September 2
This morning we were all awoken by a very bad song. It was sung very out of tune and the singer had no singing voice whatsoever. It was something like:

"My Lily,
My beautiful Lily,
My flower!"

The first thing Iris said was, "What the hell is that?" She has never been a morning person.

Lily was white and her nostrils were flaring. "Potter," she said in a really menacing voice.

"My Lily,
My Lily,
Won't you-"

"POTTER!" Lily yelled.

"Yes, my love?" James asked in a really annoyingly sweet voice.

"WHERE ARE YOU?" I never knew that Lily could yell so loudly.

"That's a secret." Leave it to James Potter to irritate Lily in the morning.

It was then that Lily started yelling her head off about spying or whatever, and Iris threw a pillow at her to make her shut up. It only made her yell even louder.

Stacy and I searched frantically for the source of his annoying voice. I had never hated James as much as Lily, but believe me, at that moment I was ready to blow his head off for waking us like that. I mean, my hair was sticking up and everything!

It was while I was rummaging through my trunk, looking for him, that Stacy screamed. I turned around and saw her pointing at the window.

Floating outside our window on his broomstick was James Potter, grinning cockily. I rushed over to the window and gave him a quick warning.

"James! You better get out of here fast, Lily's in a bad mood-"

But James cut in, merely saying, "I'll take care of that."

I stood aside to make way for Lily, who was stomping over to the window.

"JAMES POTTER!" she screeched.

James blinked and winked at me. "Can I help you?" he asked her innocently.

If only Frank would float outside my window and sing to me. It's a very romantic idea. I wonder why it irritates Lily so much. If Frank (or any other boy, for that matter) treated me the way James treats Lily, I would be in heaven. But that will probably never happen. I mean, I'm seventeen and I've never had a boyfriend. How pathetic is that?

"Please, remove yourself from this window," she demanded as calmly as she could.

"Not until you agree to go out with me!"

Lily screamed. "URGH! JAMES POTTER! YOU ARE THE MOST ARROGANT, BULLYING IDIOT I HAVE EVER MET IN MY LIFE! DO YOU ENJOY MAKING MY LIFE MISERABLE? WELL, LET ME TELL YOU THIS: MY LIFE IS HARD ENOUGH WITHOUT IDIOTS LIKE YOU FLOATING AROUND ON BROOMSTICKS OUTSIDE MY WINDOW! I HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE! I SWEAR ON ALICE'S LIFE, POTTER, THAT IF YOU EVER, EVER, SAY SO MUCH AS ONE WORD TO ME, OR EVEN GIVE ME A LETTER, I WILL THROW MYSELF OFF THE TOP OF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER!"

She said it so severely that I won't be surprised if she actually DOES throw herself off the top of the Astronomy Tower, some day.

And then it would all be my fault. Why? Because I am her best friend and should have somehow prevented it all from happening. Also, in our third year I sat next to Sirius in Transfiguration and, while sitting next to him, I should have told him to tell James never to float on a broomstick outside the girls' dormitory window and sing some hideous song and refuse to leave when asked to. PLUS in our first year, I got sorted right after Katie Shamber (now a Hufflepuff), who later dated Remus. That very minute that she had passed me the Sorting Hat, I should have told her that when she went on a date with Remus Lupin three years later, she should tell him to tell James never to float on a broomstick outside the girls' dormitory window and sing some hideous song and refuse to leave when asked to. And if this isn't enough, then there's that little detail that me and Lily are related. My mum's sister's husband's former wife's brother's daughter's cousin's son's wife's sister is Lily's mum. We like to say we're half sisters. So, seeing as we are related, it would all be my fault if Lily threw herself off the top of the Astronomy Tower.

Why is my life so confusing?

Lily just slammed the window shut and stormed into the bathroom. I looked out the window and watched James fly away, his head hanging down.

I actually felt sorry for James Potter.

Later, History of Magic

I hate this subject. I mean, what's the point, anyway? WHO CARES ABOUT GOBLIN WARS?

And Binns is SO boring. I bet he knew Godric Gryffindor personally, he's that old.

Iris is putting on black nail polish, Peter is asleep, Stacy is looking at the professor with this glazed look, James and Sirius are laughing over something, Paul is playing tic tac toe with himself, Remus and Lily ARE ACTUALLY TAKING NOTES and Frank (heart flutters) is reading a book. I saw the title five seconds ago. It's Quidditch Through The Ages.

Frank is a Quidditch player by the way, did I ever mention that? He's a Keeper on the Gryffindor team. James is a Seeker, Iris, Derrick (fourth year) and Aninka (second year) are Chasers, and two buffoons from third year are Beaters.

I bet I can't play Quidditch. I can't do anything else, really, so why should I be able to play Quidditch? I mean, honestly.

Lily occasionally stops taking notes to glare at James. Now Sirius has passed her a note. She's reading it. I bet she'll kill the Marauders one day. I wouldn't be surprised. Now she's passed it to me. Here's what it says:

Lily-
James wants to know if you'll forgive him.
Circle one: yes no
- Sirius

Lily just took the note back and is ripping it up in front of both of them. James looks pretty hurt. Sirius is patting him on the back.

Iris just finished painting her nails bright pink and passed me a note:

Alice,
Wouldn't it be cool to try and get Lily and James together?
Iris

Um, no. They hate each other. Or at least, Lily hates James. Their relationship would last about a week. If not less.

Iris should be asking people how to get me and Frank together. Our relationship would last forever. Or at least I think so.

Note to self: Borrow Quidditch Through The Ages from the library this afternoon. That way, I can try to talk to Frank about it!