THE LAST CHAPTER!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!! ::dies:: Yeah, this it, and I mean it this time…
Just got back from the Godsmack and Breaking Benjamin concert at Louisville Gardens… It kicked my ass!! Soooo great… And it's also helped me a bit to make the performances in this chapter better. Can't go too in-depth, but it's still helped…
HaPpY HaLloWeeN
Disclaimer: The characters of Gravitation belong to Maki Murakami-sama and not me…::sighs::…the song "Like You" belongs to Evanescence, "I'm Movin' On" belongs to Rascal Flatts, and "Broken Wings" belongs to Flyleaf…
In Love and Hate…
This was where he belonged, where he'd always belonged. On the stage of a Tokyo clubhouse with hundreds, maybe even close to a thousand, people screaming for him to sing his heart out. Sweat was dripping from every pore of his body, soaking his clothes and sneaking into his eyes. The bright lights that beat down on him and the other band members blinded him and made the crowd look like a blurred mass of multicolor blobs.
As Hiro and Ben played out the end of "Light With a Sharpened Edge" and Suguru carefully blended opening of "Like You" into it, Shuichi closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The screams of the fans were like a drug. He fed from them as he started to sing.
"Stay low
Soft, dark, and dreamless
Far beneath my nightmares and loneliness
I hate me
For breathing without you
I don't want to feel anymore for you.
Grieving for you
I'm not grieving for you
Nothing real love can't undo
And though I may have lost my way
All paths lead straight to you
I long to be like you
Lie cold in the ground like you…"
Shuichi sighed and opened his eyes, letting them drift over the crowd. So many people…so many fans who knew the difficulties Bad Luck had gone through and conquered over their four years absence…so many people who had stood behind them and held them up when they thought everything was a lost cause. So many people…
"…Halo
Blinding wall between us
Melt away and leave us alone again
Humming, haunted somewhere out there
I believe our love can see us through in death
I long to be like you
Lie cold in the ground like you
There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you
I'm coming for you…"
Singing "Like You" in front of so many people for the first time sent a chill down Shuichi's back. This song meant so much to not only him, but the band as a whole as well. He hoped that, somewhere out there, Aimee was sitting with her eyes closed and a small smile on her while she listened to him singing for her. It would only make the song that much more meaningful.
"…You're not alone
No matter what they told you, you're not alone
I'll be right beside you forevermore.
I long to be like you, Sis
Lie cold in the ground like you did
There's room inside for two
and I'm not grieving for you
And as we lay in silent bliss
I know you remember me
I long to be like you
Lie cold in the ground like you
There's room inside for two
and I'm not grieving for you
I'm coming for you."
Shuichi sighed and glanced behind him at the image projected on the screen behind the band. With a sad smile on his face, he held his head strong and nodded at the haunting face.
"You're not alone, Aimee," he muttered into the microphone, eliciting a loud cheer from the crowd. "You're not alone. We love you."
The crowd erupted into screams and Shuichi grinned like a madman.
"Now who's ready to rock?!" he screamed. The crowd's screams grew louder. "Let's do it!" he shouted and the band went into their next song, "Soundeffects and Overdramatics."
During the rest of their performance, Shuichi would glance back at Suguru, Ben, and Hiro and smile at them. They looked like he felt. They were finally at home and at peace in some sort of way.
When the music stopped and they had to leave the stage for Nittle Grasper's performance, Shuichi felt like his life was taken away from him, but he knew that it was going to come back. He still had the encore performance with Ryuichi to look forward to, and thirty more concerts spread across Japan. The American tour had yet to be planned.
Shuichi was glomped to the ground by Ryuichi on his way off the stage, who told him that he was totally awesome and that he didn't think that he would be able to measure up to his performance. Shuichi shoved him off with a blush and watched as Ryuichi was all but dragged onto the stage by Touma and Noriko.
He turned to the other members of Bad Luck with a chuckle. "Well…we did it, guys. How do you feel?"
Ben was grinning from ear to ear. "That was a hella show!" he shouted. "We kicked some major ass tonight!"
"I agree," Suguru added next. "We definitely proved that we hadn't grown old in our absence. I think that was what the fans were looking for all along."
Hiro nodded. "Totally."
Shuichi grinned and turned his attention to Ryuichi and the band as they started their second song. He recognized it immediately and was glad that they had decided to add it to their album. The song wasn't Ryuichi's typical style, but it was healing for what had happened with Tatsuha, as "Like You" was Shuichi's healing for what had happened with Aiko.
