LUCID: OMG! I'm happy, and yet I want to ki11 you all…lol! I didn't think it would reach 60 the DAY AFTER I UPDATE. JEEZ! Luckily I had this ready. But, let me clear this up. When I said I wasn't going to update till I reached 60, it didn't mean that when it reached 60 I would update right then, it meant that until I reach 60 I wouldn't update, and then it would happen sometimes AFTER, but not necessarily right exactly then. It could be 68 and I still haven't. I mean, it defiantly means the Update will come faster if the goal is reached faster, so don't think you aren't doing anything. After all, like I said, I won't update until the number goal is reached….but you understand? I'm going to try and make sure I keep up good updating time thought so as long as there is reviews….it shouldn't be too long a wait. Your lucky I had this chapter ready! –cough- I LUV YOU GUYS!
WARNING: boy & boy loving, read or leave!
DISCLAIMER: I….don't….own….Digimon…
START-
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…..
"So how are the lessons going?"
Taichi looked over at his 'intended', leaning heavily against the back of his chair as they ate their fancy lunch.
"They're…going ok. Fine." He answered jerkingly, feeling guilty.
Which there was no reason for…right?
"Hmmmm." She stared over the rim of her wine glass thoughtfully, nursing her sherrie with elegant familiarity. "What's your instructor like?"
Taichi stared at her a moment, feeling his throat tighten as he thought of all the ways he could answer that.
"He's…nice." There, that was safe.
"Oh?" She took another long sip of her fastly emptying glass." You know I heard he was very good looking."
"What!" Taichi squeaked, very uncomfortable all of a sudden.
She wasn't implying anything, was she?
She smiled with amusement, almost smirking in a twisted way. "Yes, the attendee I had to talk to about scheduling the lessons was very…. praising."
Taichi gulped, suddenly needing a drink and taking a long drought from the still full glass before him.
Sora watched him with speculative, cold blue eyes. "…In fact she said he was the most beautiful man she had ever seen."
She gave a short, husky laugh and tossed back the rest of her drink. Raising her hand for a refill, she sat her glass back down and gave a shrug.
"Of course, I'm not worried." She chuckled again, a cold, hard sound that brought a shiver up Taichi's spine.
If only she knew the truth, he thought bitterly, swirling the white wine around in his mouth with his tongue.
At the moment he'd rather have some vodka…
A waiter came over and refilled Sora's glass, holding the wine bottle with a white cloth, and then wiping off any beads of liquid that had spilled onto her glass with it.
Sora didn't even acknowledge him as he bowed and stepped away, just picked up her glass and started sipping away once again.
Taichi set his glass down. Someone would have to drive, after all.
"Maybe I should come with you one of these times."
He stiffened, slowly reaching for his glass once again.
Oh well, they could always call a taxi…or limousine, actually. Sora wouldn't stand for the average Joe's transportation.
"I…don't think that's a good idea…"
She gave him a sharp look, mouth pressing into a flat, suspicious line.
"I mean, aren't you and mother packed for the next few months till the wedding? She told me you still needed to do the guest list." Taichi supplied quickly, suddenly glad his mother had called last night, even if it had been a bit too late for any decent living creature…
Sora nodded slowly, setting her once again empty glass down with a sigh.
"Yes, I suppose I don't really have the time…in fact, I should really get going, I need to get to the tailors for my fitting."
"You're already getting a dress?" He practically squeaked, squeezing the slender neck of his glass a little too hard.
She gave him a cool look.
"Of course I am, I've already waited too long to get it done. It's one of the most important facts of a wedding, Taichi. After all, the attention is going to be on me."
'Us' he corrected softly, in his head. Not daring to say it aloud.
"Well, like I said, I should be going." She started to stand up, and in his rush to get up fast enough to slip on her coat for her and all those rules of chivalry she had demanded of him, knocked over his half fill glass and got a lap full of ice cold alcohol down 'there'.
"Taichi!" She hissed, a look of disgusted horror on her face. "Stop acting like such a fool, I thought those dancing lessons would bring out some deeply buried hint of gracefulness, but I guess not. If you mess up the wedding with your clumsiness you'll be sleeping in the car through the honeymoon."
