Chapter 16- Grocery Shopping
When they left Walmart the day before, Liz had zapped Sonic so many times with the tazer he had to be carried out in a shopping cart.
Liz had gotten a ticket for parking in the fire lane but she just tore it up. "Not my car!" she had said.
And now they are just about to go see their new house! (even though it was built exactly like the old house…)
Sonic was still shaken from being tazed so many times but he said it was worth it to be able to zap Liz. Sonic couldn't even run to the house so he had to go in the car with Liz!
Amy, Tails, and Sonic piled into the car with looks of terror on their faces.
When they did reach the house Sonic had to be pried off the seat he was so scared.
When they went inside they were amazed to find that Liz had already had all the furniture moved to the house and everything was exactly how they had left it! Knuckles even found his half-eaten apple under his bed!
The only difference was before they had a crappy 12 inch tv, now they had a giant plasma flat-screen with surround sound and all that good stuff! YAY FOR TV!
Liz drove back to the hotel and got all their stuff and brought it back for them so they didn't have to go back in the car with her. Just goes to show how nice she can be when she's not tazing a small blue hedgehog.
That afternoon when everyone had finally resumed their normal lives, and Liz no longer had a car to drive (the neighbors had discovered Liz had stolen the car and took it back.) they all decided it was a good time to relax.
Shadow looked outside the window and realized something, "What happened to the pool?" he asked.
"What pool?" Liz asked.
Shadow opened his mouth to say something but then spotted the angry therapists in the corner and shut it… he was sick of being in a straightjacket, no matter how weird this story was.
Shadow resisted the urge to shout, "SHE JUST SAID IT WAS A STORY!"
"YOU'RE ALL DRIVING ME NUTS!" Shadow screamed, then he ran up the stairs and slammed the door to his room.
The therapists in the corner made a note on their clipboards about violent behavior.
"I still think he should get shock therapy." Hannah said as she turned on their new plasma tv.
"What happened to your mushy, romantic, attitude in chapter eight?" Liz asked.
Just then Shadow came out of his room and appeared at the top of the stairs, "I just want to say… that I hate you all… SO… MUCH! DAMN YOU ALL!" he screamed.
Then he went into his room cussing.
The therapists made another note about violent behavior at the mention of romance between him and Hannah.
"Well, after you stopped narrating about our room we made a pact to forget everything that happened in the hotel." Hannah said.
"Really?" Liz asked, "That's… ironic…"
"WHY DON'T YOU ATTACK THEM! THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT IT BEING A STORY TOO!" Shadow screamed from upstairs.
"Because we're special! You're just as stupid black hedgehog!" Hannah shouted.
"So are you." Liz pointed out.
"DAMN YOU!" Hannah screamed, then she stormed up the stairs to her room and slammed the door.
"Now you know how I feel!" Shadow shouted to her.
"STOP YELLING YOU BASTARDS!" Knuckles shouted from his room.
Liz groaned and went into the kitchen, "Uh oh…"
"What's wrong?" Tails asked coming upstairs from the basement.
"We don't have any food." Liz said, "You know what that means!" she said taking out a pair of car keys.
"Oh shit…" Tails mumbled.
"WE'RE GOING GROCERY SHOPPING!" Liz screamed, "EVERYONE INTO THE CAR!"
"you don't have a car anymore!" Tails argued.
"I'll steal it back then." Liz said running outside.
As Liz ran over to the neighbor's yard everyone came into the kitchen, "Did Liz just say we had to go grocery shopping?" Sonic asked.
"Yes." Tails said, "But maybe it would be better if only a few of us went to make sure she didn't go crazy."
"Hey, everyone has to come!" Liz shouted from outside. Then she honked the horn of the minivan she'd stolen, "Lets get a move on!"
Everyone made their way outside and piled into the van.
Ten terrifying minutes later…
Everyone scrambled out of the van and kissed the ground thanking the sweet lord they were alive.
Liz came out of the car too and smiled, "Alright, lets go!" she shouted. Then the van started to roll backwards, "Oops, forgot to put it on park."
The van slammed into another car and Liz ran into the store screaming, "RUN! NOBODY WILL KNOW IT'S OUR CAR!"
Everyone followed her into the store.
Liz grabbed a cart, "Alright guys, get whatever you want. Meet you up here in half an hour." Then she rode off down the aisles on her cart.
Everyone else split up to look for their favorite food.
Tails was looking in the organic food section when Amy passed by, "Hey Tails, have you seen Sonic?" she asked.
"He's probably off trying to find chili dogs or something." Tails said.
"Thanks." Amy ran off to find Sonic just as Shadow ran by being chased by his therapists.
Tails put some food in the basket he'd gotten and left the aisle. Lucky for him he left when he did for at the second he cleared the aisle the shelves toppled as Rouge climbed on top of them and ran across the shelves to escape Knuckles.
Frozen section…
Sonic, who was now being followed by Amy, was looking at ice cream. Mmm ice cream.
"Get this one! It's on sale!" Amy said.
"Why? I'm not paying, Liz is." Sonic argued.
"Why can't you just be nice and save her a little money?"
