Title: ATM Have a Cool Christmas Caper in the Caribbean
Author: Kaykyaka
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used within this fictional story. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made by this work of fiction.
Ratings: K+
Characters: Lita, Trish Stratus (not married in this story), Melina, DX, Edge, Nitro, Carlito, Shelton Benjamin, Randy Orton.
Summary: Three different girls from three different places end up celebrating Christmas early in the Caribbean with their favorite WWE Superstars and three very special dolls. ATM is on the case again!
Eleven – A Rude Awakening
Edge's hotel room:
Lita was flexing her toes after Edge pulled off her boots.
"Man that feels good," she said closing her eyes blissfully.
Edge put them on the bedside table and shook his head.
"I can't believe you've been wearing those for two weeks," Edge said pulling his hair back.
"Believe it, smell my feet," she said holding up her leg and Edge recoiled.
"Um no thank you," Edge said.
"What? It's no different from what they're doing," Lita said pointing back to Carlito and Trish. Carlito was reading the newspaper while Trish was asleep in his hair.
"Let them do their thing I'll wait until you're fully restored before we get cozy," Edge said then he remembered what Nitro told him he'd seen at Randy's house. "I cannot believe Orton,"
"We'll deal with that later," Lita assured him "what did you do while I was missing?" she asked sitting on Edge's leg.
"What do you mean I spent the whole two weeks looking for you," Edge answered a little surprised by her question.
"That can't be all you did, you must have slept at some point," Lita asked enquiringly rubbing the denim of his Levi's feeling the details of the fabric under her fingertips.
"Yeah sure," Edge answered appreciating the tingling feeling her little hands were causing across his leg.
"Who with?" Lita asked pinching the material.
"Lita!" Edge said in shock.
"Was it Maria?" she continued.
"Will you knock it off?" Edge said.
"Candice Michelle?" Lita asked playfully.
"When you get back to normal I'm gonna wrestle you to the ground," Edge said.
"You promise?" Lita replied.
"Here have a mint," Edge said flicking a pillow mint at her which knocked her off his leg.
"Hmmm chocolate!" Lita said unwrapping it. Edge watched her get chocolate all over her face and rolled his eyes at how messy his girlfriend ate.
"Actually now that you mention it I did have an argument with HBK," he said.
"Yeah what about?" Lita asked not really paying attention.
"Well you, about how I should have defended you against Orton's abuse," Edge explained.
"What did you say?" Lita asked him sitting cross-legged thoroughly enjoying the chocolate mint.
"I said it was Orton and not to expect anything but crap to come out of his mouth," Edge replied.
"How true," Lita said nodding.
"So you think I was right?" Edge asked hopefully.
"Edge when it comes to us meaning Trish, Melina and I it's not about what's right it's about what God wants. If you hadn't proposed to me, Randy wouldn't have said what he said, Shawn wouldn't have stuck his fork in Randy's hand pinning him to the table causing Randy to sell his soul to the Devil for protection against Shawn and Hunter and cause us to be turned into dolls," Lita said and Edge furrowed his brow.
"You're point being?" Edge asked.
"Well that unfortunate incident also made it possible for Trish to save a little girl's life, me to give a woman hope for a whole family and Melina to give a girl back the full use of her legs," Lita explained.
"So what are you saying?" Edge asked still confused.
"Romans 8:28," Carlito said.
"All things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to his purpose?" Edge replied.
"You know that?" Lita asked surprised.
"Yeah I guess I also did a little more reading while you were missing too," Edge smiled bashfully, "So when can you girls go back to normal?" he asked really wanting to kiss Lita's chocolate covered face.
"As soon as Melina gets here," Lita said thinking the same thing.
"Hey Edge open up its Nitro," came a voice from outside the door.
"Which should be any second now," Lita said whimsically as Edge flew over to open the door.
"Whoa!" he said as he was almost barreled over by Nitro, a thugged out Shawn Michaels, Cryme Tyme and a bunch of little kids.
"Quick close the door!" LC said to Cassidy after everyone was in.
"Phew!" Cassidy said, "I'm glad I don't need my wheelchair anymore, I wouldn't be able to run so fast if I did,"
"I don't know Cassie you could ride that thing faster than most people can drive," LC said.
"You'd think I'd be used to running from my father by now but I can't even catch my breath," Charlene said.
