I had a hard time getting this chapter to turn out the way I envisioned, so I humbly beg forgiveness for the long wait between the updates. Hopefully, the next chapter won't be so stubborn. : D
This week on Lifestyles of the Buff 'n Shameless...
Behold the Power of Clark –
On the screen flashed an icon of a well-sculpted man-chest with the word ('Golden'), then abs ('Rapturous'), that flashed a worn denim ass ('Untouchable') that then changed into a flash of wryly-twisted lips ('Luscious') shyly turned away before ending in 'Farm-Boy'. Had he not known beforehand to whom those body parts belonged to he would have sent one of the many minions in his pay out to find out. He looked for the most recent entry and found:
--Current mood: Ecstatically Aroused--
--Everyone give KryptoAngel a great big helping of cyber hugs for the wonderful icons she's provided! /hugs/ As many of you are probably wondering, 'What's been going on with our favorite yet clueless star of the show?' Well, this week he's alone at home. /squee/ Mmmm, this morning Farm-Boy was painting the barn (click here to see) with his friend the Lady's-Man. Only having the Smooth-Criminal there today could have topped what transpired today. Ugh! Just makes me want to run over and pinch that ass!--
Lex let his eyes narrow slightly, 'Smooth-Criminal? I don't know whether I should be flattered or affronted.' Deciding to wait on judgment for that particular nickname pending the tone of voice used with it Lex continued to read.
--Okay, before I get completely lost in fantasyland I'd better get it all out in order. Early this morning, earlier than the birds I swear, I rolled my sleepy butt outta bed and made ready for another day of Farm-Boy watching. My cohort had to work early shift this morning else I'd make her chase down this lead. Though I'd swear Farm-Boy has a preternatural sense that alerts him whenever The Pink is around. Perhaps it's best that I'm heading out all the time, it wouldn't do to alert the unsuspecting, especially when you're after the good shots.--
--So, earliness and nothing up except for the cows and chickens…and then it happens. Farm-Boy wanders out of the house in all of his sleep tousled glory. You can tell he hasn't done more than drag on his shorts and rub the sleep from his eyes. /sighs/ I swear, it's a sight that will never leave me for the rest of my life. Ever. I practically had to bite myself to keep from jumping his shirtless body and dragging him off to the cellar to have my wicked way with him. Can anyone say 'Fantasies?' I knew you could. If it wasn't for the fact that I'm used to wearing lacy bras I'd have been seriously chafing.--
'Not something I'd have expected a teenaged girl to admit to, but then again, this is Chloe,' he thought in amusement. The idea of a sleepy Clark being dragged off to places unknown was not something he was unfamiliar with, having toyed with the concept himself on several occasions. Shifting slightly in his chair he returned his focus to the LiveJournal before him.
--Farm-Boy ends up feeding the animals and dragged out the supplies needed for the painting festival before returning to the house. I know it'll be some time before he'll return to me, to the outside. He'll be fixing himself food for breakfast and it'll be a while before he's done. His appetite is legendary in this town, you know he's always hungry, and watching him eat? It's an exercise in self-control, watching him slipping that utensil in past his lips and then wrapping around the tool to suck it clean. The way the tip of his tongue pokes out to capture the slightest bit of food at the corner of his mouth. Watching how his eyes close in pleasure whenever his mom feeds him one of her pies. I swear, he should come with his own pornographic warning label. You can watch, but you can't let him know you're getting off on it.--
"You could do well in romance, Chloe," he murmurs after reading her little tangent on Clark's eating habits. Chloe's words calling up many memories of watching Clark and feeling nearly the exact same thing while he ate. Mustn't let Clark know he was being observed. If movies and playing pool wasn't quite right for the situation, then offer to feed the boy. You certainly can't go wrong with feeding the boy.
--Yes, I know I'm rambling about the Farm-Boy, but can you blame me? You, dear reader, at least only get him in small doses. I, however, live in the same town, go to the same school, am one of his best friends. I should be allowed some leeway in this, don't you think? Now…after what seems like a half hour our very own Lady's-Man shows up and wanders inside. What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the family wall, the things you could see and hear.--
--Painting a barn, surprisingly enough, is no different than painting a room. You're just outside instead of in, up on a taller ladder than on chairs, and the possibility of shirtlessness is so much greater. The Lady's-Man is a prankster, no getting around it, and the minute the shirts come off and Farm-Boy's bronzed back is turned the paint flies. You'll just have to look through some of the pictures to fully appreciate the look of stunned that Farm-Boy gets. There's a good six different versions that he has in his arsenal ranging from "You just kicked my puppy" to "Did that pig just fly?" This one…this one is definitely a new one, and if I didn't know the Farm-Boy so well I would have bet that look would have ended the two of them in a very secluded pile of hay in the barn for some /coughs/ retaliation. Mmmmm, now that's an image I think I'll contemplate while trying to sleep.--
Lex sat back and rested his elbows on his chair with his hands steepled before him. So, he was the 'Smooth-Criminal', Lana 'The Pink', Pete the 'Lady's-Man', and Clark was the 'Farm-Boy'. Chloe's tag marked her as 'The Nose', which struck him as amusing enough to smirk at. That only left 'KryptoAngel' to place, and from the report sitting on his desk, that person accesses that account from the school's computers. Perhaps a science girl that Clark knows that he doesn't know about.
Lex put the report back into its folder and locked it away in his desk for later musings. It was while he was delving deeper into the LiveJournal that he discovered the origins of 'Smooth-Criminal.' The passing maid paused and quirked her head at the rare noise that drifted out of the office. As far as she knew, Mr. Kent hadn't stopped by yet today.
'Apparently I have sex hips that gives me criminal sex appeal,' Lex laughed at her description of his 'sex hips walk' but was pleased to find that she flat out refused to put his picture on the net on the basis that he was too recognizable. He saw the many requests for his photo and the phone number for the Farm-Boy. He was both amazed and bemused at the amount of time girls thought about and gossiped about "The Sexy" values of the people in their lives. Which guys had the eyes, the voice, every body part itemized and categorized and then piecemealed together to create the ultimate dream man.
In the middle of Chloe's comical recounting of the 'Super-Soaker Summer' Lex heard the familiar heavy footfalls of 'The Farm-Boy' approaching his office. With a few quick keystrokes he powered down his laptop and awaited the arrival of Clark.