With those last angry words said so full of contempt, she grabbed up her long silk red coat from the arm of an offering waiter and gave a quick swirl so it settled perfectly around her shoulders.
Giving him another cold look of disgust, she added, "And stay at home tonight. Your father said he wanted to talk to you; he'll probably be calling. And please clean yourself up."
With an angry spin of her heel she walked smoothly down the rows of elegantly furnished tables and through the lobby doors.
Taichi, as he had through the entire episode, stood stock still, still slightly bent over his chair, surrounding by broken glass and starting to shiver from the ice seeping into his pants.
"Can I help you sir?"
He turned with glazed eyes to see a waiter standing nearby for assistance, a cloth hanging from his arm. On his face was an expression of cold amusement and poorly hidden disgust.
Taichi cringed and turned away.
"No…. no I'm fine. Just put this on my tab."
Then with shaking legs he turned and quickly moved down the rows of tables, filled with some curious, some annoyed and sneering people.
All of which he needed to get away.
He needed to get away from these people…. these surroundings.
His crotch felt numb, icy alcohol dripping down the insides of his legs and made his shoes squelch with every step.
It felt like his insides were frozen as he took the same door Sora had only moments ago, ignoring the calls of the finely dressed gentlemen behind the desk and rushing out the fancily painted glass doors.
It just…hurt, inside. Was all he could surmise as he waited shivering for the cocky boy who had driven off in his car earlier to pull up and hand him the keys. Without even handing off a tip he slid in and jammed on the pedal.
He didn't bother to think what transportation Sora must be taking.
He was out of that fancy circle shaped driveway in the front of the building and on the street in less than what was a safe time, tears gathering in his eyes as he went faster and fast, hands gripping the steering wheel like a life line.
Why? Why must this be happening?
Why couldn't he make his own decisions, why couldn't his parents actually love him, why couldn't people listen to and respect him?
Why must he be treated always in such a careless, hurtful way? It was as if no one cared for him in the whole world.
He laughed bitterly at that thought, and resurrected his thinking.
No, that wasn't true, Kairi loved him.
And…. well, maybe not 'love', of course but…Yama…. Yamato must like him right? He was always smiling and laughing…
He seemed happy enough around Taichi. So he must at least enjoy his company, right?
But why was he even thinking of Yamato right now?
He had told himself not to do that!
He screeched to a halt at a red light, barely keeping from sliding into the middle of the intersection and punched the dashboard so hard the windows rattled.
Cars started honked at his wayward car, breaking him from his thoughts and drowning feelings.
With a huge, releasing sigh he laid his head on the steering wheel for a moment, catching back his breathe and wayward emotions.
Finally he sat back up with another small sigh, blinked away the tears threatening to spill from his eyes and quickly pulled back onto the right lane, driving at a much slower speed, fingers lax on the wheel.
Damnet….
Twenty minutes later he was dragging his feet through the front door and throwing his coat haphazardly across a nearby stool, dragging a hand painfully through his messy, knotted hair and taking a deep, shaky breath.
At least he was home….
Slamming the door, he grabbed the phone and moved across the room to fall onto the couch, sniffing loudly as he punched in the numbers.
He tried to steady his breathing as he listened to the rings.
At the third ring, their was a click and a familiar voice saying "Moshi moshi, Kairi speaking."
"Kairi." Was all he got out before his throat tightened with that familiar pull of tears, and he had to stop to control himself.
She seemed to have gotten most of it from that one word. She always was perceptive.
"Tai, are you okay? What's going on?" Worry seeped into her tone.
He waited a moment, sighing, and then cleared his throat before answering softly.
"I don't love her."
"What? Who? Sora? Tai, what's going on?" She was blatantly spazzing out now, demanding an answer immediately, and asking if he had been crying.
At first it was hard to speak, he kept choking on the tears he was trying to push down and having to stop and steady himself. But after the first few sentences it all poured out in a rush of recent pain.
