Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice
"Slow Down."
Dark shadows. An Alley.
Run.
"Come on Baby, we're not gonna hurt you."
Don't look back. Ignore them.
"Hey, slow down, we just wanna have fun."
Burning heart, aching lungs, sweaty palms.
Never in my life did I wish to fly as much as I had then. They were catching up, my steps were slowing down. I need to get away.
Find light, I told myself. Somewhere with people!
I ran and ran unable to feel the soles of my feet.
I stumbled and fell, hitting my head on the concrete. I could feel darkness threatening to enclose me; it started seeping through the corners of my eyes.
I woke up with a start, my body was sweaty as my vision became white and bright lights popped behind my eyelids. I felt myself breathe hard as I looked to check the time. 5:47, the digital alarm read.
I fell back against the bed shivering with cold sweat now. I wrapped the covers more securely around me. My throat felt parch, I wanted water but it really wasn't worth it to go downstairs for just that.
I had been having the same dream for a week now. Some nights would reveal more than others. I would dream of alleys and darkness and then wake up horrified. Today's dream was by far the longest and scariest.
"Another one?" I turn to see Kitsuneme sitting on my window sill, his face glowing in the moonlight. He truly looked like an angel.
"Yeah," I say getting up.
The dream seemed familiar, it was like a locked up memory. I couldn't place it nor did I remember what happened afterwards. I did, however, have a pretty good guess of where it was from.
"Kitsuneme, do you remember how you died?" I asked hoping I wasn't being insensitive.
He looked surprised by my question but he straightened his features out, "Yes, it's the one memory I remember vividly from the time I was human."
I frown, "Why can't I remember? I remember everything and everyone, yet I can't recall my most important memory."
Kitsuneme looked thoughtful for a second, "I don't think it's a bad thing really. Sometimes we can't remember something because it's too painful. I think, and I could be wrong, but maybe you're hiding the memory yourself because it's not something you want to remember."
I grimaced in the darkness. At first I didn't care that I had forgotten, but now that I was being haunted by these dreams, I couldn't help but feel frustrated with the memory. I wanted to know what happened to me.
"You want to go back to sleep?" Kitsuneme asked from the window.
"No, I don't think I can anymore." I got up and went to the bathroom to wash my face. I dried my face and looked at the mirror. Luna's face had gotten fuller and her once hollow cheeks had gained a pink glow. This could be the result of my gluttony though. Although she looked healthier I did end up getting her dark circles below her eyes.
I hadn't been able to sleep since I spent most of the time tracking Natsume and the rest having nightmares.
There had been no progress with Natsume in the past week. I found out that he had these gang meetings twice a week, mostly Mondays and Thursdays. Most of the planning happened then, they were organized in there way of wrecking havoc around town. Disturbingly organized, might I add.
Kitsuneme later explained that it had taken them two weeks to plan the burning shop incident since they needed to find the right time and get the right back up to keep police and any security at bay.
The only development that occurred was during lunch when Ruka picked me up after class to join him and the gang. I took Sumire along when she offered to eat lunch with me.
It was a joyous event. If I closed my eyes and made myself forget that I was in Luna's body right now, I would feel alive again.
Hotaru, Ruka, Natsume, Koko, Anna, Nonoko, Mochu, and Sumire. They all sat under a Sakura tree passing food and laughing at something Koko said.
It was just like old times.
They had welcomed me warmly and even offered me food. I sat across from Natsume, he raised an eyebrow questioningly at me as I sat there nibbling on a carrot. I looked toward Hotaru who waspretending that I didn't exist and didn't just infiltrate her lunch time. Koko went off gossiping about something that Hatsune told him, who heard from Kakani, who found out from Nana, who was told by some girls.
I laughed and gasped in all the right places while I watched Hotaru and Natsume from the corners of my eyes. Natsume was eating an apple and had a water bottle next to him while Hotaru ate a tiny salad. That couldn't be enough to last a whole day. I looked at the place between Natsume and Hotaru where a tree branch sat. That was supposed to be my spot. I joined in with the jokes remembering some that Matrimony told me. Koko laughed in delight and slapped my back even offering to drop me off to my next class. I had forgotten how easy it was to talk to him.
