Spring Showers

Chapter Nine: Asleep and Awake

"He's going to be okay." Penny told the others. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, especially RJ and Verne. "He's just sleeping right now.

"It looks like the little guy has the chills." Stella added, coming out of the log with Penny. "Let's just hope he doesn't catch a cold."

"I don't think he will, but just in case, when he wakes up, we should feed him some warm chicken noodle soup." Penny recommended.

"Good idea, honey." Lou agreed, remembering how effective the stuff was when the triplets came down with a cold a while ago.

"We should just let him rest in the meantime." Stella added. "Tiger and I will look for the chicken soup and start heating it up just in case he wakes up soon."

"Thanks Stella." Verne expressed his gratitude for her help.

"What's been up with Hammy?" Ozzie asked Verne and RJ. "He's been acting odd for the past few days. Is something bothering him?"

"It's…" RJ started to explain, but Verne placed his arm in his shoulder.

"It's nothing. He's just been having a really bad week, that's all." Verne took over the conversation. "I'll go talk to him when he wakes up and feels up to it." Verne assured all of them.

"Well, if there is anything we can do to help, just tell us." Ozzie reminded him.

"I'm sure I can handle it." Verne replied.

"Okay then." Ozzie said as he and the rest of the hedgies left the two of them.

"I'm going to keep an eye on Hammy." Verne told him. "What are you going to do?" Verne asked with a serious tone.

"I… I just need to think about some things." RJ answered.

"Go easy on him okay." Verne added, understanding what RJ had to think about, giving him the space that he needed.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah." RJ nodded before walking off, away from Verne. Once a good distance away from anyone, he let out a long, deep sigh. "Damn." He cursed.

He never liked to verbalize his frustrations with vulgar words, but just this once, he thought, the current situation allowed him to be a little crude. The situation itself was out of the ordinary, to say the least. "Damned if you do, damned if you don't." RJ continued to curse under his breath, going over the situation at hand in his head.

He and Verne had run as fast as they could back to the log to help treat Hammy. His heart nearly stopped when Hammy began to shake in his arms, fearing the worse. He picked up speed, running even faster than he could imagine, nearly leaving Verne in his dust. He couldn't imagine what would it be like if Hammy… no, he had to stop thinking about that possibility. Hammy had to get well. He'd do anything to make sure he was okay. He had to get him help.

Even when arriving back at home, when the others saw Hammy and took over taking care of him, he couldn't stop his own body from shaking. For those few hours, he couldn't stand still and mentally, he berated himself for Hammy's condition. More than once, he was ready to break out crying but he maintained his stoic appearance. His mind was in turmoil, thinking of what could happen, from the best case to the worse case scenario, dreading the worse. He found no peace until finally Penny and Stella had told him of Hammy's condition, learning that his best friend was not in danger anymore.

He walked around the general area that the family members had reserved for themselves for a bit of their personal time. In truth, they were just clearings that the family members had picked out due to some random preference or another. However, in each clearing, everyone kept their own little possessions, things from long ago or from more recent time, running the gamut from small trinkets to high-tech entertainment systems. Of course, each little thing had special meaning or purpose.

Ozzie had a small wooden heart that reminded him of his late wife, a gift that he had given to her after she had accepted his proposal to be his mate, along with other mementos, mementos that he would share the story behind each of them to Heather. Bucky, Quillo, and Spike had in their little area a huge stereo system which they would often turn on and dance to the latest pop singles from different artists or another. Nearby, Lou and Penny kept a small digital camera, along with the many photos that they had taken of the family, printed from the laser printer that Stella had, editing with the laptop computer she also possessed, something she personally used to check up on the latest news (and the occasional fashion tip or two) or help the others do some info gathering from the various sites or forums for some reason or another.

She kept the parental filter on just in case any of them might want to search out some of the racier stuff, which horrified her the first and last time she stumbled upon it.

RJ curled his lips into a smile. Every object that any one of the Hedgies possessed bound the family closer together. Every item had some personal significance to the bearer, but it also allowed the family to be a part of it. Family was everything to them. Family was everything to him.