"And then I just stood their thinking…it hit me like a ton of bricks…. this is who I'm supposed to be in love with? To be with? To live with the rest of my life?" He continued, voice scratchy from crying.
"Tai…. You just figured out you don't love her? What about asking her to marry you?"
"You know that wasn't my decision." He said wearily, sinking back into the cushions. "But I thought it wouldn't be too bad…She seemed nice at first…. or maybe that was only being polite. She wasn't bad looking, and for once I could do something mom & dad really wanted, you know? I thought…. I thought I could learn to love her…. I knew I didn't love her then but…. I thought I could learn…" He finished in the tiniest of whispers, the hand not holding the phone clenched painfully in his lap.
"Oh Taichi…" Kairi sighed, using his full name for once instead of the usual nickname.
"What am I going to do Kairi?" He asked hopelessly, knowing she wouldn't have an answer, not one he could fallow anyway.
He heard the soft static of her sighing across the phone.
"I don't know Taichi. You know what I'll say, & we both know you won't listen. I don't see why you care what mom and dad think so much anyway." She finished in a bitter tone.
He closed his weary eyes and let his head hit the back of the couch as he answered.
"I don't know either, Kairi. Sometimes…I really wish I didn't."
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It was Saturday, meaning another lesson with Yamato. He felt less nervous, more subdued as he walked down the hall towards the familiar red door, hands shoved into the pockets of the coat thrown over his 'dancing outfit'.
The revelation that he didn't love Sora, & couldn't love her…didn't even LIKE her had thrown everything into perspective.
He was going to live a long, horribly painful life with someone who thought he was an idiot and didn't have a problem with saying so every other sentence.
There wouldn't be any of the warm feelings, the cold nights cuddling by the fire; the long walks on the beach and most importantly someone to always be there, to listen, to comfort, to understand and to love you.
Someone to love.
A tremulous smile skittered across his lips and disappeared.
Who knew he was such a romantic?
He opened the door and went inside.
"Oh, Taichi, I was wondering when you'd show up."
Taichi smiled unsurely, shutting the door carefully behind him and walking slowly over to Yamato, who was dressed in the same pants he had first seen him in, those tan khaki shorts with a waistline that kept sliding lower & lower, & a yellow shirt with a smiley face on the front.
"Hey." He said softly, wondering if Yamato would mention their last encounter.
He had decided it had only been a polite thank you, from the spontaneous dance teacher and chose not to think anything else of it. Nothing more.
Things were too complicated as it was.
"How was your day?" Yamato smiled warmly, hand on hip.
"It…" Taichi stopped and looked at the ground for a moment, eyes blank. When he looked back up, there was a small smile etched permanently on his face." It was fine. Yours?"
Yamato tilted his head and looked at him in an incredibly cute way that Taichi, even in his low feeling status had to blush at mentally.
He was just so pretty…
"It was okay. My feet are sore from my last student; she has two left feet and genes that reject any movement that requires grace. " He said this as he turned to turn on the CD player, flipping a switch that induced the air with a snappy, fast tune.
Taichi grinned despite himself, Yamato's light tone bringing up his spirits.
"Sounds like someone I know."
Yamato gave a sweet, clear laugh as he stood back up and stepped over to Taichi, that beautiful smile bright on his face.
"Oh, you're not that bad Taichi, believe me, there are much, much worse."
Taichi felt him self-smiling back, with a true smile in fact, suddenly feeling like his insides were made of warm cream and sugar melting into a gooey marshmallow.
"Here, give me your coat & I'll put it over by the wall, go ahead and start stretching."
Taichi slipped out his coat and gave it to him, then did as he said, taking off his shoes first and then fallowing the movements of stretching Yamato had taught him.
After a few minutes, Yamato said he was ready.
"Now, for today I have one of my favorites. It's called the Foxtrot, ever heard of it?"
Taichi nodded hesitantly, faintly remembering it from some old, foreign movie Kairi had forced him to watch with her."
Taichi wasn't so sure.
