Notes:
Well a few of you figured out what book Lorelai was reading at the end of the last chapter, but for those of you who asked, she was reading Goodnight Moon.
squiddrude - Yeah, the Indians. You and my family, although it's not that good of year to be an Indians fan I guess.
pixiechick12 - Thank you. Yes, it was daring for me not to go 'oh they have babies and ladida happiness', I'm appreciative of you and all who liked the path that I chose. I thought it was a story that needed to be told.
purtyinpink71121 - I've said a few times but there is an end, not for quite a few chapters. I'm considering the possibility of a sequel but we will see.
Hmmmm... the line thing doesn't seem to be working so I'll make my own...
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Luke and Lorelai's House
Lorelai closes the book and lays her head on Luke's shoulder. Luke turns his face to kiss the top of her head. "It should be like this forever," Lorelai wishes softly.
"It can be. Us. You, me, Olivia, Liam, Rory and April. This forever," Luke tells her. Lorelai grins.
"That's not what I meant. I want them to be this little forever. All they want is to love us and to be loved by us. It's so simple."
"It is," Luke agree. He sniffs. "Jeez, but then they do that." He wrinkles his nose, moving his face back from the child in his lap. Lorelai laughs.
"Are you disgusted by our son's bathroom habits?" Lorelai teases. Luke gives her a look. Lorelai laughs again. "Okay, okay, I'll take care of it." Lorelai slowly gets on her knees and stands, Olivia still in her arms.
"Boy am I glad you came back." Lorelai shakes her head.
"Well I'm not imprinting slave on my forehead, so don't think you're never going to have change a diaper," Lorelai informs Luke, who finally stands up. He lays Liam on the changing table. "Where are the diapers?" Lorelai glances around, putting Olivia down in her crib.
"Oh, I ran out and Anna went out and grabbed me some more. I think she shoved them in the closet," Luke realizes. He goes into the closet and grabs big bag of diapers. Lorelai raises an eyebrow as she puts the wipes on the table.
"So Anna was a big help while I was gone," Lorelai notes. Luke sighs, shrugging. Lorelai smiles. "It's okay. It's actually nice to know that you couldn't handle it on your own, makes me feel less incompetent." Luke chuckles.
"Yeah, I don't know what I would have done without Lane, Anna, April and Babette."
"Well I'm going to give them all gold stars next time I see them."
"I'm sure they'd like that more than a box of chocolates," Luke teases. Lorelai shakes her head as she changes Liam's diaper.
"Okay one down. Switch," Lorelai says, pressing down the last tab on the diaper. Luke picks up Olivia, putting her on the changing table, and Lorelai puts Liam in his crib. Luke glances over at Lorelai. She stares at him and then gasps. Lorelai reaches up and draws the letters S-L-A-V-E on her forehead with her pointer finger.
"I knew it," Luke jokes. Lorelai shakes her head.
"Okay, but be prepared to watch a master at work. When Rory was a baby, I got so good, I could change it in 5 seconds flat," Lorelai boasts, quickly changing Olivia. "There, all done, Sweets," Lorelai says, kissing Olivia on the forehead. She lifts Olivia off of the table and places her in her crib. Then Lorelai glances at Luke. "So do we sing?" Lorelai asks. Luke raises an eyebrow, an uneasy look on his face.
"Sing?" he asks with distaste. Lorelai folds her arms across her chest, pursing her lips, thinking.
"Oh!" she realizes and runs out of the room. Luke has a look of alarm on his face, but shrugs. He bends down and puts the book back on the shelf. Lorelai walks back in holding the gift that Chris gave her.
"What's that?" Luke asks.
"I think it's…" Lorelai rips the bow off and puts it on Luke's head, winking. Then she rips the wrapping paper off of the gift. "Yes!" Lorelai grins. Luke reaches out and takes the CD case out of her hand.
"Bono sings the lullabies," Luke reads. He glances over at Lorelai, wrinkling his nose, but Lorelai's eyes are bright and excited.
"Yeah! He recorded this when Alison was pregnant with Elijah in '99. I must have mentioned it to Christopher," Lorelai tells Luke.
"Christopher?" Luke repeats, confused. Lorelai blushes.
"Yeah… well… I kinda stopped over at Christopher's on my way to New Hampshire," Lorelai admits. Luke raises an eyebrow. "Nothing happened. I'm not even sure why I went there. We just talked and he gave me this." Lorelai shrugs, as if it's not a big deal. Luke shakes his head. "He just wanted to give this to the twins."
"I can't believe… you went there? After the last time?" Luke asks, struggling to understand Lorelai's actions. He rubs his forehead, stepping away from her. Lorelai presses her lips together, a little embarrassed.
"Luke…" Lorelai tries to look at him, but the worry in her eyes, keeps her from actually looking into his eyes. Luke shakes his head, holding up a hand.
