Story: The Nobel Laureate
Chapter 3
Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
Previously: Jed and Abbey were at John's bedside when he passed away; a woman from Jed's past prepared to go to John's funeral (chapter 1); Jed was surprised to learn Lizzie tried out for cheerleading instead of basketball (chapter 1)
Summary: Jed introduces Abbey to an old friend; Leo tries to reach out to Jed; Jed admits why he's angry at John
AN: This is just my take on how the Jed/John relationship became what it is on TWW. I promise I'll stop torturing him soon and we'll get on to the happier part of this story!
Feedback is always appreciated!
The blonde woman slipped into her shoes and spun around to look in the mirror. Her pearls were clasped around her neck, every glowing gem perfectly lined as the strand dipped over the top of her black dress. She ran her fingers through her hair, adjusted her hem, and left the bedroom. Her keys sat next to the morning paper and when she found them, her eyes glazed over the photographs of state candidates, sparking a flood of memories that instantly washed over her.
There was that young man she had met all those years ago. He was in high school back then, an outstanding student, popular among his peers and adored by the teachers. He was outspoken, articulate, a natural-born leader who once rallied for equal pay among school employees.
She remembered how disappointed she was when she thought he had abandoned that cause. What she later learned was that even though Jed initially surrendered to his father's authority, he eventually fought on behalf of the women who worked at his school. It was a bittersweet victory for her. She was thrilled that someone took an interest in her plight, yet she was equally concerned about the consequences.
John Barltet was a complicated person. That was something she already knew. But she'd never forget the day she saw the true differences between father and son. The old shrill man shouted at Jed for going behind his back and organizing his friends to rally around the female employees.
"You made me look like a fool!" he screamed. "And that's exactly what you wanted, isn't it?"
"That wasn't what I wanted. I tried to talk to you about it before I did it, but you wouldn't listen. You never listen."
Jed's statement was met with a hard slap to his face. She considered slamming the door open and saving him from the confrontation, but before she did, Jed furiously left his father's office and gasped when he saw her standing just outside. She never told him she heard the heated words or the sound of a smack that jolted her. She assumed he didn't want to hear it because after their eyes locked, he lowered his head, covered his bruised cheek, and ran towards his car.
It was the last time she had seen Jed in person. She moved to Baltimore that summer and though they kept in touch through letters when he went off to college, neither of them mentioned that day ever again.
Sighing as she closed her eyes, she snapped herself back to the present, folding the paper once again and stuffing it into her purse before she left for the funeral.
There was a break in the crowd of mourners when Jed finally saw her. His sullen expression changed only slightly as he pointed her out to the woman he was with. Dark auburn hair that glowed like a fiery halo in the sun, a face just as pretty as Jed described, and a tight grip on his hand. It had to be Abbey, she deduced. Jed whispered something to her, then left her side to greet his friend.
"Jed." She leaned in to hug him.
"You look just like I remember. I'm glad you could make it."
"So am I."
"Jed?" Abbey approached, eager to meet the woman she had heard so much about.
"Oh, Mrs. Landingham, this is my wife, Abbey. Abbey, this is Delores Landingham."
Abbey extended her hand to Delores. "It's a pleasure to meet you."
"You too. You have no idea how much Jed talked about you in his letters. All these years, I couldn't wait to meet the woman who stole his heart. I'm just sorry it has to be under these circumstances." She was sorry. Not for John. That jerk wasn't deserving of her sympathy, as far as she was concerned. Today, her loyalty was reserved for Jed. She turned to him and asked, "How are you holding up?"
"I'm getting through it," he answered, then ushered her away in an effort to change the subject. "Let me introduce you to my daughters."
The funeral was small one, attended by old friends of the family and a few relatives who were able to make it. Jed's brother, Jack, delivered the eulogy and afterwards, Jed read a special passage by Roman Philosopher, Lucretius.
Once the service was over, many of the mourners accompanied the family to the cemetery to pray as John's coffin was lowered into the ground. Jed stood perfectly still. Not even a blink of his eye could provoke any kind of emotion.
"...earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord. They rest from their labors and their works follow them."
His lips moved with the minister's prayer, but he said it so quietly not even Abbey could hear him. She wondered about the memories that were monopolizing his thoughts at that very second. Perhaps they the were good ones, the few happy moments he shared with John in the months before his death. But that was wishful thinking and she knew it.
