"We perceive when love begins and when it declines by our embarrassment when alone together." - La Bruyere
Jasmine: (Sweat drop) Okay, guys, I know I'm late…but I've been on vacation for the past week, and I forgot to tell you I was leaving last chappie…I'M SO SORRY!(Sigh) Don't own it, never will… I hope that meager little apology is enough...(Giant sweat drop) Well, next chappie, here we go! …Fixed bayonets! CHARGE!
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The Difference Between Love And Loathing - Chapter Four: Clash(With Saito, Misao, and Kondo in the ninja's living room, March 17, 2005…6:27 p.m.)
When Misao's anger finally cooled down (it took some stern words to the detective from Kondo before she would even stop screaming), it was decided (not by the wolf or the weasel, so you can guess who's idea it really was) that Saito should have a tour of the house before he moved in. Neither was very keen on the suggestion (nor was it their own), but the police chief insisted…which meant that they had to do it.
"Well, I'll just take my leave for now, my boy. Have fun! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"
…And Kondo got to escape out the front door and into the car, leaving a certain wolf without a way to get back to his house. Which also meant that he'd be stuck with Misao until the police chief decided to return and pick him up. Joy.
The sarcasm is running thick like a river of gooey molasses.
Oh boy. The ninja still looks murderous. We'd better avoid the kitchen, and any sharp objects on this little tour…who knows what may happen with a wolf and a weasel alone in a house together?
Get your mind out of the gutter, please.
Thank you.
Saito nonchalantly shoved his hands into his jeans pockets and looked about the room, pointedly ignoring the fuming little woman covered in noodles next to him. How had she managed to screw up cooking soba? Nonetheless make it explode? Either she was a bad cook, or just a really unlucky one…
All the same, he'd have to make…peace…with her. That didn't mean that he had to stop calling her itachi musume, though. Teasing the little weasel was quite entertaining…the faces she made at him were the best he'd ever seen. The way her blue-green eyes would smolder as she glared at him, her small hands balling into fists… Misao had looked like she wanted to pound the crap out of him, despite the fact that he was supposed to be her bodyguard.
As you should be able to tell, Saito is having a fairly good time messing with the itachi. Let us see how the said girl is fairing…
Jerk…jerk…jerk…jerk…big jerk…stupid jerk…grr…I'll kill 'im, the jerk…
Oh boy…
Why the hell did the guy have to be so…rude? Gah! Sure, he was hot and all, but…weasel…she didn't look like a weasel, did she? Surely not…
Baka man. Baka stupid man. Baka, stupid, extremely hot, drop-dead gorgeous man. …Wait…
Misao sighed angrily and raked her hand back through her hair again, ignoring the little squishy noises of the noodles as she did so. Ugh…she might as well make…peace…with him…maybe if she did, he'd stop teasing her! And if that didn't work, she could always beat the living daylights out of him…how fun that would be…bwah-hah hah hah.
"So, itachi, are you going to show me around this place, or what? I don't have all day, you know."
The ninja twitched at the sound of Saito's voice and turned her head up to glare at him. Grr…does he have to be so freakin' tall? "…Yeah, okay, I'll give you the damned tour. But it's only 'cause Kondo-san asked me to. It's not like I would care if you got lost in here." She informed him with forced politeness, giving the wolf a sweet little smile in the process.
Saito saw the hidden rage in that smile, and was unable to stop a smirk of his own from forming. "Lead the way, weasel," he commanded amiably, thoroughly enjoying the reddish color her face went a few seconds later. "And be quick about it."
"HEY! STOP ORDERING ME AROUND, YOU…YOU…YOU…" Think, Misao, think!
An eyebrow went up, and Saito's smirk widened. "Hmm?"
Misao sputtered for a few seconds, mentally willing herself to come up with a good retort. Crap! Insult…insult…insult… "…MAN, YOU!"
The eyebrow went higher. "'Man'"? Is that an insult?"
"YEAH! YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SMART, BUT, IN REALITY, YOU'RE JUST A MAN! HA! SO THERE!" The ninja crossed her arms in front of her chest, planted her feet apart, and glowered. Her whole posture positively screamed, "you-say-something-you-bastard-and-you-die!" at him.
It wasn't until a few seconds later that the weasel heard the low, amused snickers emanating from the wolf.
"And what, exactly, is so funny, you…you MAN?"
Misao jerked slightly as Saito doubled over, now full-blown laughing at her.
What the hell is with this baka guy? One minute he's being a huge ass, and the next, he's laughing! Grr…I'll kill 'im, I swear I will…the butcher knife in the kitchen should do nicely… "HEY! SHUT UP, YOU JERK!"
