"You know what? Just forget it. I just lost interest in the matter." That's her seriously angry tone. She's arguin' with that dumb Cajun again.
"Chere, come back, Remy can explain-" Explain? What's he done this time? If he's done what I think he's done, he can kiss his balls goodbye. I don't hold with people upsettin' Rogue, and he's been pissin' me off for a long time now. The only reason he's survived this long is 'cause she seemed to want him around - and why she does that is gettin' increasingly unfathomable.
"No, no, I don't think you can. Leave me alone, Remy."
"Rogue - la petite and Remy weren't - I want to-"
"I don't really give a good god damn what you want, to be honest. Just stay the hell away from me." Yeah, slam the door on that piece of shit. Don't think she's seen me here yet. To be honest, I feel more than a little responsible for all this - I mean, I kinda nudged her into goin' out with the skuzzball in the first place. But she was happy for a long while, and I thought I'd done good. Lately, though, it's just been falling apart, they're arguin' all the time, and she hasn't been spending much time with me. I think she knows I'll get it out of her, make her tell me what's goin' on. That's why I'm here, kinda. I decided: she needs to sort it out, and I'm gonna make her do it, like it or not. It looks like I maybe just missed the boat on that one. Partly I'm here because I miss our talks, though. "Oh! I didn't see you there."
That's what I like about Rogue. She don't ask what the hell I'm doing in her room, sittin' on her bed, listenin' to her row with her boyfriend. She just accepts it. "You two arguin' again?"
She's close to tears, but holding 'em back. She don't like to cry. I don't know if she got that from me, or if she was like that anyway. I kinda think the latter - she's always been cocky, even when she was half-starved and cadging a lift in the middle of nowhere from a completely unknown mutant cage fighter with claws. Took a deep breath to steady herself, and gave me a half-grin that don't fool me an inch. "Yeah. So what's new?" Sat down next to me like her legs wouldn't hold her up much longer. She's shakin' like a leaf.
"It over?"
Even the half-grin can't hold up to that. "The fat lady's been singing for a while now. I was just pretending I couldn't hear."
"C'mere." Aw, she just about crumbled when I put my arms around her. Poor little thing. She may do a pretty good impression of Big, Tough Rogue to everyone else, but underneath, her heart's soft as butter. She's got almost as good a control over it as me, though. She only lets a few sobs out before she gets a grip again. I ain't lettin' her go just yet, though. She's breathin' pretty hard, and still shakin' fit to burst. Just gonna hold on, let her ride it out till she's calm again. Only bad thing about her breakin' up with that asshole is how upset it's got her. I'm lookin' forward to kickin' his ass. She didn't appreciate me tryin' that when they were still goin' out, gave me a chewin' out I'm not likely to forget, but I get the feelin' she won't mind so much now. Just to let her know she's got someone to look after her, if that idiot won't. God, if she were mine, I'd never hurt her like this.
Whoa, hold it... Back that train of thought up a little, there.
If she were mine? Where'd that come from? I mean, sure, she's gorgeous, and funny, and quick, and she has that smile, and the way she says 'sugar' has been known to make grown men spontaneously combust (once literally, in St. John's case), but I'm not of their number. She's just... just Rogue. Not that I don't think she's sexy as hell, now she's all grown-up, but I've known her four years goin' on forty and we just don't got that sorta thing between us. She was too young, or too taken... and I wasn't interested.
I'm not interested.
I'm not.
Hell, okay, I am sorta interested. I mean, how could I not be? I'd have to be dead not to notice her. She just has this confidence, when she moves, like she's a queen or somethin'. Somethin' magic about her, and it ain't her mutation - it's just her, all her. But she ain't available. I mean, now, technically, she is, but not to me. She don't think of me that way. And anyhow, it'd be a bad idea. I don't wanna screw around with Rogue.
Damn, gotta get rid of that mental image, in case she ever touches me and sees it. Livin' with mutants has its down sides, one of which is the difficulty of keepin' your thoughts to yourself.
I have a thing about Jean. Yeah. Sexy, redheaded, unavailable Jean. And Rogue knows that - she's always known that, everyone knows that - I've never been what you might call subtle. Maybe that's why she's never been interested. 'Cause she knows I'm holdin' out for Jean. Not that I am holdin' out for Jean, though - I know she and I, well, we're never gonna happen. It's not 'cause of Scooter, really - it's more that I can't imagine ever havin' a life with Jeannie. Just can't picture it. One night stand - yeah, I can picture that. I do picture that, possibly more than is healthy. Can't picture it leadin' to anythin' good. Rogue would be disappointed in me...
And why does it keep comin' back to Rogue?
Damn. I've gotta get out of here. Just as soon as she's okay. She's stopped shakin', now. "You feelin' better?" Yeah, that muffled answer ain't givin' me much confidence. "Listen, Rogue... I'm sorry."
"Sorry? What're you sorry for?" God, she's gorgeous. Look at those big eyes, all teary, and that pink nose, all sniffly. So close - I could lean just a bit and I'd be kissin'... "Logan?"
Fuck. Goddamn. I've gotta get outta here. Damn, but she's - I can't leave her like this. Crap. Crapcrapcrap. And she's still starin' at me. Gotta say somethin'. "I'm sorry you went out with that asshole. I'm sorry I said it was a good idea. He wasn't good enough for ya. Hell, no one in this crummy place is." Myself included. "You didn't deserve the crap you put up with from him."
Bit of a smile there, thank god. "Thanks, Logan. You're a good friend."
"Sure, kid. But I mean it. You're a good person, and don't let him make you think otherwise. It was about time you kicked his sorry ass to the kerb." Gotta get outta here, gotta get outta here. "You should go out with your friends, have some fun for a while." Smile a bit brighter. Good. I'm not so bad at this, you know.
"I think you're right. I need that. You wanna hit the town tonight?"
Aw, hell. When I said 'friends', I didn't mean me. "Uh, kid, I can't... I've gotta..." Aha. Inspiration. "I dropped by to tell you I'm gonna be away for a while. I've gotta go do somethin'." Put some distance between us 'til I can get my brains in order again. "Um, unless you really need me around...?" 'Cause if she really, really needed me, she'd say, right? I'd stay if she did. I'd be able to keep a lid on it, if she needed me. This is just a - a glitch. That's all. Shit, she looks like I've kicked her.
"No, no. You go. Take care of yourself, okay?"
"Rogue, really, it can wait if -" Feelin' guilty as hell, now.
"No. It's fine - I'll be fine. I mean, I knew it was coming. I've got to spend some time getting my head in order. You go on - I'm gonna give Kitty a call, see when she's around. Or I might head out of town for a while, myself - go to one of the Professor's places. That'd be good. I haven't done that in ages."
No. Not for ages. I know, 'cause usually I go with her. Damn, this is all wrong. I wish I hadn'ta said that. "Rogue, I'll stick around - it don't-"
"NO, Logan." Shit - now I've made her cross. Why can't I do anythin' right with her? "Go. I don't need - I should spend some time by myself. I want to stop relying on everyone else to take care of me." Fuck. I've screwed this up. I dunno what to say. She's hustling me outta the room. "I'm gonna pack. I'll be fine, really. I need some time to sort my head out - god knows it's messed up enough. Take care of yourself." A tight hug, and she's chucked me out. Damn. I don't know what to do. I'd better go. I'm obviously not thinkin' straight. I'll go away, and by the time I come back, she'll be okay, and I'll be okay, and we can just go on like before.
That sounds good to me. I'm outta here.
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