Warnings : Rating for a reason. This fic will contain abuse, dark!harry, suicidal tendencies, chara. death, (some) gryff. bashing, m/m & m/f, language, BDSM, and smut. You've been warned.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Full Summary : After a particularly extreme beating from Vernon, Harry loses his memory and wanders aimlessly throughout the streets England. Who should find him but a Slytherin? No one really knows his whereabouts, and the wizarding world goes into an uproar. After gaining some new 'darker' wizard friends, Harry gains a new set of memories... and a new view of the world. He eventually returns to Hogwarts an entirely different person. Will a certain silver-eyed blond be able to help him ever revive his memory... and does he even want to?
Disclaimer : Yes, of course I'm richer than the Queen! I just love to spend my free time writing things like this, just for the hell of it. (rolls eyes) I wish, haha.
Note : The chapter titles and fic title all are in reference to a Linkin Park song, called Runaway. Therefore, not all the chapter titles refer to what the chapter is directly speaking about...
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Last Time:
That would most likely just wind up creating more battles for a long time, before her Lord would finally be able to bring down the old git Dumbledore. And besides, what if she wasn't able to do it? If Potter had been able to bring down her Lord when Potter was only a baby, what chance did she have? None, that was how much.
Besides, she had no idea of just how much Potter had forgotten, or why he had forgotten things in the first place. If Potter remembered all of his spells and magic, she wouldn't be able to even simply capture him, while she was on her own.
No, this plan would work out much, much better. And Potter wouldn't even have to die.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Chapter the Third : The Lessons That you Taught me, I Learned Were Never True
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Pansy paused for a few seconds, thinking over what to say. Potter seemed to have relaxed a little around her, if anything. He obviously didn't remember her at least, then...
"So is this why you haven't been answering my owls, then?" Pansy slipped a faked hurt look onto her face easily, then pretended to hide it just as easily. Potter stared at her, blankly.
"Owls...?" Once again the look of recognition passed briefly through his eyes before disappearing again in a flash. Potter's shoulders slumped slightly. Pansy raised an eyebrow, and pasted a concerned look onto her face. She rested a well manicured hand on Potter's shoulder lightly, a gesture of comfort.
"Can you tell me what you remember?" She examined his face for any hints of memories, and observed his features. Potter looked a little roughed up, and a fleeting curiosity crossed her mind for what could have caused this to happen to the Boy Who Lived. Letting her gaze linger, she couldn't help but notice that despite all his injuries, Potter had gotten pretty damn good looking. He was still pretty short, and a little bit too skinny to be natural. Still, he'd built up some muscle (though it was hard to tell, through the hideous clothes he always wore) and a pretty face, and the shocking green eyes sure didn't hurt much.
Too bad he was a bleeding lion heart.
"Nothing. I... don't know who I am. You're..." Harry paused again trying to associate a past with a name and face, brows furrowing in frustration when nothing rose to mind. "Pansy, you said. The only things I've been able to put together is that I wanted to be anywhere but back at a..." He resisted the urge to shiver. "house, back there, and a school park." Harry let his eyes slide shut, and tilted his head back against the wall behind him, grasping for a memory that wasn't there. Pansy nodded her sympathy, even though he couldn't see it. Inwardly, her delight was quickly growing.
"You don't remember Hogwarts? Your family... or us?" Pansy let a crestfallen look show on her face when Potter opened his eyes and shook his head at her.
"Hogwarts..." Harry rolled the name around in his mind. That sounded so familiar! If only he could place it... But it seemed like the harder he tried to remember anything, the further that it slipped back into his mind. Why didn't he remember anything? What the hell had caused him to forget his whole life, anyway? This Pansy girl didn't really seem to ring any bells, but maybe he was just drawing a blank. She seemed... fake, to him. He wasn't sure he really could trust what she was saying. But if she could tell him who he was, he'd tolerate the feeling in his gut that told him to just get running again. He wasn't sure when he'd run into someone else that could tell him anything.
"Harry..." She had to pause there, the name feeling strange in her mouth. Lacing her tone with concern to cover her slip, she continued. "You're... you're a wizard, Harry. Just as I'm a witch." She watched his response carefully at this, wanting to gauge how much he instinctively could remember about his life of magic.
Harry's eyes widened in surprise, but he outwardly showed no other response. Something was chorusing in his mind, something that made him want to clamp his hands over his ears and shout at the voice to shut up. Maybe there was a reason his mind wasn't letting him remember...
'Freak! Filthy, useless FREAK! I will not tolerate any of... THAT in this house!' The voice thundered through his mind, and Harry let his eyes clench shut. He deserved every word of it!
Harry's eyes snapped open. What had he done to deserve something like that? And yet, a part of his mind continued playing that one short memory again and again, and telling him over and over again that he deserved it.
Pansy stared at Potter openly now, surprise blatant on her features. What was wrong with him! All she'd said was that he was a wizard. You tell any filthy muggle that and they'd probably prance through the streets, the sods. Had she phrased something badly? No, that couldn't be. Had Potter actually disliked magic? He certainly hadn't seemed to, from what she had bothered to see in the past.
