Again this is one of those chapters where you are either going to love me or hate me. I think we have established that I don't care either way.

And has anyone seen Brothers and Sisters? I smell a new fav for Kendel, that pilot was AMAZING. Three thumbs up.

Now that I am finished writing this chapter, I should go watch episode 1 of the new season. I have still only seen episode 2. I was going to watch it earlier but then Acadieman was on, and watching a badly drawn cartoon spray paint 'phoque' on a giant lobster is just plain class. I couldn't miss that. C'est Supa'Cool ca. Plus you get great quotes like "Tes mittens sont hawt," and "Cet song la 'tait si mal, que si j'etais sur la Titanic je t'utilise toi-la as un floatation device", And if any of you speak french, I know that the grammar in those quotes didn't exist, but not only is that the point, it's how people here talk. 'Tis love.

Now read, this is my favorite chapter so far... I think... top 5 easy. And remember OOOO means there is a flashback in your future.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Do you think they even care that we know?"

Mark stopped stirring the scrambled eggs and moved to stand by the window with her. "Addison and Derek tend to do whatever they want despite what people think."

"I have only known about them 24 hours, and I have seen them making out on the couch, he spent the night, they had their hands all over each other when I walked in here to get coffee, and now... now I don't even know what they are doing."

Mark squinted, "They are putting up a hammock."

"A hammock," Izzie repeated, "This is like living with horny teenagers. It's not even 9 yet and I want to gouge my eyes out." She groaned, "How do I tell one of my best friends that I ate breakfast while watching her boyfriend make out with his ex-wife against a tree."

"I'd leave that part out."

"Seriously. They must know that we can see them. I mean have some consideration for other people."

Mark chuckled bitterly, "You will come to find out, that things can get as bad as they can get between them, and they will still only really notice each other."

OOOO

She was gone before he could register what happened. He had been with Addison, making love to Addison, and then she had been gone. It wasn't until he heard their voices that he realized what had happened. Derek had come home.

Derek had walked in and Addison had seen him and chased him, all without Mark even noticing they were no longer alone. He felt his heart drop, from where she was, she couldn't have seen the door. She had sensed Derek rather then seen or heard him.

Mark eased himself off the bed. He dressed and glanced around the room. He couldn't go downstair. That would only make things worse.

He winced as he heard glass break. If he was a betting man he would have to wager that the glass vase in the entrance had just been destroyed. He couldn't help but hope that it had broken over Derek's head.

Mark sat in a chair by the window. Tomorrow he would talk to Derek. He would explain that he had meant no more to Addison then anyone else. It was just physical. There was no emotion and no connection.

But that would be a lie. It was emotion for him. There was a connection for him. He wanted to protect her, and take care of her. He wanted to be there for her, all the time, not just when she was battling demons and needed a temporary fix.

Derek should be yelling at him not her.

He heard a thud, then silence. He was still, he prayed that one of them would yell something. Just to let him know that she was okay.

He took a step towards the door, but froze when he heard the front door slam.

Derek had left.

Of all the responses, Mark had not expected Derek to leave.

He'd expected Derek to come barreling back up the stairs. He expected Derek to fight him, then throw him out on the street and never talk to him again. He expected that Addison would call, a few weeks later, apologize for ruining their friendship and then ask about some trivial thing in his life that she had heard from his sister. She wouldn't mention the affair, she probably wouldn't classify it as an affair because that would give it to much significance. She would just apologize for how things turned out with him and Derek. Because that was the real issue. She had chosen the wrong man this time. She'd ruined a friendship.

He hadn't expected him to leave.

Mark stared as Addison reentered the bed room.

She was completely disheveled, her robe was starting to fall open and her cheek was bright red.

"Get out."

"Did he hit you?"

"Get out."

"He hit you?"

"Only after I punched him, scratched him and almost dislocated his shoulder."

"He hit you..."

"Get out Mark."

"I am going to kill that son of a bitch."

"Get OUT"

"No, Addison. I am not leaving you. Not now."

"Mark..."

"No, I love you."

Addison stared at him, completely and utterly dumbfounded, "I am going to be sick."

XXXX

Izzie stared at him, her jaw slack, "He hit her?"

The door to the patio opened and Derek and Addison walked through laughing, Addison walking backwards pulling Derek into the house behind her.

"I'm sorry, but if I am going to lay in a hammock I need a colourful drink with an umbrella."

