This short story has been inspired by "Charlie the Unicorn"-a well-known flash. It's one of the most random and funny things ever! I thought that maybe it would work well with the HP characters.
Harry, Ron and Snape go to Candy Mountain
Snape is working on a very complicated potion in his office. He is all aone, with nobody to bother him. Everything seems perfect until Harry and Ron burst in.
Harry:Hey, professor Snape!
Ron:Hey, professor Snape!
Snape:Go away! I'm busy!
Harry:But professor...
Ron:We have to tell you something!
Snape:This better be pretty frickin important! Did Dumbledore send you here?
Harry:No. We're going to candy mountain!
Ron:Candy mountain, professor!
Harry:Come with us to candy mountain!
Snape:Candy mountain...yeah right! I'm just going to continue with my potion and...
Ron:NOOOOOO!!! You have to come with us to candy mountain!
Harry:Come on, professor! It will be an adventure! We're gonna go on an adventure!
Snape:Alright! I'll come with you!
Harry, Ron and the extremely annoyed Snape are walking into the Forbidden Forest.
Harry, Ron:Lalalalaa lalalaaa lalalaa!
Snape:Enough with the singing already!
Harry:Our first stop is over there, professor.
Snape:Oh god! What is that?
(They are standing in front of Grawp, Hagrid's giant brother)
Harry:It's a giant.
Ron:A magical giant!
Harry:It will show us the way to candy mountain.
Snape:You do realize that there is no actual candy mountain, right?
Ron:Shun the non-believer!
Harry:Shuuuun!
Ron:Shuuuuu-uuu-uun!
(pause)
Snape:Yeah...
(Grawp makes a very weird and loud noise)
Harry:It has spoken!
Ron:It has told us the way!
Snape:It didn't say anything!
(A few hours later they reach a bridge. They're gonna cross it.)
Harry:It's just over this bridge, professor!
Ron:This magical bridge!
Snape:I'm not sure about this. Seriously, you two. We should really go back.
Ron:Professor! Professor! Professor! Pro...
Snape:I'M RIGHT HERE! WHAT DO YOU WANT???
Ron:We're on a bridge, professor!
(They've found the candy mountain)
Harry:We're here!
Snape:Well whaddaya know? There really is a candy mountain.
Ron:Candy mountain! Candy mountain! Fill me with sweet and sugary goodness!
Harry:Go inside the candy mountain cave, professor!
Ron:Yeah, professor! Go inside the cave! Magical wonders await you there!
Snape:Yeah. Thanks, but no thanks! I'd rather stay out here.
Harry:But you have to go inside the cave, professor!
(A bunch of leprechauns come out of nowhere and start singing a song)
Leprechauns:
Oh, when you're down and looking for some cheering up
Then just head right on up to the candy mountain cave
When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheering land
Such a happy and joy-filled and perky merry land
They've got lollipops and gummydrops and candy things
So many things that will brighten up your day
It's impossible to wear a frown in candy town
It's the meka of love-the candy cave
Snape:Alright! Fine! I'll go into the stupid candy cave! This better be good!
Harry:Good-bye, professor!
Ron:Yeah! Good-bye!
Snape:Good-bye? What?
(Suddenly a wall closes the opening of the cave and everything turns dark)
Snape:Hey! What's going on here? Hello?
(hears footsteps)
Snape:Who is that?
PUNCH!
Snape wakes up in his office with an ungly wound in the place where his left kidney is supposed to be.
Snape:Ow! What the hell happened?
(sees the wound)
Snape:Aah! They took my kidney!
THE END