DISCLAIMER:Don't own anything associated with the show… I just like playing with the characters in it.
RATING: T – Teen (language and adult issues)
PAIRINGS: GSR & Yo!Bling pre-established in previous fics of this timeline.
SPOILERS: Sequel to "Displacement" and "Transitions"
SUMMARY: Everything is changing around Nick Stokes. Can he deal with it, and how it will affect him in the end?

A/N: A few people have mentioned a serious need for a little bit of Nick on a horse... So, there's a little bit of that, and some honest soul searching here. Hope you like it!

REVIEWS: Reviews are the way I know if people are enjoying the work or not. So, if you leave one, THANKS! And if not, I hope you found at least a little something to brighten your day, and thanks for taking the time to read.

Chapter 39
16:50 – 2006.12.22
Stokes & Wheel Ranch (Stokes Family Ranch)

The sun was just beginning to make its descent once again, as Nick stared out over the scene before him. The view of the rolling grazing land on his parents' ranch had always been a comfort to him. And as he sat sideways atop his father's prize winning Appaloosa, his left knee hooked on the horn of the saddle, Nick understood what it was that made people love Texas with all their hearts.

He blew out a long breath and tipped his hat back on his head, as he brought his left elbow down to rest on the inside of his leg. Nick listened to the sounds of the wind whistling through the willows down by the creek, the soft rustle of tender branches as they rubbed together, the faint trickle of water as it worked its way over the rocks, and the cattle on the next hill lowing as they prepared for another night on the Texas plains. Each sound brought him further into his own peace, and served him well on his quest to sort himself out during his visit.

When he made the plans for the trip, Nick thought it would be to seek out advice and counsel, to re-connect with his values, and to understand what it was that made him what he had become. Instead, he had found comfort in the quiet, out alone on the wide plains that made up his family's ranch. He found that things were not quite the way he had always remembered them while he was up in Las Vegas, and that in many ways he had idealized his life before, beyond the point of reality. He also found that few things had really changed there over the years, but that the real change was within himself.

Blowing out another slow and heavy breath, Nick glanced down at his watch and saw it was getting close to supper time, and if there was one thing Jillian Stokes would not tolerate, it was being late to supper. So, Nick threw his left leg back over the saddle and dropped his hat down along his brow before he took the reigns of that Appaloosa and lead him back toward the stables.

It was an uneventful ride back to the barn, with horse and rider moving along at a steady clip, but once they reached the stables Nick knew that the smooth ride was over. Standing by the open gate was his mother, and he knew enough about her to realize she was meeting the problem of her sullen child head on.

Out of respect for his mother, Nick dismounted the horse before he reached her, and removed his hat as he walked the horse the rest of the way to the corral. "Hey, Momma."

"Did ya have a good ride, son?" As always, she started out with a little small talk to make him comfortable. As he passed her at the gate, she followed him inside.

"Pretty good… Fixed a piece of fence up on the North Rim…" Nick played along with her draw. "Checked on the grazers in the winter field."

"And generally stayin' out of sight hopin' nobody'd have a chance to corner ya while yer here, right?" Nick shook his head and smirked as they entered the barn.

"So much fer small talk, eh, Momma?" Nick asked as he started to work removing the bridle and straps.

"Well, I'm gettin' a little long in the tooth fer wastin' time, son." She reached up and took the bridle from him, hanging it on the wall. "Are you gonna tell me the real reason you decided to come home all of a sudden? Or, do we continue ta pretend like yer a spontaneous kinda man?"

Nick cringed when his mother spoke. "C'mon, I ain't that bad."

"Darlin', you were the only child I had who planned out his own school clothes, two weeks in advance, and had them organized as outfits in your dresser…right down to socks and drawers." She laid a hand on his arm and added, "You, my dear, are a planner. And while there's certainly nothin' wrong with that, it doesn't lend itself to spur a the moment trips half way cross the country jus' because. So, it's time to fess up, son. What is it that's got ya headin' fer home?"

Once again, she had him pegged from the start. "We're you just plannin' on lettin' me dangle a while before ya went in fer the kill?"

"Oh, I do like ta give you children a sportin' chance, but time's runnin' out and I'd like to actually spend some time with ya before it's all over. And before the masses invade again this weekend, preferably." Nick carried the saddle to the rack and nodded his head. He never could refuse his mother.

"I don't know, Momma… Things have just been so turned around lately, I'm not sure if I'm comin' or goin' anymore." He watched her remove the blanket and then throw it over the rail as he started to wipe the horse down. "Everything's changin' around me, and I guess I'm jus' not sure how I fit in anymore."

"And you've never been one that adjusts to those sudden changes real well... So, other than your friend Sara marryin' that Dr. Grissom, what else seems to be the trouble."

