A/N - Woah, 11 reviews? I asked for two but I am definitely not complaining. Anything but, actually! Thanks so much..I hope you like the actual first chapter better. Okay..this is another short one, but not as short. The next chapter is longer, though. Please review? And thanks SO much for the support so far!
Disclaimer - I don't own Instant Star
Chapter 1 - Maybe, Just maybe.
I walk into G-major with my large hoodie on, hiding my shirt I had worn to bed the previous night. Yes I went to shool like this, but I just don't care anymore.
"Jude." Darius greets me with a weak smile.
"How's my favorite Instant star doing?" He asks. I can tell he's trying his hardest to be patient with me, and I really do appreciate him for that.
"I'm alright," I lie. What am I suppose to say? I'm going out of my mind? Ha. No.
"Good. Kwest is in studio C." He says, gesturing towards the studio. I smile up at him and nod, walking away. Kwest was pretty easy to handle. He knew how much Tommy meant to me..He also knew that I needed time. How much time? Who knows? Can you seriously put a time limit on something like this? No way. Healing was a long and depressing process. I wish I didn't have to go through it. But leave it to Quincy to leave a girl heart broken.
"Hey Jude." He says as I walk in. I smile and return the greeting.
"Got any lyrics for me?" He asks, hopefully. I just shake my head and pull out a notebook and pen from my backpack.
"I'm just..not up to writing." I say, looking up at him. He nods in understanding. "Well, let's take a look at some of your old writing, maybe we could find something there?" He asks, oblivious to the fact that that girl was long gone. I couldn't sing one of those songs and pretend to be happy. I was sick of pretending. "I don't think so." I say, weakly.
"Well..we could always see about getting a songwriter to write your songs." He said, knowing I couldn't handle that. I narrowed my eyes.
"There's no way." I say. He smiles and shakes his head.
"Then let's get to work." He urges, gesturing towards the notebook. I breathe in deeply and nod. Today I was going to come up with something no matter how hard it was for me. I was going to write. But, I was definitely not going to write about him. I couldn't give him the satisfaction.
Kwest and I worked a few hours trying to get the lyrics right. It took atleast an hour just to come up with the hook. Thank god Kwest was patient too.
"Jude, I'm liking this." He said, reading over the lyrics.
"Yeah?" I say, smiling a bit wider than usual. Maybe..just maybe I can get over Quincy. Maybe I can move on.
After we made a few minor adjustments Kwest proudly took the song to Darius and let him read over the lyrics. God, they were acting like it was a masterpeice or something. Darius liked it and sent me into the recording room imediately. I really didn't feel like singing. Nope, they wouldn't take that as an excuse anymore. Oh boy, what have I gotten myself into?
Kwest spoke into the intercom, telling me which mic to use. I did as instructed and fixed it in front of me. For once, I was actually shaking. I didn't know why..was I nervous? I never get nervous. There was no music..I was just singing this raw and full of emotion. No sound to back me up. If I messed this up..better yet WHEN I messed this up..everyone would hear my flaws. Everyone being Kwest, but still.
He smiled assuringly at me and that was my cue to start. I took a huge breath and let my emotions go, tears stinging my eyes and threatening to fall.
"My heart's beating fast, I can't relax
To this day I'm drained, When I hear your name
Ok so it was about him..I can't help but write about him.
Just let me go, Drop the hold
Release me from the pain.
My heart's beating fast, I can't relax
Driven to the limit, I hide alone
You captivate, I can't escape
Though these tears I cry, and lonely nights
You told me you'd never leave me
Only to turn around and deceive me
Living regret, I'm bound by walls
To this day, you're my only flaw.
My heart's beating fast, I can't relax
Emptiness devours me
Just so ya know, I can't let go
I loved you more than you'll ever know
You told me you'd never leave me
Just to turn around and deceive me
Living regret, bound by walls
To this day you're my only flaw.
Bound by walls, I stay inside
Never fear these tears I cry
You're the one who left it all
You're the one who let me fall.."
I stopped singing and looked up, wiping away a few tears that had managed to escape. Kwest and Darius were gaping at me. Darius was smiling and Kwest had a look of sympathy on his face. The only one to say anything was the infamous Darius himself.
"My girls back." He said, smiling widely.
"My girls back." He repeated.
A/N - I really hate notepad. It's not like wordpad..I liked wordpad. It was so much easier to upload. (Sigh) Well anywho. What did you guys think? Hope the chapter didn't suck..Please review:)