Spring Showers

Chapter Fourteen: Awakening

"Damn!" RJ exclaimed, angry at himself, walking alongside of the hedge. When he got to Lou and Penny, he had learned that Hammy had just left, the squirrel leaving to do whatever work he did in the forest area, most likely taking care of his store of nuts. To try and find him now in all the shrubbery was a daunting task and RJ was slowly loosing his spirit, not to mention his energy, to find him, thinking of opting to wait for him to come back to the rest of the family.

However, he was motivated, by some unknown force, to continue searching for Hammy, as futile as it may be. So he set off to find him.

"Hammy!" RJ called out to him, holding out the hope that Hammy would hear him and respond, as unlikely as it was. He had already traveled some distance away from the log, having walked for more than two, maybe three hours. He looked up and noted the position of the sun. It was already late in the afternoon. "Maybe." He considered an idea.

He decided to make his way from the hedge and into the forest area, wanting to take a chance and somehow, unlikely as it seemed, to see if he could find one of Hammy's nut hiding places. Maybe, just maybe he might be able to find him.

"Hammy!" He called out again. He looked around the area, hoping to see if he could find some sign of Hammy. A flattened path of grass, open holes in the ground, pieces of nut scattered on the floor, any sign to show that Hammy was nearby.

"Yes!" RJ rushed over to an exposed pile of dirt adjacent to a hole dug deeply into the ground next to a bush. He examined it carefully, checking for any sign of activity. He picked up a piece of the brown shell of an acorn, noting the marks gouged into the shell piece. And he could feel on the shell something wet...

"He was just here!" RJ realized. "He must be somewhere nearby!" He told himself. He was about to leave the hole until an idea entered his thought. He turned back to the hole and dug down a little further. He wasn't totally surprised when he found another acorn in the ground, but he still felt a sense of relief finding one.

"Where are you, Hammy?" With the acorn under his arm, he looked around the area once more, hoping to find another sign of Hammy, but no luck. Still, he decided to keep on moving, walking in another direction. He really didn't know why he was headed in this particular direction; he just had a feeling, an instinct, if you could call it that, something that told him to head that direction.

"Hammy, here I come." RJ was determined to find him. Within himself, he complied with whatever force was driving him to find Hammy, trusting that it would not guide him wrong, that he will find him.

He could care less what force it was. He just wanted Hammy.

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"This feels nice." Hammy cooed, just basking in the warm glow of the sun above him and relishing the warmth that surrounded him.

"You like that, don't you?" RJ chuckled, rubbing his fingers gently over Hammy's sensitive sides.

"RJ, that tickles." Hammy feebly fought back, rather enjoying the feeling of RJ's fingers moving all over his body. "Don't stop." Hammy gasped out.

"And what if I do?" RJ asked playfully.

"Then I'll do this." Hammy reached his hand out to RJ, grasping RJ and pulling him down to meet him.

"Oh." RJ gasped, opening his mouth and taking Hammy's mouth into his own.

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"Mmph… Ummph…" Hammy moaned softly, turning and twisting on the fallen branch he was asleep on, moving as he really would in his dream. RJ had to move quickly to catch Hammy, to keep him from falling off of it. As he landed against RJ, he brought himself out of his dream.

"Hey Hammy." RJ smiled as he watched Hammy open his eyes and stir from his slumber. The little guy looked like he really was enjoying himself, a big smile on his face and soft giggles coming from him evidence of that.

"Yeah, RJ?" Hammy blinked, looking a little confused for some reason. He was almost sure that RJ was just beneath him, his hands still around him, instead of holding him up, like was doing now.

But who cared? He surely didn't. It was his dream, so almost anything can happen. And most of all, he was with RJ. That was all that really mattered to him in his dreams. To hell with the world. Damn everything else. Just to be with him, to be with RJ. That was all he really wanted.

"You enjoy your sleep, Hammy?" RJ looked to him quizzically, wondering why Hammy seemed to be acting so differently now than he had been the past few days.