"Let's just…" He waves a hand over at Liam's crib. Lorelai nods slowly. She takes the CD from Luke and opens it, putting the CD in the CD player. Luke walks over to Olivia's crib. "Sweet dreams, Baby Girl," Luke says gruffly, touching Olivia's hand. Then he walks over to Liam's crib and squeezes his son's foot. "Stay strong, Kiddo." Then Luke glances at Lorelai coldly, and walks out of the nursery.
Lorelai sighs. Forlornly, she walks over to Liam's crib. Touching her fingers to her lips, she touches Liam's head. "I love you Liam, I always have." Then she walks over to Olivia's cribs and repeats her actions to Olivia. Finally she walks over to the light switch and flips it. "I'll be back later to check on you. I'll never leave again," Lorelai promises. She grabs the baby monitor and walks out.
Lorelai scratches the back of her head, preparing herself for the upcoming discussion. Adjusting her clothes, Lorelai takes a deep breath and walks downstairs to find Luke pacing in the living room. "Luke?" Lorelai calls. He stops in his tracks and looks up at her as she stops at the bottom of the stairs.
"Did you sleep with him?" Luke asks. Lorelai gives him a wide-eyed stare.
"What?" Lorelai asks, in shock.
"Did you sleep with him?" Luke repeats.
"Luke!"
"I'm serious, Lorelai, did you sleep with him?"
"Of course I didn't sleep with him! I told you nothing happened," Lorelai insists. Luke shrugs. "You don't believe me?"
"I'm not sure that I can," Luke explains.
"Excuse me?"
"It's not like it hasn't happened before."
"I've never cheated on you!" Lorelai exclaims.
"But you did cheat on him. You cheated on him with me. How do I know this doesn't go both ways?"
"Because it doesn't, Luke, it doesn't."
"Yeah, but how do I know that?" Luke goes back to pacing. Lorelai scoffs, twisting her hair in her fingers. "You know, I was going to make this big apology because when Anna and April came over to help me out, Anna kissed me."
"She kissed you!" Lorelai exclaims.
"Yeah, she kissed me," he responds, putting emphasis on 'she'. "I didn't kiss her, in fact I pushed her away from me. I thought I'd tell you the story and we'd laugh about it, about how crazy she was to try to kiss a guy who's committed to someone else. But that someone else isn't committed."
"I am, you just gotta trust me," Lorelai responds.
"I can't. He only found out that you cheated on him because Jess has a big mouth. You lied to him for months. You just wanted to go on as if nothing had happened between us and just lie to him for the rest of your life. You wanted to continue letting him believe he had won the princess. Cuts both ways, Lorelai." Lorelai furrows her eyebrows.
"Okay, Gloria Estefan, but I'm not lying this time," Lorelai repeats. Luke shakes his head. "I can't believe you don't believe me."
"You were never going to tell Christopher, Lorelai! You can claim all you want that you were, but you were never going to. It took him beating you to get you to tell the truth!"
"Fine, Luke! Go ahead. Take a swing at me. Choke me. Shove me against the wall!" Lorelai screams. Luke stops, staring at her, amazed that she would say something like this, not knowing how to react. "Come on Luke, if that's the only way you think you're going to get the truth out of me," Lorelai baits him. They glare at each other. "I'm telling you the truth," Lorelai states coldly.
"Lorelai, I just don't feel like I can trust you," Luke admits. Lorelai sighs.
"I didn't cheat on you. I would never cheat on you," Lorelai maintains.
"But how do I know that? How can I be sure?" Luke asks.
"We're getting married, we're engaged."
"You were engaged to Christopher," Luke reminds Lorelai.
"But we have kids together."
"And you and Christopher had Rory." Lorelai presses her lips together. "Tell me Lorelai, tell me how it's different this time," Luke begs. Lorelai looks away, twisting her hands in front of her. "Tell me how our relationship is different from the one you had with Max or Christopher." Lorelai shrugs. Luke shakes his head.
"It is," Lorelai whispers.
"But why do you know that?"
"Because… because, I…" Lorelai presses her lips together, unable to get the words out. Luke shakes his head.
"It's no different. You'll never change. You'll always be the 16 year old girl who got knocked up just to have someone with her always. You'll always be the 17 year old who ran away from her problems instead of facing them. You'll always be the egotistical, self-absorbed, immature child that I've always known," Luke says. Lorelai's tongue presses into her cheek as she listens to Luke's hurtful words. "And you'll never change. You'll never mature. And your children will always be more mature than you. They'll always be the adults in the relationship." At this final statement, Lorelai's eyes narrow, unable to swallow this last statement from Luke.
"Get. Out," Lorelai spits out, pointing towards the door. Luke shakes his head.
"You don't have to tell me twice," Luke responds coldly. He walks to the front door and slams it behind him, not looking back once.
Lorelai slowly walks over to the window, from where she watches Luke angrily get in his truck and drive off. Falling to her knees, Lorelai presses her eyes closed and she shake. "Dammit!" she cries, her hands covering her face as she's wracked with sobs. The door slamming woke the twins and they begin screaming upstairs. And Lorelai is all alone again. With the babies upstairs crying. And she is crumpled over her knees sobbing.