Other than that i hope everyone is liking it so far. Again please tell me or i'll just quit.
"Why didn't you save me?" She screamed into his chest pounding with her hands. "Why didn't you help me?"
She was so drunk she didn't realize what she was telling him so he just listened on the verge of breaking down. He hadn't wanted to understand why one moment of kindness caused him so much trouble.
He understood now though, he'd fallen for her. He'd fallen hard too and he didn't care. He'd nearly died that day and she was the only person who'd given him a sincere answer. she didn't want him to die and she'd been glad he'd survived.
He didn't deserve that light brush of her hand.
She didn't deserve this.
"I called for you, why? why didn't you come for me? You could have saved me. I wanted to be yours." She was screaming it now. He was shocked at what she was saying. she was pouring her broken heart out to him. Admitting her deepest secrets and she was angry.
"I hate you, i swear i hate you."
"I know, it's ok hate me." He whispered trembling. He'd never cried over a girl he liked before the only woman he'd ever cried over was his mother but he was close to crying for Hermione. She was drunk and in pain and she was asking why he didn't save her?
"No, no, no i hate you, i hate you so much you bastard why couldn't you let me in sooner? Why couldn't you just get over your racist idiotic ways and just fall in love with me. You could've had me. You would have always had me you asshole. I hate you."
"Hate me please." He begged. The ice cold tears started falling down his angelic face. She kept pounding at his chest furiously. Her anger and her pain were intoxicating torture because it hurt him and thrilled him at the same time. She loved him and that put him on a high but the same thing killed him because she was right why hadn't he let go sooner?
"I'm an idiot ok. I love you." He said running his hands through her hair. "I really do i'm just a prat with no sense."
"You should have saved me." She sobbed. She stopped pounding at his chest and fell to the ground he fell right with her. All his pride, self righteousness and arrogance went out the window. He wasn't lying. In the back of his mind he'd always been envious of her. He'd always wanted to have what she had and being a Malfoy he wanted her, he'd just been so daft back then so young and stupid that he'd confused the signals.
He'd listened to his idiot father about muggles so much that when a witch yes a witch with the potential to be the best was in front of him he blinded himself to her.
"I'm sorry." He sobbed into her hair, it was a masculine sob with all his pain all his anger and rage.
"I want to die Draco." She whispered. "I just want to die, no one will ever want me and no you don't love me."
He looked at her grabbing her shoulders. "I do love you, i want you. I've always wanted you. You're beautiful and smart and courageous and witty, sensual and the most amazing woman in this whole god damn world i want the best, you are the best. You're the woman i want to be with, have children with. Can't you just accept that i'm a sodding moron. I should have saved you yes i should have killed them. Ripped them into shreds and tortured them to the point that even voldermort would say enough but i didn't and i'm sorry. I'm so sorry that i couldn't save you. You can't die because i need you. You challenge me and you push me you always have just by being you and i can't be without you in this or any world."
She looked up at him her eyes hazed over from crying. "Then why did you hurt me?"
"Because i listened to my family and not to my heart. Because i'm fucking human Hermione and i make mistakes, a six year mistake. I looked at you for what you were not who you were."
"How can you even look at me i feel so dirty, i can't wipe them off me." She said leaning into his chest. She was still drunk but was sober enough to understand and listen but she was so very tired.
"I only see you." He said simply. "You're not dirty and i promise i'll get them and you won't ever have to be afraid again."
It suprised them both how easy it felt to just be there, to forget everything they'd ever said and done to each other but when your soul dies and you come back as half a person the past and all it's errors mean nothing. Especially when the person you care about pushes the brink.
She felt horrible all of a sudden her stomach was pushing the acohol out of her body, something she had become more than used to but thsi time it was worse.
"I'm going to be sick." She said and just about crawled to the bathroom with Draco following behind.
her hands found their way to the edge of the toilet seat and she let it out. She'd been throwing up ever since the hospital. No she was not pregnant she'd more than once checked but she knew why.
She'd started drinking a month after the incident. She'd gone into the mud room her father kept for company and took a bottle of burbon from the back. It hadn't even been opened she knew her parents didn't like it. It had been a gift and they'd just left it in the back of the liquor cabinete.
She'd locked herself in her room while her parents slept and had taken large gulps of it. It had been horrible at first but then the taste had become more tolerable.
She'd drank almost the whole bottle until she'd run into the bathroom throwing it all up.
Draco held her hair back as she threw up. He just stood there waiting for her to let it all out. His free hand soothing her back as he convulsed.
After she was done he grabbed a towel and wiped her mouth neither said anything for a moment but then he started unbuttoning her shirt she looked up at him confused and with a look of fear he noticed it.
"Trust me." He said and she nodded looking down he finished unbuttoning her shirt and pulled it off, there was no lust in his eyes there was love and concern though.