"Because she doesn't need to save money for anything. What? Do you think she's going to college or something?"
Just then Liz flew by riding on a shopping cart and whacked Sonic in the head with a frozen chicken, "I'M SMARTER THAN YOU, YOU STUPID HEDGEHOG!" she shouted. Then she made a sharp turn and was out of sight.
Sonic rubbed his head where she hit him with the chicken and grabbed the ice cream that was on sale.
"Aww, poor Sonikku, do you want me to kiss it and make it better?" Amy asked hugging Sonic.
"Uh… no thanks." Sonic said, "Here, hold this." He added shoving the ice cream into her arms. Then he turned and ran away.
Amy paused then went to get a cart to put things in.
Shadow had an armful of waffles and was trying to balance them while he walked back to his cart.
Hannah came down the aisle he was in and paused to watch this strange spectacle. Then she went up to him and knocked the waffles out of his hands and slapped him, "Stop using that stupid cliché!" she shouted angrily.
"But I love waffles!" Shadow said sadly.
"No you don't, you're just being tricked into thinking you do. The real fact is that people have come across the strange concept that you love waffles and Sonic is obsessed with pancakes. You have to snap out of it and let everyone know the truth: boxed breakfast food sucks!" Hannah said.
Shadow paused then started picking up the waffles.
Hannah rolled her eyes and went past him, "Stupid hedgehog." She mumbled.
Rouge was on top of the shelves jumping from one to another still trying to get away from Knuckles who was now trying to get her down by throwing dog biscuits at her.
Hannah stopped him and snatched one of them from his arms, "You throw like a girl." She said. Then she turned and chucked the biscuit at Rouge who fell off the shelves with a crash.
"Thanks." Knuckles said as he ran to find Rouge.
Hannah went to the soda aisle to find Liz trying to fit four packs of black cherry soda into the bottom of her cart and wasn't having much success.
"What are you doing?" Hannah asked.
"What does it look like? I'm trying to fit four packs of black cherry soda into the bottom of my cart and I'm not having much success." Liz said.
"I don't think you need that much soda." Hannah said.
"Sure I do. Have you ever seen this kind of soda on sale before? I'm probably the only human alive who likes this kind of stuff!" Liz said.
"Human?" Hannah mumbled.
Liz glared at her, "I'll pretend you didn't say that."
Hannah went the other way trying to find an ounce of sanity in the store they had invaded.
Meanwhile…
Tails was hiding in a corner armed with a ham.
Amy came up to him, "Hey Tails, what're you doing?" she asked.
"The cashiers are after me!" Tails said.
Amy stared at him, " I think you've inhaled some pesticides." She said.
"No I haven't!" Tails said angrily. As he did a can of hornet killer fell from his 'pocket'.
Tails stared at it for a moment then shouted, "I'M NOT CRAZY!" and ran away to mobilize his troops.
"They're finally getting to him." Amy said sadly shaking her head.
Shadow came down the aisle with a cart full of waffles and saw Amy, "What's wrong with Tails? He was talking to a milk carton." Shadow said.
"He's… going through a tough time…" Amy said, then she ran the opposite way.
Shadow went after her to the front of the store where everyone was waiting, minus Tails.
Liz was holding a nail gun to Sonic's head as he took the food out of the carts.
"Where's Tails?" Rouge asked trying to unlock the handcuffs Knuckles had put on her hand to keep her close.
Amy opened her mouth to reply but as she did the cashier jumped onto the conveyor belt and blew into a loud horn.
Everyone stared at him. Then the other cashiers ran over and pulled out samurai swords, "You are our prisoners!" one shouted.
Liz raised an eyebrow, "What's going on?"
"Wow, Tails was right." Amy said.
Then suddenly hundreds of foxes came from outside and began to battle with the cashiers. Tails came in after them along with a red fox.
"Thanks for loaning me your army, Akeii." Tails said.
"No problem. Just make it quick, we have a battle with the hedgehogs at five." Then Akeii turned and left.
Tails went up to Amy, "See, it wasn't the pesticides making me crazy!" he declared.
Then a cashier ran up to Shadow and stabbed his waffles.
"NOOOO!" Shadow cried holding the torn box, "Don't worry! You'll be okay! Who knows CPR?"
Sonic slapped Shadow, "Get a hold of yourself man!" he shouted, "Everyone knows pancakes are better!"
"WOULD YOU TWO STOP OBSESSING!" Hannah screamed.
Liz looked at the battle in front of them, "Let's grab the stuff and get out of here before they realize we didn't pay!"
So they ran out of the store and hijacked a train home.
Later…
The fox army had destroyed all the cashiers and were now robbing the 'Dunkin' Donuts' in the store and drinking coffee.
"This coffee stuff is great! We should get some of this back home." One said.
"Too bad coffee beans won't be grown in our area of the world for at least another thousand years." Another said.
Then one of the cashiers, who had been stabbed and pretended to be dead stood up and ran out of the store screaming, "WE SHALL HAVE OUR REVENGE!"
"Do you think he'll really be back?" the first soldier asked.
"Nah, we left reinforcements outside. He doesn't stand a chance."