One Trick Pony Chapter 17, a ranma fanfic

Authors Note: Some quick notes, since I have to fit Chinese in as well in this chapter.

- "spoken Japanese"
- thought
- #spoken Chinese#

Chapter 17

The Amazons had surrounded the newcomers and had no doubt that whoever they were, their time on this world was short. One of their cardinal rules was that anyone that got this close to the Tree of Life, was automatically assumed to be hostile. That and the fact that they were wearing clothes of the village made them look exceptionally suspicios.

#Talc, Conditioner remove the two immediately, place them in the holding area!# shouted the Amazon named Weave who had spoken to Kasumi in Japanese a few moments ago.

As the two warriors approached Ranma and her, Kasumi could tell that they were not pleased with their presence. She was concerned for Ranma, she didn't know what shape she was in, and she didn't want her to be moved until she had recovered. "Please, let us rest for a moment, then we will be happy to go with you, my friend is hurt, and needs to recover before she is moved!" Kasumi asked of the Amazon in charge.

"Silence! You have no rights at all! You are on Amazon holy ground without being invited, your lives are forfeit by default!"

Kasumi's face fell, "No! Wait! You don't understand, we mean you now harm, please let us explain!"

The request fell on deaf ears, as the two warriors advanced on Kasumi and the unconscious Ranma.

To the other Amazons observing the two warriors approaching the intruders, it appeared as though Talc and Conditioner had triggered some type of explosion as they reached for the brown haired girl. One moment they were moving toward her, the next moment they were both sailing away from her. Only the most seasoned warriors were able to detect a quick blur of movement from the tall girl.

Several senior Amazons barked orders and immediately the bystanders quickly transformed from curious onlookers to armed guards. Weave turned and addressed the Amazons on guard. #Did you see that speed? I don't want anybody underestimating these two again! It's bad enough Talc and Conditioner were shamed so, but there will be no more mistakes, I want these two taken immediately, preferably alive!#

Kasumi was not a happy camper.

She may have been Ranma's training partner for years, and he may have taught her everything he knew, but she was not ready to fight a group of strangers over a misunderstanding. Fighting Ranma one-on-one was one thing, fighting an angry mob was an entirely different matter. Particularly when she was trying to disable but not permanently harm each aggressor.

The initial contact had gone poorly. She wasn't surprised to see how intolerant the Amazons were of strangers. The texts she had read over the last several years made it clear that the Amazons had accepted the 'Shoot first and ask questions later' strategy. It also didn't help that Ranma was still out. She needed to get her revived quickly!

Before she could do anything, two more Amazons approached, one with a long spear and another with a set of Bon-bori's like Shampoo's.

Cologne, along with several other elders, were surprised when they felt the appearance of a strong Ki presence in the midst of the village. Strange appearances were not that uncommon for the Amazons. Living near Jusenkyo, the Musk and the Phoenix left ample opportunities for 'surprises'. Unfortunately, most of those surprises needed to be dealt with in rather a harsh manner.

She heard several young people run by her house, and she was only mildly interested in the excitement until she overheard one of the young women yell to another #What is a Saotome?#.

Her head snapped around at the comment, but before she could question the source of the comment, the woman was gone between two other houses.

Cologne turned back toward the central rooms of the house. #Shampoo! Come quickly, something is happening, something we need to investigate!#

Shampoo came out, looking somewhat alarmed at the activity she was hearing in the village. #What is it great-grandmother? What is going on?#

Cologne was headed out the door as she yelled over her shoulder #I'm not sure, but I think Ranma may have returned!#

#Aiyah! Airen return!# Shampoo bolted out of the front door hot on the heels of her great-grandmother.

They quickly threaded their way through the houses to come to the part of the village that surrounded the Tree of Life. Shampoo couldn't get a clear view as she followed her grandmother through the crowd. She could hear one of the Amazons yelling something in...Japanese? She heard something with 'lives' and 'forfeit' and then some coded battle commands that were used only when dealing with the most serious threats to the Amazon nation.

She and Cologne burst through the crowd to see to warriors approach two people at the foot of the Tree of Life.

Cologne uttered a cry of prayer as she recognized Kasumi Tendo standing at the ready, with a red-headed figure at her feet. A curse quickly followed as she realized that the sentries around the tree were approaching the Tendo girl with deadly intent. She liked the Tendo girl and didn't want her to get hurt. As she was about to yell for the women to stop, she saw Kasumi reach down and grab the red-head. What is she up to?