I changed into a white tank top and put on dark sweats as I headed downstairs to grab a drink of water. I had two hours to spare and nothing to do.
I looked into the fridge for a snack when an idea occurred to me.
"Kitsuneme, how well can you cook a French cuisine?" I asked the angel who was juggling oranges in his hands.
He looked at me questionably and I smiled evilly.
(^-^)
It turned out Kitsuneme was a gifted chef. When I asked how he knew so much he told me that he lived with the guys from the security department in the castle and he was the only one who knew how to cook.
I was glad for his skills and used him to my advantage, not feeling the least bit sorry as I watched him cut a tomato fluidly.
Hotaru loved France. For as long as I can remember her dream has been to go to Collège des Sciences et de la Technologie. It was one of the most prestigious technical colleges in the world. She had gone to Paris a few years ago and eaten the cuisine there, she told me it was one of the best foods she had eaten, and I, in order to make her happy, had tried to make it for her but failed miserably.
Call it a bribe or call me desperate but I needed Hotaru to talk to me, and I needed to get that sad look away from her stoic face. It was making me crazy.
We finished just in time for Sumire to come down in her uniform and sniff the air happily.
"Something smells really good. What is it?" She asked looking at me.
"You'll find out in lunch." I told her as I wrapped the dishes in cloth tying a knot three times to secure it.
She gave me an appraising look when she saw me wrapping the food, "You know it's like you're a different person, Luna."
I stopped what I was doing and looked at her. "I thought change would be nice." I said. I regretted choosing Luna's body only because I would have to look Sumire's face everyday and lie to it. And I hated that.
"Well it is. Its just that I…I don't know. You're so cheerful and happy lately, you've even started to be nice to mom and me, especially me. I just don't know what to make out of it, I guess." I watched her struggle for words.
"I just…I really want to be friends with you." Just like old times, Sumire.
She looked at me with a mixture of confusion and happiness, "Are you sure you didn't hit your head when you fell?" She asked.
I didn't know if she was being serious or was joking. I laughed not knowing what else to do.
She smiled. "Well, I've always wanted to be friends with you, and I'm glad you want to too, even though it seem like you're out of your mind."
You have no idea. "Great, then help me put this in the car."
She smiled and took the bento.
I changed into the uniform and this time decided to curl Luna's wavy hair putting it into an elegant half up do. I concealed the dark circles under my eyes and grabbed the book bag making my way down stairs.
I had time to slowly eat my breakfast thanks to my early wake up call. I slowly chewed on my cereal trying to look as dignified as possible in front of the father and stepmother.
"Remember you have an appointment with your physician at four today so come back right after school." The evil stepmother told me and I nodded smiling, to which she blinked back.
"Dad, will you be taking me?" I asked.
"Yes, I'll pick you up from school." He said looking at me.
I finished my cereal and grabbed my book bag. I waved goodbye and rushed to the car.
"Sorry Garnet, am I late?" I said as soon as I entered the car.
"No, it's quite alright. I think it's the earliest yet in fact," he smiled at me through the mirror and sped up.
I put my head against the window watching the scenery blur by. Garnet drove fast for an old guy. He parked in front of the school and Sumire and I got out. I ran to class as the five minute warning bell rang through the school.
I hid the bento in my bag as I entered first period just in time for roll call. Today was Tuesday, which means Natsume got enough sleep. At least I wouldn't have to deal with his grouchy mood for the day, although he would be off doing satanic worshipping tonight. I went and sat in my assigned seat next to him. He was reading his manga, his eyes looking over every detail of the page.
I leaned close to his ear and yelled, "HI NATSUME!" Immediately the manga fell from his hands. He turned and glared at me.
"You know, one of these days, I will strangle you." He said picking up his manga.
"That still won't shut me up." I said as I waved a hello with my hand to Ruka who waved back, amused.
"Then I'll extract your voice box." He said opening the manga and trying to find his place in it.
"And I'll scream the whole while you do it."
"If it makes you permanently quiet, I will gladly bear with it."
I frowned. "Heaven will cry loosing an angelic voice like mine."
He ignored me then. I narrowed my eyes willing him to talk with my mind.
No response. I sighed and turned my attention to the front of the room.
Two minutes later~
Poke. Poke. Poke.
Vein Pops. More poking.
