looked at where the trap door had been moments before. "We need to find Raoul. Quick. I don't want him to get hurt, or worse." I didn't want to think about the possibilities now that the story had gone so far of course. I got up and slowly made my way down the stairs, holding tightly to the bannister for support. Christine looked shaky as a leaf, she would have collapsed if I had tried to lean on her for support instead. I had no idea how she was keeping herself up and going.
"Christine are you alright?" I asked. I needed to be strong, I thanked God that Christine wouldn't be put in harms way anymore, but he had stolen her engagement ring right off her neck and called her spirit betraying and, by the look on her face at the time, that was pretty bad. I know I'm stronger than her mentally and maybe physically, it almost destroyed her in the movie to sing with the Phantom, but it was even worse when she decided to save Raoul by sacrificing her life for him. Well, now she didn't have to do it because I was going to be the lead. Fuckity fuck fuck. Why haven't they invented chocolate ice cream yet? That'd make everything a little better.
"I think so but I'm so worried about Raoul," she said. I could tell she was lying; she was shaking all over. Okay, Raoul jumped down the trap door and found himself in the mirror maze and Madame Giry got him out of there, so they should be talking about Erik's life in her office, unless it took longer than expected. Well, where else could I tow her around? Actually take her down to Erik's lair and look around? Hell-to-the-no.
"Don't worry about him, I'm sure he's fine." I tugged her in the direction of Madame Giry's office.
"Danielle! Are you alright?" I looked around and saw Henri sifting his way through the chaos towards us. Crap, I really didn't want to deal with damage control right now.
"I'm fine! Henri, go! Do the smart thing and get out of here!" I waved him towards the door.
"I can't just leave you here!" He looked so distressed; he was such a good friend, but I couldn't take any chances anymore, I didn't know what was going to happen and I couldn't take the chance that Henri would be okay.
"Please, I'll be fine, just get out of here for the night and promise you'll come back and dance for Don Juan! I won't be able to do it without you!" I called. Henri had reached us by then and pulled me into a fierce hug. I hugged him back without letting go of Christine's hand.
"Alright, no matter what I'm going to come back for you; count on that." He turned and went to the door, disappearing into the crowd. I hadn't realized I was crying until Christine handed me a handkerchief. I dried my eyes and made my way through the few people who were standing around still, not knowing what to do. I could hear voices from behind the door and knocked urgently; Madame Giry answered and ushered us inside. Raoul was sitting in a chair on the other side of her desk, perfectly unharmed. Christine ran to him and threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly. How cute.
"Danielle, are you alright?" Madame Giry pulled me into a seat beside Raoul. I huffed and rubbed my face, tired and confused, not the best mix in the world.
"That's all anyone's asked me; how can I know if I'm okay if I don't even know what happened?" They all looked at me as if I was crazy. "Am I the only one who remembers that he can put people into trances with his voice? I'm pretty sure that most of the time, people don't remember what happens afterwards. Now tell me, what happened?" They all looked incredibly uncomfortable. I'm betting it was something really bad.
"You sang with him," Christine said, finally.
"That's it? What with the looks you were giving me, I thought it'd be worse; it's not like I took my dress off and did the cha-cha." I felt my muscles begin to untense.
"How can you be so calm about this? He put you under a trance and forced you to do his will! God, if he wanted to he could have... could have..." Raoul seemed unwilling to finish his sentence.
"But he didn't." I finished, almost tired of this conversation.
"But that doesn't explain how calm you're being about the whole situation! How could you possibly," he stopped suddenly, like a thought had come to him. "You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?" I looked around the room at the now shocked faces. "That's what you didn't say, isn't it? that this, all of this, was going to happen." I refused to look at my lap like a meek girl, but I also refused to meet his eyes. I stared straight forward.
"Yes." I didn't elaborate. I could feel Raoul gearing up for a tirade I didn't care to listen to. "What song did we sing together?" They were stunned to silence. "Well? What was so scandalous about the song?"