"I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long
I'm movin' on
I've lived in this place and I know all the faces
Each one is different, but they're always the same
They mean me no harm, but it's time that I face it
They'll never allow me to change
But I never dreamed home would end up where I don't belong
I'm movin' on…"
The only music that accentuated the song was piano and violins, which were played by Touma and Noriko on the synths, both looking sad but stoic at the same time. Ryuichi's face, on the other hand, shined with emotion that spilled over into the crowd. Most of the fans had pulled out their lighters and small candle flames of light waved back and forth to the music.
"…I'm moving on
At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me
And I know there's no guarantee, but I'm not alone
There comes a time in everyone's life
When all you can see are the years passing by
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone
I've sold what I could and packed what I couldn't
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town
I've loved like I should, but lived like I shouldn't
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I'm movin' on
I'm movin' on
I'm movin' on."
The song ended with a deafening roar of approval from the crowd and a large smile bloomed across Ryuichi's face as he opened his eyes.
"Thank you! You guys are awesome!" he shouted into the microphone and Touma and Noriko kicked it up with the beginning of their next song.
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Shuichi stopped paying attention to what was going on around him halfway through Nittle Grasper's performance. He tried paying attention, but there was so much hustle and bustle that he was lose track of what he was trying to pay attention to because he would be distracted by something else. The roar of the crowd as only a small buzz in his ears.
A gentle tap on his shoulder pulled him back into reality, though. He blinked and shook his head, looking to the side to see Hiro sitting next to him with a smile on his face. He returned the smile with a sigh.
"So…what do you think? Has it been what you expected?"
Shuichi laughed and nodded. "Better than what I expected. The fans are great."
"They always are," Hiro said. "It did surprise me how many showed up, though. I was expecting most of them to have forgotten about us, but K says that the next ten of our shows are already sold out and the rest are well on their ways to being the same."
"Awesome."
Hiro laughed and did a little dance with his fingers. "Hurrah for one word sentences," he joked.
Shuichi laughed and shook his head, but started to dance with him anyway. "Hurrah for making it back into the big time! Hurrah for happiness!"
"Hurrah just for the sake of saying hurrah!"
Shuichi turned his attention to the new person and laughed when he saw Ben doing the finger dance along with them. The brunet American stopped the dance with a laugh when he noticed Shuichi watching him.
"It looked like fun so I thought I would join in," he said with a shrug and took a seat on the floor in front of Shuichi and Hiro.
Suguru soon joined them, plopping down into a chair with a heavy sigh. "I'm exhausted. Can't we just skip the encore?" he moaned.
"Suguru wants to skip out and leave early?!" Ben shouted and jumped back with a hand over his heart. "Someone call a doctor! I think our little Sugie-chan is sick!"
Suguru rolled his eyes and glared at Ben. "Would you shut up?! And stop calling me that! For gods sakes, I'm not a child."
Ben answered him with a big cheesy smile and turned his attention back onto Hiro and Shuichi. "Sooooo…how are we doing, my friends? All good?"
"Great," they said in unison and broke out in laughter.
"Oh…shpookyness." Ben waved his hands in front of his face like he was casting some kind of weird spell and Suguru kicked him in the knee. He turned toward the green-haired man with a pout on his face. "Why are you so mean to me, Suguru-kun? I never did anything to you!"
Suguru stood up from the chair and shook his head. "I can't deal with this! You are almost thirty years old. Start acting like it!"
"Psh…thirty's old and I'm not old. I'm a spring chicken and I'm still fuckin' kickin', yo!" Ben said, crossing his arms over his chest like a rapper.
"Wow…" Shuichi said with a small laugh.
Hiro nodded. "Yeah, that about sums it up for me too…"
Ben laughed, but silenced himself as K and Sakano strode into the area. The blonde caught sight of the band mates immediately and dragged Sakano over to where they were bickering playfully.
"You're all prepared for the encore, I take it?" K said and crossed his arms over his chest, where his hand would have usually been resting on the butt of his gun. They were still getting adjusted to seeing K without his shoulder holster unless he was wearing an overcoat.
They all nodded.
"We've been prepared for the encore for the past three days, K," Ben muttered and sat back so all of his weight was resting on his arms. "Besides, Shu always does better when he's unprepared so I don't see why you'd be worried if we weren't."