Kasumi was getting worried. Things were going from bad to worse, and she wasn't sure how much she could protect Ranma and herself from so many armed combatants. If only we had kept some of the Ki charged figurines, that helped before, what else could I use...

If she had a hand free, she would have smacked herself on the forehead. They were standing at the foot of the massive tree that stored Ki for the Amazons. True, they had discharged their worlds tree to get here, but she was sure that the Amazons would keep some Ki reserves in their tree.

She reached down and picked Ranma up by the waist. She would have carried her more gently, but there wasn't time to worry about form. She turned and lunged toward the bark of the massive tree...

#Stop her!# screamed Perfume who had arrived at the scene to see the intruders lunge toward the tree. She wasn't concerned that the fool could harness the power of the Tree of Life, she was worried she might be trying to damage the tree somehow.

#Stand down!# yelled Cologne. The situation was rapidly spiraling out of control. #These aren't our enemies! Stand down!# Her yelling had no effect, and she could see the Tendo girl turn toward the Tree. She hoped that the girl knew what she was doing, anyone but a true Ki adept would get seriously hurt coming in contact with that tree.

It's like playing tag she thought to herself and I'm tagging home base. Her hand made contact with the tree, and then all else went blank.

To the observers, it looked like a flash bomb went off at the base of the Tree. Everyone in the clearing was watching the conflict, so everyone suffered the same flash blindness as a huge discharge of Ki entered into the two strangers. Most expected to see two twitching dead bodies at the foot of the Tree when their vision returned.

Instead, they saw two women with blazing auras. The first was the brown haired girl that first held off the initial response. The second was a smaller, red haired girl who was untangling herself from the grasp of the taller girl. The red-haired girl said something to the taller one, and then they both embraced. They separated and continued their conversation/

"Wow" said Ranma as she worked her way free of Kasumi's hold.

"Wow" was all Kasumi could respond with. The jolt of Ki was tremendous, they both felt like they had been hit by lightening, only instead of being fried, they felt supercharged.

"Hey Kasumi, you okay?"

"Yes I believe so, and you?

"Fine. So what happened while I was out?"

"Not much. We appear to have returned to our world in the middle of the Amazon's village. They appear to be somewhat angry at our arrival."

Ranma snorted. "Yeah, angry like Akane gets 'somewhat' upset."

"Well, based on what we read in their books, this tree is very sacred ground. As I recall, getting this near to it is punishable by death." Leave it to Kasumi to describe a standing death sentence like it was a minor inconvenience.

Ranma saw several of the braver Amazons begin to advance on their positions. "Nope, not this time." :He concentrated for a moment and a bubble momentarily shimmered around Kasumi and his position. The look on the first Amazon's face was priceless as she crashed into the invisible Ki shield.

Ranma turned back to Kasumi ignoring the somewhat frantic efforts of the hostiles that surrounded their position. "Now where were we...oh yes, so how did we actually get here, I kind of...overdid it...on the spell this time."

Kasumi didn't miss a beat, she quickly recognized the Ki shield technique that they had learned early on in the exploration of the Amazon archives. "When you completed the spell, we appeared in this world. At first I thought we hadn't traveled anywhere, but I noticed that I could see the far mountains, so I knew something had changed. When I first woke up, there was nobody here but you and I. After a little bit, I heard a rising note or tone, then voices.. A few ghosts appeared, or at least they looked like ghosts...I could see through them, and then all of a sudden everyone was here. She moved forward and gave Ranma another huge hug. "We did it, we really did it, we made it back!"

Ranma hugged her back, her head buried in Kasumi's shoulder. "We did, didn't we? I told you I'd get you back. Guess maybe I overshot getting back a bit and things had to catch up with us. I wonder if anybody still remembers us? It's been along time."

They pulled apart as they heard an unexpected familiar voice call to them. "Son-in-law, I see that once again you've cheated the odds! Welcome back!"

The two of them turned toward the voice to see Cologne pogo through the last ring of people. When she got to the edge of the Ki shield she stopped and inspected the construct. "Most impressive son-in-law, most impressive! I take it you learned a bit from your studies? I'm surprised you learned something so quickly."

Ranma was puzzled. First, it didn't seem like Cologne had aged at all, and second, she was talking like they hadn't been gone that long. His suspicions were confirmed when he saw a head of purple hair come toward them through the crowd. Shampoo emerged from between two warriors with a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Aiyah! Airen and nice girl make it back! This too good! Now Ranma stay in village as Amazon husband!" she almost bounced with glee.