"¿Cuáles son todos lo que usted puebla hacer adentro aquí?/What are all you people doing in here?" Carlito asked looking up from his newspaper at the unfamiliar girls.
Cassidy almost screamed, "Carlito!" she said instead.
"Ése es mi nombre no lo usa hacia fuera/ That's my name don't wear it out," Carlito quipped.
"Man all we have to do is see John Cena and this will officially have been the best holiday ever!" Charlene said and LC turned her nose up.
"Don't spoil it Charlie," she said not keen on John Cena at all.
"Okay we gotta do this fast before their parents come in here," Shawn said.
"What is this a babysitting agency?" Carlito asked indignantly folding up his newspaper.
"¿Está el ese dormir de Trish en su pelo?/ Is that Trish sleeping in your hair?" Shawn asked.
"Yeah wake her up we've got work to do," Lita said.
"No!" Carlito yelled firmly and everyone looked at him surprised.
"That'll wake her up," Edge said putting his finger in his ear.
"Come on we don't have much time!" Shawn said.
"Who the Hell are you?" Edge asked looking the newest member of Cryme Tyme up and down.
"Not now Edge," Shawn replied and Lita burst out laughing recognizing the voice. Shawn looked over the bed recognizing the laugh and he saw Lita holding her stomach rolling on the bed, he also noticed the chocolate on her face, "Gees Edge at least Randy made Melina take a shower," he said scrunching up his nose with distaste.
"Ooh la la Shawn likes his women clean!" Shad teased him.
"But he likes to ride dirty!" JTG added and Shawn rolled his eyes.
"Guys you don't have to be here, we put Randy in my room you can go now," Shawn said to Cryme Tyme.
"Oh no HBK something tells me I need to be in this room," Shad said.
"Why all we're gonna do is pray?" Shawn asked.
"Sounds good to me!" said JTG.
"Yeah we're down with the Lord," Shad said.
"And you've got the king-size cross to prove it," Edge said sarcastically.
"Okay enough talk, Carlito wake up Trish," Lita said and Shad and JTG looked at each other.
"Did that doll just say something?" JTG asked Shad.
"She sure did!" Shad replied anxiously.
"She's not a doll, that's Lita," Shawn answered.
"What!" Cryme Tyme said at the same time.
"Oh that reminds me," Hunter said coming from behind Shawn to address Lita, "How come you protect his bony ass with the spirit of your anointing and I get turned into an 11 year-old kid?" he asked indignantly.
"Hunter?" Edge asked leaning closely to the blond-haired kid in front of him.
"Not now Edge," Hunter dismissed him.
"I didn't cover Shawn," Lita said defensively.
"The demon ran away from him!" Nitro said.
"Oh that," Lita said recollecting, "when he was possessed I broke the yoke around his neck and anointed him with oil and released the spirit of the Anointing in his life – permanently,"
The room when silent; with the exception of Melina, Nitro and Carlito, no-one understood what Lita had just said.
"You know, we really should be going," JTG said moving towards the door, "Shawn you're kind of party is not our kind of party,"
"Yeah your kind of party is scary as Hell!" Shad said moving away from Shawn with his partner in cryme.
"Guys come back," Lita said to Cryme Tyme.
"The doll is talking to us man!" JTG said to Shad.
"Well this is the Caribbean, these guys probably did voodoo on her!" Shad said getting nervous.
"Hey there's more to the Caribbean than voodoo cholo," Carlito retorted offended by Shad's comments.
"Who you calling cholo culo?" Shad responded and Carlito almost jumped him when Shawn stepped in.
"Hey easy on the black on Hispanic black crime guys, it's like I always say why fight if you're not getting paid for it?" he said and Shad and Carlito nodded thinking HBK had a point. "Shad I told you it's not a doll it's Lita," Shawn said, "Go talk to her,"
"It's not cool to be afraid man," Shad said to JTG who nodded nervously and they both knelt down for a closer look at Lita.
"Estoy apesadumbrado si ofendí su cultura/ I'm sorry if I offended your culture," Shad said to Carlito.
"Hey usted batió el infierno fuera de la Spirit Squad, ninguna apología necesaria/ Hey you beat the Hell out of the Spirit Squad, no apology necessary," Carlito replied.