"Don't get me wrong, now… I'm nothin' but happy for Sara and Grissom, and Cath and Warrick totally deserve to be happy and all, b-…"

"Catherine and Warrick?" His mother looked confused by that fact.

"Yeah… I didn't tell you?" Mrs. Stokes shook her head in a negative fashion. "Yeah, couple few months now. I musta forgot ta mention it." Nick shied away from her accusatory glare.

"Yeah, what with all those conversations I've had with yer answerin' machine, it musta jus' slipped yer mind." Busted again. He should have known better than to try and slip anything past one of the best defense attorneys in all of Texas. "So, what happened to that girl he married?"

"Divorce… Real messy one, too. But with Steph and Thomas and the rest of us helpin' him through it, I think he came through awright." Nick had half a smile growing from the corner of his mouth with that thought.

"Steph? Now which one is she again?" His mother was not about to let him off the hook, and she was going to pull every last bit out of him.

"She's that new coroner I told ya 'bout… Did I tell ya she's Grissom's niece? Well, goddaughter anyway. She calls him Uncle Gil, and it always makes me laugh when she says it." Nick finished up with the horse and let himself out of the stall.

As he stepped out, his mother gestured for him to grab some hay and take a seat. "Sounds like you've gotten pretty close to this woman."

"Who, Steph? Yeah, she's somethin' else, Momma. Smarter an' all get out, even more than Grissom, I think." Nick chuckled at that, because he would never have admitted that to anyone other than his mother. "And Connie'd be happy to know that there's somebody in Vegas rides herd on me even better than she ever did."

"Should we be gettin' to know this young lady?" His mother asked with the cock of her eyebrow.

Nick looked up in surprise, he could not understand how she would think such a thing. "No way! First off, I've got like ten years on her, and second, she's married. She and Thomas got married right after she came to Vegas. They're both awesome, great friends."

His mother smirked and said, "I suppose I should've known… Only women ya ever seem to talk about are either yer best buddies or yer boss… Tsk Tsk Tsk, never would've thought I'd have a playboy for a son."

Nick's expression became pinched at his mother's offhand comment. "Wha'd'ya mean by that?"

"Nicholas…" His mother gave him a down-turned glance and continued, "You've not exactly been much in the way of the settlin' down, honey. Your father and I have pretty well given up on the notion altogether."

"Wow… Nice to know my own folks think I'm a hopeless case." Nick shook his head in disbelief at the revelation.

"That's not true, darlin'. We just didn't figure you for a family man. You've always been more focused on your work, and your friends, than you ever were on a family or the future. Especially since ya moved up to Las Vegas." Her face took on a faraway expression and then she said, "I think that's why yer father was so against ya movin' away… He knew, as long as you were close, we'd still be in yer life, but once ya left Texas, it'd never be the same."

"Well, I know I don't talk to y'all as much as I should, but I'm not gettin' why it'd be any different, Momma. It's not like I'd ever stop lovin' everybody." Nick was confused by his mother's conclusion.

"I think ya know more about it than yer willin' ta admit… Ya haven't exactly been feelin' ta home all week, have ya now?" Nick began to think that his mother had managed to tap into his brain at some point, because she was bringing up everything he wanted to talk to her about from the start of the whole thing.

"Yeah, I guess… I've been trying to get a handle on everything, and I thought this'd be the best place to re-group, to get my head screwed on straight. There's just so much goin' on, Momma. I feel like I'm gettin' lost in the shuffle, ya know?" Nick held his chin up and then leaned back against the wall as he looked up into the rafters.

"Is it workin'?"

Nick chuckled, "I thought so… Until I started talkin' ta you." He turned his gaze back to his mother and said, "And I know what yer gonna say… Have I really looked at everything from all the angles? I'm tryin', I really am. It's jus-…"

"You jus' needed everythin' to slow down fer a little while, so you could catch yer breath and sort it all out. And you thought you'd get that here? Over the holidays?" They both laughed at the ridiculousness of those assumptions. "Son, you've been gone too long, if you've forgotten how crazy this place kin be right now."

"Either that, or I'm jus' not the sharpest tool in the shed." They laughed again, and his mother glanced down at her wrist watch.

She stood up and put her hands on her hips to say, "I know I can't give ya any answers, darlin', but I hope that we at least gotcha on the right path?"

Nick stood to join her and walked up to wrap his arms around his mother. "As always, Momma. And the rest is still up ta me."

As they walked back to the house, with his mother holding onto his arm, Nick finally felt like things were going to fall into place. He knew he still had a lot of work ahead of him, but he had found that solid ground he needed to build himself back up, and to finally decide what kind of man he was going to become.