"Okay, well it's a little different than what we've done. It's a combination of both quick and slow steps, like you'll be going slow one minute, then speed up the pace and then slow down again. You move in a half-circle, zigzag motion…and here, put one hand just below my arm, yes, like that, and the other…" Taichi felt his face heat up as Yamato took his hand into his own, delicate soft one. "And the other one here."
He moved them close enough that they stood a foot apart, then directed Taichi to put the foot in which direction they were going turned out, and the other turned in.
"Now, this is a quick step, & we're going to be doing a variation of one-step two-steps movement, I want you just to try and fallow me at first, so we can just get into that feeling of the motion, okay?"
Taichi took a deep breath and nodded, unconsciously squeezing Yamato's hand a little harder and trying not to let his uncertainty show.
This had to be the hardest one they had done yet…
He didn't want to look clumsy in front of Yamato.
Not after…. today…
"Alright then, take a breath and -we're going to the right, remember- and go!"
They started out slow, and then went fast and once again slow, moving carefully across the room.
Even though they were doing a slower than normal version, Taichi had a hard time remembering to turn his foot at the right time and fallow the steps. And especially when to go slow and when to go faster He kept staring down at their feet to make sure he was doing it right.
"Taichi, stop looking down at you're feet, it will only make you trip"
Taichi didn't seem to hear him.
They slowed to a stop & Taichi looked up into those honeydew eyes, only a few inches away. He felt the familiar heat on his neck.
"I-I can't help it…I don't want to mess up." He said softly, breath stolen away by the softness in those golden pools
Yamato smiled gently, squeezing his hand, and causing Taichi to loosen his death grip with an embarrassed look.
"Just relax. It's not like it matters if you mess up, right? That's what the lessons are for, learning. & You mess up when you learn."
Taichi stared at him with wide, incredulous eyes and then suddenly let go of his hand and spun away, burying his face in his hands and squeezing back the tears that filled his eyes.
Damnet! Why!
Why did Yamato have to be so kind, so sweet? So caring? Why couldn't the person he was marrying be as gentle as him?
He wished….
…He wished…
"Taichi?"
He stiffened as he felt a hand touch his shoulder hesitantly before carefully resting there, trying to ignore the warmth that simple caring touch spread.
"Taichi, what's the matter?" Yamato asked softly.
Taichi took a deep breath and let it out, shaking his head and glancing with a watery smile over his shoulder at Yamato.
"I'm sorry. I'm being stupid again…I just…." He trailed off uncertainly.
Yamato didn't say anything, just waited quietly for him to gain his bearings enough to answer.
"I'm just having some…. problems at home. I guess the stress is getting to me…that's all." He assured Yamato, who had a worried look in his eyes.
"Taichi, if you feel that strung out, why don't you go home, today's lesson can wait.
"No!"
Yamato jumped and jerked back his hand, stepping back apace and crossing his arms as if he had suddenly caught a chill.
"Damnet! I'm sorry Yamato, like I said I'm stressed, I'm just being stupid. But I don't want to go home…. I need to get away." Taichi groaned, tugging at his hair.
Yamato bit his lip and looked away, sighing.
"Well, I don't think you're going to learn much like that."
There was a moment of silence as neither moved or said anything.
Taichi was inwardly screaming at himself for having lashed out at Yamato, who had only been his sweet self and tried to help.
Idiot, idiot idiot!
An idea suddenly lit up his face, his fists unclenching at his sides.
"Hey Yamato….." He started quietly, training his eyes onto the blond.
"Hmm?" Yamato muttered softly, staring at the door, seemingly lost in thought.
"Go out with me."
Yamato snapped out of his daze and stared at him with what looked to Taichi like complete horror.
"What!"
"No, no! You misunderstood me, I meant to say…to say, well…. do you have any other classes today?" He finished lamely after his sputtered first words, face redder than the door.
"No…" Yamato said slowly, looking at him with an unreadable expression.
"Then come with me, somewhere. Anyway. Not like…what you were thinking. Just for fun. I…I don't want to be alone…"
Taichi could have strangled himself for how pathetic he sounded.
Yamato watched him for a long time, not saying anything, just seemingly figuring something out in his head.