"Yeah, RJ, I did." Hammy replied dreamily, giggling ever so slightly. "Where did you go?" He asked, wondering why everything was so different coming out of his supposed nap.

"I had to take care of something." RJ helped Hammy back onto the fallen branch before he looked away from him, rolling the acorn he carried with him in his hands. Then he remembered why he had brought the acorn with him in the first place. "Oh, hey Hammy, this is for you." He handed the acorn to Hammy, who smiled widely, noting the odd, somewhat lost look in Hammy's eyes.

"Thanks, RJ." Hammy giggled coyly, surprising RJ, who couldn't help but chuckle himself. He watched as Hammy admired the acorn in his hands, moving his hands gently over it, coddling as if it were some precious treasure.

"Go on, eat it already." RJ chuckled. Hammy seemed to snap out of his examination of the acorn, noting RJ's words. He smiled and, opening his mouth, he bit down on the acorn.

CRACK! went the outer shell of the acorn, shattering into pieces, leaving only the meat of the nut in his hands.

"How does it taste?" RJ asked, watching Hammy stuff a piece of the meat into his mouth.

"Tastes great!" Hammy smiled lopsidedly, one of his cheeks swollen, filled with the meat of the nut he was trying to chew into pieces. RJ nearly collapsed to the ground, laughing his head off at the comical sight before him.

"That's good." RJ chuckled, trying to work out the rest of his laughter slowly. "That's good." RJ repeated, sighing, just admiring the look on Hammy's face, one of pure happiness and contentment. Did that nut really do all that? He wondered.

"So RJ, what did you do?" Hammy brought up the topic once more of RJ's actions while he slept.

"I had a talk with Heather." RJ started to explain. "Last night, she told me about her feelings for me." He admitted to Hammy. "She even kissed me."

"Huh?" Hammy stopped mid-chew, surprised to hear RJ bringing up Heather, of all of the places in his dream, most of all talking about a romantic encounter with said opossum. "What are you talking about?" Hammy gulped down the rest of the nut in his mouth, wanting to hear RJ clearly, beginning to fret over the news that was now settling into his mind.

"But I had told her that I wasn't attracted to her." RJ felt a bit of remorse for turning Heather down, but felt some sort of assurance, knowing that she harbored no hard feelings against him.

Or against the emotions that he was experiencing now with Hammy.

"Really?" Hammy was now more curious than upset at RJ's admission.

"Yeah." RJ turned back to Hammy, slowly curling his mouth into a smile.

"Why?" Hammy asked, watching as RJ moved up to him, settling himself next to him on the fallen branch. RJ continued to smile gently at Hammy. Hammy couldn't help but smile back to him, the feeling of happiness creeping up again, slowly figuring out RJ smile to him, his answer to his question. "Because of me?" He asked, sighing ever so lightly at the romantic thought.

"Hey Hammy?" RJ asked, moving closer to him, placing his hand on his.

"Yeah?" Hammy replied softly, his face suddenly feeling warmer than usual. His heart began to race as soon as RJ took his hand and held it firmly. "Yeah, RJ?"

"Hammy, can you answer something for me?" RJ asked gently, a small smile curling on his face.

"Yeah." Hammy felt a little giddy, the closeness to RJ making him feel shyer and much more reserved. He took a chance and placed his other hand on RJ's free hand, testing to see how RJ would react to the intimate action. His heart leapt as RJ not only readily took his hand gently into his, but brought together both of their hands, RJ now cupping Hammy's hands within his own. "Yeah, RJ?" Hammy asked dreamily.

"Do you really think the stripes on my face make me look mysterious?" RJ leaned closer to Hammy, the distance between them barely a breath away. Hammy felt a shiver run down his spine, RJ's words dancing in his head, and his breath, the warm air that escaped from his lips, seeming to add to the heat that seemed to be spreading through his body following the shiver.