"What?!"
"How do you graph 2y-5x=18?"
"You change it to slope-intercept form first, idiot."
"What's that?"
"Make it y equals."
"How do you do that?"
He leaned over my side of the table making my heart race, "Like this…"
I looked at what he had done with the confusing equation, "OOOHHH! Now what?"
I cringe as Natsume bangs his head on the table.
"Just put me out of my misery, Cleopatra." I hear him say with his head on the table.
I grin, "And what fun would that be?" Times like these made me forget that I was currently in someone else's body. It was so easy to be myself with Natsume.
He looks up at me and is about to reply when suddenly fire alarms go off. They make a deafening sound throughout the school and paralyze every student to their seat.
Is it a drill or an actual fire?
"Everyone remain calm and exit through the emergency door in an orderly fashion." The teacher says and starts directing students out of the classroom.
I walk out the door with Natsume and Ruka behind me. We exit through the emergency doors on the left of the classroom with the class. When we get out I look back at the school, I see smoke coming out of the left wing which belongs to the science department.
Something probably went wrong in a lab or experiment. I look to see that the whole school evacuated outside. I look through the sea of faces trying to find someone familiar.
I see the gang to the far end, but I can't see Hotaru. Natsume walks up to them with me and Ruka following behind him.
"Where's Imai?" He asks right away.
It's Anna who replies, her forehead creased "She has Chemistry first period. I don't think she evacuated."
Natsume curses under his breath and rushes to the nearest door, dodging teachers on his way. I run behind him as two teachers try to stop him trying to tell him how dangerous it is inside.
He enters the building and runs to the science department.
"Natsume wait!" I yell from behind him trying to catch up.
He pays me no heed and continues running leaving me to run and catch my breath at the same time. He turns left to a hallway filled with smoke. I inhale and start coughing.
I take off my uniform blazer and cover my mouth with it following Natsume into the smoky haze. I can't see anything as my eyes start to water but I continue walking. I hear a small scream and follow the sound turning left and entering a classroom.
There's fire licking the floor, it's spreading from chair to chair and in the midst of it I see Hotaru trying to run while fanning the fire with her sweater. Her leg is bleeding and she had a bruise on the side of her forehead. Natsume hurries into the room and runs past me.
He runs to Hotaru and puts his sweater over her, shielding her from the flames as he carries her out of the room. I run after him as he makes his way out of the classroom and back into the smoky haze.
Theirs fire in the hallway now as we run. The fire spreads through the wooden door in front of us and blocks our escape. We run the other way trying to find another exit.
"Let go. I can walk." I hear Hotaru say as we frantically run.
"Shut up and cover your mouth." Natsume replies to her.
"I said let go." She says stubbornly.
"Will you be quiet? I'm trying to get us out of here." I can tell Natsume is running out of breath, theirs nothing covering his face, he's inhaled too much smoke.
Hotaru shuts up and we continue running. How long is this hallway? The ceiling starts creaking.
"Natsume, watch out!" I yell.
But it's too late because the flames from the cloth draped on the door fall on Natsume as he only has a second to shield Hotaru and take the damage alone.
I watch as his shirt catches fire and burns his back. Hotaru screams and Natsume puts her on the ground and rips off his shirt. He has red marks covering his back along with bruises and scars.
I mutely hand him my blazer but he shakes his head, refusing to take it. Hotaru gives back his sweater and he refuses that too, walking ahead and still looking for a way out.
"Take this before I break your skull, Hyuga." Hotaru throws the sweater and it falls on his head. He looks back at her and then wordlessly puts it on. I offer her mine but she ignores me and walks behind Natsume.
The door to the end of the hallway is burning. Natsume gives it a hard kick and it breaks down. I hear a noise behind us and watch as the ceiling starts to break down, the pillar on the left gives out and the roof starts falling down. I look at Natsume in fear.
I hear a low oath but I don't know if it was Hotaru or Natsume that said it.
"Hurry up!" Natsume yells at me and I run out the door after Hotaru with Natsume hot on my heels.
We run for the exit as all around us the roof starts breaking. It takes me a minute to realize that Natsume isn't behind me anymore. I reach the exit and turn to look for him. Oh God. Where is he? Hotaru realizes this too because she starts walking away from the exit.