"It's October. It's cold. Your wearing the worlds biggest fluffiest sweater. You look cute, but you'll look crazy holding that drink."

Addison stopped walking so that Derek was standing close to her and grinned, "Well maybe you should get to work finding me some cider."

Izzie couldn't stand it anymore, "You hit her?" she spat out.

Derek instantly paled.

Addison turned on Mark, "You self righteous jackass."

"You have a scar," Mark exclaimed defensively, "I had to stitch you back up."

Derek wavered, then turned and stumbled from the house.

"Derek," Addison called after him, "MARK," she hit him on the shoulder, "What the hell are you thinking."

"It's the truth Addison."

"It's your version of the truth. You weren't there, you don't know."

"I know that you walked into that bedroom with your cheek all red, and I remember seeing a gash on your face the next day that you needed stitches for."

"2 stitches. You gave me 2 stitches. And I would have been perfectly okay without them, except from the headache from you never shutting up."

"He left a mark on you Addison. You have a scar."

"Barely," Addison threw her hands up in the air, "God, no one has ever noticed. He has never noticed, and he knows every mark, every imperfection, everything about me." Addison grabbed her car keys, "Did you ever think that maybe you are the only one that can see it because you are the reason that I have it!"

Mark and Izzie watched the glass on the door shake as she slammed it behind her.

Izzie buried her face in her arms, "I hate you for dragging me into this."

OOOO

Mark straightened up as he saw her, he knew if he waited in neuro long enough one of them would show up.

Addison smiled as she approached the nurses station, "Is my husband close by? I need to talk to him."

The nurse looked at her curiously, "Dr. Shepherd isn't here today. He took a sick day."

Addison smiled stayed in place, "Well, I guess that will teach me not to check my messages. I'll run home and check on him now. Thank you."

Addison turned from the desk and the smiled instantly faded replaced by grief and guilt. She glanced up and locked eyes with Mark who was standing a few feet away.

"I told you to leave me alone."

"I needed to see you. I'm worried about you." Mark reached out to touch her arm.

"Don't touch me," she hissed, "Don't even talk to me. My husband thinks that I cheated on him. He thinks that you meant something..."

"Didn't I?" Mark cut her off.

"What is wrong with you? I love my husband. Love. I love him so much that the word love doesn't really even begin to describe it. How can you think you can even begin to touch that?"

"Dr. Shepherd?"

Addison spun on the intruder, "What?"

"The Boss wants to see you. In his office. Now."

4 hours later Mark tracked her down to a small bar he knew the Shepherds often snuck away to after work.

"An 'unspecified amount of time', "Addison said icily as Mark slid into the booth beside her, "That's what the Boss said. Derek has left the hospital for an 'unspecified amount of time'."

"He'll come back," Mark replied.

"He's left town," Addison continued, "His cell has been out of range all day. I have been calling... Do you have any idea where he would have to be to be out of range? There are cell towers everywhere. He's not in Manhattan, he not in the Hamptons. He's not at his parents, or his sisters. He has disappeared."

"He needs time."

"He needs to come home so I can explain that just because it's you doesn't mean it meant something. God. I mean I get it. I screwed up. I shouldn't have used the house. I'd be furious if I walked on that too. I get it. And I wasn't thinking." Addison picked up her phone and shook it, "And if you would get your stubborn ass near a goddamn roaming tower I could tell you that!"

"I'll leave you to you misery then," Mark sighed and stood up/

"You are my misery," he heard her murmur as he walked away.

XXXX

"I wish you would stop telling me these stories." Izzie exclaimed, "Right now I think Derek is a bastard and Addison is an idiot and I am telling Meredith everything the moment I see her."

"I'm not telling you this for Meredith anymore," he reached over and took her hand, "I am telling you for me."

OOOO

"He is going to leave me."

Mark stared at Addison. She was sitting on the front steps of her house just staring into space, it was the first time in over a week that she'd come near the house, She had been camped out at the hospital since Derek disappeared.

"He isn't coming back. He's in Seattle. He is... he's going to leave me."

"Addison," he said softly, sitting beside her, careful not to touch her, "What happened?"

"The Boss," Addison said slowly, her voice devoid of life, "He called me to his office and told me he's in Seattle. With Richard, He asked me if I was planning on telling him I was leaving or just pulling a disappearing act like my husband. " She paused, "He said it was no secret that Richard had always wanted me there, but he had expected me to at least show him the decency of informing him of my plans if I planned to move across the country. That I should be ashamed of myself for sending my husband to scoop things out and draft contracts. " Her voice wavered, "He is drafting a contract in Seattle. Seattle."