"EW!" RJ groaned, disgusted at stepping into some weird, brown substance. He wiped his foot over the grass trying to take off as much of the stuff from his toes. There seemed to be something odd about the brown, mushy stuff. It didn't smell like what he thought it may have been. And did he see. "Chocolate chunks?"

He didn't dare to try to determine whether or not the stuff really was chocolate or not, just following his instinct that it was. He came to realize that he had stepped in the remains of a crumbled, old chocolate chip cookie.

"What the?" RJ could only think of one family member who he could tie to with the cookie. "Hammy? What was he doing here?" RJ was puzzled. Why would there be the remains of a cookie when he knew that Hammy basically stuffed each and every piece into his mouth? He looked around the area and came upon a small opening in the bush next to the cookie remains. He peered through the hole to find that he was gazing right into Heather's area. "Why would there be…" Then he realized. "DAMN!" RJ screamed out.

No wonder why Hammy was in bad shape today. He must have seen him and Heather dancing around last night! And, figuring Hammy's feelings, he could only conclude one thing: Hammy was jealous.

RJ growled to himself, furious of the feelings that were now coursing through him. Why did Hammy go out and beat himself up for this? Why did Hammy have to go and drink that alcohol and start all of this?

Why, most of all, did Hammy have to have feelings for him?

Then it hit him. He thought about all the things that Hammy had kept, his personal mementos that meant the world to him. The nacho chip bag that he had when he first met the Hedgies. The canisters of various nuts that they had collected over the course of the past year. The stickers of the various chocolate candy treats he had given to Hammy after he found them in a cereal box. The picture of the two of them munching on a chocolate chip cookie slice from a cookie cake they had taken from a birthday party.

RJ unclenched his fists and lowered his head. He should have seen it coming.

Hammy, young and impressionable as he was, had fallen in love with him. Not that he deserved such feelings from the squirrel; he just didn't know what to make of the whole thing. He couldn't blame Hammy for the feelings he had for him, realizing that the young squirrel could barely understand them himself. But the damage was done. He'd have to have a long, much-needed talk with Hammy. And he expected a lot of crying and harsh words. But Hammy deserved to know, even if it would hurt him. It would be the first step of many Hammy would have to take to recover and pick up the pieces.

RJ understood, having been down that road before.

With a deep, shaky sigh, he picked himself up and started to walk back to his pad. It was almost nighttime and his head ached and he didn't want to think anymore tonight. He'd plop himself down in front of the television, allowing the tube to lull him to sleep. Tomorrow, he'll hash out the dialogue of the talk that he would have with Hammy when he got better.

He hoped that it would be easy enough to 'breakup' with Hammy. There was nothing really to "break up" except some meaningless, obsessive crush. But he knew the truth. It wasn't going to be easy.

After all, breaking up was never easy.

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Hammy shifted his weight, feeling a cool breeze hitting him from behind. He curled his tail a bit to shield his body and keep himself warm.

"Hey there, Hamsquad."

Hammy opened his eyes and smiled, gazing lovingly at the face above him.

"Hey RJ." Hammy giggled, feeling his arms around him. RJ leaned down and gave him a kiss on his head. Just as he pulled back, Hammy extended his hand out and pulled RJ back down gently, this time planting a somewhat awkward, but passionate kiss on his lips. RJ moaned softly with the kiss.

"How was your sleep?" RJ asked, pulling back slightly with a smile on his face.

"It was good." Hammy yawned, RJ chuckled at the sight of him yawning.

"You're so cute, you know that?" RJ told him.

"You too, RJ." Hammy giggled once more. "You too."

"Thanks." RJ replied, smiling down on him.

"It's so good to wake up and see you." Hammy said. "How long were you up?"

"Not long." RJ stroked Hammy's fur gently. "Just stayed here to watch you wake up." Hammy cooed softly. He shifted his position in RJ's arms until he lay face to face with RJ. "Thought I shouldn't wake you up, especially considering how tired you were after last night."

"It's okay." Hammy smiled and took a deep breath of RJ's scent. "I don't care when or where I wake up so long as I wake up next to you."

"I love ya, Hammy." RJ hugged him tight. "So much." He added.