Ranma turned to Cologne. "Hey old...Cologne, how long have we been gone?"

Cologne looked at the two of them. "You've been gone about a month. We gave up hope for you after the first week since the records indicated that most victims of the scroll never lasted more than three or four days."

"But Ranma, we were gone..."

Ranma interrupted her sentence. "...a little longer than that" he completed for her. In a lower voice he told her "they don't need to know any details...yet. We still aren't out of this, and I'm not sure how they're going to take us learning all of their most treasured secrets."

"Oh yes, you are probably right." she agreed.

It was at this time that Shampoo noted how close the two were standing, and how they seemed to be protecting one another. "Ranma, why you stay so close to nice girl?"

In all of the years of their exile, they never really considered that they'd be returning to the exact same mess they left. "Ah...you see..."

Shampoo stamped her foot down. "No, nobody have Ranma for husband but me." She turned to the some of her friends nearby and said #Take the brown haired girl away! Do not harm her, but I want her out of my sight!#

Ranma saw two of the girls move toward him and new things were going to get ugly. He quickly tried to remember some of the Amazon laws he had read while searching for a way back. Yes! That's it!

"Elder Cologne!"

Cologne raised an eyebrow at the honorific. What is the boy up to now?

Ranma raised her voice so others could hear. "I wish to apply for safe passage through Amazon lands, by trial of combat."

A murmur ran through the crowd, as the few who could speak Japanese translated his request.

Shampoo didn't understand. "Great-grandmother, what Airen mean?"

Cologne couldn't hide her look of surprise, then caution. How could son-in-law now about that? It's an old law that is hardly used, even Shampoo doesn't know it exists. I'm missing something here. She turned to address Shampoo. "It is an old law allowing a stranger to pass through the lands and not be subjected to Amazon laws. To obtain permission to do so, one must challenge an Amazon warrior to battle, and it only applies to women."

Shampoo's face lit up. "Then it no apply to Ranma, He is male!"

"I believe Shampoo is correct, you may be cursed, but in Amazon eyes you are still male." Cologne didn't know what Ranma was up to, but his request wouldn't be honored, it only worked for women.

"First, the law states that any woman making the request, gains safe passage for herself, and her party, and second who said anything about me taking the challenge?" she replied, showing a casual smile to the crowd.

Shampoo looked perplexed, then asked "Well who fight then?"

Ranma surprised everyone present, when he turned to his wife and said "She will."

"What?" said three people simultaneously.

Cologne who hadn't seen Kasumi's initial defense of Ranma, was the first to elaborate. "Son-in-law, it isn't responsible to let the Tendo girl do this, she isn't a fighter."

Shampoo wasn't willing to let such a blunder pass by without taking advantage of the goof. "Fine, I fight her. Ranma my Airen, so it is my right to battle."

Kasumi looked at Ranma questioningly. "Are you sure about this Ranma?"

"Absolutely Kasumi. Trust me, you can do this."

Kasumi blushed, but realized that Ranma knew both her and Shampoo's fighting skills, and there was no way she'd risk her being hurt.

"Very well Shampoo, I accept your challenge."

Cologne could only look on in shock. Something is very, very wrong here. There is now way that son-in-law would let the Tendo girl fight for him, he must be up to something, but what? "Very well, by the old laws, we accept your request for trial by combat."

The match was held on the same damn log that Ranma had defeated Shampoo on so long ago. Now that he knew more about Amazon techniques, he realized that fighting on the log prevented the use of many of the Amazon special techniques that he had learned, or at least most of the easier ones.

Shampoo was trying to convince Kasumi to give up early. "Too too nice girl should not be pretending to be Martial Artist, you go home and leave Ranma to me and not get hurt."

Kasumi stood in a relaxed stance, which if Shampoo hadn't been so overconfident, she would have recognized as the same type of stance Ranma used. "Thank you Shampoo, but I think I'll be fine right here, shall we begin?"

Shampoo lunged forward with a simple sweep kick. She intended to take the Tendo girl out quick and gently, so that this charade would end quickly. She was surprised when her leg passed effortlessly under Kasumi, who seemed to move out of the way without any real effort.

