Disclaimer: I don't own Metal Gear, or anything else I might mention in this story
Metal Gear:
In Da Hood
By: C Dink
Chapter Eight: Grand Finale!
AU: Ok, This will be my last chapter on this story.but it's jam-packed!There will be a sequel,enjoy
Announcer: The gangs on the lamb again..you know...
(Snakes car)
Ocelot: So what are we gonna do for a whole chapter?
Solidus: Dance?
Snake: We'll save that for chapter 6..
Liquid: We're on chapter 8 you moron
(Snake stops the car)
Snake: What the hell are you talking about?
Liquid: Were on chapter 8.
Snake: Im gonna beat you off...
Liquid: What?
Snake: Your an asshole.
Liquid: What the fuck..you just said you were gonna beat me off.
Snake: No...that was you
Otacon's Group
Otacon: Im glad we stopped at a diner
Raiden: yeah..i don't think CDink's gonna use us anymore.
(I walk in)
CDink: Im not
(I leave)
Snake's Group
Snake: This is boring!!
CDink: Hey guys...im sort of running out of creativity...soo, lets wrap this up.
(Suddenly a huge Metal Gear appears in the street)
Snake: Good god!!What have you become,Father!!
Liquid: What are you babbling about?
Sanke: What?
Liquid: Thats not our father.
Snake: Beautiful observation Liquid,but lets be serious here.
Liquid:...
Ocelot: I'll take care of this!
(Ocelot throws a rock...missing completely...but the hatch still opens..and out comes Solid Squirrel)
Squirrel:Hahaha!!!
All: SOLID SQUIRREL!!!!
Squirrel: You are correct!
Solidus: Thank god, I thought this was gonna be a hard fight.
Squirrel: Hey, watch it...im coming down there.
(Squirrel jumps down to the ground)
Squirrel: Now your in for it
Liquid: You jumped down here just to say that?
Squirrel: Yeah
Liquid: So now your now here..unarmed instead of up there armed.
Squirrel:Yeah..I probably should have thought this one through a bit more.
Liquid: Your new to this villian thing aren't you?
Squirrel: Is it really that obvious?
Liquid: Yeah.Here's Evil For Dummies, it really helped me.
Squirrel: Wow,Thanks.
Snake: Ok, This isn't a book club...Squirrel...Your going down!
(They all pull out there guns and aim at Squirrel)
Squirrel: HAHAHAHAHA
Snake: What the hell's so funny.
Squirrel: Well your poor grammar for one.A question mark belongs there..not a period,dumbass.
Snake: CDink, of all your corny fourth wall jokes...that was the worst!
CDink: Your just mad you didn't think of it.
Snake: Damn, your right.
Squirrel:AHEM
CDink: Oh,right.Go on.
Squirrel: Thank you.Well it says here in the book that this is where I tell you my plan.
Snake: Just don't take a fucking hour like Liquid did.
Liquid: I remember that...good times
Snake: You tried to kill me.
Liquid: Right.
Squirrel: SHUT UP!Im telling my story
Snake and Liquid: Sorry.
Squirrel: I'll tell you my big plan...my big plan...is...too...
Ocelot: The suspense is killing me...tell me!
Squirrel: Become the star of the Metal Gear series!
(gasps all around!)
Snake: It's never happening, not you alone.
Squirrel: HAHAHA
(Suddenly Vamp,Kansas,and Toto appear.)
Liquid: Damn
Ocelot: Show of hands who saw that coming.
(Everyone including Squirrels gang raises there hand)
Squirrel: Yeah..we didn't plan this I was bluffing.
(Ocelot starts to freak out and then he starts to talk like Vamp)
Vamp-Ocelot: Sweet...I can control him!
Vamp: Hey, this is gonna be confusing.
Squirrel: Now it seems your outnumbered Solid Snake!
Snake: Damnit...I was never good with numbers.
Squirrel: Let's put these guns away...
Solidus: talk it out?
Snake: Solidus?you havn't talked all chapter.
Solidus: I Know...
Squirrel: No Fools!!!We shall fight hand to hand..atop METAL GEAR SQUIRREL!!!!
Liquid: This scenario sounds oddly familiar.
(They all begin to climb the Metal Gear)
Back At The Diner
Otacon: Snakes in trouble!
Raiden: Say no more.
(they run out of the diner, and see two cop cars)
Johnny: Let's kick some ass.
(They all pull out machine guns...don't ask me where they got them)
Back to the Action
Snake: Squirrel are you prepared to die?
Squirrel: Actually yes...not been the best day.
Snake: awww, what happened?
Squirrel: It came back positive..
Snake: Oh dear god!
Squirrel: Positive..for kicking your ass!
Toto: That was pretty lame chief.
Squirrel: Maybe..but the emotional attachment was what I was looking for.
Snake: You got it man, you had me going.
Squirrel: I know man you were all like...yeah.
Snake:Right
Toto:...
Kansas:...
Squirrel: So were having an akward pause?
Solidus:...
Vamp-Ocelot:...
Squirrel: yeah we are...I answered my own question.
Liquid:...
Vamp:...
Snake:...
Squirrel:...
(suddenly Liquid hits Vamp with a chair and the battle begins)
Outside the diner
(The gang has oddly enough already killed the cops)
Otacon: We killed all the cops!
Fatman: Boy is that odd.
(They pile into one of the police cars)
Otacon: Let's go out with a bang, Shall we?
Raiden: When did you get badass?
Otacon: The drugs are talking Raiden...the drugs.
(They drive toward the metal gear...which they know where it is..again don't ask me how...these guys are just that good)
Back at the death fight
(Snake and Squirrel are duking it out)
Snake: So tell me why you didn't just kill us with the Metal Gear?
Squirrel: No!
Snake: You wanted to test my physical power didn't you?
Squirrel: Hell no, the reason why is because I can't drive
(Otacon's gang arrives)
CDink: By god...this is out of control...what have I created!
(The brawl begins to swell)
CDink: Well im tired...time to wrap this up.
(Suddenly everything disappears, and the characters all just stand there.)
Squirrel: Where the hell are we?
Snake: CDink's mind!
Liquid: Shit, is this a metaphor?Like in the movies?
Solidus: Dammit CDink!You keep forgetting to give me lines!
Ocelot: Sweet, im back to normal!Where is CDink anyway?
Snake: He realizes it's not about him it's about us...so he left.
Otacon: How do you know?
Snake: It's what my mind told me.
Ocelot: Fag!
Liquid: That a way to break the mood!
(Snake darts awake in his bed)
Snake: What the hell?It was a dream?
(Snake gets up)
Snake: 1 A.M.
(Snake grabs a phone)
Snake: I was only asleep for...
(Ring,Ring)
Snake: You thought I was gonna say something suspenseful didn't you?
(Otacon picks up)
Otacon: Snake, It's 1 A.M., what do you want
Snake: Otacon, Were moving to the city!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE END
AU: Theres my story guys...I hope you enjoyed it..even though i didn't type any into a word processor..well leave plenty of reviews,and not only am I working on a sequel..but im looking for some of my old metal gear short stories to post.
Goodbye for awhile,
CDink