The wolf looked up at the ninja, standing there with her hands on her hips, glaring at him while covered in soba, and did the exact opposite. He laughed harder.
But the itachi had had enough. Her temper was now at the breaking point. "GAH! YOU'RE SO MEAN, YOU BIG…MEANIE!" She marched up to him, fists raised. "I'M GONNA KILL YOOOOOOU!" Misao grabbed at one of the detective's ebony bangs, pulled on it until he stood upright, and socked him as hard as she could in the stomach.
There was a few seconds of silence while a strange wind carrying a lone leaf blew across the pair.
Saito blinked down at the fuming ninja, watching with amusement as her face flared beet-red. Now, to add fuel to the fire… "Was that supposed to hurt, itachi musume?" How long had it been since he'd laughed like that? Too long, it seemed. And this…girl…had been able to cause it? Ah well…best to not dwell on trivial things…
"Er…umm…n-no! Of course it w-wasn't!" Misao told him, trying her best to stifle her rapidly crimsoning face. "I-it was just a warning, s-so ha!" She stuck her tongue out at the detective, not caring that she was acting like a juvenile young kid.
Another smirk graced the wolf's lips. The weasel was so easy to read. "A warning, hmm?" He reached down, and, in the blink of an eye, took hold of one of the girl's wrists. "Then what do you call this?"
A split-second later, Misao found herself in quite a predicament: her right arm was twisted and locked painfully behind her back, caught in an unbreakable hold by Saito! She hadn't even seen him move! How had he gone so fast? Interesting…clearly, he did take martial arts…maybe she could ask him if he would spar with her, later…but, for the moment… "H-hey! When did you-?"
"Just now. And, if you do not let go of my bang, I will be forced to break this wrist of yours." The detective twisted it gently in his grip, silently telling her that he wasn't joking around. …Though, he'd never actually do it…but she didn't need to know that…
The weasel's eyes narrowed, and her stubbornness overcame her sense of physical well-being. "No freakin' way! You let go of me, first, and I might let go, if you ask really nicely!" She gave the bang a few more hard tugs, as if to prove her point.
Saito growled low under his breath. "Itachi." His right hand darted forward and grasped Misao's braid. "Let. Go." Both words were emphasized with pulls on the ninja's hair.
The weasel girl would not give up so easily, though. "Oh yeah? Well, two can play at this game!" She reached backward with her locked wrist until she could feel his chest beneath her palm, and then proceeded to poke her fingernails into him. "Release my braid, or I swear, I will make you bleed!"
Anyone that walked into that room, at that moment, would probably be shocked at the odd-looking position the ookami and the itachi were in. Misao's head was tilted back from the force of the downward pull on her hair, and was resting near the wolf's shoulder. Her back was being pressed into his front, with her arm jammed between them. The weasel's free hand had hold of one of the detective's bangs, and her trapped hand was digging into his chest.
Of course, it was then that Kondo walked into that room, at that moment, and was most definitely shocked at their odd-looking position. In fact, he was shocked into silence! …For a few seconds, anyway… "…HAJIME? MISAO?" The police chief blinked at them, open-mouthed, but then shook himself from his disbelief. "Well…am I interrupting something? Hee hee…should I leave, now?"
Both the weasel and the wolf's heads whipped up, but only Misao's eyes widened.
Saito, on the other hand, mentally cursed his stupid luck. Argh…dammit…Kondo's never going to let me live this down… The "knowing" smirk on his superior's face was enough to confirm that. If only he had stayed away from the cursed itachi! He should have known something like this would happen! Baka Kondo…he has impeccable timing…
Misao, meanwhile, was mortified. Oh…what did the police chief think of her now? Here she was, in a compromising, strange position…with her own bodyguard, no less! Well, it was the stupid man's fault, in the first place…if he hadn't teased her, and then laughed at her, none of this would have happened! I hate this guy…dammit, why couldn't I have gotten a different person to protect me? Saito'll probably just watch as I'm skinned, gutted, and filleted…not only that, but he'd tease me afterwards on how my insides aren't the right color, or something!
At least Aoshi-sama wouldn't have to worry about anything…Misao planned to stay as far away from the baka wolf as she could.
Of course, they'd have to disentangle themselves, first.
She reluctantly released Saito's ebony bang from her grip, and then sighed as the wolf relinquished the hold he had on her poor defenseless wrist. The weasel gently pried her fingers loose from the detective's flesh, wincing slightly when she saw that the tips of her nails were red. Whoops. So she had drawn blood, after all. Ah, well…he deserved it, anyway!
…And why hadn't he let go of her braid, yet?