The Amazon upped her attack and released two quick body blows with both ends of her bon-bori. The only problem was that as the spherical ends of her weapon approached Kasumi, they cracked off and landed on either side of her. Shampoo looked at her favorite weapon with a puzzled look. "How you do that?"

How indeed? Cologne thought Even I was barely able to follow her move. And if I'm not mistaken, she used blades of Ki to sever the ends of Shampoo's weapon! There is no way the Tendo girl could be that good. Cologne yelled to her great-grand daughter "Shampoo, something is wrong, treat her as your most dangerous opponent!"

Shampoo had too many years of training to not listen to her great-grandmother during a battle. She immediately shifted stances, and began a blistering attack on Kasumi. She was amazed as the girl deflected every blow. As the attack continued, Kasumi only showed a calm peaceful face as Shampoo's became flushed with frustration.

Cologne looked over to Ranma, expected to see concern spread across her face. To her horror, she only saw a look of pride! She...she...is not surprised. She expects her to win! How is this possible, the Tendo girl was not a fighter before, there is now way she could have trained her so well!

The elder turned back to watch the fight, or rather lack thereof. As she did so she heard Ranma casually state "Kasumi, you have to end this, to prolong it only embarrasses Shampoo." She watched as Kasumi quickly blurred and Shampoo was thrown off the log. It wasn't even a contest.

Cologne watched Kasumi with interest. Curious, if I didn't know better, I'd say I saw some Amazon moves in Kasumi's blur of motion. I'll have to talk to son-in-law about it later.

If Shampoo had retained consciousness, she would have been wailing about how unfair this was. Instead, she was being carried off as Kasumi jumped from the log and walked over to Ranma and Cologne.

"So Elder, do we have safe passage now?" Kasumi asked.

"Yes, yes, of course." she muttered.

Kasumi continued, "And safe passage implies any penalties or judgments against the members of the parties are null and void, correct?"

What? No! They can't know of that clause, we don't tell anyone of that clause! Her eyes squinted with suspicion. "How do you know that?" she hissed.

Ranma glanced around, noting that nobody was standing that near to them. Cologne had been instrumental in their return, so she at least deserved to know the whole story.

"Elder", she started, her eyebrows rose at the proper term. "We owe our existence to your offer of your key, which we obviously made use of to return here."

"Yes, I assumed you must have figured out how to use it and what it gave access to. I'm still not sure how you managed to do all that in such a short time." She looked at both of them. "For that matter, I'm not sure how you managed to last past the first few days..."

Kasumi jumped in. "We survived because Ranma kept the creatures from attacking. He was able to trickle his Ki into the world around us, preventing the things from destroying our world."

Cologne was impressed, it must have taxed the boy to no end!

"As far as doing so much in a short time." Ranma glanced about, double checking that nobody else could hear her. "Our best guess is that we were in that world for over twenty-two years. I don't know why we didn't age, I'll probably never know. But we had plenty of time to study about the Amazons, and to get much, MUCH better."

Cologne blanched at the implications. That long, that long in the archives? Who knows what they've learned! Even I haven't spent that much time pawing through all that material. Wait, if they were there that long together... She glanced down at Kasumi's hand, and only then noticed the ring on her finger. Her shoulders slumped in resignation. "Very well, I understand. You can't blame an old woman for trying, can you?"

Ranma gave her a smile different than any she had seen before. It wasn't the smug, self-certain smile she had seen so often. Instead, it was a knowing, comfortable smile, something you would expect out of a friend. "Not at all, not at all. I'd like to thank you again for all of your help, without you, we would have been lost there forever." He bowed to her. "Consider us in your debt, if you every need us, we'll both be there."

It had been a long time since Cologne had actually been touched by someone she respected, and she'd almost forgotten how good it felt. "Thank you, that actually means quite a lot to me."

"Excuse me Ranma, but we'd best leave while we're ahead. With your luck, the longer we stay, the more chance of something going..." she stopped in mid-sentence as she saw Shampoo approach, a look of fury on her face.

"You two think you so smart! Let's see how smart you are when rest of village knows who Ranma really is!" She whipped a small cup of warm water up and splashed Ranma, who shifted to his male form.

Several women following Shampoo witnessed the transformation. #It is true, he is a male. Maybe she is right and they did cheat somehow# they muttered.

They were quickly surrounded again, and this time Ranma figured he had to put a stop to things once and for all.

"ENOUGH!" he yelled, and let his aura burst forth. A Ki field burst forth and slammed every Amazon but Cologne against the walls of the buildings around them. They were pinned to the walls by the force of the attack, and stared wide-eyed at the apparent display raw display of power.

