Three times turned
And you go,
and you go
You are free,
You are free,
And its a long way home
Heart broken, Remus looked down at his baby girl before giving her away; Lily cried, but later when Remus was packing up, she stood in the doorway and remarked, "Maybe it was for the better…"
Remus looked up at Lily in surprise; his mind was thinking about packing quickly and getting the hell out of dodge, but Lily was stopping him and his face grew warm. He smiled slightly up at her and nodded slightly.
"It depends." His voice had an odd chill to it and Lily looked coldly at him, but Remus was ignoring her eyes at the moment.
"How do you mean?" replied she, rather coldly.
Looking up at her, he shrugged, "Doesn't matter. What's done is done."
"Remus, stop that. I feel like I'm drugs and your being nasty to me is odd."
"Says you. You're the one that hates me so much! I can't even show love without you pushing me away. I take it you were thinking about the decision of ever breaking with James?" Lily had been shaking her head at him while he finished that last remark.
"James has nothing to do with this," she said, her hand raising up behind her, her head slightly pulled out towards Remus.
"Oh really? When was the last time you talked to him Lily? Huh? One month ago? Two? Maybe little over a week?"
"Oh, shut up! You know nothing!"
"I know that I trusted you and loved you and now it's being thrown into my face. Let me ask you this, have you ever loved me as much as I have loved you?"
Lily opened her mouth and Remus interrupted her, "Be truthful."
She gave him a stern look before opening her mouth again, arms crossed at her chest. "Yes," she replied rather calmly.
"Before you broke up with James when we were messing around, or after you broke up?"
This stumped Lily and she didn't answer. Remus shook his head and flicked his wand and the rest of his clothes folded together and placed themselves neatly into his trunk.
"Locomotor trunk," Remus said in a whisper. He rushed past Lily and on the way down the stairs he said, "Good-bye Lily, hope you get what you want."
He heard footsteps follow him and slipping on his shoes he didn't even bother looking at her when he slipped out the door. There was a slight chill in the September air, but he ignored it and continued on.
"Remus!" Lily shouted, but Remus kept on walking. He heard quick footsteps behind him and soon Lily stood in front of him, her hand placed on his chest. "Let's not break up in this fashion, please."
Her eyes were begging him as he cleared his throat from the grown saliva and snot as he whispered, "Move Lily."
"No." She placed her soft hand behind Remus' head and leaned in to him quickly. Remus was tempted to push her away, but didn't have the heart. At least let her have one last kiss, he thought. Pulling her closer and forgetting about his trunk, Remus gave her a full-hearted kiss, every feeling, every emotion that he had over her, in the past, present or future was pulled together into one in that one kiss. It was true soul and heart coming from him, but the receiving kiss he got was feeble, a last minute kiss, a pull over kiss that wasn't pulling over. As they parted, Lily looked at him weakly and leaned her head forward a little, but she wasn't expecting another kiss. "I'm sorry. I wish I could be…"
Remus placed a finger to her lips and nodded. "No need to apologize."
With that, he grabbed his trunk and started off once more.
All nightlong
I was wrong
I was wrong
It was me, can't you see
It's a long way home
12 years had passed since the death of Lily and James, 13 years had passed since news of their baby and 14 years had passed since the birth and giving away of Lily and Remus' daughter. It is a sad thought to behold and an even sadder memory. Looking into the pits of his new office, Remus smiled feebly; he wondered how Hermione was doing and if she was attending this school. He did not wish to ruin the surprise if she was.
The first day of classes rolled around and he looked forward to seeing the 4th years. Doing attendance, he rolled down the long list of names, but found no Hermione's in this class. He taught a sad class that morning, nothing too interesting.
His 3rd years rolled in sometime after lunch and he had given up on hope of Hermione and had actually forgotten. He rolled through the list of names. "Goyle, Gregory?"
A feeble "Here" rolled out from the classroom and he shook his head.
