Chapter 6 – Recovery

When Snape woke up the next morning at dawn he felt as if he had gone to sleep two minutes ago. It took him a second before he realised why he felt so worried but then he remembered all that had past the day before. He got up and dress at top speed and then hurried to the hospital wing to see Dumbledore.

As he entered the hospital wing a smell of bacon and eggs reached his nostrils and he realised how hungry he was. He hadn't eaten anything sine breakfast yesterday. He looked around for the source of the smell and saw to his surprise and pleasure that Dumbledore was sitting up in his bed propped up on a stack of pillows with a tray sitting on his lap. Snape couldn't help smiling a little bit.

Dumbledore's damaged hand and wrist was covered in bandages and it hung limply down his side. When he saw Snape he gestured him to closer and as he sat down on the stool where he the night before had sat worrying. Dumbledore said good morning in a would be cheerful tone. He was not quite able to conceal the tiredness in his voice but Snape was still very pleased to see him looking better.

"We thought we had lost you yesterday" he said "How's your arm doing?" Dumbledore took a sip of pumpkin juice before he answered "Better. According to Poppy I have to thank you that I'm still alive." Snape didn't know what to say to that – he didn't like being thanked, so he just shrugged his shoulders and quickly changed the subject. "I just wanted to see how you were. I'll go down and have some breakfast."

"There is no need for that" Madam Pomfrey entered the ward carrying another tray like Dumbledore's. "I figured you would come here straight away so I asked for breakfast for you and Minerva as well as for my patient" she said and handed Snape the tray.

"Excellent Poppy. You are always on top of everything." Dumbledore remarked. Madam Pomfrey smiled kindly at him and left them to their breakfast.

About half an later they were joined by Professor McGonagle who seemed very relieved to see Dumbledore sitting up and looking so much better. She sat down at the other side of the bed and they all talked for some time. Mostly about school business. .

Both Snape and McGonagle had lost of things to do so they left the ward after about an hour. Snape went to move all the boxes from his former office and McGonagle went to her office. Snape was had just finished unpacking the last box and was placing his books on the shelves when there was a knock at the door. Professor McGonagle entered. Without even saying hello she said: "I have just been told that you will teach Defence this year?" Snape nodded and she carried on. "I will need your booklist tonight. I have to send them to the students tomorrow."

"I will begin as soon as I have finished my unpacking" he said and continued sorting his books. He knew exactly which books he wanted his students to buy so he was in no hurry. He had had both books and lessons planned for a very long time.

"Very well. I'll be in my office if you need me." She closed the door behind her and left Snape to his books. He spent the rest of the day tidying up his office and making the required list. As nightfall approached and he grew hungry, he sent for some food from the kitchens. He didn't feel like doing downstairs where he would have to socialise with the other teachers who were slowly beginning to arrive for the start of term.

The next morning Snape went to see Dumbledore again. It was a fine day. The sun was shining from a clear blue and cloudless sky and it was pleasantly hot outdoors. As he entered the ward he saw that Dumbledore was sitting in a chair facing the grounds. He looked much better than Snape would have expected him to look only two days after his injury but he knew that even though Dumbledore was an old man he had a strength and a will to live that could not be easily beaten.

"Ah, just the man!" Dumbledore got up from the chair and went to meet Snape. "I was hoping that you would accompany me on a little excursion. Since the weather is so fine Poppy has allowed me to take a stroll outside if somebody goes with me and I promise to sit down and rest if I feel tired." He chuckled appreciably at Madam Pomfrey's concern. "I dare not disobey her on this point so I was hoping you would come and you did." He smiled widely.

They walked down the many stairs together and went outside. They moved slowly towards the greenhouses. First in silence but after a little while Dumbledore began to speak: "I believe you had some more things to tell me Severus?"

Snape had dreaded this. He had absolutely no idea how to tell Dumbledore all that there were to tell. He had tried to form sentences in his mind but none of them seemed to cover what he meant. "I don't know where to start. I cannot…"

"Why don't you start at the beginning?" Dumbledore simply said. Snape nodded, plugged up his courage and began his story.

"I never truly found out about my, well character before I left school. It wasn't until I meet… No I must start at the beginning as you said. When I left Hogwarts I didn't know what to do with myself. I hadn't been accepted to Healer training and my father had sworn that he would never see me in his house again so I got a job in an antic store in Diagon Alley but you know this all ready I suppose?"

Dumbledore nodded and Snape went on. "For the first year I was mostly alone. My mother visited my once in a while but that was all. I didn't really make any friends at work and when I was off I spent all my time in my small apartment where I buried myself in books. I almost used my entire salary on books. Then one day in the end of April I ran into Lucius Malfoy. We had known each other a little in school and he invited me to a party at his house. At first I wanted to decline but then my loneliness got the better of me and I accepted. I went to the party and sat in a corner most of the evening. I knew a lot of the guests by sight but nothing more. Lucius was a good host and he introduced me to many people but I don't think I made a very good impression. I met a lot of Death Eaters even though I didn't realise what they were in the beginning. I got very drunk that night and I fell asleep where I was sitting. The next morning I found myself in bed in one of the guest rooms. I went downstairs and that is were I met him for the first time."

"You mean Lord Voldemort?" Dumbledore looked interestedly at Snape. Clearly wanting to know more. Snape nodded.

"I went into a parlour and there he sat together with Lucius. I had of course heard of him before and didn't know what to do with myself. I was asked to sit down with them and we talked for some time. Or well he did most of the talking and I made some stammering replies. He was very interested in me and I have to admit I felt a bit flattered. He radiated power and intelligence and he focused entirely on me. After some time I don't know how long we were interrupted and he had to leave but before he did he made Malfoy invite me to stay in his house as long as I wished it. It felt more like and order than an invitation so I stayed."

They had reached the green houses and Dumbledore was beginning to get tired so they sad down on a bench in the sunshine and Snape continued his story.

"I saw him quite a lot and he always made a point talking to me when we met. He recommended books for me to read and always smiled at me in a puzzling way. I was fascinated by him. There was something about him that I couldn't understand, somehow he didn't seem human. It didn't bother me as much as it ought to have done. It only made him more interesting. When I had been in Lucius house for about three month there was a meeting one evening. There had been quite a few of them but this night I was asked to join it. He asked me himself but warned me that if I went I could never go back and I could never tell anyone what I had heard. I agreed eagerly. I had been very curios to see what went on."

"And so you joined the Death Eaters that night?" asked Dumbledore and before Snape had time to answer he continued: "But didn't you see what you were doing? Didn't you understand what you were getting yourself into?"

"I did think about it briefly but I wanted to do everything The Dark Lord asked me to. Every book he had recommended I had read and I always hoped he would talk to me and now he was not only talking to me he was inviting to share his secrets and I could do nothing but agree. You see Dumbledore at that time I believe I was in love with him. I was attracted by his power and intelligence. Everybody seemed to look up to him and even though he was over 50 at that time he was still good-looking. He was cold and somehow very frightening yes but he noticed me. So I went to the meeting and I became a Death Eater. I was introduced to the others and at the end of the meeting I got the Dark Mark burned on my skin."