Fascinating! Cologne thought with a razed eyebrow. He must have fantastic control to not have included me in the attack. I wonder just how good he has gotten during his...absence.

Ranma turned around, looking at each Amazon against the walls. "This will stop NOW. We used no tricks, only skill. We passed your test fairly, we know the laws better than most of YOU. I have promised our help to the Elder here as a sign of gratitude."

Mousse, who had snuck in behind Shampoo, spat at Ranma, "Saotome you fiend! I'll never give up. You shall be punished for what you have done to my poor Shampoo!"

Ranma whipped around to face Mousse. "What I have done to her? I gave her an out from this stupid Kiss of Marriage/Kiss of Death mess. When Kasumi won our safe passage, she could have let it go, but noooo, she had to have it her way or no way." Ranma glared at both of them.

Shampoo strained against the Ki field Ranma was generating "You is Shampoo/'s husband, it law!"

"I'll never rest Saotome, I'll get you yet!" cried Mousse.

Ranma shook his head with frustration. They were both crazy in their own way. Shampoo for her fanaticism to the rules and Mousse for his blindness. Ranma stepped up to Mousse and hit several pressure points within the blink of an eye. "Mousse, because I never could trust you to not attack me or my family again, I have cut off your access to your hidden weapons, and cut your strength to normal levels. No, this isn't the moxibustion technique, it just makes you a normal person, who can't effectively attack anyone behind their back again."

He stepped back and turned to Shampoo. "You, on the other had, are a little more difficult. Your fanaticism toward some of your rules is...disturbing. Cutting your strength might be considered too...severe. However, I know you place your village's safety highly so maybe this..."

Ranma walked back from Shampoo, and spoke in a loud voice to the rest of the village pinned to the walls around him. "Listen to me, as of right now, I am an ally of the Elder Cologne. Some of you" he glared at Shampoo, "feel that I should be forced to be a part of your village. Perhaps a demonstration is in order to convince you otherwise."

He bent his head forward, with his hands in front of his chest. He didn't call out the attack. He and Kasumi learned long ago that they no longer needed to call out attacks to execute them. The ball of Ki grew between his hands. Instead of growing larger like many expected, it grew brighter and brighter.

Many of those watching were impressed, but the Elders, who could see how much power was held between the boys hands, blanched with apprehension.

Ranma lifted his head up, and launched the energy not at the village, but at a butte overlooking the village. With a terrifying explosion, the butte was vaporized, leaving a semi-circular shape where the blast went through it.

He turned around to view the stunned faces of those around him. "Every day, every time you think you might want to come and...force me...to do something against my will, look at that cliff..and think again! If anybody from this village ever bothers me or my family, I will no longer be an ally of this village, I will be its adversary, and Herb or Saffron will look like a small child compared to me!"

Cologne walked up to him and calmly said "Impressive Ranma, I knew you grew during the time you were gone, but I didn't realize how much. I will speak for the village when I say 'Thank you for your allegiance'. I guarantee Shampoo will not be any more of a problem. And on a personal note" she dropped her voice a notch "thank you for how you handled Shampoo. She won't go against the village, and you had every right to be more severe with her."

Ranma bowed to Cologne. "Thank you. Kasumi has taught me a lot about the...ramifications...of my actions. I think it helps quite a bit, don't you?"

"Indeed! I take it you didn't just study Martial Arts while you were gone? I noticed you were pretty confident with those pressure points on Mousse."

"Nope! Let's just say that you Amazon's have a lot more interesting material than just Martial Arts techniques."

Ranma walked over and knelt low. Cologne wasn't sure what he was going to do, but the last thing she expected was a hug!

"Thank you Cologne." he whispered. "I read what the punishment was for giving away your key to the archives...I'm glad to see they were...understanding. Kasumi and I are here because of the risk you took, I won't forget it."

He stood up, and walked over to Kasumi. "Come on Kasumi, lets go tie up some last loose ends, but first, I want to find a good meal, being a vegetarian all those years wasn't by choice, I'd like a real meal for a change."

"Now that I can help you with Son-in...Ranma. Come with me."

Both Ranma and Kasumi displayed huge smiles at the possibility of a real meal again. Needless to say, the Amazon stores were heavily depleted that afternoon, Kasumi had learned some of the Saotome eating techniques after all that time with Ranma.