Marks voice caught in his throat, "What did you tell him?"

Addison took a deep breath, "I said I could never leave New York, no matter what the job offer. I couldn't tell him that... that whatever deal Derek is making, I'm not a part of it."

Mark exhaled slowly and stood up, "You should get inside it's getting cool."

She shook her head, "I can't go in there."

He extended his hand, "Come with me."

Addison closed her eyes for a moment, then raised her face to look at him. Slowly she reached out and took his hand, "Okay."

XXXX

"So after Derek left..."

"Addison moved in with me."

"But she..."

"Never loved me. By this point she didn't even really like me. She blamed me. I was her albatross."

Izzie looked at him sympathetically.

"And the Addison that only appeared when we were together, the scary empty Addison, that's all that there was left. The good Addison left with Derek."

"But..."

Mark smiled, "Since she came to Seattle, she's the good Addison again."

"Okay, Mark," Izzie chuckled, "Who are we rooting for here? 'Cause you seem to want Addison and Derek to continue their little tryst at the expense of my friend."

"It's a guilt thing."

XXXX

"Derek?" Meredith asked tentatively.

Derek looked up at her, his eye's heavy and blurry, "You shouldn't be here," he slurred unsteadily.

"Well neither should you," she stared at the table in front of him, "Did you drink the entire bottle?"

"I'm a bad person."

"No your not."

"Yes, I am." His words were barely understandable, "You don't see it 'cause I'm dreamy but i am a bad bad person."

Meredith smirked, "Your not so dreamy right now."

Derek slammed his fist down on the table, "You made me think I was dreamy!"

Meredith jumped back, "Okay. I'm sorry I said you were dreamy."

"I was never dreamy. I was Derek. And I liked being Derek. Derek was an okay guy. But then Mark..." Derek reached for his glass but Meredith pulled it out of his way, "Then Mark. Mark and Addison. ADDISON." he exclaimed angrily. Then his face changed, suddenly Meredith had the distinct feeling he might cry, "Addison," he repeated, "Addison. Addy. My Addy." he made a sweeping backhand gesture with his hand, and suddenly his head became to heavy to hold up and he dropped it to the table with a loud thud.

"Derek?" Meredith asked uncertainly.

Derek's head popped up, "Mark is evil. Mark is evil. I bought land. He made me McDreamy."

"What?" Meredith couldn't for the life of her understand what Derek was talking about, "Cristina named you McDreamy."

"Because of Mark!" Derek exclaimed triumphantly, "I need to see her."

"Cristina?"

Derek got unsteadily to his feet, "Have to... see... my keys."

"No keys for you buddy," she informed him as he wavered towards the door leading to the parking lot.

"She..." Derek looked around the parking lot, "Where is my car?"

"We are taking my car this time," she told him, opening the door and pushing him into the passenger seat.

Derek's head rolled against the head rest, "Where... I need..."

"I'm taking you home."

"Okay good," Derek agreed placidly, "I need to talk to Addy."

XXXX

Addison sat on the bed in the trailer. He had to come home sometime. She needed to reassure him.

She was never mad at him, she never resented him.

It wasn't;t his fault. He shouldn't blame himself.

What happened was as much her fault as it was his. Now he was off somewhere beating himself up, and there was nothing she could do about it.

She sighed and stood up.

Maybe he'd gone back to the house.

OOOO

"Derek, wait," Addison pulled the knot on her robe tighter, "I'm sorry."

Derek spun around enraged, "Sorry? Your sorry?" Derek raised his hand, tensely made a fist and turned around again, heading towards the door.

"Stop," Addison demanded, "You do not get to turn your back on me."

"Turn my back on you?" Derek yelled, right in her face, "You were FUCKING my best friend. I'm not turning my back on you, I'm walking out."

"You don't get to walk out on me," Addison shook her head"You don't get to walk out that door because things are not going your way. I NEEDED YOU. And I get it, I understand. You were busy. But I NEEDED you. And I'm SORRY that you walked in on that Derek, you have NO IDEA how sorry I am, but you KNOW, YOU KNOW, that it meant nothing."

"NOTHING? NOTHING?" Derek flung a stack of mail and magazines off a nearby table, "Mark is my BEST FRIEND. MY BEST FRIEND. BEST FRIENDS ARE OFF LIMITS ADDISON. I NEVER, EVER even DREAMED of going to one of YOUR friends."

