Chapter 12
Hiei was standing on the porch looking out into the woods. They had come up with a plan. Yusuke told him about the incident where Kurama almost showed himself after being provoked by him. So they wanted Hiei to push some buttons and see if he could get Kurama to emerge. Well, he did need to make Youko pay for his trick, thus he had a lot of buttons to push.
Getting ready to head out into the woods to find the fox, he was stopped by a voice.
"So it was you all along? You're Yukina's brother? I don't understand why you didn't tell her? I mean, she respects you and cares for you as a friend…and you lied to her." Kuwabara said softly, but was angry. How dare Hiei let Yukina go all these years, standing right in front of her and letting her go on and on about how much she missed her brother and wanted him by her side.
"I don't need to explain myself to you." Hiei said, not turning around.
"She wants to talk to you." Kuwabara said. "I don't know why, I wouldn't give you the time…." He didn't finish as he was slammed against the wall, a sword at his neck. Hiei's nostrils were flaring as he placed the blade at the boy's jugular.
"Would you want the forbidden one as your brother?" Hiei hissed.
"What does that have to do with anything?" Kuwabara said, not even blinking an eye. He's had the same sword at his neck many times and knew the fire demon would not hurt him.
"I don't expect you to understand." Hiei sighed, lowering his sword and turning away with guilt and hatred on his face.
"Explain it to me then." The orange haired said. "Kurama seems to love the forbidden one, so why can't his sister love him too."
Hiei was gone in a flash.
a)a)a)a
Damn, damn, damn. It was bad enough having to deal with his emotions over Kurama and the situation he was in, but now thanks to that damn fox, he had his sister to deal with as well. Someone's going to pay. Hiei landed in the clearing where he was last talking to the fox. Expecting to see the silver form, he was completely shocked to see the red head sitting on a fallen log.
Approaching cautiously, Hiei walked up to the figure. "Kurama?" He said softly, not wanting to frighten him.
"Uh." The red head turned and stood, surprise written all over his face. "Oh Hiei, you are back, um, I just came out here for some air. Are you hungry, we can head back to the apartment and I can make that special dinner." The red head spoke calmly, but was shaking ever so slightly. He was trying to hide it, which only made it worse.
Hiei sighed. He didn't need to be told that this wasn't Kurama, but the ningen boy. If he looked close enough, he could see that the eyes were not quite as green, they were dull and missing the sparks that he liked to see. The hair was also somewhat dull, not the rich blood, lush, that his fingers found enjoyable to run through, the hair was flat and faded.
"No that's okay…Shuiichi." Hiei said, relaxing his pose so as to not intimidate the boy. He saw a flicker of fear, but just like Kurama, it was gone in a blink of an eye, making you wonder if it had ever been there.
"Why are you calling me that? It is my ningen name, you never call me that." As hard as he tried, the red head could not keep his voice from cracking and he started backing up, trying to put distance between them.
"I'm not going to hurt you." Hiei said softly, walking towards the boy.
"You do not care for ningens, you are a demon." Shuiichi said, still walking backwards. He started tripping over roots, but was catching himself before he fell completely.
"I care for you." Hiei said. Gods he hated this, he was no good with his emotions, how the hell was he going to make the boy believe him?
"No." Red hair shaking. "You care for Kurama and you always called him weak because he showed emotions." Shuiichi said.
"I will admit I don't care for ningen emotions." Hiei said. "They can make you weak, but you are not weak, you have a great power…." He was cut off.
"You mean Youko has a great power and Kurama has some as well, but not me, I'm just a ningen." Shuiichi said, he'd stopped and was standing his ground.
"No…you are Kurama." Hiei said, also stopping.
"What." Shuiichi laughed. "Me, Kurama, I can't do the things he does, he doesn't show fear and has power to control plants and …" This time Hiei cut him off.
"You created Kurama to do all that because you were too young to understand at the time."
"I…did...me…What about Youko?" Shuiichi stuttered sitting down hard on the ground, his shaking returning.
Taking a seat as well, Hiei explained everything he knew about the spirit yoko and what he'd done.
Shuiichi didn't say anything as the news sank in. After a few minutes he said. "So you are telling me that I created Kurama to control Youko." He looked to the fire demon, who nodded.
"I don't know what to say." Shuiichi said, picking up a leaf and twirling it.
"I will tell you now that Youko wants to kill you and take control for good." Hiei said.
"I thought you said he could not do that because he would die." Shuiichi said, his eyes going wide.
Hiei answered softly. "He seems to think he can do it. I don't know if it was a threat in hopes that we would back off, or if he honestly thinks he can survive without you."
"What do I need to do?" Shuiichi said, his green eyes making direct contact with crimson.
"You need to mentally go into Youko's room and become one with his spirit." Hiei said standing.
"I…can…n't." Shuiichi also went to stand, but he knelt back down as the world began to spin.
"What's wrong?" Hiei said, quickly going over and knelling next to the boy.