Standing to his right, Abbey stared at him for a moment, then exchanged a glance with Liz who took her place on his left side. She squeezed her husband's hand in hers, lacing her fingertips through his, then she smiled at her oldest daughter when she followed her lead and did the same.
The girls had dealt with their grandfather's death in extremely different ways. Zoey was too young to understand what was happening. Elizabeth retreated inside herself, not a tear to be shed for the loss. But Ellie...Ellie cried. Since the morning Abbey sat her down and told her, she had cried at least once every single day, almost always in private. Frequently over the past week, she turned to Jed, excited to hear stories about her grandfather. Jed showered her with anecdotes, most of them edited to suit her young ears. He left out the bad memories from his childhood and only shared the tales that made his little girl smile.
Amazing as it seemed to Abbey, it was important to him that people remember John for the man they thought he was, rather than the man he knew him to be. He was dead now and any attempt to assault his character was out of line, according to Jed. It was just another way he preserved the loyalty that kept him shackled to his father.
The burden of protecting John's reputation certainly took its toll, especially those first few nights. Like Elizabeth, he hadn't yet released his emotions. Torn between anger and anguish, he had locked away his grief and gone on with life as if it was just a bump in the road. But people knew better, especially the people who knew him best.
That night, as everyone gathered at the Bartlet farm, Jed stood out on the front deck. He took in the cool September air and enjoyed his moment of privacy. At least, at first.
"So this is where you disappeared off to."
He spun around to see Leo standing behind him. "I just needed a minute. Did Abbey send you out here to get me?"
"No. I came to tell you that Jenny called. She wanted me to apologize again for her absence. She just couldn't take Mallory out of school right now."
"I know."
Leo joined him by the railing. The two men looked out over the pasture. "It's a little chilly out here."
"Really? I was just thinking what a beautiful night it is," Jed replied.
"You always did love the cold. You and Jenny. You're both weird like that."
"How are you and Jenny doing anyway?"
He smiled. "Good. Very good. Feels like old times."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." For the first time in a long time, Leo's eyes were lit with sincerity. Neither had approached the subject of his drinking during this visit, but according to what Jenny told Abbey, the program in Europe was a success. Leo was celebrating 80 days of sobriety.
"You have no idea how happy I am to hear that. Really."
"Jed." Jed recognized that tone. He grabbed the railing with both hands and turned away from his friend. It didn't stop Leo. "I know you and I don't usually talk about these kinds of things, but..." He paused for a beat, then continued. "I buried my father too, so..."
Jed nodded and said, "Yeah."
"If there's anything..."
"Thanks, Leo." The gesture meant a lot to him. He wanted to open up to his oldest friend, especially since he knew the haunting stories of Leo's childhood, but he couldn't quite trust himself to unleash his raw feelings. Not yet.
"Abbey didn't send me out here, but she is looking for you. Should I tell her?"
"Yeah."
As Leo disappeared behind the front door, Jed turned his attention to the navy sky. Twinkling with stars, it was clear of any clouds. The moon shined bright that night, brighter than he had seen it in days. A gentle breeze swept across the field and just as he inhaled the crisp air, a pair of arms snuck in from behind and curled up against his chest.
"Hi," Abbey greeted him, her chin brushing up on his shoulder.
"Hey." He covered her hands with his own.
"Mrs. Landingham's been telling me a great deal about your father. I never knew he was so widely respected in the community."
"He was a headmaster. Everyone who didn't know him very well, liked him."
"So I see. She doesn't seem to like him very much...Mrs. Landingham. She hasn't actually said anything, but it's just a feeling I'm getting."
Jed slipped out of her arms and turned to face her. "Maybe she saw through him."
"What's going on?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why are you out here? Why haven't you said a word to your brother all day? He's been asking about you."
"He knows where I am."
"Jed." She lifted his chin to prevent him from avoiding her stare.
"What, Abbey?"
This was familiar territory. Jed had shut down after his mother's death and it took days of prodding to help him through it. "If you want to talk..."
"I don't," he said as he gently pulled her hand down from his face. "Not about this. What we can talk about is Lizzie."
"Lizzie? What about her?"
"She's been avoiding me. Do you know why?"
"She's been avoiding everyone. That's just how she is. It reminds me a little of you."
"It's not the same. I think she's mad at me."
"At you? Why on Earth would she be mad at you? She's concerned about you. Why would you think it's anything more than that?"
"Because every time I've tried to talk to her in the past week, she's ignored me."