"Y… Yeah." Hammy barely breathed out, nodding as if to affirm his answer if RJ could not hear his soft response.

"And handsome?" RJ added, bridging the remaining distance between them, the tips of their noses touching, feeling each other's breaths, now hot with fervent energy.

"Yes." Hammy answered before, closing his eyes and tilting his head ever so slightly, he pressed forward and captured RJ's lips with his. He gently slipped his lips over his for the few seconds of the kiss, tasting RJ's lips, relishing the feeling. He pulled back a little and opened his eyes, catching RJ opening his eyes after him.

They looked to each other for a second, reading what was in the other's eyes to see what the other wanted to happen next. RJ's azure eyes to Hammy's emerald eyes, they reflected only the shared desire to feel and to express more to the other.

They had to have one another.

RJ took the initiative this time, pushing forward, pressing his lips on Hammy's gently with enough force to open Hammy's mouth and take a taste. Hammy swooned, feeling in the kiss the desire RJ had for him. He opened his mouth, allowing RJ entrance into his mouth, and RJ, grateful for the admission, tasted Hammy all he could. Hammy squeaked, feeling himself weakening, surrendering to RJ's advances.

RJ let go of Hammy's hands and wrapped his around Hammy's small, lithe body, pulling his closer to him, deepening their kiss. Hammy hesitated for only a second before he opened his hands and placed them on RJ's chest. Feeling RJ's hands stroke his back gently, massaging from his neck down to the small of his back, running his hands over the curves of his body, Hammy felt obligated to do the same for him. Hammy cooed, enjoying the feeling of his fingers running through RJ's soft white fur, pressing against the toned muscle beneath, rousing in him deeper, more passionate feelings.

"RJ." Hammy pulled away, desperately trying to catch his breath quickly in order to resume kissing RJ once more. Hammy kept his hands on RJ's chest, feeling his lover's chest rise and fall, also quickly trying to restore his oxygen to his body, wanting so much to continue where they left off. "Oh." Hammy moaned, feeling RJ move him down against the fallen branch they sat upon, helping him onto his back, RJ shifting his position until he towered over the squirrel.

Hammy slipped his hands over RJ's chest once more, moving his hands up and around his neck. After one more quick breath, Hammy pulled RJ down for another intense kiss. RJ wasted no time with niceties, pressing further and deeper into the kiss, growling and grunting deep in his throat, his paws just feeling every inch of Hammy's body with abandon. Hammy held on to dear life, clutching onto RJ's neck, letting RJ dominate over him, responding only in moans and groans.

Never in his wildest dreams did Hammy ever have such a vivid and passionate lovemaking session with RJ. The heat of their passion felt so real, as if every kiss was burned right into their souls. Before, Hammy felt that such pleasure was impossible to ever experience. But just the simple kiss they shared now surpassed any expectation he ever had. He never wanted to wake up. He was in heaven.

Unfortunately, he was just about to fall from there. Literally.

"OOMPH!" All the frantic movement that they were doing on the fallen branch was enough to throw off their balance and send them tumbling down to the hard ground below. Before they could realize it, the pair landed hard on the ground, forcing the air out their lungs, and breaking their kiss.

"Ouch." Hammy grunted as he picked himself off of the ground, the surprise fall from the log enough to break him from the trance he was in. He looked to his side and saw RJ panting hard, as if trying to regain lost breath.

Suddenly, it hit him.

"Oh no… oh no… no… no, this can't be happening." Hammy started to breathe very rapidly. Not due to loss of breath, but rather, he was hyperventilating. He was anxious and afraid. In his mind, he tried to make sense of what was a dream and what was reality. But he was sure that it was real. Everything from the hand holding and the hugs, all the way up to the burning hot kisses they exchanged.

And the tingling pain in his arm. The PAIN in his arm. This was no dream.