But I can't have her in here anymore with that damaged leg. "Hotaru get out of here," I tell her as I grab her arm. She shakes it off and continues walking faster now.
I grab her arm and start dragging her. She's only going to hurt herself more and we'll be back to square one. She struggles against me, "Let go, Let go of me!" She breaks free and I grab her again pulling her by the arm.
"Can't you hear me!? I said let go! He's still in there!" She says almost hysteric now. I look back to see unshed tears in her eyes. This stubborn girl.
"I know. I'll go back for him." I say softly and start dragging her again. I hear her protests; at this rate we'll never reach the exit.
"Stupid Hotaru. You're supposed to be the calm one." I say and punch her. She reels back and falls unconscious. I drag her out the door where I see teachers and students standing.
"There you are! Oh my, what happened?" Some teacher I don't recognize says to me.
"Take care of her Sensei." I hand Hotaru's unconscious body to her and run back inside, ignoring the protests and cries from behind me.
I run inside covering my mouth again. It's been a few minutes and Natsume does not have anything to cover himself from inhaling the smoke. I run to the door that we enter from but I can't see him. My eyes start watering from the smoke as I run from door to door looking for the red-eyed boy.
I spot him in the corner of the hallway sitting against the wall. His head is against the wall and his legs are spread out in front of him. He seems to be breathing hard.
I look around to see nothing but smoke with no trace of fire in the area. I run up to him and kneel beside him once I reach him.
"Natsume! Hey, Hey!" I shake him. His eyes are closed and it looks like he's inhaled too much smoke.
"Natsume! NATSUME! Wake up! You can't die on me now!" I start slapping him hysterically. This is it. This is the end. I wasn't fast enough, I didn't pay attention. And now he's dead, not even less than two weeks in the hundred day mark.
I started crying, slapping him harder, pushing him, and kicking him. Wake up idiot! Wake up. I can't loose you yet. Not to fate, not to destiny. Please.
I watch through my blurred vision as he lets out a breath and says something.
"Mikan." He whispers.
I freeze. How long has it been since I've heard the sound of my name come from him? I stop hitting, wiping my tears, I try talking to him.
"Yes. I'm right here." I whisper. I watch as he cracks an eye open and then the other. I watch him smirk with effort.
"Does this mean I'm in heaven?" He breathes.
I watch stupefied, did he want to die? Did he want to leave this world that badly? My eyebrows furrow and I feel the familiar frustration and betrayal come at me full force as I watch him smile more peacefully than I've seen him since the moment I came to save him on this damned planet.
I felt like a complete idiot. Here I was trying to save this boy that I loved more than anything and he was ready to throw away everything and die.
In a way it was like I was keeping him away from what he's wanted all this time.
I slap him across his face. Hard. My tears come back with renewed vigor and I see him open both of his eyes looking at me and then turning his head around as though he's searching for something.
"Cleopatra? Did you…? Wait, where's Mikan?" He says looking around.
I look at him bitterly, "You know, loving someone is noble but loving the memory of a dead person is just creepy and sad."
He snaps his gaze at me and I see the familiar lines of anger in them, "What are you talking about? People like you need to know when to mind their own business."
Like I haven't heard those words before. "I'm not the one who's about to die in a freakin fire while muttering my dead girlfriend's name."
He grabs my arm and puts a strong grip on it. I feel the formation of a bruise as he pulls me by it so that I'm on my knees and at eye level with him.
"I decide what I want to do with myself. Whether I want to stay alive or if I want my body to burn to ashes, it's my wish alone. And you get no say in that." He says and lets go of my arm.
I glare at him. I really feel like beating him to a bloody pulp right now, but I ignore the feeling and instead pull him by his arms. He looks at me with disbelief but I ignore it and instead concentrate on pulling him to his feet.
"Let go," He says dangerously.
"Not until you get up," I gasp and continue pulling.
I don't give up and he sees my stubbornness because he finally gets up to his feet and I let go my hold of him and instead grab his right hand.
I start leading him to the exit. I get a few steps before he wriggles out of my hold. This idiot has already inhaled so much smoke I don't understand how he's still standing. I grab his hand again and he pulls it off again.
I sigh and grab again this time dragging him by the wrist and ignoring the pain it's causing my arm as he tries to take my elbow out of my socket.
