Chapter 16—Like You

Jeremy looked at the ceiling of the cold gray room, thoughts rushing through his head. Finally, they registered into a complete thought. I cannot let this happen.

"I can't do this," Jeremy said hurriedly.

"Why?"

"I…I have a boyfriend," he said firmly.

The girl stood up, raising an eyebrow, "A boyfriend?"

Jeremy nodded.

She gently pushed a piece of chestnut hair behind her ear. Without further warning, she laid a firm hand across Jeremy's face, "That was for even thinking of doing that when you had someone at home. He deserves more."

Jeremy rubbed his cheek in shock, mouth slightly open.

"But…"

"Wait, I'm not finished. You did stop it, and you were completely honest with me…so that deserves some credit…just…don't fuck up what you have with this guy, okay?" she asked.

Jeremy nodded.

Jasmine, the brunette girl he was with, straightened her rival school cheerleading uniform and left the cold gray locker room.

Jeremy was still in shock of what just happened.

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Stupid Xander. Asshole. God…what could I have seen in him?

Nick was thinking quickly, throwing clothes into his now empty backpack.

"Going somewhere?"

Nick's head snapped up.

"What do you want?"

Xander sighed, walking over to Nick and taking a seat in an adjacent facing chair.

"I came to apologize."

Nick slowly stopped packing.

"For what?"

"For…everything. I really can't explain what's happened with all this…really, I can't. I just know that we need you here. I need you here."

Nick looked at Xander, "What do you mean by that?"

"Well…we need your help with Koragg and the others…and…well, you're a friend. So, you should stick around."

"Right…friend…"

"Well what did you think I meant?" Xander wondered further.

"Nothin', that's what I thought…just…"

"Nick…I thought we already cleared that up. In fact, you were the one who wanted something else," Xander explained.

"I know…" Nick said, "And…well…I dunno."

"You're with Jeremy…and well…I was with Casey."

"Well then why are you here, when you could be talking to him."

"He's not home. I went there, and knocked, and knocked, and knocked some more. I called his phone and everything, but he's not there, and neither is his dad."

Nick pondered that a moment, "Maybe you should call his dad's work. I mean…if Casey and him are both gone, wouldn't he have to notify them?"

Xander grew a big smile, "Yeah! Great idea!"

He withdrew his cell phone then stopped.

"I don't know his dad's number."

"Well do you know where his dad works?"

"No."

Nick thought, "Well…why not just go back to Casey's? Maybe they're back now?"

Xander nodded, and was about to take off when he stopped.

"Thanks…by the way."

"Yeah," Nick replied.

"You're staying, right?"

"Uh…well, I'm might just ride out and meet Jeremy at his game. I guess there's this big tournament they're trying to get in."

Xander had an urge to tell Nick to do otherwise, but he swallowed the urge and forced a smile "Yeah…okay. Well, see ya round."

With that he was gone.

Nick sighed a breath of relief and looked around the room, then grabbed a jacket before grabbing some dinner. When he finished, he would make his way to Jeremy. But as he ate…he had lots to think about. Lots.

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Jeremy was getting dressed for their match, his teammates around him either wrestling or quiet like he was. He always got nervous before games, they'd never won anyway, but he still got nervous. Lucky for him, the tournament was for all the schools…even the losing ones.

"Hey Jer, you okay?" one of his teammates asked him.

This was one he knew fairly well, Chase Wentworth. He was a tall, sturdy linebacker on the team with brown hair and matching eyes. He was only half dressed.

"Uh…yeah," Jeremy replied quietly, snapping from his daze.

He'd almost let a girl go down on him. Almost. But he thought he was gay. Gay. Not bi. What did that mean? Did it really mean that he wasn't just attracted to one gender?

"You don't look so great…I mean…no offense," Chase added, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I uh…I always get nervous before games, even though we never win," He said lightly.

Chase looked at his blond friend with the spiky hair. He was openly gay, but it didn't stop him from doing what he loved. And although not everyone on the team was okay with it at first, they learned to accept it, or they quit…after a few beatings. See, despite what most people at the school thought, Jeremy had a really rough time coming out to the guys. He did get busted with Xander after all, but that didn't make it easier. Xander was younger then, not nearly as confident as he was nowadays, and Jeremy was much more insensitive. Both were Sophomores, but Jeremy was 'higher up' on the social hierarchy, which made it even easier for him to take what he wanted: Xander.

It began around Christmas break of last year. They'd been assigned a project together to work on over the break. Unfortunately, it was a major Chemistry grade that neither of them could afford to fail. So each of them sucked it up and met at Jeremy's house everyday for the next week, gathering as much information and data as possible.

When it was possible, they refrained from speaking to each other, it was the way they both liked it. Neither knew the other very well, but they knew they didn't like each other…social groups and all that jazz. But finally, one day, Jeremy snapped. He wanted Xander, and he wanted him bad. Even then, Xander was inexplicably attractive.

He began to find ways to get closer to him, until finally, the two were almost inseparable. Where Jeremy was, Xander was, and that started Xander's rise to popularity…until that day in May.

It was a stormy night, which should've given away the dangers that would soon ensue.

Foolishly, they'd decided to run off during a baseball game and use the Varsity Locker room. A.) Not the cleanest of places; and B.) Not the best idea. Interrupted in a steamy kissing session, Jeremy and Xander both panicked, but Jeremy was almost insane with fear.

"They're gonna tell…I'm gonna be so screwed! I'll have to switch schools, I'll have to quit football!"

"It's not that big a deal," Xander had tried to sooth.

"Xander! I'm gay! That's a huge ass deal!"

Xander looked at the floor in shame. It was partly his fault they'd gotten caught. He was impatient, and didn't think that maybe, just maybe someone would come back to the locker rooms.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore…I…I can't! I just can't! There's no way…"

"Jeremy, it'll be fine, we can get through it," Xander replied, reaching for the blond boy's hand.

Quickly, he jerked it away, "No! I…I don't want to be gay. I'm not gay. No…I just…I was experimenting!" he rushed.

Even Xander could see the tension building up inside him. The nervousness eating away at his insides must've been less than half of what Jeremy was feeling.

"Look…I'm sorry…I am…but I'm sure they won't care. And besides, who cares if they know?"

"I care!"

"Well if they're your friends, they should be fine with it, right?"

"Xander, do you know who we're talking about here? They'll kill me. They pick on people like us all the time, it's their main sport."

Xander was running out of ideas, but he didn't want to lose Jeremy. Not now.

"So you mean…it's really over?"

Jeremy nodded, "I'm sorry…but I can't do this…"

And with that, he left the locker room, and Xander to go and face what would be torture over the summer.

"Who's ready for game time?" a loud mouthed, buff player asked as he entered from outside.

"You mean the time where we lose? I'm not," James retorted, who was a stocky tight end.

"Nah, not this time. We got this one on lock," the loud one, Brent, replied.

Jeremy only shook his head and stood, still only in his football bottoms and cleats.

"You sure you're okay man?" Chase asked.

Jeremy nodded. He still didn't feel right around Chase. After all, it had been him and Brent that caught Jeremy and Xander.

And there's the little history between Xander and Jeremy. I know Xander isn't in character for that little flashback, but I wanted to make him seem a little less confident and secure back then. No one's really that secure in High School. At least not Sophomore year. I love your reviews! Keep them flooding in!

------------------------ Patrick