"¡Bastantes con el español/Enough with the Spanish!" Lita said waving at Cryme Tyme to get their attention. "Allow me to introduce myself I am Lita aka the Anointed Amy, that is Melina the Miraculous on Nitro's shoulder and up there in Carlito's afro is The Truth: Trish Stratus. We are the angelic trio known as ATM: Authority to Minister, our job is to bring souls to Christ and protect His children from evil, an evil that nearly destroyed the lives of three girls two of which are standing beside you and the evil that turned us into dolls and Hunter into a little boy. I can see by your crosses that you are men of faith and you believe in God, well believe me when I say that God thanks you for your work in helping us get Melina back here where she belongs,"
JTG stroked his chin and looked over at Shad who was mulling over everything the Anointed one said.
"What do you think? Is this for real?" Shad asked his team mate.
"Well the Bible says faith is the substance of things not yet seen, I'm willing to take a leap of faith," JTG answered and Shad nodded in agreement.
"So what do you do exactly?" Shad asked Lita.
"I anoint and cast out demons," Lita replied.
"And what do you do?" JTG asked Melina.
"I perform miracles of healing," Melina answered.
"And what does she do?" Shad nodded towards Trish.
"¡Ella está intentando dormir/She is trying to sleep!" Carlito yelled.
"Okay that's it, come on Mel," Lita said to Melina and they both ran up to Carlito, climbed up to his shoulders and jumped into his hair.
"No must sleep, so comfortable up here," Trish said as her compatriots tried to wake her up.
"Trish wake up we gotta pray now," Lita said.
"What for?" Trish said with both eyes still shut.
"So we can get break the spell and get back to our normal sizes," Melina said.
"That's not how it works," Trish said with her eyes still closed.
"What?" Lita asked confused, "But it's a spell we can pray against it," she reasoned.
"It's like my baby said Romans 8:28, all things work for good to those who love God and are called to His purpose. This spell has consequences outside of us and it can't be broken until our work is done," Trish explained.
Melina and Lita looked at each other understanding what Trish meant but their boyfriends didn't look so sure of what was going on.
"So I can't kiss you?" Edge asked Lita with a yearning.
"Why would you want to the girl doesn't even know how to wash her face," Hunter said noticing all the chocolate on Lita's face and Shawn shoved him into the corner where he landed on LC, Charlene and Cassidy i.e. right where he wanted to be.
Suddenly someone pounded on the door.
"Hunter you in there?" came the voice of Stephanie McMahon.
"You can break the spell over him though Lita," Trish said falling back into her boyfriend's hair.
"No not yet!" Hunter pleaded, "Stephanie's treating me like a kid I don't wanna hang with her right now,"
"That's because you are a kid, let Lita change you back and she won't treat you like one anymore," Nitro said.
"Okay can we get off this subject?" Hunter said stubbornly.
"So if you don't wanna hang with Stephanie who do you wanna hang with?" Shawn asked and Hunter looked over at LC who smiled shyly at him and Shawn hit his head, "That is so wrong," he said.
"Look the Bible says when you're a child you act as a child acts and when you're a man you put away childish things. My reflection says I am a child so excuse me if I hang out with my people," Hunter said putting his arm around LC who was still stunned over the news that it was the actual Triple H that she was sitting next to.
"Hunter-" Shawn started.
"Read the Bible Shawn, it's in there!" Hunter said firmly.
"Should I open the door?" Nitro asked.
"Yeah well it's not like we can do anything right now anyway, move over Mel," Lita said finding space in Carlito's hair next to Melina's legs.
"Hey get your own soft patch," Melina complained patting down Carlito's hair before resting her head on it.
"So you're just gonna go to sleep?" Edge asked incredulous as his girlfriend stretched out.
"Hey it's been a long two weeks give them a break," Carlito said.
"I cannot believe you Lita," Edge said unimpressed by his girlfriend's behavior.
"You got a better idea?" Carlito asked.
"As a matter of fact I do," Edge replied and jumped up off the bed and left the room to find Charlotte and Dan while Stephanie, Brandon and Charlene's father came inside.
"Where's my hus – I mean Hunter Shawn?" Stephanie asked HBK who Shawn pointed to the television where Hunter was watching cartoons with LC, Charlene and Cassidy.
"How come he's still like that?" she asked him.
"I suggest you take it up with him," Shawn responded.