"She's 14, Jed. Her grandfather just died and she needs time to deal with it, just like the rest of us. Besides, if you think she's avoiding you, maybe it's because she thinks you're mad at her."
"For what?"
"Cheerleading."
Jed rolled his eyes as he sputtered. "Cheerleading," he repeated. "I'm not mad at her, but will you agree that it was dishonest what she did? She could have easily come to us and told us she didn't want to play basketball anymore."
"Maybe she thought you'd be disappointed."
"Not as disappointed as I was when I realized she kept me in the dark about it. All I want is for her to be honest about these things. I want her to feel like she can tell us anything, whether it's about cheerleading or..."
"Or what?"
"Nothing." Though he had never expressed his suspicions, it occurred to him that Lizzie knew more about his troubles with John than she had previously admitted. Several times over the past week, he thought back to the night Liz heard them arguing, wondering if perhaps that was the night that changed Liz's perspective, if that was the turning point in her relationship with John.
"Jed? Or what?"
"Is she upset?"
"About John being dead? Of course she is."
"I don't blame her if she isn't. I just want to know."
"You know she is." Abbey's eyes narrowed into tiny slits, beaming with curiosity. "Where is this coming from?"
"He manipulated her when she was little. I should have written him off for good right then and there. I should have never let it happen in the first place."
"Don't do that. Don't blame yourself. We tried to keep Liz away from him. We did everything we could. He convinced her to lie to us and she was just a little girl. She didn't know any better."
"If I had just cut him out of my life back then..." He paced the wooden deck, then collapsed on the double swing.
"Then what? How do you think that would have changed things?" He didn't reply. Her back leaning against the railing, Abbey folded her arms in front of her. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't think John meant to hurt Lizzie back then. I think he genuinely loved her and wanted to get to know her. And I don't believe for a second that you don't agree with me. If you thought he was out to hurt Liz, you'd have killed him yourself a long time ago."
"He used her to get to me. That's what he did. Who would do something like that?"
After months of making excuses for John, Jed was filled with resentment. His sudden change of heart confused Abbey. "What is it you're not saying, Jed?"
"What do you mean?"
"You kept John away from this family for six years after the incident with Liz. And when you did let him back in, you were very cautious. We both were. So why are you regretting that decision now? What's happened since his death that's made you angry all over again?"
"I'm just reflecting on his life."
"Why?"
"Abbey."
Abbey walked over to him, lowering herself to the ground when she reached the edge of the swing. She kneeled in front of him and eased her hands onto his knees. She placed her chin on top. "What is it? Why are you so bitter today? Why didn't you want to give a eulogy for John?"
"He wouldn't have wanted me to."
"How do you know?"
She was the only one he could tell this to, the only person who would understand. He looked her squarely in the eye and admitted softly, "He didn't call me."
"What?"
"When he was sick. He hadn't been feeling well for days. He knew he had to call an ambulance and while he waited, he called Jack. I was forty minutes away." Jed shrugged. "But he didn't call me."
"Honey, he was having a stroke. Chances are, he wasn't thinking clearly."
"I don't know about that. Understand this isn't about ego or about feeling left out. I was the one who was there for him all summer, I was the one who took care of him when he was released from the hospital, and the one who drove him back and forth to doctor's appointments."
"Yes, you were."
"It's not like he owes me or anything. It's just that they say that people know when they're dying. I think my father knew that something was terribly wrong because when he called Jack...Jack told me when he called, he was confused and disoriented. But he did tell Jack he loved him. He called his other son to say goodbye and, I mean, it's not a big deal, but I just wonder, why he didn't feel he could also call me."
"Jed." She lifted herself up beside him and wrapped him in a hug so tight that Jed's face sank into her shoulder.
Even if Abbey could erase everything else from her memory, watching Jed in such agony affirmed her hatred for John. The first time she met him, she was tricked by his charming demeanor to the point that she actually suggested Jed try harder to get along with him. Once she saw the true John Bartlet, she apologized for the suggestion and since then, she waited for the day she and Jed could live in peace.
She never wished him dead, but she anticipated a time when they could finally throw him out of their lives. Now that fate had taken him away, she would have given anything for five more minutes so that she could summon her strength and try to repair the relationship that caused her husband so much pain.
But she couldn't. No one could run interference now. Jed would have to accept the unanswered questions surrounding John's death and, somehow, deal with the sour feelings that were left in his heart.
TBC