K glared at Ben, his blue eyes boring holes into the other American's face. Ben made a small "meep"ing sound and immediately shut his mouth. K smiled. He may not have been able to carry his guns out in the open any longer, but he still had his intimidating stance to help him. No one wanted ever wanted to mess with K…unless they were Shuichi or Ben, of course, but he usually got his revenge sooner or later.
"Shuichi may do better when he's unprepared, but it's better to be prepared so we know what to expect. For once, we want everything to go as planned. Is that too much to ask for?"
Shuichi smiled. "Don't worry, K. I'm wide awake, healthy, and excited. I don't foresee any unplanned collapsing or any other unfortunate events taking place today."
"That's just the thing…they're always unplanned," Sakano muttered under his breath.
"Like you're any better, Sakano," Ben said with a smile, and the rest of the band, even Suguru and K, broke out into laughter while the producer hung his head.
"Now, now, Ben. It's been months since Sakano's last fainting and manic spell. We'll celebrate that at the party tonight with a big toast!" Shuichi laughed. "He deserves it."
Sakano smiled and fixed his glasses on his nose as Ryuichi ran into the room.
"Shu-chan!!!" he exclaimed and jumped onto the raven-haired singer. "Weren't we so totally awesome! That was so much fun!"
"Come on, Ryu…" Noriko scolded as she pulled Ryuichi away from Shuichi.
"Yeah…you were great," Shuichi said as he gulped down air. "Totally awesome."
Ryuichi beamed and bounced back and forth on his feet. "I can't wait for the encore to start and the after party. I can't sit still. It's been so long since we've had a concert. I forgot how good it feels."
"Well, I think we're getting our chance right now…" K muttered.
Shuichi looked where the manager was looking and saw a blonde stagehand running into the area, a clipboard held tightly in her hand.
"Bad Luck and Nittle Grasper. The stage is ready for your encore in thirty seconds."
"YES!" Ryuichi jumped in the air and twirled around in a circle. "Come on!!"
Shuichi jumped up from the couch and linked elbows with Ryuichi. The two of them made a run for it toward the entrance to the stage while the others followed at a quick walk.
The stage was completely black when they walked out. Hiro situated himself behind the guitar and Ben behind the drums, while Touma, Noriko, and Suguru got comfortable behind their synthesizers. Ryuichi and Shuichi stood to the side offstage until Hiro started the open notes on his guitar.
"You all ready for one more?!" Shuichi shouted as they made their way onto the stage.
The crowd replied with a loud roar.
"This song is by Flyleaf. It's called 'Broken Wings.'" Ryuichi shouted.
The crowd replied with an even louder roar as Shuichi lifted the microphone to his lips and began to sing.
"Thank you for being such a friend to me
Oh I pray a friend for life,
And have I ever told you how much you mean to me?
Oh you mean so much to me..."
Shuichi's words faded out and Ryuichi started to sing.
"…I'm thinking all the time how to tell you what I feel,
I'm contemplating phrases...
I'm gazing at eternity...
I am floating in serenity..."
The band kicked up and Ryuichi and Shuichi shouted the short chorus into their microphones over the screams of the fans in the audience.
"…And I am so lost for words
And I am so overwhelmed …"
Shuichi started the next verse, but was replaced by Ryuichi after two lines. They joined together again to belt out the chorus.
"…Please don't go just yet
Can you stay a moment, please?
We can dance together
We can dance forever
Under your stars tonight
We'll live and breathe this dream…"
There was a short interlude where the band kicked it up and Ryuichi and Shuichi were aloud to catch their breath and dance around the stage. When they started singing again, Shuichi started and they traded off until they joined together again and screamed out the last line.
"…So close your eyes, but don't dream too deep
And please pass me some memories
And when I fall you're underneath
A dozen broken hearts,
Carried by a dozen broken wings."
Shuichi fell to his knees and screamed into the microphone. Ryuichi hummed quietly while Hiro, Ben, Suguru, Noriko, and Touma played out the rest of the song. As the song ended, Shuichi slid across the stage and air guitared the last note.
The audience erupted into wild screams of satisfaction and Ryuichi and Shuichi joined hands as they doubled over in a deep bow.
"You guys kick ass!" Shuichi said as they straightened up.
"Yeah! You're awesome. Thanks for coming out tonight!"
"We'll see you soon!" they said in unison and gave on last small bow before exiting the stage.
The backstage area seemed to be eerily silent compared to the loud noises of the instruments and screams of the fans.
Shuichi collapsed onto the ground and put a hand under his bangs to hold them away from his forehead, his breathing heavy in his chest. Ryuichi sat down on the ground beside and smiled down upon him.