"You're the biggest moron on the face of this planet." I say as I drag him.
"Then let's do the earth a favor and let me wipe my existence from it," I hear him say from behind me. I ignore the sharp needles that pierce my heart from his comment.
"Mikan Sakura right?" I ask, feeling a bit weird saying my name.
He doesn't say anything and I continue, "You met her at age seven and she left you at age sixteen. You started dating when you were fifteen after she confessed to you."
He still doesn't speak a word and I continue talking, "You had a good run and fell in love. But then she died at sixteen leaving you alone."
I wait a heartbeat and finally hear him talk as I turn the corner getting closer to the exit. He stops struggling and I hear him say, "So what?"
I turn around as we enter the room with the exit door. I face him, "So now you're bitter and depressed." I say.
"I'm not emo if that's what your thinking, idiot girl."
"If not, then how do you explain your stunt earlier?" I ask looking him straight in the eye.
After a while he holds my gaze, "I was tired. I couldn't move so I decided to see what would happen if I asked God to take me to her." He says honestly.
"So you're tired of living?" I ask this idiot.
"Pretty Much." He says staring deep into my eyes.
I laugh. It's bitter and short and so void of emotion that it almost sounds evil, "Yeah. You're the exact definition of emo." I look at him seriously now, "She'll hate you for this."
"What are you talking about?" He furrows his eyebrows.
"Your idiocy. Your retarded head that's keeping her from existing in peace. You are so full of it!" I finally burst. "When she was alive you couldn't cherish her enough and now in death you're giving her misery. Do you think she's happy? Do you think she's jumping in joy watching you throw your life away? Don't you think that maybe even now she's crying because of you? She cries every night and prays everyday for you to lead a happy life, for you to live a long life. But what do you do? You throw it in her face! You throw your life away and run to death!" I gasp out of breath. I can feel the fire entering the room as I hear it lick the wooden floor and the familiar smell of burnt wood comes to me.
Natsume looks angrier than I've ever seen him. He's features go from angry to shock and to angry again. "You…what are you talking…" He doesn't seem capable of finishing the sentence.
I sigh and start dragging him. "Please. Please, don't throw away your life. I told you I was Cleopatra right? I was brought back to life by her so that I could tell you." I tell him. I feel him stiffen behind me.
We walk outside where teachers and now firemen have gathered they run to us when they spot us.
I turn and face Natsume one more time. He looks at me with new emotions, a little bit of recognition, some amazement but more than that, he looks at me like he did before. When I was alive. "Ridiculous girl," he says and then tries to walk away but I stop him before he takes a step.
"I'm serious. Throwing your life away isn't fair to only you; it's also injustice towards her. If it's so hard to find a reason to continue living, then start living for her." I look at him with tears still in my eyes.
His eyes soften; he turns his smoldering gaze at me, and just as countless other times my thoughts escaped me when he did that, they do it again and I loose my train of thought.
"Live for her?" It was a question directed to himself that he spoke out loud.
I smile and turn away wiping my eyes as I go to look for Hotaru. I watch as gurneys are brought out and several students and teachers are put on them. I look to find amethyst eyes among the stares I get while walking away from Natsume.
I spot her arguing with a paramedic who clearly wants her to get on the gurney but she keeps refusing. She looks annoyed and her cheeks are flushed, probably from the heat of the fire.
I run up to her, "Hotaru!" I yell. She turns her icy glare at me. Uh-oh. I have five seconds to react as I see her pull out the familiar silver gun from her side. She shoots and I comically land upside my head.
I feel like laughing. She's alive, I'm okay and Natsume's still breathing. I smile at her and this time dodge the second bullet that was aimed at my rib cage.
I run up to her and wrap my arms around her slender frame, burying my head in her thick hair. She wriggles and tries to get out of my grasp but I just tighten my hold on her.
"Get off, baka," she utters and again the desire to laugh comes again. I had thought that I've heard that too many times in my lifetime but I was wrong. This was my Hotaru and she was talking to me just like she used to.
"Hotaru! Luna! You guys are okay!" I let go of Hotaru as Anna and Nonoko come up to us, with Koko and the others a few steps behind them.
