Ron's Worst Nightmares
Dr. D Learns His Place
By Pat Squared
It was six months since Drakken last saw his former sidekick Shego. He noted that something was different. Sometimes the sarcastic edge was softened ... as if she was someplace else.
She actually missed me. Maybe ...
A familiar blast of green plasma stopped Drakken's line of thought before it got to far or his hopes grew too big for his little brain.
Shego did not kill him or even hurt him yet. That was a good sign ... wasn't it?
"Dr. D. Sit down and shut up. You have been planning the missions. What do we get? I get an excellent cardiovascular workout with Kim Possible and you get ... Ron Stoppable blowing up our latest doomsday device. This I have to bust our sorry rears out of prison."
"Ron who?"
Shego's left hand lit up in an all too familiar green glow.
Drakken did not like where this conversation was heading.
"This time, it's my plan, my schedule, and you will do exactly as I say. I am not going to let the last act of my criminal career end up like the five hundred seventy seven other abortions you planned."
Did she say last act ... Shego can't quit. Who's gonna make my Coco-Moo in the mornings ... Who is gonna listen to my rants?
"Yes Dr. D. This is my last act as your sidekick. I am gonna effectively give you your own country. One with a security council veto and a couple nukes."
"Wisconsin. I want the biggest block of ..."
Shego punctuated her displeasure with another blast.
"Wisconsin is a state you moron. California produces better cheese. Haven't you been seeing the commercials they have been putting out. Good chess comes from happy cows and happy cows come from California"
"But ..."
"But what ... I said country, not a frigging state, you freak. I am surprised that you managed to figure out how to breath when you were born. Think ... country ... Think permanent UN Security Council veto ... Think nukes ... Think about the wine and cheese."
"Is it Japan. They have cool toys."
The look of annoyance on Shego's faces told Drew Lipsky that it was time to duck.
"France you idiot. If I gave you Japan, don't you think that the ninjas will have your head severed from your body within twenty four hours of your taking over their homeland.
"I am giving a country that no one likes. The English are exactly fond of the French. The Germans aren't exactly fond of the French either. All you have to do is to do is to make sure your puppet do not threaten your neighbors and I guarantee that even you will be able to hold onto France."
"Am I gonna be king."
"No you dumb shit. Just shut up. Do as I say and you will own the government of France before the end of Lent."
"Lent, what is Lent."
Shego shook her head. Even though Drew Lipsky was born and raised Jewish, anyone raised in Middle America should have enough familiarity with the Christian liturgical calendar.
"Passover, before Passover."
"When's that?"
Shego was now really pissed off. She is risking her chance at a normal life to help this idiot. The guy was suppose to be Jewish. Can't he figure that one out.
Drakken made the final mistake of asking Shego where France is.
For that Shego made him run around in circles for a while dodging plasma blasts. By the time Drakken collapsed from exhaustion, he figured out that she was the boss and that he was going to be the sidekick.