Adrift

Chapter Two:I'll Never Be Anybody's Hero Now.

The Stargate opened, the iris was raised and SGA-1 walked out into the gate room. Their body language screamed defeat. Rodney McKay was silent, he abruptly waved away an enquiry from one of his staff, intent on his laptop – already looking for the next lead.

Ronon Dex was holstering his gun, muttering softly about "next time." Teyla Emmagan was watching John Sheppard, concern clear on her face.

And John Sheppard? He was trying not to think about anything at all. The bite of his nails into his palms forced him to relax his clenched fists, aware that Elizabeth would be watching from the balcony above with that look on her face.

And she was. Elizabeth sighed and dropped her head. John was not meeting her eyes. The conclusion was easy to make – another planet, another blank. There had obviously been no trace of Beckett or the men who had taken him. How many times had it been now?

This routine was becoming depressingly familiar and had been ever since that fateful day, when she had found herself following, as best as she could, in Sheppard's wake as he had set off for the tavern on M 96X4.

John had only said, "Beckett's in trouble," and had left the meeting at a run followed by his marines. When she had eventually reached the tavern, after diplomatically soothing some ruffled feathers, she had found a scene of chaos, bodies slumped everywhere, the bar maids hysterical. The security team that she had left with Beckett were sprawled unconscious on the floor, but fortunately had only been stunned.

There had been no sign of Carson. She had tried to aid groaning, disorientated people as best she could and find out what had happened. John had soon returned from the Stargate, which he had headed for as soon as he had realised that Beckett was not in the building. His instincts had been right but he had been too late.

They did what they could. Gathered witness statements from Ramirez and the others, there were plenty of witnesses. They soon had a good decisive description of the men that had started the stunner fight and, thanks to Ramirez, the sequence of events that had taken place.

And confirmation that the same group had been seen dragging a struggling, tied captive off world.

John had quickly retrieved the last fifty gate addresses from the DHD, quite happy to risk the angry crowd of traders whose 'gate travel he interrupted. He had then assembled several teams and they had started to check out the most likely Stargate addresses. And that was where their troubles had really begun.

They quickly started to draw blanks. On busy worlds where someone should have seen such a distinctive group in travel they could find no-one who would admit to seeing them. John had circulated posters and asked all the right questions but received no answers.

And the most frustrating part of it all was the certain feeling that some of the people that they had questioned knew the group that they were looking for and simply would not talk. No financial incentives or even mild threats had stirred the faintest trace of a lead. To add to the misery, the trail of the ZPM had petered out as well.

That had been six weeks ago.

And now another attempt to uncover a lead had failed. Elizabeth watched her Head of Security with concern. The echoes of the desperate way he had hunted for Aiden Ford were apparent. He might never say so but it was clear how much he cared for some of the people on Atlantis, how far he would go to keep them safe. And now she was going to have to tell him that it was time to wind down the hunt.

SGA

Down in the gate room Teyla moved away from her team to where a group of Athosians were preparing to go off world, their trading goods neatly stacked. She touched heads with the leader of the group in greeting and they conversed quietly. John was aware that there were several glances in the direction of himself and Elizabeth. He could guess the subject of their talk.

Teyla was just one of the Athosians who had tried to breach the Lanteans shock and anger at losing their CMO so abruptly. She had explained that there were rituals, ceremonies that were helpful in dealing with the uncertainty of what had happened to Beckett – even to aid the passing over of the spirit if that had taken place.

This was not mere spiritual belief. The Athosians knew that a group of people who continued to mourn, to not accept loss, became distracted, did not put their survival first and would therefore be vulnerable to Wraith attack.

Elizabeth and the others had refused to even contemplate giving up on Beckett.

Teyla had stopped bringing up the subject as frequently, but the Athosians as a group were continuing to put gentle pressure on the Lanteans – they were concerned about them.

Elizabeth had appointed Dr Biro as acting CMO but, as far as she was concerned, it was going to stay that way for a long time. Stargate Command had been compassionate, not questioning her decisions, but she knew this was not going to continue forever. Eventually the Daedalus would arrive with a new CMO appointed by Oversight. But then and only then would she sit down to write to Carson's mother.

And John Sheppard? He tried not show it but he was becoming desperate. This was Ford all over again – that had felt like acid eating at his gut and this – this was so much worse. This was Beckett.

The great city of Atlantis had become his home. The first time that the word home had ever meant anything to him. But there was no denying it was an alien place in every sense of the word. When the expedition had first arrived from Earth they had felt little, inferior, unable to match the grandeur of the Ancients, limited in every way except their optimism. Many people had felt lost in surroundings that had just not been on a human scale, possessing technology so superior to their own.

And one person had done more than anyone to bring a human heart to that cold formidable structure, and that person had been Carson Beckett. There was not a person on the base who had not received some comfort at his hands or just a friendly smile. He had felt and shared their loneliness. The alienation of the city he had probably understood better than anyone else, he had been the most homesick himself and had responded in the only way he knew how.

In a way John supposed that Carson Beckett was the heart of Atlantis. It certainly felt like that to him.

And now he was gone. The city seemed cast adrift somehow, floating lost on its wide ocean. Nothing felt right to Sheppard, the very atmosphere of the city was changed.

John had to acknowledge that life had to go on. Survey and science teams had been authorised off world again. There was a pressing need for a new trading mission to go out soon.

He knew that Elizabeth was going to ask him to start resuming routine missions any day now. Even as he stood in the gate room John could hear the bustle of Atlantis around him, the everyday sounds that showed life was getting back to normal.

But it was never going to be normal to him. He was going to go on looking. To do whatever it took until he found Beckett again.

John looked around at his despondent team. He summoned a small smile.

"All right guys – let's try again tomorrow." Rodney, Ronon and Teyla acknowledged him with small, silent nods and SGA1 walked out of the gate room together.

TBC