"That was freakin' awesome," he said. His brilliant blue eyes were shining with happiness and content, like it had been the best thing to happen to him in a while.
Actually, it had been the best thing to happen to any of them since Aimee's death.
"Yeah," Shuichi agreed. "It was great…"
"Dude! We kicked so many different kinds of ass tonight that it should be illegal!" Ben shouted as he and the rest of the group finally made it to the area where they had started.
Shuichi laughed. "Precisely how many different kinds of ass are there, Benjamin?"
The large American stuck his tongue out at Shuichi and did a little jig around the area to let out more of his never-ending supply of pent-up energy. Shuichi laughed and turned his attention to the others.
"That was amazing," Touma said, a content smile on his face. "I haven't felt this alive since Rue was born."
Hiro held a hand out to Shuichi, who took it gratefully, and pulled the raven-haired man up from the ground. It seemed that everyone else was at a loss for words, but their happiness shined in their eyes just like it had in Ryuichi's.
"Now it's…party time!!!!" Ben shouted and wrapped an arm around Shuichi's neck, pulling him close. "We get to get drunk and have even more fun. Whoo-hoo!"
Shuichi laughed and pried Ben's arm away from his neck. "Yeah. Let's go. Eiri and the others are waiting for us at the bar."
He led the way out of the clubhouse and to the large van they had all traveled to the concert in. The scents and sounds of a late night at a dance club were calling out to all of them…
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Flashing strobe lights... Wild and untamed techno beats that shook the floor beneath the dancers' feet… It had been far too long since he had been out to a club and actually had fun with it. Shuichi had his arms draped around Eiri's neck with the blonde's hands on his hips as they moved together provocatively on the dance floor. Their eyes were closed and sweat dripped from every pore in their bodies, the scent of it mixing with that of the other dancers around them.
Eiri's mouth suddenly closed over Shuichi's and he didn't try to hold himself back. Their tongues combined in a dance that made their stance even more provocative. Shuichi continued to move and rub his body against Eiri's. The blonde wedged a knee between his lover's legs and applied pressure, and Shuichi gasped into his mouth, his eyes flashing open only to roll back in his head as he was overcome with need.
They parted for breath and Eiri's mouth began to attack the flesh of Shuichi's neck while his hands wandered down and rested on his ass. Shuichi arched into his mouth and buried a hand in the hair at the base of Eiri's neck; his other hand dipped under the hem of his shirt and danced teasingly along his spine.
"Shuichi, we have to stop," Eiri whispered, his breath tickling the skin of Shuichi's ear.
Shuichi's loud moan was lost over the sound of the loud music. He didn't want to stop, but he knew that they were reaching the point of no return and he didn't want to fall in there yet. He wanted to save that for later.
The throbbing beats ended and Shuichi led Eiri away from the dance floor and toward the bar. Ben, Hiro and Suguru were already there, throwing down shots to prove who had the higher alcohol tolerance. It seemed that Ben had been telling the truth when he said that he could really hold his drink. Hiro was already red-faced and Suguru's words were beginning to slur.
"Hey, guys," Shuichi said with a smile, his hand held tightly in Eiri's.
"Shuichi!" Hiro beckoned him toward him and wrapped an arm around Shuichi's shoulders. "Did I ever tell you that you're my bestest friend ever and I love you? I don't know what I would ever do without you." He giggled and threw down another shot of whiskey.
Ben laughed. "Yeah, Shu. You're his bestest friend ever."
Shuichi rolled his eyes and shrugged off Hiro's shoulder. The long-haired guitarist then turned his attention to the blonde who stood behind his friend.
"And I was soooooo wrong about you, Eiri-san. You are a good man…a very good man and I'm glad that Shuichi has someone like you to take care of him. I dunno where he would be if it wasn't for you. But…you're a goooood man…" He gave them a cheesy smile and his eyes crossed. "You're lucky to have each other…don't let go or I'll have to kick your asses."
"I'd like to see you try," Eiri laughed and waved down a bartender. He ordered their drinks while Shuichi continued to talk with to the other three.
"How long did it take him to get like this?" he asked Ben.
The American laughed. "Um…three shots of vodka and seven of whiskey, if that means anything," he said with a large smile. "The more he drinks, the funnier he gets. Suguru just got quieter."
Shuichi chanced a glance at the keyboardist. He was staring blankly ahead while Hiro hung all over him, mumbling something only Suguru could hear. The redness on the green-haired man's cheeks grew darker, and Shuichi smiled. Suguru hadn't taken down anything since he'd been there. He was blushing.