"I could not tell, it was in Italian." Madame Giry spoke for the first time since asking me whether I was alright or not. I felt panic in my gut. No. I thought, agast. He couldn't have. "It certainly seemed like La Carlotta knew what you were saying." So she had caught it too. That brief look of understanding and utter horror. Of course the Italian Prima Donna understood.
"He kept calling you his Sweet Soprano." Christine spoke so softly I almost didn't hear her. I wish I hadn't. My body went cold and I stood, abruptly, and walked to the door. "Where are you going?" Christine asked in alarm.
"I need to get my bag from the coat check." I left the room and everyone followed me, I could almost hear their brains ask who lit the fire under my ass. I barged through the door and passed the attendants, quickly locating my purse and shawl. resting atop the other things in my purse was the notebook I kept all of my thoughts in. It held poems, thoughts, dreams, words, songs I had thought up in my spare time. the pages had seemed to become thicker and it closed less easily than it used to when it was new, the end of the pages usually curled over the spiral, making a small crease in the page. I always had to be careful to close it after making sure the paper had been righted. The book almost fell open to one of the songs I had written near the end of my most recent hospitalization. Sweet Soprano.
"Danielle, what is the meaning of this?" I was shaking with rage. I stuffed the book back into my bag and grabbed my shawl. I shoved them into Raoul's arms and walked to the door, vaguely aware of the fact that one of them had somehow managed to get the attendants out of the room. My money was on Madame Giry. I turned to them, feeling the fire tumble out of my eyes.
"I need to see a ghost about a horse," I said in my most sarcastic voice.
"You can't go after him, he'll kill you." Raoul grabbed my elbow and I shook him off.
"Not if I maul him first." I spat out; I wasn't in the mood to talk. "You just wait in Madame Giry's office until I get back. If you hear screaming, good." I opened the door and was almost free of them when Raoul had to go and say something that stopped me cold.
"You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?" I turned to face him, hadn't he gotten this out of his system earlier? Why was he bringing it up again? "Why didn't you, with all your knowledge, prevent it?" I turned to him, giving off my best bitch attitude.
"Because that would change the story, and how can I mess with one of the great classics?" Again, I turned to leave.
"Did it go like it was supposed to?" Raoul asked in a whisper. I turned again, ready to close the door.
"No. The casting is wrong."
"How?" I let out a shot, humorless laugh.
"It was supposed to be Christine." I shut the door and left, intent on getting what I wanted, and getting it now. I quickly walked down to the tunnel I had memorized like the back of my hand, making sure that I kept the noise from my feet to a minimum. Wait, why did I feel the need to keep quiet? I'm mad as hell, he's going to have to deal with the noise. I stomped down through the tunnel and made just enough noise to make it bearable to listen to. As the light from the candles hung around his home came into view I Yelled.
"Erik Destler, you got some 'splaining to do!" I stepped out of the tunnel and looked around for him. He was standing with his back to the organ, mask off and still dressed as the red death. "Tryin' ta intimidate me?" I crossed my arms and let my hip jut out. "Not happening."
"Danielle, what a pleasant surprise; how was your stay with our dear vicomte? I trust you've gotten the running around out of your system-" He sounded ready to go on, but I cut him off.
"What the living fuck is your problem?" I walked toward him and used my hands to indicate to myself. "I have forgiven you for almost every horrible thing you've done to me. I forgave you for strangling me and slapping me blue; I forgave you for routing through my things before and I was almost ready to forgive you for kissing me but this, this is unforgivable!" He didn't have his make to hide behind anymore and I could see the emotions playing out across his face. "You went into my bag and stole my private notebook and leafed through it until you found a song that you thought would be a laugh and a half to sing." I closed the space between us. "Did you think you were going to get away with that? Well, too bad, you're not." His eyes turned dangerous, they almost appeared yellow. How had I not noticed this before? I'd never looked into his eyes while he was this mad before. "After this little performance of yours you can kiss your chances of ever getting on my good side goodbye."
"Are you trying to threaten me?" He ran his fingers through the curls that had been kept down for the style and smiled cruelly. "I find that precious." I resisted the urge to spit in his face, so I smiled back at him. I ripped the mask off of my face and pushed his chest, causing him tob stumble back.