"I'm SORRY DEREK. GOD. Would you just LISTEN to me. IT MEANT NOTHING."

"My best friend, Addison! None of them were your best friends! Not even anyone you knew," he paused, "Except..."

"Don't you dare," Addison warned evenly.

"Gayle."

"Gayle," Addison repeated, "My student nurse from 3 years ago. With the coloured contacts and the bleached hair. Gayle."

"Gayle." Derek replied icily, "You know that hotel 3 blocks from the hotel?"

"Actually, I do."

"Why am I not surprised."

"You SON OF A BITCH," Addison flew at him in a blind rage, her nails clawing at his skin.

Derek grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her away, chest heaving he wiped some blood off his jawbone.

"Did you get that out of your system?" Addison demanded, "Are we even now."

"Even?" Derek's eyes flashed, "We will NEVER BE EVEN. When you come home to see what I just saw, then we will be even. BUT THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN BECAUSE WE ARE DONE ADDISON. OVER."

"Over? You do not get to walk into this house after being COMPLETELY ABSENT FOR 5 DAYS AND JUST DECIDE THAT IT'S OVER. IF ANYONE SHOULD BE THINKING OF LEAVING IT SHOULD BE ME. YOUR A BAD HUSBAND DEREK. BUT YOU ARE MY BAD HUSBAND, SO YOU NEED TO GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL THAT THAT MAN UPSTAIRS MEANS NOTHING. HE IS NOTHING. You, you are the one that matters Derek. Your the one that I want to be with. Your the bad husband THAT I WANT."

"I am a bad husband. I'M A BAD HUSBAND. I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANTED ADDISON. I BOUGHT YOU THIS HOUSE. THOSE CLOTHES, THAT RIDICULOUS HOUSE IN THE HAMPTONS. I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING." Derek turned and grabbed a vase from the table behind him, "I bought you this vase. This ugly, ugly vase because you HAD to have it. THOUSANDS of dollars so that you could have THIS vase. And I got it for you because I would have gotten you anything, I would have gotten you TWO ugly vases if that's what you wanted," Derek threw the vase against the wall with all his strength, "AND YOU THANK ME BY SCREWING MY BEST FRIEND IN OUR BED. OUR BED. Where WE make love." Derek paused and pressed his palms to his eyes, trying to force back the tears, "You let someone else into our bed. I'M SORRY but to me that doesn't scream 'your the one i want to be with' TO ME." Derek turned and moved determinedly to the door.

"NO. You DO NOT get to walk out on me." Addison grabbed his arm and pulled with all her strength. She felt his arm give, falling out of it's joint rather then him relenting to her.

She felt a searing pain flash across her cheek and stumbled back, hitting the wall with a thud and sliding to the floor.

The room was motionless.

"Are you okay?" His voice was hard, but tears streamed down his face.

Addison didn't look up, she knew that there was no point, his back was to her, he couldn't bare the sight of her. She kept her face buried in her hands, "No."

Both remained still, neither sure what was the emotional pain and what was the physical.

"I'm leaving," Derek said finally.

Addison refused to let herself cry, "Are you coming back?"

Derek was silent, "I can't be near you."

"I'm sorry," she whisper, "I lo-"

"No!" Derek exclaimed. Spinning around he pulled her roughly to feet and pushed her back against the wall, his hands tight on her arms, "You do not get to say you love me."

Addison nodded, her head bowed her hair hiding her face.

Derek let go of her arms and she slumped slightly.

"If I ever see that man again, I'm going to kill him," he promised, closing the door behind him.

XXXX

What else could I be

All apologies

What else could I write

I don't wanna fight

What else could I say

All my words are gray

What else could I be

All apologies

In the sun

In the sun I feel as one

In the sun

In the sun

Married

Married

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

All in all is all we are

XXXXXXXXXX

Okay, I am not going to lie. I LOVE THIS CHAPTER. I do. I really do. The least of the reasons being Izzie saying "How do I tell one of my best friends that I ate breakfast while watching her boyfriend make out with his ex-wife up against a tree." I love that line.

Things are getting intense. Derek's feeling it, I don't know if anyone noticed but he is REALLY drunk. That may carry over into the next chapter. Just saying.

Random: Anyone pay attention to the flowers that Derek gave Addison and Meredith?

Review.