Finally he sighed and shrugged, a bashful smile on his face, eyes sparkling playfully.
"Why not? It could be fun."
Taichi let out the breath he didn't know he had been holding and smiled back widely, feeling as though he had just won some sort of award.
"So it's a yes, then?" He said, grinning, suddenly looking forward to the rest of today.
Yamato smiled softly & nodded.
"It's a date."
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OWARI
LUCID: Review, Review, Review! –cough- aaaand, ummm….I think I won't update till I reach 78 this time I need to rest….-coughs up blood- hehehe, joking joking (that's not a random number actually, its 15 reviews from what there is now)
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REVIEW REPLIES
Jenn120- (lol! This soon enough? –glomps- thanks so much for reviewing! –cuddles- ahhhh….buuuuuddy)
Pie Junkie- ( It's my Pie! –glomps- and YES I reached sixty! Far too soon! –dies- I'm reeeeaaally happy though,l ol! Thanx to you! –glomps- Thanx for reviewing! –gives cream pie-)
Tyleet27- ( OMG! You know, your not the first person to say that! They must be a lot alike though, right? I swere I havn't seen it, but if it's a love story like this…I'd like to see it a lot! Thing is I don't speak Japanese so I would have to see the 'Lame American' one! –sad face- for some reason whenever someone sais 'shall we dance' I think of the King & I….I love that movie thanks so much for reviewing! –hugs & snuggles- I really got to see that movie now….)
Estelle- (really REALLY! Oh thank you thank you! –hugs tightly- I'm so glad you do! Thanks so much for updating, -glomps-I luv you!)
Flakes-of-Snow- (Well gosh –draws finger in the sand and blushes- lol! JK,JK Thank you for reviewing! Ahhh, yes, teasing. Teasing is fun -huggles- lol, myyyyyy Flakey –cuddles)
Slushie Blu- (Oh, thank you so much! I can't believe so many people like the story…..whoot! –tackles- thanx for reviewing!….when I read your name I want to go to 7-eleven….hehehe -snuggles-)
Dark Metal Angel of Destruction- ( "as always"? Really? Oh thankyou! I always am afraid I'll be worse than what I put out last time –snuggles- thank you for saying so. And thankyou for reviewing! –hugs back- buddy! )
Smoondigiboy- (lol! I luv the name! –glomps- I'm so glad you like it thanks for updating! –huggles)
Hakion n' Xubose- ( yes! It's finally going somewhere! –glomps- whoot! Long review! LOVE THEM! –sugar high hug- oohhhh, the 'slick individual' –shifty eyes- who is he? And what does he want with Yamato?….actually that's a little TOO obvious…lol! Ahhh, you always say nice things, thank you so much! Your reviews are always great to read! -huggles to self- miiiiiiiine.)
Angel-with-a-scythe- ( Oh, thank you thank you thank you! –glomps- & I know! Its bad bad bad….I wouldn't mind an editer at all, but we would have to talk about it first, lol, figure things out. And just thanxs again for reviewing! –hugs-)
Yoshi-iso-cute- ( lol! Yea! Score for Taichi! –high-fives hmmmmmm, I guess we'll just have to wait and see who is he is,ne?lol! –huggles- your so funny! I LOVE Daisuke! You're my Daisuke! –cuddles tight- thankyou for reviewing! )
I LoVe ShInY ThInGz- (oh geez, lol! Sorry! Thanx for pointing that out, I shall fix it! Heeeey, they aren't wrong!…not necessarily anyways –winks- but hey, who knows? –shrugs- lol! It's fun guessing YAY! 60! You win a prize! –gives trophy and grande muffin- -kisses- there! –sniggles- thank you so much for reviewing, loves you, lol )
Tysonandkai- ( Ahhhhh, thank you! And me too, Tai and Yama RoCK! Whoot whoot! –glomps- thank you for reviewing! I like Ty and Kai too, lol! –snuggles)
Gryphondelta215- (Your welcome my finely feathered friend …..technically….lol! –huggles- thanx for reviewing, it's getting so high! –kisses- -hugs-)
PS. Forgive the explicit typos --