The wolf gently rolled the silky-soft hair between his fingers, utterly enjoying the "look of death" he was receiving from the weasel, who had turned her head to glare at him with those bright blue-green eyes of hers. Ah, she angered far too quickly…so unlike…her…so unlike Tokio…
…Tokio…
Murderer…murderer…you killed her, and you don't deserve to even have memories of her beauty…
Saito let the braid fall free from his now nerveless fingers, desperately trying to block that nasty little voice from whispering the horrible, unforgiving truth in his ear…
It took him a moment to realize that Kondo was talking, and was snapped out of his reverie immediately.
"So…you two…" Enter the eyebrow wiggling here. "…Well, I take it you had fun?" A huge, pleased grin spread across the police chief's face when he saw the glare that the wolf was sending his way.
Misao crossed her arms in front of her chest, silently berating herself for losing her cool around the detective. How could one man get her so riled up? Normally, she could keep her temper fairly in check, but he…he had made her snap with a few simple words! And she couldn't believe that Kondo would even think that they were…doing that… Of course…maybe they had looked a bit…suspicious…but…sheesh!
The police chief was quite happy with himself. It seemed that Hajime and Misao were getting along fairly well…at least she hadn't tried to kill the wolf, yet! And Hajime will grow on her in time, I'm sure…once she gets to know him, and his teasing doesn't bother her so much…
"Sir…fun? Did that actually look like we were having…fun?" Saito growled low in his throat, allowing some of his pent-up anger to be released. Damn Kondo! Must he always assume such ridiculous things?
"Well, my boy, it did look like you were enjoying yourself…" The police chief began.
Misao decided to break in. "Yeah, he was. Enjoying tormenting me, that is!"
"Hn…baka itachi…"
"HEY! I TOLD YOU TO STOP CALLING ME THAT! MY NAME IS MISAO, DAMMIT! NOT ITACHI, OR WEASEL, OR GIRL…IT'S MISAO!"
Kondo couldn't help but sweat drop when he noticed that this argument was the same thing they had been fighting about right before he left…
The wolf rolled his eyes at the noodle-covered woman, finally becoming impatient. "Look, weasel –"
"IT'S MISAO! DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU, BAKA? M. I. S. A. O! MISAO, DAMMIT, MISAO!"
"Okay, fine."
The ninja abruptly stopped her ranting at those two little words. "Wh-wha'?" She was stunned…had Saito just agreed to stop teasing her? Was the world going to end? Was an apocalypse coming? Were all of the seas, lakes, and rivers in the world going to dry up? Was everything going to just…die?
"You heard me. Fine. I'll call you…Misao…"
The way he said her name still made it sound like he was insulting her. Accursed man…
"…but you still look like a weasel."
She blinked. Blink, blink…blink, blink…
Kondo hurriedly threw himself between the detective and the ninja, frantic to stop another fight from forming. "AHEM…so, you two…how was the tour?" An abrupt change of subject should help…
The ookami and the itachi both looked at the police chief, confused. Then, at the same time…
"'Tour'? What 'tour'?"
"'Tour', sir?"
Kondo groaned and placed his head in his hands. So hopeless…the both of them… "Oh, nothing…forget I said anything…but, Hajime, we should probably leave. You're going to have to pack up your stuff to get ready for tomorrow, when you move in."
Personally, Misao was quite happy to hear that. At least she had one last night to herself before this…jerk…came to live with her…
"Yes, sir, you're right. See you later, itachi," Saito pulled his leather jacket on and walked towards the front door, stopping only long enough to wave vaguely over his shoulder at the ninja. "Do me one favor, though, Misao...take a shower. You smell like soba." Then…he was gone.
The police chief grinned nervously at Misao, for the girl was starting to turn a violent crimson-color… "Umm…heh heh…goodbye, Misao-san! Just…one last thing…don't let him get to you so much. He really doesn't mean half the things he says." Steam started to pour from her ears. "Eh, bye!"
The weasel was alone now, and she was glad for it. That didn't make her any less pissed off, though. She plucked a stray noodle from her hair and threw it to the floor in fury. Damn that man! He was going to be the death of her! Well…revenge was always sweet…ah-hah hah hah…yes…revenge…
She'd get Saito back, and he'd regret the day he ever met Makimachi Misao, payback-expert extraordinaire!
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Jasmine: I hope the length makes up for the lateness...Eh-heh heh…well, 'till next time, loyal reviewers, this is Jasmine Reinier, signing off!
"People only have hope…because they cannot see Death standing behind them…"
Japanese Words:
Baka: Stupid/Idiot
Itachi: Weasel
Musume: Girl
Ookami: Wolf
Hajime: Begin
Soba: Those noodle-like things that Saito loves…you know what I'm talking about.