"Excuse me has anyone seen Shawn Michaels?" said Brandon.
"Whassup playa," Shawn said getting a kick out of the way people couldn't tell it was him dressed up like a member of Cryme Tyme as Brandon came over to HBK a little intimidated by his new look.
"Where's your girlfriend?" He asked and Shawn frowned.
"Girlfriend?" he asked not understanding what Brandon meant.
"You know that woman you were at Carlito's breakfast party with?" Brandon said.
"He means Lita," Cryme Tyme answered and Shawn shot them each a dark look.
"That was Lita?" Brandon said surprised, "Man she looked so different, I had no idea you two were together,"
"She's not what she seems on TV – I mean we're not together I'm married!" Shawn explained.
"Yeah he was ridin' dirty!" JTG said teasingly and HBK switched on him.
"That's enough!" he said and JTG jumped back.
"Be careful he scares demons man," Shad warned JTG.
"I can see why," JTG replied.
"I'm sorry my mistake, you just looked like a couple", Brandon said.
"Well we're not!" Shawn snapped.
"Yet!" Cryme Tyme said.
"Shut up!" Shawn barked at them.
"Hey cholos either keep it down or get out!" Carlito snapped pointing to the door.
"Okay I 'm sorry, do you know where she is?" Brandon asked and Shawn looked over at Carlito whose face said "Don't even think about it."
"She's asleep she's had a long two weeks," HBK answered and Brandon nodded.
"Could you could get a message to her for me?" Brandon asked.
"Sure what?" Shawn asked.
"Tell her Brandon said thank you for making me believe in God again, she told me I'd be around to see my sister walk again and she was right, God bless her she was right," Brandon said and Shawn smiled brightly.
"I'd be happy to pass that message along," he said sincerely.
"Thanks Shawn, love your cornrows by the way," Brandon said.
"They itch like Hell," Shawn said itching his hair and Shad slapped his hands away.
"You wanna look good for the party don't you?" Shad said.
"Hey I'm HBK I always look good," Shawn replied showing off his platinum grill that spelt out 'Showstoppa'.
"Shawn please you're making me wanna throw up over here," Hunter yelled.
"I wish you could always stay small," LC said to him hitting his shoulder playfully, "you're fun to hang around with," then she stopped herself, did I just say that out loud? she thought.
"Be careful what you wish for LC, you just might get it," he replied flirtatiously and was about to kiss her when Stephanie pulled him up by his hair.
"Okay Lil' Romeo let's go," she said while LC tried to catch her breath nearly passing out on account of the fact that she nearly kissed The Game.
"You too Charlene," Charlene's father said to his daughter who turned her lip up agitatedly.
"Come on Cassidy, we're gonna head down to the beach and go for a swim just like you wanted," Brandon said excitedly.
"You're going to the beach?" Hunter asked swinging from his hair.
"Yeah Montego Bay," Brandon replied.
"I've got an idea why don't we all go together?" Hunter said, "We can go in my Big Sister's Hummer limousine!"
Everyone gasped.
"That's your Hummer limousine outside?" Cassidy gushed.
"I told you my Big Sister's loaded, whad'ya say we all ride down to Montego Bay in style?" Hunter suggested and the idea went over very well with all the room occupants.
"I don't know if that's such a good idea Hunter," Stephanie said wary of what her father would do if anything bad happened to his latest toy.
"What's the matter Steph? Afraid something bad's gonna happen to your Daddy's pride and joy?" Shawn teased her and she snarled at him.
"You're not even supposed to be here," she snapped back.
"Nothing can keep us apart, not even your crazy insane father," Shawn said hi-fiving Hunter.
"I bet I can!" Stephanie snapped not liking Shawn's brash new attitude, at least not when it made her look bad.
"Why don't you want Hunter to be with his real family?" asked LC in the cutest way possible and everybody looked at Stephanie like she was the bad guy.
"Alright!" she said releasing Hunter who fell on LC.
"Sorry," he said and LC started to tackle him, her wrestling instincts taking over her romantic instincts at the slightest hint of contact.
"What's with all the aggression?" Brandon asked Cassidy as LC tried to apply a Hammer Lock.
"What do you think?" she said to her brother and Charlene giggled knowing that Triple H was one of LC's favorite wrestlers and it would be a cold day in Hell before she let the opportunity to wrestle him pass her by.