"My head hurts…I." Shuiichi tried to say, but let out a moan before a scream pierced the air, making the birds take flight, the trees rustling at the vibration.
Hiei watched as a white mist formed and then Youko stood up, his glare causing Hiei to fear for his life as he tried to back away.
"Now that Kurama is gone, the boy can not stop me from coming out." He smirked.
"He will beat you." Hiei said, drawing his sword.
"Oh, I do not think so." Youko smirked while reaching into his hair and pulling out a rose.
"You can't kill him." Hiei said, taking a defensive stance.
"Why not, I am stronger than him and can now keep my true form." Youko said then called his whip.
"You can not keep it when you sleep, thus you will die as well." Hiei stated as he started moving around the fox, still keeping his distance.
"That is only a small problem, if he is gone, I will be able to be out all the time." Youko said, turning with the smaller figure, keeping him in his sight.
"Are you willing to take that risk?" Hiei asked.
"You have already said you do not care for me." Youko said with some hurt in his voice. "Kurama is gone and you have no reason to love the ningen boy. Maybe I will end my life and put an end to it all." He said.
"You are too vain for that, you are still greedy." Hiei said, stopping. "You took over the body of a fetus to survive, what makes you think I'll believe you now."
"No flower of fortune has blessed a life resembling a long-buried tree – yet how bitter is the thought that all should end like this." Youko said, looking up at the setting sun.
"What the hell you babbling about?" Hiei growled, he made to strike and only hit air as the fox jumped back at the last second.
"Why did I seek to make it longer – this life that brings only pain?" Youko said softly as he jumped back.
"What are you talking about?" Hiei growled again, he was getting very angry, his energy flaring.
"You asked me once if Kurama ever taught me anything.'Patience'…that is what he taught me." The spirit yoko said softly, looking at the ground in sadness. "All those years being cooped up, nothing to do, not being able to show my true self and always having to do his bidding. Is that a life I wanted?" He smirked. "No, it was not. I wanted to be reborn and go back to the Makai, but it was not meant to be. Now that I think about it, there is nothing to go back to the Makai for. Kuronue is gone…he was the only one I lived for." He muttered.
"Like I believe you cared for him." Hiei spat.
"I came to care for him deeply." Youko said, his gold eyes looking at the fire demon. "As I told you. He was the only one to mount me. I have come to care for you as well. I let you mount me, and that, you should consider an honor." He said, striking with his whip, which Hiei dodged and tried to cut, but couldn't.
"I consider it an honor with Kurama, not you." Hiei stated and went to strike, but faked a swing with his sword as Youko went to block it. He struck with the hilt and hit the fox in the mid section.
Letting out an 'oof' as the air left his lungs, Youko staggered back and crouched down, breathing heavily. Hiei backed off and held his stance.
The yoko pounced and landed on the fire demon, pinning him. Hiei struggled and tried to get his sword between them, but Youko held and because of his larger body was able to stop any struggle.
"Tell me, little one, can he give you what I have been able to?" He purred, licking the smaller figure's neck and face.
"Stop it…get off." Hiei warned and tried to push again, to no avail.
Youko tore clothes and had all but Hiei's shorts off, when the fire demon started raising his energy, making it hot.
"Damn you." Youko growled, pushing away as he was burned on his hands and arms.
"I told you to get off." Hiei growled, getting up and grabbing his cloak to throw over his bare frame.
He turned to see Youko crouched in a ball on the ground, holding his arms and whimpering. The fire demon brought his sword up and held it to the fox's neck.
"I should kill you for that little trick you pulled with Yukina." He said, holding the blade at an angle so he could nick the skin.
"Did she reject you?" Youko said softly, then his voice started chuckling and he said. "Did she do what you always feared...tell you she will not have the forbidden one as her brother and wish that it was anyone else but you." He ended in an all out laughing fit, not even looking up at the fire demon for his reaction.
Hiei went to raise the sword, but stopped dead when he saw green in the golden eyes.
"Kurama?" He whispered, hesitating.
"Do it…please…just kill me." The red head pleaded. "I do not want to have to fight him anymore." He whimpered as tears formed in the corners of his eyes.
"I can't do that." Hiei muttered, dropping his sword and falling to his knees in front of the fox.
"Why, I never expected you to accept me…I." Hiei cut him off.
"Kurama…look at me." He said softly and waited until the mixed eyes looked at him before continuing. "I will only ever tell you this. Meeting you has changed my life. You have opened my eyes to so many things, including understanding my emotions. I realize now, that I can't change my past. You taught me that. So now I want a future and I want that with you Kurama, ningen emotions and all." He said, sitting back on his rear.
"I can give you all you need if you stay with me." Youko's voice broke through.
"I don't want you Youko. I do not care for you. I'm no longer like that, I've changed." Hiei said.
"I see…well then I guess there is truly nothing left for me." Youko said and his eyes rolled as he slumped over.
"Kurama!" Hiei yelled, running over and pulling the figure into his arms. He started shaking the limp form and running his hands through the fox's hair.