He took the mixed drink from Eiri when he returned and sipped from it slowly. He wanted to have fun tonight but he didn't want to get drunk in the process. It was the night of their first concert in ages. He wanted to remember it and stick the memories in his mental scrapbook for later reference.
"Having fun, Shu-chan?" Ryuichi danced up to the bar and quickly ordered a bottle of water from the bartender.
"Of course. How about you, Ryu-chan? You look like you've been dancing pretty hard."
The bouncy brunet nodded. "Of course I have. I have to let my energy out somehow, right. What a better way than to dance the night away?"
Shuichi laughed. "I feel sorry for your partners."
"I've only been dancing with Take-chan," Ryuichi said with a pout. "He was sitting by himself and looked lonely, so I thought he could use a friend."
The tall raven-haired man appeared from somewhere in the crowd a moment later, a smile in his green eyes though no emotion was showing on his face. He too ordered something to drink from the bartender and settled down onto the stool next to Ryuichi.
"Hey, Takeru. Having fun?"
He nodded quickly. "Loads. I haven't had this much fun in a long time. Thank you for inviting me, Shuichi."
"Not a problem," he said with a shrug.
They all fell into easy conversation, sipping from their drinks while laughing at Hiro's random outbursts and the blush that continued to darken on Suguru's face. They all almost fell out of their chairs when Hiro's face seemed to drop and he jumped from his stool and ran toward the bathroom. When he returned to the bar, he looked a little more sober, though he looked exhausted as well.
Touma and Mika and Noriko and her husband joined the group a little while later and they soon ended up having to move to a larger table so they could talk easier. K and Sakano had left soon after they had arrived so they could visit with their families one last time before leaving.
"We're off to Kyoto next," Ryuichi said with a happy little dance. "I haven't been there in ages."
Shuichi smiled and elbowed Eiri in the side. "This'll give you a chance to visit your father."
Mika snorted. "Don't get your hopes up, Shuichi. He wouldn't visit that man if it was the only thing that would keep him alive."
"I know…" Shuichi said with a chuckle. "Just thought I'd pick at him and have a little fun."
Eiri glared at him but Shuichi stuck out his tongue and made his lover smile. Shuichi smiled back and linked his arms with Eiri's, resting his head on the blonde's shoulder.
"So…it's just gonna be us for the next six months. First here, and then America and probably Europe and Australia as well," Touma said with a sigh. "It's going to be…interesting."
"Oh, come on, Touma. It's gonna be fun!" Ryuichi shouted, punching his friend playfully on the arm. "You get to spend the next six months with us." He spread his arms out in front him and smiled. "I can't wait!"
"I agree with you both. It's going to be interesting but fun at the same time," Noriko added. "Besides, the families get to come along so it's not like we'll be missing anything."
Touma sighed and Mika punched him, and not as playfully as Ryuichi had. He jumped and rubbed his arm, frowning at his wife.
"Oh, loosen up, Touma. It's gonna be fun. Just look at how you've enjoyed tonight. You get to do this almost every night for the next six months."
The platinum blonde groaned and buried his head in Mika's shoulder. "I don't think I'll be able to make it through six months of this," he moaned.
Ryuichi jumped up from his seat and stood with one fist on his hip, the other than thrust toward the ceiling and holding up a finger. "To Kyoto or bust!" he shouted.
The table erupted into laughter.
"To Kyoto or bust!" they all shouted and jumped up like Ryuichi had, even Suguru.
The group lost themselves in another bout of laughter and collapsed into their seats.
Shuichi couldn't keep the smile from his face as he let his eyes linger on the faces of the people who surrounded him…the people who had grown to become his family and closest friends. He couldn't think of a better group of people to spend six months away from home with. He knew that they would get in their fights and would quickly find themselves getting on each others nerves, but he also knew that everything worked out for the better…in love and hate.
