I woke up to the smell of bacon and eggs. I rose from my bed and headed downstairs. Coach was cooking breakfast and it smelled delicious. ''Morning Charlie.'' he said seeing me. I sat down and he served me my food. I took and bite and sighed. ''It's great Coach.'' I told him. ''Well you eat up, you've got therapy today.'' he told me. I winced, I hated therapy. After I ate, I ran upstaris to get ready to go.
I walked over to Bethany's office and waited outside her room. This was going to take a while. While I waited, my thoughts turned to Connie. A smile formed as I remembered her laugh, her smile. I quickly shook the thoughts out of my head. Connie was a no-no. I'd just hurt her. My name is called and I walk inside.
''Hello Charlie, it's good to see you again.'' she says to me. ''It's fine.'' I say, sitting down on the familer couch. ''So how have you been Charlie?'' she wonders, notebook poised ready to write. ''I've been good.'' I say. She sences I'm holding back. ''What's wrong?'' she asks. ''Nothing. Ok, God. Why does everyone think something is always wrong!'' I exclaim. ''Calm down, that's not what I meant.'' she says. ''I just want to know how you are.'' Bethany says.
''I'm fine.'' I say, standing up and walking to the window. ''So have you and Connie been hanging out?'' she wonders. I wince slightly but she still sees it. It gets her attention. ''What happened with Connie?'' she asks. ''Nothing, nothing at all.'' I tell her dully. ''Charie, your holding back. What are you hiding. You know, the sooner you tell me and sooner we can end this sessions.'' she says.
''Connie and I have stopped talking.'' I tell her. ''Why?'' she questions. ''Because I kissed her and then told her we couldn't be anything.'' I say. ''Why did you tell her that?'' she asks. ''Because it's true! I am too screwed up. She deseves a guy who doesn't go to therapy. Who doesn't need help. Who didn't kill someone and is reminded of it every night!'' I scream.
''What do you mean?'' she asks. ''I've been having this same nightmare every night. We're driving in the car and we crash. I get knocked out and wake up to see Pete standing over me saying it's my fault. I killed him and it's the truth. It's my fault. Then on nights when I don't wake up from it right away, I see my mom waling towards me on the street.
She looks at me and then at the mess that is the car and she shacks her head like she is dissapointed with me. I let her down.'' I say starting to sob, the long held up pain washing out. I sink to the floor and hear Bethany walk over to me. She embraces me and tells me it's ok.
After my crying spree, Bethany sent me home. I walk inside and there is Coach waiting for me like he always does. ''Hey Coach.'' I say. ''Hey Charlie, how was it?'' he asks. ''Good we talked and I got some stuff off my chest.'' I say. ''Have you decided what to do about Connie?'' he wonders. ''No, I don't know what to do.'' I tell him. ''But Coach, I do have something to tell you.'' I say. He mutes and TV and listens to me with open ears.
''I'm sorry for what a jerk I have been. Ever since the accident I have been a brat and well you didn't deserve it. You took me in and cared for me like is was your son. I always wanted you for a dad and I'm sorry I didn't act like it more. Thank you Coach.'' I tell him.
He smilies at me. ''You don't have to thank me Charlie, I was happy doing it. I always wanted to call you my son.'' he says. We hug and I go up to my room. Laying down on my bed I realize I have to apologize to the ducks as soon as possible. Tomorrow I will and I'll hope to god they forgive me. And I've got to talk to Connie, make her understand that I didn't want to hurt her, I just can't be with her without hurting her.