"Love you too, RJ." Hammy looked up to RJ. He leaned up, closing his eyes, to give his mate another loving kiss.

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"Mmmph." Hammy shifted himself, trying to make himself comfortable on the soft surface. He moved directly under a stream of light, forcing him to abruptly change position once more and open his eyes. "Hmm." Picking himself up, Hammy moved his hand over his other arm and pinched himself. "Ouch." Hammy reacted.

He plopped back down to the soft surface he had been lying on, which he quickly discovered was neither grass nor raccoon fur. He pushed down on the stuff and realized he had been laying on the weird, memory foam stuff that the family had inside of the log. A quick look at his surroundings confirmed it for him.

"Hmmph." Hammy sighed. "Only another dream." He had already resolved that it would be foolish to chase after the dream, to make it a reality. However, it still didn't keep him from dreaming.

Truth be told, it was his dreams that got him to start having a crush on RJ. In one form or another, his dreams would consist of passionate kissing, heartfelt, comforting hugs, romantic whispers and small talk, and gently tumbling around each other on soft grass. Thinking about his dreams, he never really did understand anything about it. Maybe there was something more to the dreams that he couldn't grasp. He used to take them at face value, just swimming in the warm, tingly feelings he would get after waking up from them. He developed the habit of pinching himself to remind himself what was real or not, realizing he never felt pain in those dreams. Nightmares, yes, but never his dreams. Then, a few days ago, he just regretted having them when he woke up after them. They were a painful reminder of things he would never have.

But now, he just looked at the dreams as if they were just any other dream. They were only meant to be dreamt and nothing more. They were his last bastion of his feelings that he kept away, locked in some corner of his mind and heart. It was to be a dream unfulfilled. He sighed.

"Morning Hammy!" A cheery voice greeted him.

"Oh. Hi, Heather." Hammy replied simply, looking up to see her enter the log.

"How was your sleep?" She asked.

"It was good." Hammy replied simply once more.

"You really had us worried last night." Heather said, sitting at the edge of the small bed Hammy lay on. "You were shaking a lot and we hoped that you would be okay by this morning."

"Oh." Hammy replied. "Sorry for making everyone worry about me."

"Hey Hammy, you hungry little guy?" Ozzie came into the log.

"Yeah, but I'll get some food for myself." Hammy said simply. He picked himself up slowly, steadying himself on the side of the log, and calmly walked outside.

"Was it something I said?" Ozzie asked his daughter, wondering why Hammy acted the way he did as he walked out on them.

"Hey Hammy, you're alright!" Quillo, Bucky, and Spike greeted him outside of the log.

"Hey guys." Hammy looked to the three.

"Do want us to get you something to eat?" They asked.

"No, it's okay. I can go get some for myself." Hammy repeated his words. As soon as he finished talking, he walked off from the others a bit before starting to run at a brisk speed. The triplets wondered what was with Hammy. He didn't seem to be acting like he normally would.

He ran until he came to one of the spots in the small forest that he was very familiar with. A lot of trees and bushes, the soil soft and easy to dig through, it was the first place he would go to for him to hide the nuts he collected over the course of the year. He decided than rather eating the usual food stuff at the log, he wanted to eat some good, old-fashioned nuts.

He moved to one of his favorite spots to bury nuts and dug down. No matter what other random spots he would bury his other nuts, he never failed to bury some in this particular spot. A few inches under the dirt, he found his stash. He pulled out a nut and easily cracked it open with his teeth. Running his tongue over his teeth, he noticed that they were a bit longer than usual. He would have to make it a point to eat some hard food over the coming days to wear them down. He sat down and started to nibble on the pieces of nut, satisfying his appetite.

He busied himself for a while, eating up the stash of nuts that he had, thinking about nothing. Looking to see he only had a few more nuts left to eat, he caught himself realizing that some considerable time had passed and he…

He felt normal. He felt fine.

Nothing seemed to weigh him down. He thought about the others and felt no noticeable elicitation of emotion for any of them. Thinking of RJ, he just thought of him as another family member, a nice guy, and a fun person to hang around with.

He blinked.

"What in the world happened to me?

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If you have any advice or suggestions, please feel free to review me. All flames will be ignored.

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