"Harry, it's alright, I'm here for you," she squeezed the hand on his shoulder reassuringly. Potter stilled completely, and then tipped his head up again to meet her eyes. Yeah, Potter was pretty damn short. Barely taller than her, and she was considered rather petite herself.
"Did you remember something?" She said softly, as if afraid she'd scare him off.
"Not really." Harry shook his head. "So what's... Hogwarts?"
"It's our school, a school only for magical people. Muggles - non-magical people - don't know about witches and wizards. Harry, do you... have your wand?" She asked him, hoping beyond anything that nothing she said would trigger his memories. Harry glanced at her, then shook his head.
"I assume we use them to do magic?" Harry thought back to a picture of a cartoon wizard he could vaguely remember seeing as a child, holding a wooden stick. Pansy nodded to him, and then continued.
"We might have to get you a new one then. I don't remember your address, unfortunately, so we can't really just go pick it up..." Pansy made herself look crestfallen. "I'm sure we can find a solution to this, Harry. I'm sure of it. You know, maybe if you spent some time with all of us again you might remember some of our past. Can you come with me?" Pansy inwardly smiled.
Harry shrugged. "I don't see what else I could do..." and then stepped forwards off the wall.
"One more question before we leave. Do you remember Draco at all?" Harry blinked and stared at her, feeling a powerful spark in his mind suggesting that he should very much remember this person, but nothing actually came to mind. He didn't show any of this, rather simply smiling sadly at Pansy.
"I feel like I should..." Pansy nodded reassuringly. "It's alright. For now, we're off to Malfoy Manor."
Let the game begin.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Letting go of Potter's shoulder, Pansy glanced at the gate in front of her and then back to Potter.
"Are you alright?"
Harry nodded to her, resigning himself to the fact that strange things were just going to keep happening to him like this for a while. Although, how on earth they had managed to just reappear somewhere else (presumably miles away) was still completely eluding him...
"That was apparating. Using magic to change location." Pansy said offhand. "When we get to the door, can you wait outside for a moment? I think I should talk to Draco and anyone else who might be visiting about your... condition." Pansy said carefully. Potter nodded head briefly in evidence that he didn't mind, then turned to look at the gate.
"So how do we get in?" Pansy smiled. If this had been Potter at any other time, he wouldn't have been able to get in unless directly invited by Draco himself or one of the other Malfoy's. Without his memory though, she didn't think he'd have any problems. The gate itself could read the intentions of those that wanted to enter. If you wanted to hurt the Malfoy family, it wouldn't matter if you were as powerful as her Lord; you wouldn't be able to force your way in with all the wards on the manor. If Potter could remember anything about Draco, he'd be stopped by the gate for sure. This was a sure-fire test for her to find out if Potter could remember anything... And if he didn't, they would both be able to literally just walk straight through the gate.
"Just walk straight on through." Pansy said with a smile, and then walked forwards herself. It was a similar feeling to that of walking through the divide that hid platform 9 and 3/4, but not quite so different a change of environment. You could see a little through the bars of the gates, after all.
Harry watched her go for a minute, and then stepped up himself. 'If nothing else, I wish I could remember my magic... This is insane. And...' he resisted the urge to shiver as he stepped through what felt like liquid metal. 'Incredible.'
Pansy looked at him with a grin on her face. "Alright, you wait here for a minute. I'm just going to go find Draco." After Potter had nodded his agreement, Pansy made her way across the huge front garden towards the entrance to the elaborate manor itself. Pausing only briefly to wave her wand, she stepped up to the front entrance. Her wand would have set off a doorbell of sorts for the house elves, so her arrival would be made known. The door swung open as she reached it, a house elf bowed low at the edge of it. Ignoring the thing, Pansy walked in.
"Parkinson, to what do we owe this occasion?" The youngest Malfoy's voice wrapped itself around her and she smiled to herself.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Harry stood waiting outside, staring around it at his surroundings. He didn't remember this place whatsoever, but the nagging feeling that he should know who Draco was wouldn't leave him. He wasn't sure why he felt that knowing who this Draco was was so important, but the very thought of the name caused his pulse to quicken and adrenaline to start pulsing through him. It was almost as though this body thought Draco was something to protect himself from, but that couldn't be right.
While this Pansy had seemed somewhat fake, he was sure that if she had malicious intent she wouldn't be helping him... right?
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Draco stared wide eyed at Pansy with his jaw hanging open, and for once in his life completely uncaring of how un-composed he looked.
"Harry-bloody-Potter has lost his memory!"
Pansy nodded, a smile tugging at her lips. "Yes, and I've come up with an idea."
"Other than cursing his guts out and dropping him in the middle of Diagon Alley?" Draco finally asked, reformulating his image quickly. Pansy nodded briefly, and paused to seat herself.
"Harry has indeed lost his memory, and remembers absolutely nothing of who his or his life. He was even able to pass through your gate." Pansy didn't seem to notice that she was still referring to Potter as 'Harry', and Draco nearly lost his composure again at her statement.
"But this is Potter, the Boy Who Lived here. It doesn't matter if he's lost his memory, someone or another would recognize him in a bloody heartbeat. And why are we not killing him, again?"