She really is competitive with boys Stephanie thought to herself a pang of jealousy taking her by surprise.
"Can I go too Daddy?" Charlene said to her father.
"Sure but I'm coming with, I'm not leaving you alone with these degenerates," he said looking over at all the WWE Superstars.
Hunter looked over at Shawn who nodded that he was thinking the same thing.
"Your father's going down Charlene," Hunter said and Charlene shrugged.
"Just as long as I'm there when it happens," she said getting up with everyone else.
"Aren't you coming Carlito?" Shawn asked the Puerto Rican but he wasn't there, "Hey where'd he go?"
Shawn crawled over to the other side of the bed and saw Carlito on the floor with Lita, Trish and a full size Melina.
"Melina!" Nitro called out.
"I guess my task is complete!" she said gleefully.
"One down," Shawn said as Nitro ran over to hug his girlfriend then he saw Hunter in a pinning predicament with LC and snatched him off her and put him up on his shoulders, "Three to go,"
"Let's go Lita," LC said coming over to get her.
"Just a sec," Lita replied and she jumped up on the drawer handle of the bedside table and pulled herself up onto it and went to grab her boots.
"Oh no you don't!" Carlito said snatching the boots and walking out of the room before Lita could even say anything."What is she doing, she's had those things on for two weeks?" Carlito asked Trish who had climbed back up into her boyfriend's afro.
"Honey you will never understand the relationship between a girl and her shoes," Trish replied and went back to sleep as her boyfriend headed out of the room and over to the elevator with his girlfriend sleeping quietly inside his hair.
"Hey LC where are you taking me?" Lita said noticing that they weren't heading towards the door with everyone else.
"To the bathroom to wash your face," LC replied opening the bathroom door and dampening a face cloth. She put Lita on the side of the sink, "Now hold still," she said edging the cloth towards Lita's messy face.
Suddenly there was a loud smashing sound that sent everyone flying back into the room. Running up to the bathroom door Melina, Nitro, Shawn and Hunter and Cryme Tyme saw a broken sink with a full sized Lita sitting on top of it.
"It really is you!" Shad said amazed that the little doll was now a life sized Lita.
"In the flesh, I guess my task is complete too," she said as they helped her up.
"I think you need to lay off the chocolate," Hunter said looking at the broken sink.
"Nah Shawn likes his women big!" JTG teased HBK who had just about had enough of Cryme Tyme's taunts and chased JTG out of the hotel room. Unfortunately Shawn forgot that he had Hunter on his shoulder's and The Game hit his head on the door frame on the way out and fell to the ground.
"Shawn you idiot!" he yelled as HBK chased JTG all the way down the lobby, suddenly Hunter felt this uncontrollable urge to cry and he started balling hysterically.
"Baby what's the matter?" Stephanie said coming back into the room and kneeling down to him.
"I hit my head!" Hunter sobbed.
"Aw poor baby, come here," Stephanie said about to pick him up when LC came over taking her by surprise.
"Knock it off!" she said and slapped Hunter around the face, "I've taken worse bumps than that just getting out of bed! What kind of a Cerebral Assassin are you?" she said with hositlity, "Now lets run him down and kick his ass!"
"LC!" Stephanie said surprised by her aggression picking Hunter up.
"Put me down!" Hunter insisted wriggling free and landing on his feet, he looked straight over at LC and extended his hand, "My dear you know me better than I know myself, would you care to join me in an HBK ass-kicking contest?" he asked courteously.
LC bowed toward him, "It would be my honor," she replied and Hunter lead her out of the room then looked back up at Stephanie, "I'll see you in the Hummer," he said disdainfully and ran after Shawn with LC by his side.
Stephanie turned to look at Lita, "What just happened?" she asked her.
"I think you just lost your husband to a seven year-old girl," Lita replied.
A cunning smile suddenly came over Stephanie's face, "Well two can play at that game," she said and walked out of the room smiling to herself.
Melina and Nitro looked at Lita, "What did you say that for?" Nitro asked.
"Have someone pat your head like a dog and see if you like it!" Lita retaliated and Melina shook her head thinking that being around children was turning everyone crazy. Speaking of, I wonder how Randy's doing? she said her thoughts turning to the Legend Killer as Nitro stuck his tongue out at Lita who started making funny faces at him.