"I love how you can act so calm about invading my personal space like it's your right, you bastard! You can't just do whatever you want just because the mood strikes you! That book was filled with my personal thoughts, my ideas, you had no right to violate it with your dirty mitts!" Wow, dirty mitts? That was lame and Erik knew; his face splitted into a sardonic grin. That only made me angrier. "I wish I'd never met you!" I screamed. " How dare you stick me into your sex fueled fantasy opera!" Erik swung me around so I was trapped against his chest and the organ, causing me to look up to meet his eyes. His large hands closed around my wrists, effectively trapping me. I tried to pull away in vain, his hands went all the way around my wrists, leaving no weak point for me to target and use against him.
"You will be in Don Juan and you will be Aminta, whether you like it or not." His voice was low and dangerous, but for the moment I didn't care. "You will do as I order." How could this man be the same Erik that had been such a close friend to me this past year? Now he was just a sick man.
"You're damned right I'm going to be Aminta." Triumph shone in his eyes and a pleasant smile, not one fueled by anything malicious settled on his lips.
"It's good you finally began to see things my way." He let my wrists out of his grip and I pushed him away."
"Enjoy the rehearsals and be sure to remember the performance, afterwards I'm quitting." Erik's eyes went wide with the news. Maybe I'll make some shit up just to rub salt into the wounds. "Raoul has offered to adopt me as his sister. With my fame and his money I'm sure I'll have a fine living." I walked passed him and, as I stood at the mouth of the tunnel, I turned back to him. He stood stock still looking at me, the deformity on the side of his face made weird shadows dance across his cheek. I could see his eyes glowing yellow. "Your story is coming to an end, Phantom. Enjoy your solitude." I left Erik in his lair to think about what was to come.
"What are you going to do?" I looked from my reflection in the mirror to the reflection of Christine in the doorway. The maid was still pulling the pins out of my hair, but I guess the one helping Christine was faster, she was all ready for bed. I just needed to wash my face and get the last of the pins out of my hair. The maid finished, so I thanked and dismissed her.
"About what?" I turned to face Christine who now stood with her back to the door. I ran my fingers through my hair, completely destroying the curls that had been put in for the Masquerade.
"You know!" She looked around, afraid of what she had to say next. "The Phantom." I rolled my eyes.
"I'm going to do my job and then I'm going to quit and move far away." Christine went white. What now?
"You're going to go through with it?" Was she stupid?
"Of course I am, if I don't that'll only mean something bad will happen to me, you, Raoul and everyone I care and don't care about at the Opera Populaire. I don't doubt that, in his rage, he will stop at nothing until the debts we owe him are payed." I rubbed the makeup off my face with a washcloth I rubbed water and soap onto. Black smeared across the white terry cloth, I hope it won't leave a stain.
"Doesn't it frighten you?" She asked, bewildered.
"No shit. But sometimes you have to suck it the fuck up and do it anyway." I turned to face her instead of talking to her reflection. "Life isn't a Cinderella story, life can be shit dragged through the mud from here to Kingdom Come; life has hardships we have to stand up to, we can't just get knocked on our asses and refuse to get up; that's the cowards way out. And I am certainly not a coward." Christine let the shame show all over her face. "He's expecting you to be there too, you know." She looked up, shocked and horrified. "He wants everyone to see you, the great Prima Donna Christine Daae, reduced to the status of a chorus girl. I guess he means to teach you something." I rolled my eyes.
"That doesn't explain how you can still be so calm about this," Christine said. I stood up from my chair and walked over to her, taking her hands in mine.
"Christine, I'm already going to die, what worse could he do in the short amount of time that it will take to get this show up and running?" She bit her lip and looked down. "I don't think even he's capable of that." I swatted her shoulder. "I think we need to go to bed and get some sleep, who knows what's going to happen tomorrow." I knew there were a lot of questions that Christine wasn't asking when she bid me goodnight and left the room.