"That isn't a problem, and we aren't going to kill him because we're going to mess with his head instead." Pansy grinned. "Our Lord hasn't been able to kill him, and he has tried several times. There's no way we'd be able to, if our Lord cannot. And even if we did manage, the death of the Light's precious savior would just create mass panic and probably cause problems. So instead..." Pansy resisted the urge to giggle with excitement. "We're going to turn the epitome of the Light into..." Pansy paused dramatically, "the epitome of the Dark!"
Draco looked as if he thought she'd grown another head.
"I think, if we do this right, we might even be able to go so far as to get him to kill Dumblefuck for us someday, considering the coot will probably try to show himself as a mentor and guide to fix the situation. We practically get to raise him, to shape his entire outlook right now! Think of it, the media is fickle enough as it is." Pansy couldn't help but pull a face slightly at this, she hated the damn media. But for now, it would help her...
"First, they'll panic about how he is missing, and then we could let them catch glimpses of him spending time with us, willingly. It's a pretty well known fact that Harry can fight off Imperious, so no one will be able to argue that he's being forced. By the time we get back to Hogwards, the majority of the school if not everyone will be against him. So who will he trust and turn to? The only people that are being kind to him and the people that he thinks are his true friends, that's who." Pansy finished. Draco nodded slowly, catching on.
"The turning of their Savior will be more of a blow to the Light than his death would be, that would probably simply become a rallying point. Not to mention they'll then focus their hatred on him for a while, and get distracted from whatever Lord Voldemort is up to, correct?" Draco did not pause in his speaking of Voldemort's name, nor did Pansy flinch. "But what about the Weasel and Mudblood?" Draco asked.
"The Weasel won't be a problem. He's already a green-eyed monster when it comes to Harry's fame, he'll probably say that he knew Harry was dark all along to save face. The Mudblood may be a problem, but I'm sure we can find a way to get around her."
"And have you informed Lord Voldemort about this plan?"
"Not yet, no. I thought we might surprise him, once the news of Harry's disappearance shows up in the papers."
"Alright then. A Malfoy, friends with a Potter. I believe it is time, Pansy darling, for our Slytherin selves to shine."
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Harry looked up at the sky, laying back comfortably in the grass. He had decided he was going to trust Pansy, after all so far she seemed like the only link to who he was and she hadn't thus far done anything to make him suspicious of her... So why not? He sat up slightly at hearing his name called, and smiled lightly seeing Pansy walking back towards him.
"Hello again, Harry. Sorry about the wait. Are you ready to come in now?" Pansy stopped and helped him up.
"Yeah, that sounds good." The pair started walking towards the manor, and Harry paused briefly at the door. "Uh, hey. Pansy. Ummm..." Pansy stopped too, turning back to look at him curiously. "Yeah... thanks." Pansy smiled warmly and nodded, waving her wand again and stepping into the manor as the door swung open. She stopped for a second noticing Harry's bewildered look as the door swung open.
"A house-elf. I'll explain some other time." She gestured vaguely towards the thing (as Harry thought of it) holding the door. And with that they walked inside, and for the second time that day Pansy was greeted by the rich voice of the youngest Malfoy.
"Pansy, Harry." Draco stepped forwards and into view, and Harry couldn't help but stare around him at his lush surroundings and admire how at home his host looked in such surroundings. He couldn't help but glance down at the shabby clothes he was wearing and tug at them apprehensively, wishing that he could have at least gotten rid of the blood flecked generously over his clothes.
So far, His bruises were all faded at this point, and hardly noticeable... but dirt was plentiful in his current appearance. How was it that someone like him had come to be friends with someone so obviously well off? Harry wished that his heart would stop beating so loudly in his chest, but he couldn't quite calm himself around this Draco. Maybe that was why he felt so nervous when he had first heard the name, his mind had somehow known how much difference there seemed to be in their histories?
"Sorry to hear about what's happened, Harry." Draco paused, offering his hand. "Shall we start over?"
If Harry thought this was a strange choice of words, he made no show of it. Instead, he looked at the hand, then looked at Draco, taking Draco's hand with his own.
"Yeah, that sounds about good." Harry said with a smile.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Chapter the Third --- Fin
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
Good grief, please don't murder me (I'd never be able to update, so there, haha)! I could give you a million excuses for taking so long to update, but I won't ramble more excessively than I usually do and just say things got crazy busy for me and I somewhat forgot about this. But hey, I'm back now, and I don't intend to let this story die or be abandoned. Hope you enjoyed the update, and please please please leave a review before you head off to read your next fic? It encourages me to not suck so much at updating. xP
Shout outs and major kudos to those that reviewed, myniephoenix, Carlie, CofAYM, cheeseboi, Aline Potter, fifespice, ura-hd, darkangel36, JadeLilyMalfoy, Aubs, Aseret Kitsune, Anave Lipad, hittocerebattosai, Jedi-Bant, Wilbo Baggins, Kitty Meow, lil-bugga, fluffypup, Harmony Evans, and panchan. Thank you all so, so much.
See you all soon in Chapter four!
Kyoko