"RJ, I'm sorry." Hammy apologized, his voice cracking. "I didn't know. I wasn't thinking. I thought that it was just my imagination, just a silly, stupid dream that I didn't mean to have." He rushed his apology. Despite how dizzy Hammy felt, he felt the need to get away as fast as possible. He had to get away, afraid of the wrath that RJ may unleash upon him now, now that he had forced upon the raccoon the full extent of his desires on him.

"Hammy!" RJ leapt on him. Being too disoriented to dodge, Hammy felt his body fall back, feeling RJ's weight press down upon him as the raccoon pinned him down to the ground, preventing his escape.

"No, I'm sorry!" Hammy blurted out, hot tears now tracing down his face, burning trails down his cheeks. "Don't hurt me, please." He begged, sniffling hard and shaking. He could only hope that RJ's first strike would knock him out, to spare him the pain of being savagely beaten while staying conscious. "RJ, don't hate me." Hammy squeaked, folding his arms over his face, getting ready to defend himself from the blows.

RJ slipped his arms around his wrists and pulled them away from his head. Hammy squinted his eyes shut, not wanting to see what RJ was to do. He gritted his teeth, his eyes burned, and his tears continued to trickle down his face. It was over, he knew it.

"Hammy!" RJ shook him, trying to shake some sense back into the weeping squirrel. "Hammy!" RJ raised his voice, hoping that it would get Hammy to obey him and listen to him. It was no use. The squirrel was too far gone, too convinced that he was to suffer horribly. RJ could only think of one thing to bring the squirrel back.

Hammy tried to fight RJ from turning his head up, to face him. He feared that RJ would torture him, forcing him see himself getting beaten into a pulp. He braced himself.

"Hammy." RJ whispered to him softly before making his move.

"Ummph." Hammy fought back. "Hmmph?" Hammy couldn't figure it out. He expected to be slashed and stomped on. He expected to be shown no mercy. He expected to be dead by the next time he opened his eyes.

But why was he now seeing RJ kissing him? How come he could feel his lips pressed against his, sucking gently and licking his lips ever so tenderly?

Hammy opened his mouth to protest, but it only served as a moment to let RJ invade his mouth and deepen the kiss. Hammy couldn't help himself and moaned ever so softly. RJ pressed deeper into the kiss, lavishing all the attention on the squirrel, moving his hands ever so meaningfully, stroking his chest and neck, massaging him until he could feel Hammy's tension let up a little. Once he felt Hammy was calm enough to talk to, he pulled back, licking Hammy's lips with his tongue once more before retreating it back into his mouth.

"Hammy." RJ spoke softly, seeing Hammy watch him with a look of confusion on his face. He smiled and hugged him gently. Moving his lips over to Hammy's ear, he whispered softly. "How can I hate you, Hammy?" He asked before pulling back to look Hammy square in the eye.

"I love you." RJ nuzzled him. "I love you more than you can imagine." RJ wiped the tears at Hammy's eyes, a smile widening on his face, an action that seemed to put Hammy at ease.

Still, Hammy was cautious, unsure of what to do. He sniffed, clearing his nose, and continued to stare at RJ. Still shaking, Hammy carefully moved his arms up and around RJ's neck, holding them there loosely, just in case he had to pull back for any surprises. RJ only pulled Hammy closer, moving his hands to his back, and now running his hands down his sides and hips and into the small of his back, feeling the curves of his body, just as he remembered RJ doing only moments ago in what he thought was a dream.

"Is this real?" Hammy pulled him into a hug, moving his head under RJ's chin, resting under his muzzle. He was surprised when he felt something press against the top of his head, eventually realizing that RJ had just given him a kiss on his head. Hammy pulled back and looked to RJ, this time more seriously. "Is this still a dream? Am I still imagining things?" Hammy asked him, scanning RJ's face for a reaction. "Is this real?" He asked once more. RJ pressed up against him and opened his mouth.

"As real as you want it to be, Hammy." And with that, RJ closed his eyes and gave Hammy's muzzle a soft lick and a gentle kiss on his lips once more.