Panic sat in, the fox was breathing, but showing no signs of awareness. Taking the cover off his jagan, Hiei closed his eyes and plunged into the fox's mind.
A scream echoed over the forest, causing the three figures sitting inside the temple to run to the source. When they located the source, they saw two figures huddle together, laying slumped on the ground.
"What happened?" Yusuke asked as he went over to check on them, noticing the red head was back and Hiei had his hand in his hair.
"That was Hiei who screamed." Kuwabara said, also coming over to check.
Genkai noticed the cover was gone from Hiei's jagan. "Hiei must have tried to read the fox's mind." She said.
"What?" Yusuke looked over the fire demon.
"Let's get them back to the temple." She said.
Yusuke picked up the red head, while Kuwabara picked up the fire demon and they headed back to the temple.
a)a)a)a
Hiei's head was swimming with images. Images of his time with Kurama and he realized these scenes were from the red head's point of view. He saw scenes from the time they met, to the dark tournament, then onto Sensui and Yomi. He felt everything the fox felt in all those situation. Fear, anger, sadness, love, happiness, it was to much for him to process and he tried to clear his mind. Though he felt these emotions, he noticed that they never showed on the red head's face, he had kept them lock inside, afraid to show them for fear that something would be said.
The others watched as Hiei began to moan and shake his head. A single tear went down the side of his cheek, turning into a white gem as it hit the floor.
"He can cry tear gems?" Kuwabara whispered, as Yukina reached over and picked it up.
"Yes, he is koorime, but look here." She said and held the pearl up to the light, showing a black spot in the middle. "His are not as pure as mine. His will have flaws, because of his other half." She told him.
Genkai saw red eyes open and take in their surroundings. They landed on her. "Welcome back. That was a stupid thing you did." She said, watching as the small demon sat up and grab his head.
"Where's….." Hiei said, but was cut off.
"Look beside you." She said.
Hiei looked to the figure beside him and let out an emotional sigh.
"He's alive, we just need to wait and see if his mind's intact." Genkai said and got up to leave. "Come you all. Let them rest."
"What about…" Yusuke said getting up.
"All we have is time." She said, holding the door for the others.
Hiei watched them leave and as soon as the door closed, he scooped the red head up in his arms and held him in a death grip. Taking a hand, he started running it through the red….wait…it was blood, lush, but with streaks of silver highlights…is this Kurama. 'What the hell is going on in that head of yours, fox.' He thought, pulling the figure even closer and placing his head on the other's shoulder. Closing his eyes, he for the first time, that he could remember, began to pray.
a)a)a)a
Sometime later the door slid open and Yukina came in with a tray of food.
"I thought you might be hungry, any change." She said as she placed the tray on the floor and went to her knees to serve the tea.
"No change." Hiei said as he watched her. He was still holding the red head and wasn't going to let him go until he woke.
"May I say something?" Yukina said, not looking up as she placed food on a plate.
When she didn't get an answer she looked up and continued.
"I am so happy that you are my brother. I should have realized it, the signs were obvious." She said softly, placing her hands on her knees and waiting.
"What makes you say that?" Hiei said.
"I hear more than people realize, talk about the forbidden one, how no one would want him as a brother. I just didn't realize all the talk was about you." She said, looking down. He watched as her hand went to the necklace, fingering it.
"I'm sorry, this is yours." She suddenly said, removing the necklace and holding it out.
Hiei held up a hand. "No, you keep it…I have no use for it." He said, but then saw the sadness on her face. "Please keep it for me, I would feel honored if you held onto it." He said.
"Then you must keep mine and wear it close to your heart." She said and got up to leave.
"Yukina." He said, stopping her at the door. "When this is over…I would…." He paused. 'Damn these emotions.'
"Yes." She turned.
"The wedding…I would like to hear what you have planned for the wedding." He basically spilled the sentence out.
"Yes, of course." She said and left with a smile on her face, leaving him holding the red head.
End Chapter 12
Lyrics to the song: Figure.09 – by: Linkin Park
Nothing ever stops all these thoughts and the pain attached to them. Sometimes I wonder why this is happening. It's like nothing I can do would distract me when I think of how I shot myself in the back again. Cause from the infinite words I can say I put all you gave to me on display, but didn't realize instead of setting it free I took what I hated and made it a part of me.
(Never goes away…never goes away)
(Course)
And now you've become a part of me…you'll always be right here…you've become a part of me…you'll always be my fear…I can't separate…myself from what I've done…giving up a part of me…I've let myself become you.
Hearing your name the memories come back again. I remember when it started happening. I see you n' every thought I had and then the thoughts slowly found words attached to them and I knew as they escaped away. I was committing myself to em' n' everyday. I regret saying those things cause now I see that I took what I hated and made it a part of me.
(Get away from me) Give me my space back you gotta just (go) Everything comes down the memories of (you) I kept it in without letting you (know) I let you go so get away from (me) Everything comes down to the memories of (you) I kept it in without letting you (know) I let you go.