"They want us to evacuate out of school grounds." Inchou comes up beside Nonoko.
"Where do we go? I don't have a ride until school ends." Mochu mutters.
Suddenly I remember the bento still in the classroom. "How about a picnic?" I ask the group as Natsume makes his way towards us.
They all look at me with question marks hanging above their heads.
(^-^)
Fifteen minutes of arguing pf where to sit and who should come, and then we find ourselves sitting on the grass by the playground beside my old house.
Natsume and Ruka had both left since they lived in the dorms. I had said bye to Natsume and to my surprise he had smiled, or well smirked. It's not possible for that boy to smile.
"What's that?" Koko asks eyeing the blue wrapped bento beside me.
"This, my friend, is a bento." I say grabbing the box and unwrapping it.
I had begged a fireman to let me go back to the classroom so I could get the bento. I had told him there was something very important in my bag, but that didn't work so I decided to threaten him using the Koizumi name. It was a complete bluff, but to my surprise he didn't question further and took me inside the building to retrieve my bento. I didn't need him to come with me, the science building was on the opposite side of where I had class but I didn't argue further. I successfully got the bento and although it seemed like he wanted to say something about coming back into the classroom for a simple bento, he bit his tongue. Makes you wonder exactly what the heck the Koizumi's are.
I took out the plastic ware and handed it to everyone. I looked at Hotaru but she was looking away with an evident crease on her forehead. I took out the cuisine and the different juices that I had packed. There was a gasp, but I was looking at Hotaru, gauging for her reaction.
"Hotaru look!" I think it was Anna that yelled, but it could also be Nonoko.
She turned her head like a robot, like she was forced to do so. When she saw the foreign dish in front of her, her eyes narrowed and she snapped her gaze at me. I smiled, a bit put off by the weird reaction she gave me.
"Do you want some?" I asked her cheerfully.
"I'm good." She replies and gets up. I watch as she walks away from the group and makes her way to the playground. Well, I can't say that her reaction was unexpected. Still, she could have at least tried some.
"Mmm! This is good!" I watch to see Koko and Mochu both stuff their mouth with the food.
"Don't worry about her Luna, she's always been this way." Koko said to me. I smiled at him but got up to join Hotaru who had perched herself on a swing.
"I'll be right back, enjoy the food guys." And with that I left them and ran to sit on the swing next to Hotaru.
When she saw me approaching she started getting off. I ran like a mad woman and took hold of the chains holding the swing, locking Hotaru so that she had no escape.
But the infuriatingly stoic girl simply stared at me, "What do you want now?"
"Sit." I commanded and stood there for another second making sure she wouldn't move.
When she didn't, I moved out of her way and sat on the swing next to her. I didn't know what to say to her so I just sat there.
"Now what?" she asked me after a few stifling moments.
"Now we swing." I told her and gave a little push with my legs to emphasize.
I watched as she gave a hard push and swung back and forth. She stopped the swing in mid flight and started getting up.
I was about to say something, but then she looked at me and said, "done." Ugh, insufferable woman.
I caught her arm as she was about to leave. She wrangled her arm out of my grasp, "What is wrong with you, why won't you leave me alone?" she gave me a hard, cold glare.
I felt my heart drop, "I'm trying to be friends…" I say loosing my voice.
"And I already told you that I wasn't interested." She said to me.
"You said you acquaint yourself with those who are special." I remind her.
"We've been through just how special you are." She rebutted.
"I just became someone very special."
"Oh really? Let's hear it then. How are you worthy?"
"I'm the reason you're standing and breathing right now." I remind her.
Hotaru looked like she was at a loss for words. I smirked inwardly knowing that I had won. She looked at me like she wanted to kill me, then swiftly turned around and started walking away from me.
"Wait! What the heck, Hotaru?" I call after her.
She snaps her head at me, "Don't call me so informally!"
I grab her arm. I have had enough, first my boyfriend becomes suicidal, and now my best friend gets people issues. Can't a dead girl get some peace around here?
"Stop! It's me. It's me Hotaru, Mikan." I tell her. She reels back and I see her form go rigid and her arm turn stiff in my hand.
A/N: Phew! These chapters just keep getting longer. But this was a nice get away from all the senior application crap. Why are colleges so demanding? Well whatever. Review anyone?