When RJ opened his eyes, he looked to see a still rather surprised squirrel: A rather happily surprised squirrel. Hammy shook his head slowly, a smile slowly growing on his lips.

"It's real?" Hammy mouthed his words over and over, the tone of his voice growing, but still low, still finding the truth a little difficult to believe.

"Yeah." RJ replied softly, his own smile growing larger. With every deepening breath he took, he seemed to feel lighter, as if some massive weight that was once crushing him now seemed to be as light as a feather. He felt freer, liberated, alive, these feelings that he had for Hammy bringing him to a new high, a sort of exhilaration and excitement rushing through him. It felt great! And all because Hammy looked to him now with his shining, emerald eyes, reflecting a joy and vivacity he had never seen in the squirrel before.

"I love you Hammy." RJ sighed, feeling something he thought he had felt before, but only now seemed to feel the full breadth of:

True Love.

"I love you RJ." Hammy laughed. "I… I never thought… I… you…" Hammy tried to say between bursts of laughter. "You really… that means…" Hammy's mind was trying to process everything new that he was realizing, confused at the sudden revelation. But one thing was constant. He couldn't help feeling happier and more excited with every passing second. He placed his hands on RJ's chest, feeling the soft fur between his fingers, moving up to his face, tracing the stripes that had constantly caught his eye for so long. He cupped his hand over RJ's cheek and just gazed at him, just admiring how handsome RJ was.

"You look so cute, you know that, Hammy?" Hammy was pleasantly surprised as RJ's hand moved over his face, exploring just as he was. He moved his fingers over Hammy's head, feeling the softer, silky fur. He had to admit, all the nuts that Hammy ate really helped him maintain such a lovely coat. He chuckled to himself as a thought came to his mind. Seeing Hammy's orange fur, he had always wondered, in the back of his mind, what it tasted like. And now, given a chance…

"RJ." Hammy chirred, feeling RJ's tongue lick his cheek, just where the white fur melted into the orange. "That tickles." He pushed RJ back slightly until they were facing each other once again. Hammy wasted no time and pressed forward into a kiss with RJ.

"I love you RJ." He whispered just before their lips met and were once more taken to discover new heights of love and tenderness.

"I love you Hammy."

"I love you RJ."

Over and over, they said to one another wordlessly, their kisses saying more about their love for one another than any mere words could ever say.

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"RJ?" Hammy asked as he lay on his chest, playing with his silvery-white fur, breathing deep his scent all around him.

"Yeah, Hammy?" RJ replied, playing with Hammy's tail with one hand, his other resting in the small of his back.

"What made you change your mind?" He asked.

"Hmm?" RJ stopped playing his Hammy's tail and brought it around to rest on Hammy's neck. "You." Hammy replied.

"Huh?" This time, Hammy stopped playing and turned up to face RJ. Feeling Hammy shifting on his chest, RJ looked down to meet with Hammy's gaze.

"You told me before that you believed that I would never have these feelings for you, right?" RJ asked.

"Yeah." Hammy regretted saying those words somewhat, but wondered what they had to do with how they ended up together now.

"Well, seeing you beating yourself up, I felt so guilty for causing you to go through it needlessly and not doing anything to help you." RJ admitted. "When you started shaking in my arms that day we found you soaking wet from the storm the night before, I feared what might have happened if you didn't get better."

"I'm here now, RJ." Hammy reassured him, a response that brought a smile and kiss from RJ.

"If you died…" RJ started. "I couldn't imagine if you died. I didn't want to. Just the thought of you going away forever scared me like never before. I was scared because there was nothing I could do to stop it from happening, or even delay it." RJ held Hammy close, tears forming in his eyes. "I could talk my way in and out of anything and pull as many tricks I can, but I wouldn't be able to do anything to save you."

"You did save me." Hammy said, moving his hand to RJ's eyes and wiping away the tears that began to form.

"It was then that I realized that I cared for you deeply, that you mean so much to me." RJ said. "But it took having that talk with you and that kiss from Heather to make me realize how much you really meant to me." RJ hugged Hammy tight.