I lay in bed for hours before I realized I wasn't going to sleep that night. I wonder if anyone else was up like this. I wouldn't doubt it; Christine might not sleep for a week since Erik scared the hell out of her and stole her engagement ring. Why the hell would he do that if he wasn't planning on forcing Christine into marriage? He could sell it; with the contacts I'm pretty sure he has it won't be really hard and he'll be able to make a pretty good profit. What am I thinking? Erik probably did it for the dramatic effect or something. Drama queen. Wow, was I biased. And in Erik's favor. What's wrong with me?
I watched the sun come up slowly and I got out of bed. I heard the early morning staff scurrying around. I can't believe that it was only a short time ago that I had to work like them and I don't anymore. I needed to talk to Raoul about the idea of living with him and Christine after Don Juan was over. The opera was going to burn down afterwards, I hope Madame Giry and Meg have a place to go. I know the other ballerinas have families that will let them stay with them until they can get a job at one of the less popular Operas in Paris. God, was I already planning for the end? I know I don't have an unlimited amount of medicine, I'll only have time to live with them long enough to get my affairs in order and have a small will for the things I had. If I died, my things from the future needed to be buried with me or, better yet, burned. They could give my dresses and clothes to the homeless and sell the jewelry I had. Though, I'd like Christine to keep it to remember me by; the rose would look beautiful in her hair.
I dressed and went down for breakfast. I wasn't really hungry, my stomach was doing flip flops. I looked at the food laid out on the table before me. I grabbed some toast and a boiled egg. I smothered the toast in blackberry jam and took a bit, hoping it would stop my stomach from rolling. I hoped the egg was hard boiled, I hate the yoke. Nasty baby bird juice. Great, made myself sicker. I ate bits of the egg; thankfully the yoke was hard. The silence was so think I could cut it with a spoon. There was a loud bang and Raoul groaned loudly.
"Are we just going to sit here and not talk about it?" He insisted. I looked down at my half eaten egg. "You refused to speak about it at all last night and today! What is going on with you Danielle? What are you going to do?" I slammed my fork down.
"What the fuck do you think I'm going to do? I'm going to sing and act and never go back to the Opera as long as I fuckin' live! What else can I do? Rebel? He can kill me at any moment and, while I am dying, I'd prefer to live a bit longer, thank you very much!" Why was I so angry? Where was this anger going to lead me? I'll only end up being terrible and unhappy. "Raoul, he's the Phantom of the Opera. He knows that place like the back of his bloody hands, don't entertain the idea that we could ever beat him. He does whatever he wants and kills whoever gets in the way." He didn't used to act like that. He used to be a sweetie. I thought, sadly.
"So you are just going to sit back and let him control you? What happened to the Danielle who was so defyant, just for the fun of it? The one who acted so childish and womanly at the same time? What happened?" I stood from my seat so fast I knocked my chair down behind me.
"Who said anything about controlling me? I'm saving your stupid asses! For all we know he's mad at you for stealing Christine from him, he might try to kill you. If I distract him enough, he may forget about you. I'm not doing this because I want to, I was happy being a maid and taking dance lessons on the side and helping the other servants in the Opera House." I walked around the table to him and punched him in the arm. "Do you think that there has been any time for jokes in what's happened so far? We could die!" I left them and walked to my room. I sat, staring at my reflection in the mirror. We had to back in a day to begin work on Don Juan. God, I was going to have sing Aminta, to the most impossible score ever written. All I wanted was to go home. I wanted my brothers and my town, and the harbor, the beach, the clock tower, the beautiful cobblestone streets, all the trees. I missed my life.
I was stuck here until I died, which was coming up. I was Aminta. Me. I let the tears I'd been keeping at bay for that past few weeks out. What could I do now? Everything was hopeless. I wanted my brothers, I wanted my mom; I needed her so badly, now more than I thought I ever would again after those terrible first few years without her. I needed Blaise, if I had someone to talk to maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I was stuck here with no way of getting home or more medicine and I was going to die. Moreover I had let my favorite musical get twisted. God; I'd ruined The Phantom of the Opera.
Well, there it is. I know it's kind of boring. Sorry. Remember to review, I only own my OC's.