-OWARI-
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! ::sobs:: I had so much fun writing this chapter, especially the club scene and it didn't set in that I was writing the last chapter until I wrote those last four words…in love and hate…the four words that were going to end this baby since I had started it…
Aside from writing the chapter…I had so much writing this whole entire story. It was a long and increasingly difficult road, but here we are, at the end and looking back on everything it took to get to this point. Over this past two years, I've shed a lot of blood and tears, grown and become a better person, become more confident in myself and my writing, overcame demons, lost to demons and then overcame them again…and I've met sooo many beautiful and amazing people and it's all because of you guys…
To have my fan fic accepted so well into the community was a godsend…amazing… I never thought that so many people would have been able to relate to a life spent struggling with cutting. And even those of you who didn't relate to cutting, I have a tremendous amount of respect for you because you were able to read this convoluted, morbid tale and didn't judge Shuichi for the things that he did…you didn't judge me for the things that I did…
To everyone who has ever reviewed "ILaH," and even to those of you who have been following this story and haven't reviewed… I don't have the words to tell you how thankful I am to have you guys. If it wasn't for you, I probably wouldn't be writing today… It wasn't only my friends who helped me get through my tough times, it was my writing, which ultimately leads back to you all because you gave me the confidence to keep writing…gave me the willpower to keep going and to believe in myself…
My original plan was to go through and write something to everyone who has ever reviewed my story, but unfortunately messed up that plan by deleted my story back in January so now I don't know who I would write to… But…to those of you who have stayed with consistently so I can remember who you are…
kuriqa: Do I even need to write a thank you for you, babe? Hehe… You are one of my best friends and I love you to the moon and back (wow…that was cheesy). You've been there for me when I needed someone to talk to for the past two years. It doesn't matter that I didn't get to hear your voice until only a few months ago. You're more than my Hiro, and even more than my Aiko… Aishiteru eien ni…::hugs::…
GravityNeko: You haven't reviewed the past couple of chapters, but you're the one who kept my butt in gear by your random IMs asking how work on "ILaH" was going. How disappointing was it to almost always hear that it wasn't going that great? Hehe… Thank you for your support…
Dhampir: Dunno when you'll get to read this, but when you do… You are so totally the better writer…you have been and always will be. But I'm glad that someone else was able to write such an accepted fic that dealt with cutting. And I admire you because you've written something so beautiful without having experienced it. ::hugs:: I'm sorry that you hurt your hand again and I hope that it gets better soon so I can read some more angst…Hehe…
Trav: FUCK YOU, CRAB!!!! Hehe… As always, I hate you and will dance in your blood on the day that I kill you. ::hugs:: Just kidding…you know I love ya. You're my other little brother and my fellow otaku. I would say that I was sorry that I got you into shonen-ai, but you would know that I was lying so I won't get into that. Hehe… But yeah, you're awesome and all that other totally cool jazz that I should say to make you feel better about yourself but I'm too lazy to do it…::glomps::…
SourSkittlez: You probably weren't expecting one of these, ne? Hehe. Thank you so much for your extremely random reviews and comments on "ILaH." They always made me have a good laugh, even if I was sitting in the middle of a quiet classroom where I was supposed to be doing schoolwork. Thank you, and I hope that you're doing well…
InfiniteDarkness2007: Well…we have our days, huh? I just wanted to say thank you for your reviews, even if some of them went beyond the border of constructive criticism and into flame territory. You were my first flame, actually…but now I've gotten used to them. Hehe… I hope that you liked this chapter…it wasn't depressing and it wasn't sickeningly sweet, either… I kept that in mind while writing…
animegirl12182: ::hugs:: YOU'RE ALIVE!! Hehe… I want to thank you bunches and bunches…mostly for doing a good job of freaking me out when you told me that you lived in Louisville and even knew where Borden was. I think I almost had a heart attack. No one ever knows where Borden is! Hehe… Thank you for sticking in with me and becoming my e-mail buddy. ::hugs:: I hope that you're well! I'll e-mail you soon…
And there are soo many more of you… Josh, DaisukeAizawa, xo-silent-whispers-ox, DemonicDragon666, Lenora, DaggerForFate, darkangel818, Darkness Dreamer, Blue weary black angel, yamiKitsune, yuki ayamezuki, Luciver, i love athrun, Ichigo Pocky, lovelandkiss, Invader Nicole, Sakuya lover, Lastaras, Annie loves it, Guren, Kitty in the Box, and many, many, many more. I LOVE YOU ALL!!! As I've said before, every single one of you is amazing, especially those of you whom I've gotten to know on a personal basis. You're great…
And, because I can't draw the ending out any longer, I guess this would be as a good a place as any to declare "In Love and Hate" complete. But, after 193 pages of twisted morbidness, there is one more addition after this which contains the songs I've used in this story in case anyone was wondering or wanted any of them…
::big flying tackle glomps to everyone::
I love you…you're amazing…
…and, more than anything, thank you…
Kolie
page 10
Tuesday, October 31, 2006