"How much?" Hammy looked to him with loving eyes.

"Everything." RJ replied. "You mean everything to me." RJ kissed Hammy to reaffirm his statement. "I want to protect you, I want to be with you, I want to hold you, I want to be the one to tell you 'I love you' every second of every minute of every hour of every day. I want to be yours."

"I love you too, RJ." Hammy swelled up with pride at RJ's words, the moment special to him since RJ was so very rarely sentimental about anything. And now here he was, pouring out his heart and soul to him.

"I promise I'll never let you go through what you went through. Never again." RJ told him firmly. "I'm so sorry for all the wrong I have ever done to you, for all the pain I caused you, for all the things I failed to do for you." RJ apologized profusely, looking to Hammy for forgiveness.

"I forgive you RJ." Hammy kissed him gently and purred softly.

"I never want to see you get hurt like that again." His voiced softened. "You are sweet, caring, compassionate, honest, vivacious, slightly crazy…" Hammy laughed at the last one. "… and loving." RJ added. "You do not deserve to suffer like that."

"It's okay. I'm alright." Hammy told him.

"No, it's not." RJ retorted. "You deserve the best. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be loved by the one you love." RJ said. "And if you want me still…" RJ looked to Hammy. "I know that I am not the best person in the world, that there are many things about me that I am not proud of, things that would probably disgust you." RJ admitted. "But I want to be the one you love, as broken and flawed as I am." RJ looked to him with sad eyes. Hammy smiled and once more kissed him.

"Even if there were a million other raccoons and I had to pick a million times who to love…" Hammy pulled himself up and looked to RJ straight into his eyes. "I would pick you and you alone a million, no, a million and one times." Hammy smiled and cuddled up to him. "I love you and I always will, RJ, no matter how you are."

"Thank you, Hammy." RJ felt so happy to hear those words. He found complete acceptance in the heart of this young squirrel in his arms. And to think, he was ready to just ignore him and cast away these feelings. That would have truly been the greatest mistake of his life.

But instead, this was the greatest moment in his entire life. And it would be Hammy's following words that he would keep in his heart and etch into his soul, to remind him how precious he really is.

"You see yourself as broken and flawed." Hammy looked into RJ's eyes, so full of love and honesty. "In my eyes, I see you as absolutely perfect."

"I love you so much, Hammy." RJ held him close, sniffling, this time close to crying tears of joy. "Now that I have you, I never want to let you go." RJ whispered to him. "Ever."

"And I'll never let you." Hammy smiled. RJ pulled back, staring back at him with a serious look. All before cracking a smile and breaking out into a loud and hearty laugh.

It was the best laugh that they had ever shared, the best that they ever had.

Once the laughter died down, they looked to each other once more. RJ took Hammy's hand into his and kissed it. Hammy giggled and leaned up to RJ, placing his lips on his. As they wrapped their hands around one another into a warm, comfortable hug, pressing each other deeper into the kiss, they finally realized that they would never have to feel lonely again.

In the most unexpected ways, they had found one another. Though it was not exactly how they expected things would be, somehow it seemed to all work out. For all the drama that they had gone through in the last week, this was their closure, their happy ending.

And as the new couple lay together, bodies entwined and hands exploring one another, holding one another tight as if to bind together their very souls, exchanging loving kisses, so pure and honest, their language of understanding and acceptance, they could think of nothing else except for their newfound love for one another.

This was their new beginning, now that they had found one another, now that they had finally found true love.

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"RJ?" Hammy perked up, cuddling up close to him, his ear to his chest, listening to every beat of his heart.

"Yeah, Hammy?" He cradled the small, soft ball of fur that meant everything in the world to him.

"So when do we tell the family the good news?" Hammy asked. He didn't exactly get the answer he was expecting.

RJ's heart skipped a beat.

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If you have any advice or suggestions, please feel free to review me. All flames will be ignored.

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