He looked down at the place Hermione hated the most. Her breast that was marked. It was still as clear as day. She couldn't understand why it wouldn't go away she'd tried everything magical to get rid of it.
"I'm marked." She whsiplered at it looking ashamed.
Draco shook his head. "No, you're not marked. I promise you."
"But." He started but he hushed her. He took off her bra slowly and touched the mark lovingly. If you looked past what it represented it was beautiful. It was detailed and he imagined how much it would have hurt her. Dragon damn it why had it been a dragon.
He finished undressing her and she stood there naked in front of him but she wouldn't look him in the eyes. He tilted her head up and pressed his lips against hers softly. she welcomed the gentle touch and felt him take his own clothes off. She didn't understand what he was doing and he knew it.
He wasn't going to explain though he was just going to do.
He stood in front of her now his chest marked like hers. The memory of what her own friend had done to him bubbled up in her mind and she felt a feeling of reasurance in her mind. He understood some of her pain.
He turned the water on in theri bathroom and sat ont he edge of the tub. He pulled her close touching her skin gently. There was no sexual vibe coming from him. she flet reasured and safe without him saying a word, he just wanted to feel her not what she could offer.
Whent he water was ready he urged her to get in, again she was confused but when he got behind her she just went with it. She was a little self concious as she slowly sobered up.
why would he want to be near her let alone naked in a tub with her after what he knew.
He grabbed the soap and her wash cloth and started lathering her down. He was gentle and took note of every scar. for the first time since the horrible moment in her life she started to feel the dirt wash away.
She laid back against his chest and he continued to wash her, they didn't speak and not once did either try to make a move on each other. That wasn't what thsi was about, thsi was about errasing the past letting it go in a way that it could never come back to haunt them.
they sat there for ever jsut enjoying the warmth they felt. He had so much he wanted to say to her but he didn't, this wasn't tihe time. She suddenly looked down at his forearm and noticed the thing that should have scared him.
"did it hurt?" she asked calmly.
"What do you mean?"
"When he marked you did it hurt you?"
"Yes." He said simply, she rached for his arm and traced the dark mark with her finger. She looked down at her own mark and then turned to look at him.
"Mine too." She whispered. "Now we're both marked by someone we hate."
He wanted to tell her again that she wasn't marked but he realized that she was right. He hated Voldermort for so many different reasons. She hated him for what he'd done to her,
She hated the man who raped her for taking away her choice. He'd taken away her right to be with someone, the man she wanted to be with. Him.
"Yeah he said quietly. He held her close feeling her smooth skin against his chest. It was a moment they'd both wanted but hadn't thought was ever possible. Draco had just thought he'd leave and never see her again, never get a chance with her and end up marrying some pure blood woman, have children and serve the dark load until the day he died.
Just like his father and grandfather had before him.
Hermione had thought she'd end up married to Ron or someone like that, join the ministry and have children. She would have had to accept to never see Draco again or worse, kill him.
The warth started to escape the water along with the bubbles. Draco wrapped his arms around her waist and with one sleek movement lifted them both up.
She blushed slightly because now as she stood there sober and naked she took a good look at him.
He smirked at her. "She something you like?"
She blushed even harder and he started laughing grabbing a towel and covering himself up. He grabbed another fluffy towel and wrapped it around her kissing her gently on the lips.
'Merlin i love his kisses.' she thought.
He lead her into her bed room and gave her one last kiss before going to his own room. She sighed, she was sober now and all the emotions she'd let out in the last few hours had finally sunk in.
She walked around her room and got dressed, she didn't know if he was going to come back but she didn't have to wonder for long.
After she was finished she heard her door open slowly. He came in wearing a pair of boxer shorts and a button up shirt. His hair was slightly damp and hung loosley off his face.
They didn't say anything, there was no need to say a word. They both knew where they stood and they both knew that it would be ok from now on. The question was what now?
"I'm staying with you tonight." He said in a matter a fact voice. "Got a problem with that?"
She smiled at his Malfoy mannor and shook her head, he lead her over to the bed. It was very dark now an dher clock read 12:25
She was amazed at how easy it was to follow him. She wondered if this was the way all the girls felt around him.
He puled her close to him after they were in bed. "What will we tell everyone?"
She whispered. He shrugged his shoulders and kissed her forehead. "Why don't we just not say anything."
"Won't that be strange though?"
"I don't think it's a good idea for us to publicly be affectionete. He looked down at his forearm. " I don't want anything to happen to you because of me."
She thought about it, He was right, they both had things in theri way. She nodded her head and suddenly felt very tired.
"Will you be here when i wake up?" She whispered.
"I promise." He said closing his eyes.
A/N I hope you like it. This was an emotional one to write.
Anyway please review please. I would really appreciate it.