"Granger, Hermione…" His voice had caught in the back of his throat while saying her name and he had to force the rest of his voice out, but he looked up quickly around the room and caught a hand just in time, raised to it's full length. Remus smiled at her and she smiled back, blushing lightly.
Brown bushy hair, similar to shade of his, amazing brown eyes, also the same shade as his. Swallowing, he continued on this the list of students and started with the lesson, amazed by the fact that this Hermione Granger could be his daughter.
It took a million lives to see her smile
Don't touch,
it's too much,
Afraid of love
Afraid you might get hurt.
Don't give up,
Don't get stuck,
Right before you can go back.
Lily hadn't talked to him since he moved out and he almost had no idea of ever talking to her again. The deed was done and what she had wanted was over. What he had wanted was never there; it was silly wish he had for a long time and now… it was over with and he felt completely fooled.
Completely unrelaxed in a chair in an apartment he was late with paying the rent, and bills for electricity and water were slowly piling up and the colours to the envelope were slowing changing with.
Remus' face was unshaven and completely tired. He could feel the moon on him and if only he could have his one moment of piece back with the one women that sheltered him and made him feel alive. But it was over with and everything went back to how it was.
Smelling smoke suddenly, Remus moved out of the arm chair, looking out the window. Another apartment and another apartment fire. Concentrating poorly, Remus apperated down below outside and shook his head. He didn't have his wand on him. Swearing, he apperated back upstairs and found himself face to face with Lily hurridly looking around his apartment. "What are you doing here?"
Lily turned wildly and ran towards him. "I was coming to visit you and I saw the apartment building on fire. I was coming to save you."
She didn't look much different; her hair was a little longer and layered better, her green eyes twinkling brighter. He could see a protruding bump underneath her clothing. He furrowed his eyebrows and went into his room, grabbing his wand and returning to her, angry. Holding her shoulder roughly, he apperated them both outside and continued walking. Lily was trying to make him stop, pulling against his arm and holding him close and trying to talk to him, but he kept walking, faster and faster.
Taking her turn in action, she gripped him tightly on his forearm and apperated him to a familiar home with a different aura. "What are we doing here?"
"I need to talk to you and there is obviously something wrong."
"Like what?" Remus growled at her in a familiarly old way. "What do we possibly have to talk about? You have James now and his baby and I have nothing but a boot stuck up my ass still. What could you possibly have to say?"
"I'm sorry," Lily simply said, all his words having effect upon this pregnant brod.
Remus angrily curled his lip into his mouth and shook his head, placing his hands over his face, turning away from Lily. "Sorry," he whispered. "Yes, sorry. I see now."
Angry tears swelled in Remus' eyes as Lily tried to touch Remus forearm. "Remus, please, listen!"
"No, Lily, you listen! I love… loved you and all I got back in return was a good time and a baby girl that we had to give to adoption."
"We didn't have to give her to adoption Remus," Lily tried to convey him with her words, making him listen, but he was just getting even more mad at her.
"Yeah, we had a choice. Right, Lily, think about it. James would get suspicious over time, wouldn't he? If I couldn't come over a whole lot and then he finds out that I have a baby girl. The next thing he'll wonder about is how I can actually afford her when I can't even pay rent at my own apartment. We only had one choice and I regret more than you can imagine."
"And you think I don't?" Lily angrily yelled back at Remus.
"You sure as hell don't seem like it."
Hurt covered her face, but she inhaled deeply about ten times and shook her head. "I'm sorry I came to visit you. I hope everything goes well for you."
"Fine."
Remus turned to go and walk, but thinking in a truthful matter, he had no place to go. Turning around, he came face to face with Lily. "Yes?"
Taking a deep breath, Remus asked, "Do you mind if I come and stay with you and James for a while?"
Smiling slightly, Lily nodded. "Sure."
A/N: OMG!! This fanfiction is finished!! The worlds gonna end!! -imitates fake 60's crowd- -points to something in the sky- Look, there's Reveiw Buddy!!
If you have read, it's always a nice thing to reveiw, even after a story is finished... especially when a story is finished, yah know? Luv and huggles, YoungChica